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Gender: Male
Status: Divorced
Age: 100
Sign: Pisces

City: TORONTO
State: Ontario
Country: CA
Signup Date: 5/11/2006

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Wednesday, December 12, 2007 4:55 PM

Please read,
Category: Blogging

..> ..>

Please read, while this is long...I challenge you to find it within yourself to take the time. Life brings many trials and tribulations and also happiness and joy. Take a Moment to read this and know that I sent this because I had a choice and this was mine. I also sent it through email because you didn't have a FunWall (which is okay, I wanted to share this with you...perhaps it will touch you as it has touched me in a very deep, deep way, more than you could possibly know).

Wishing you an abundance of Love to surround you with family and friends to share it with and the choice to make a difference! Smiles and Hugs for you and yours, Noreen

Two Choices

What would you do?....you make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice?

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection. Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is the natural order of things in my son?'

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. 'I believe, that when a child like Shay, physically and mentally handicapped comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.'

Then he told the following story:

Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' Shay's father knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but the father also understood that if his son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. His Father watched with a small tear in his eye and warmth in his heart. The boys saw the father's joy at his son being accepted. In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.

The game would now be over. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!' Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!' Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball ... the smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team. He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head. Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the way Shay'

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third! Shay, run to third!'

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!' Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making his father so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

AND NOW A LITTLE FOOTNOTE TO THIS STORY: We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message. Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference. We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.' So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice: Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:45 AM

Marijuana may increase psychosis risk, analysis says
Category: Blogging

Marijuana may increase psychosis risk, analysis says

LONDON, England (AP) -- Using marijuana seems to increase the chance of becoming psychotic, researchers report in an analysis of past research that reignites the issue of whether pot is dangerous

The new review suggests that even infrequent use could raise the small but real risk of this serious mental illness by 40 percent.

Doctors have long suspected a connection and say the latest findings underline the need to highlight marijuana's long-term risks. The research, paid for by the British Health Department, is being published Friday in medical journal The Lancet.

"The available evidence now suggests that cannabis is not as harmless as many people think," said Dr. Stanley Zammit, one of the study's authors and a lecturer in the department of psychological medicine at Cardiff University.

The researchers said they couldn't prove that marijuana use itself increases the risk of psychosis, a category of several disorders with schizophrenia being the most commonly known.

There could be something else about marijuana users, "like their tendency to use other drugs or certain personality traits, that could be causing the psychoses," Zammit said.

Marijuana is the most frequently used illegal substance in many countries, including the United Kingdom and the United States. About 20 percent of young adults report using it at least once a week, according to government statistics.

Zammit and colleagues from the University of Bristol, Imperial College and Cambridge University examined 35 studies that tracked tens of thousands of people for periods ranging from one year to 27 years to examine the effect of marijuana on mental health.

They looked for psychotic illnesses as well as cognitive disorders including delusions and hallucinations, bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety, neuroses and suicidal tendencies.

They found that people who used marijuana had roughly a 40 percent higher chance of developing a psychotic disorder later in life. The overall risk remains very low.

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For example, Zammit said the risk of developing schizophrenia for most people is less than 1 percent. The prevalence of schizophrenia is believed to be about five in 1,000 people. But because of the drug's wide popularity, the researchers estimate that about 800 new cases of psychosis could be prevented by reducing marijuana use.

The scientists found a more disturbing outlook for "heavy users" of pot, those who used it daily or weekly: Their risk for psychosis jumped to a range of 50 percent to 200 percent.

One doctor noted that people with a history of mental illness in their families could be at higher risk. For them, marijuana use "could unmask the underlying schizophrenia," said Dr. Deepak Cyril D'Souza, an associate professor of psychiatry at Yale University, who was not involved in the study.

Dr. Wilson Compton, a senior scientist at the National Institute on Drug Abuse in Washington, called the study persuasive.

"The strongest case is that there are consistencies across all of the studies," and that the link was seen only with psychoses -- not anxiety, depression or other mental health problems, he said.

