Sooo worked as a volunteer at indiefest and when I went to meet the Stage Manager at the Green Stage, she asked me, "Oh were you dropped off by your parents?"
Me: .......No..I'm old enough to drive myself.

Was goin through some of my old messages..I had like 150 pages of messages that I've neglected to delete. It's kind of amazing to read messages from 4 years ago and to be put back in that mindset...memories just come flooding back. Some good..some not so good..some that you wish you weren't reminded of. It's also kind of depressing to read messages from people that you used to be so close to and have inside jokes with..and now you don't. What causes that? What causes that distance to occur between people? Do we just grow apart?

It's fucking emotionally exhausting. A mindfuck really.

Maybe some things are meant to be left in the past and stay there. Maybe I should just delete all.

Not doin so great on the job front but things just got a little more hairy...may have to move home for a bit because they are threatening to turn my apartment complex into condos so I may be kicked out or I may have to leave during the transition if I do buy it as a condo...no idea at this point what's goin happen but I'm goin fight for it not to happen. So the question is do I look for work in SD or HB and should it be odd jobs or something permenant which I may have to give up at any moment? Bleh.

Did manage to score two gigs- Goin do props for David Copperfield and a dresser for Hairspray next month in Long Beach. :)

I'm getting tired of working with older women that have almost grown children. They seem to think that I'm one of their children and treat me as such and it's been getting on my nerves. I especially hate it when they effing have to fix my collar or straighten my shirt or something..bloody hell I can dress myself! I swear!!! It just irks me when they tell me what to do or how to do something "better" known as their way or when they accuse me of doing something wrong and it wasn't me that did it. I was a dresser recently and we had to do a 30 second quick change where I velcro-ed the actor's rigged shirt and vest. Well, while he was onstage, his vest was open and the other momdresser said, "You were supposed to velcro it. Why didn't you do it?" I fucking did if you were watching!! Meanwhile, he and another actor onstage BOTH had their vests open because the actor did it onstage and it was required in the scene. Grrrrr...I hate how they think they're always right jsut because they're older.  Mind your own fucking business and let me do my job. If I want advice I will ask for it. I feel like I constantly have to defend myself.
Does anyone else have this problem??? How do you handle it??

gonna be brief- really tired. bad day.
Jasmine - thought she was a for sure bet..but..no. goodbye. she looks like someone.  

Matt G - effin hate coldplay. and don't pick coldplay songs. nobody but coldplay can sing them. 

Jeanine - begging..really? begging? american will not go for it.
Nick/Norman - he could make it if the rest of the boys eff up.

Allison - i like her a lot. i could definitely see her going far. they could market the hell out of her. she kinda looks like kelly clarkson in a weird way. she better be careful though because she has a rocker voice and may not be able to sing songs from each genre.

Kris - he looks like marco from degrassi. that's all i remember.

Megan - she was one of my faves. i hope she goes through. she was doing a weird swishy dance..guess it was nerves? she's awesome.

Matt B - he looks like a real life homer simpson. did ok..didn't really add anything to the song.

Jesse - ha. first jailbird of the season. it's weird.she looks gorg in her headshot but kinda busted in real life.

Kai - Meh. Don't know who his audience would be.

Mishavonna - a giant MEH.

Adam - A Big DUH. he's through. I KNEW he was a musical theatre geek! I knew it!! He's like the Edward Cullens of music. All the teen girls will vote for him.

Sooo..lately I've been on facebook much more than Myspace. It seems like most people are ditching myspace for facebook now and even deleting their accounts. I still check my myspace daily and there are elements on myspace that I like that facebook doesn't have: bulletins, blogs, music, etc.

I'm pretty selective about who I choose to add because I'm pretty blunt about things, I like to not censor myself, I post party pictures, and I cuss. Well..now I pretty much can't do that on facebook seeing as how the WHOLE DAMN WORLD IS NOW ON THERE!!!! People that my parents know are adding me!!! Some of my dad's friends added me, my dad's coworkers, etc. And to put a cherry on top of the cake, people are looking for my parents through me. I recieved a message from someone that my parents went to high school with looking to reach them.

I know I know...don't post on the internet what you don't want others to see...but...I only posted that stuff because I only added my friends and now my friends list has expanded to people I don't want seeing that stuff. Sigh.
I mean..I don't post anything terribly raunchy or anything...but..I like having the option to say or post whatever I want and now I can't. I don't want stuff that I said online being repeated back to my parents. And I can't just delete them because they actually write me messages..grrrr.