Scientists cannot rule out that pre-existing conditions could have led to both marijuana use and later psychoses, he added.

Scientists think it is biologically possible that marijuana could cause psychoses because it interrupts important neurotransmitters such as dopamine. That can interfere with the brain's communication systems.

Some experts say governments should now work to dispel the misconception that marijuana is a benign drug.

"We've reached the end of the road with these kinds of studies," said Dr. Robin Murray of King's College, who had no role in the Lancet study. "Experts are now agreed on the connection between cannabis and psychoses. What we need now is for 14-year-olds to know it."

In the U.K., the government will soon reconsider how marijuana should be classified in its hierarchy of drugs. In 2004, it was downgraded and penalties for possession were reduced. Many expect marijuana will be bumped up to a class "B" category, with offenses likely to lead to arrests or longer jail sentences.

Two of the authors of the study were invited experts on the Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs Cannabis Review in 2005. Several authors reported being paid to attend drug company-sponsored meetings related to marijuana, and one received consulting fees from companies that make antipsychotic medications. -->startclickprintexclude--> E-mail to a friend -->endclickprintexclude-->

All About Marijuana • Illegal Drugs

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:44 AM

Supervisor Drug-Free Workplace Training
Category: Blogging

Supervisor Drug-Free Workplace Training

Working Partners for an

Alcohol- and Drug-Free Workplace

Provided by the Office of the Assistant Secretary for Policy

U.S. Department of Labor

Supervisor Training Outline

Objectives of training
Overview of Drug-Free Workplace Policy
Supervisors' responsibilities
Identifying performance problems and handling potential crisis situations
Recognizing problems
Intervention and referral
Protecting confidentiality
Continued supervision
Enabling and supervisor traps
Dos and Don'ts for supervisors

Objectives of Training

The different components of the Drug-Free Workplace Policy
Their role in implementing the Drug-Free Workplace Policy

At the end of the training, supervisors should understand:

At the end of the training, supervisors should know how to:

Identify and investigate crisis situations
Recognize workplace problems that may be related to alcohol and other drugs
Intervene in problem situations
Refer employees who have problems with alcohol and other drugs
Protect employee confidentiality
Continue to supervise employees who have been referred to assistance
Avoid enabling and supervisor traps

Overview of Drug-Free
Workplace Policy

Sends a clear message that use of alcohol and drugs in the workplace is prohibited
Encourages employees who have problems with alcohol and other drugs to voluntarily seek help

The Drug-Free Workplace Policy accomplishes two major things:

The Drug-Free Workplace Policy exists to:

Protect the health and safety of all employees, customers and the public
Safeguard employer assets from theft and destruction
Protect trade secrets
Maintain product quality and company integrity and reputation
Comply with the Drug-Free Workplace Act of 1988 or any other applicable laws

The Drug-Free Workplace Policy answers the following questions:

What is the purpose of the policy and program?
Who is covered by the policy?
When does the policy apply?
What behavior is prohibited?
Are employees required to notify supervisors of drug-related convictions?
Does the policy include searches?
Does the program include drug testing?

What are the consequences for violating the policy?
Are there Return-to-Work Agreements?
What type of assistance is available to employees needing help?
How is employee confidentiality protected?
Who is responsible for enforcing the policy?
How is the policy communicated to employees?

Supervisors' Responsibilities

Maintain a safe, secure and productive environment for employees
Evaluate and discuss performance with employees
Treat all employees fairly
Act in a manner that does not demean or label people

It is your responsibility, as a supervisor, to:

It is NOT your responsibility, as a
supervisor, to:

Diagnose drug and alcohol problems
Have all the answers
Provide counseling or therapy
Be a police officer

Legally sensitive areas:

Safeguard employees' confidentiality
Ensure the policy is clearly communicated
Establish procedures to thoroughly investigate alleged violations
Provide due process and ample opportunity for response to allegations
If testing is included, ensure quality control and confirmation of positive tests
Conform to union contracts, if applicable

Identifying Performance Problems and Handling Potential Crisis Situations

Distinguishing between a crisis situation and a performance problem
Crisis situations are less common than performance problems and can consist of:
- Dangerous behavior
- Threatening behavior
- Obvious impairment
- Possession of alcohol and other drugs
- Illegal activity

Questions to consider when investigating

a potential drug or alcohol crisis situation:

What exactly do you see?
Does there appear to be illegal activity, policy violations or unusual behavior taking place?
Is a group of people involved or a single employee?
Are you the direct supervisor to anyone involved in the incident?
Are reliable witnesses available?
Is any physical danger involved in taking action or not taking action?