Adding co-workers and professors on facebook is one thing- we're theatre people. We're more open about stuff. Nothing offends anyone and the professors pretty much know what's going on anyways and they're immune to seeing us party...cause let's face it..we party..and we even party with the professors.

But not everyone is that liberal. Especially people at my dad's workplace...they're all major Conservative Republican Christians. Yeah...they're goin love seeing my page lol.

I dunno...bleh.

Well...my thoughts have changed on these people...lol. saw some of tonight..forgot to tape it b/c of work. so only 3 get through..hmm...what if it's all boys?? lol
 
Tatiana Del Toro - "Saving All My Love For You" (Whitney Houston)- 0.0 Damnit. She was actually good. If it were based on voice, she would go through...but she's so effing crazy!!! So I dunno..either her personality will work for or way against her. She needs someone to dress her..and not in the dark. She's not as thin as she thinks she is and shouldn't dress the way she does. Another thing...she's pretty...but she was trying to be all sexy and..she's SO NOT sexy. I'm surprised that she didn't wink and blow a kiss at the camera.

Stevie Wright - "Love Story" (Taylor Swift)- had to youtube this because i forgot to type it and i was at work. I don't know this song..but..after listening to this..I wish I still didn't know this song. FAIL.

Anne Marie Boskovich - "(You Make Me Feel Like A) Natural Woman" (Aretha Franklin)- Another fail. Never ever do a song like this especially when a previous idol sang it and sang it freakin awesome. She's pretty but..no.

Jackie Tohn - "A Little Less Conversation" (Elvis)- youtubed this..i think she froze my computer. really not good.

Casey Carlson - "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" (The Police)- youtubed this..bloody hell this was terrible. bad hair. glad i could only hear and not see thid trainwreck. buh bye. go back to the bikini.  

Alexis Grace - "Never Loved A Man (The Way I Loved You)" (Aretha Franklin)- She'll prolly go through..not my fave but good. dunno if this look is really her though.

Anoop Desai - "Angel of Mine" (Monica)- was prolly the best of the night- he'll definitely get in. people always sound weird singing a song originally sung by the opposite sex.

Michael Sarver - "I Don't Wanna Be" (Gavin DeGraw)-ughhh..HATE this song. He was ok..meh.

Stephen Fowler- "Rock With You" (Michael Jackson)- He's a goner. At least he remembered the words.

Danny Gokey - "Hero" (Mariah Carey)- well he was majorly pimped! Performance was ok...i didn't go batshit crazy over it like everyone else..but he's a sure bet to get through.

Ricky Braddy - "A Song For You" (Donny Hathaway)- didn't get to see this but he sounded pretty good. don't remember him previous to this though.

Brent Keith - couldn't find him on youtube

Group 1:


Casey
She's cute so I think that she'll prolly get through..unless she fucks up majorly.


Stevie
Don't really remember her other than she was named after Stevie Nicks...and she kinda looks like Jessica Biel.


Alexis
Meh...She's good I guess. She's a mom..that's really all I remember.


Ann Marie
This was the girl that had to redo her wardrobe and make-up during her audition right? I think that she might go through.


Tatiana
Ughhhh GET RID OF HER. Most annoying person ever.


Jackie
Crap...I think she had a good chance to go through too..but only 2 guys and 2 girls go through right? I remember that she has a raspy voice and AI doesn't really know how to handle raspy girls..dunno. She had a cool personality. And she freakin looks like someone but I don't know who.


Danny
Robert Downy Jr. He'll prolly go through.


Stephen
Umm...don't really remember him.


Anoop
There's been a lot of buzz about this kid. He's a shoe-in.


Ricky
Don't remember.


Michael S.
Umm...I think he did well? Don't remember.


Brent
And don't remember.
 
And Kelly Clarkson's new song- it's catchy as hell so of course it's already number 1. It's the worst song title ever..I mean.. "My Life Would Suck Without You"...really??? How Avril Lavigne can you get??? Kelly is 26 years old!!! Sing stuff for your own age!!! I'm kinda disappointed that she decided to get back with Clive Davis and switch back to the old guilty pleasure pop type music..Her last album was awesome especially since she chose the music herself..meh...anything to sell records I guess. At least she's not Hollywood thin- I'm proud of her that she's normal sized and doesn't let all the gossip get to her.