(cont.)

Is the situation serious enough to require calling security or law enforcement?
Is there a specific policy that applies to the situation?
Does the situation require expert consultation from Human Resources, the Employee Assistance Program (EAP), if applicable, or security?
Is this a situation that calls for reasonable-suspicion testing?
Have you documented what you see and what you have done in response?

Recommended actions to take when

confronted with a possible drug or

alcohol situation:

Ask the employee to come to private area with another supervisor and/or security personnel
Inquire about the behavior, rumor or report
Inform the employee of your concerns
Get his or her explanation of what is going on
If you feel there is a problem, notify your superior

If there is evidence or suspicion of recent use, and based upon the employee's response and your drug-free workplace policy, the supervisor should:

Refer the employee to the EAP, if applicable
Place the employee on suspension until a formal investigation takes place
Arrange for the employee to be escorted home
Escort the employee to a collection for the drug test, if applicable

Recognizing Problems

Addiction:

The irresistible compulsion to use alcohol and other drugs despite adverse consequences. It is characterized by repeated failures to control use, increased tolerance and increased disruption in the family.

Ongoing performance problems that do not respond to normal supervisory actions may be signs of addiction and other personal problems and may require more intervention. Examples of common performance problems that may be indicators of underlying addiction include:

Poor attendance - tardiness, unexplained

absences, long lunches

Co-workers or customer complaints
Mistakes and missed deadlines

Intervention and Referral

Document the performance problem
Get yourself ready
Set the stage
Use constructive confrontation
Refer for assistance
Follow up on progress towards meeting performance goals

Steps to take when you have identified a performance problem:

Constructive confrontation:

Tell employee you are concerned about his/her performance
State problem
Refer to documentation of specific events
Avoid over-generalizations
Ask for explanation

Avoid getting involved in discussions of personal problems
Try to get employee to acknowledge what you see as the problem
State what must be done to correct problem
Set time frame for performance improvement
Specify consequences if problem continues

Protecting Confidentiality

For supervisor referrals to be effective, an employee needs to know that:

Problems will not be made public
Conversations with an EAP professional - or other referral agent - are private and will be protected
All information related to performance issues will be maintained in his/her personnel file

Information about referral to treatment, however, will be kept separately
Information about treatment for addiction or mental illness is not a matter of public record and cannot be shared without a signed release from the employee
If an employee chooses to tell coworkers about his/her private concerns, that is his/her decisions
When an employee tells his/her supervisor something in confidence, supervisors are obligated to protect that disclosure

If EAP services are available, employees are also assured that:

EAP records are separate from personnel records and can be accessed only with a signed release from the employee
EAP professionals are bound by a code of ethics to protect the confidentiality of the employees and family members that they serve
There are clear limits on when and what information an EAP professional can share and with whom

However, there are some limits on confidentiality that may require:

Disclosure of child abuse, elder abuse and serious threats of homicide or suicide as dictated by state law
Reporting participation in an EAP to the referring supervisor
Reporting the results of assessment and evaluation following a positive drug test
Verifying medical information to authorize release time or satisfy fitness-for-duty concerns as specified in company policy
Revealing medical information to the insurance company in order to qualify for coverage under a benefits plan

Continued Supervision

Continuing feedback about behavior and performance
Encouragement to follow through with continuing care and support groups
Accurate performance appraisals and fair treatment
Time to adjust to doing things differently
Respect for his or her privacy
Open lines of communication
Corrective action if old behaviors reappear

After constructive confrontation and referral, the employee will need:

Enabling

Enabling: Action that you take that protects the employee from the consequences of his/her actions and actually helps the employee to NOT deal with the problem.

Examples of enabling:

Covering Up
Rationalizing
Withdrawing/Avoiding

Blaming
Controlling
Threatening

Supervisor Traps

Sympathy
Excuses
Apology
Diversions

Innocence
Anger
Pity
Tears

Dos for Supervisors

DO emphasize that you only are concerned with work performance or conduct
DO have documentation or performance in front of you when you talk with the employee
DO remember that many problems get worse without assistance
DO emphasize that conversations with an EAP, if applicable, are confidential
DO explain that an EAP, if applicable, is voluntary and exists to help the employee
DO call an EAP, if applicable, to discuss how to make a referral

Don'ts for Supervisors

DON'T try to diagnose the problem
DON'T moralize. Limit comments to job performance and conduct issues only
DON'T discuss alcohol and drug use
DON'T be misled by sympathy-evoking tactics
DON'T cover up. If you protect people, it enables them to stay the same
DON'T make threats that you do not intend to carry out

A Roadmap to a Safer,
Drug-Free Workplace

Identify and investigate crisis situations
Recognize workplace problems that may be related to alcohol and other drugs
Intervene in problem situations
Refer employees who have problems with alcohol and other drugs
Protect employee confidentiality
Continue to supervise employees who have been referred to assistance
Avoid enabling and common supervisor traps

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:42 AM

DO’s and DON’T’s When Falsely Accused Of Sexual Abuse
Category: Blogging

..> ..>

DO's and DON'T's When Falsely Accused Of Sexual Abuse

This material is brought to you courtesy of NASVO, the National Association of State VOCAL Organizations

Many wives involved in a custody dispute will file false charges of molestation or sexual abuse against their spouse in order to gain the upper hand. This is a devastatingly effective tactic in many cases, and is becoming a commomly used means of stopping a custody battle in it's tracks. If you're accused of sexually abusing your children, immediately contact your attorney and then follow these guidelines:

DON'T INVITE LAW ENFORCEMENT OR SOCIAL SERVICES INTO YOUR HOME WITHOUT A WARRANT. This waives your right under illegal search and seizure under the Constitution. This will allow them to come into your home at ANY TIME and search and seize your children or belongings.
DON'T SPEAK TO ANYONE ABOUT YOUR CASE without first consulting a lawyer. Everything you say can and will be used against you. If you cannot afford a lawyer one will be appointed to you if you are arrested. No attorney will be appointed to you if this is a civil case (family law). In some states, attorneys are appointed to parents in juvenile dependency court. Contact the local Bar Association or legal information service nearest you for this information.
DON'T CONTACT THE ALLEGED VICTIM, THEIR FAMILY, OR PROSECUTION WITNESSES. Any and all such contact will be construed as an attempt to bribe or threaten the alleged victim into silence or recantation. Such contact must be done through a PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR who will work through or with your attorney.
DO GO ATTORNEY SHOPPING. Seek out an attorney who is experienced in child abuse cases (specifically false cases). For assistance, contact your local VOCAL or call NASVO at (916) 863-7470. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you in criminal court. If you are in civil court (family), you must pay for your own attorney. Depending on the state, you may or may not be appointed an attorney in juvenile dependency court.
DON'T TURN TO DRUGS OR ALCOHOL. Such substances are habit-forming and are depressants. They can cause you to jeopardize your case.
DO KEEP ACTIVE. Physical and social activity are healthy and will assist in keeping depression at bay.
DO HIRE A PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR. Some attorneys have their own in-house investigators. Some do not, and IT IS CRUCIAL THAT AN INVESTIGATOR BE IMMEDIATELY ASSIGNED TO YOUR CASE. If your attorney does not provide one, call NASVO for references.
DO KEEP A DAILY JOURNAL. A journal should document what you do, where you go and people who see you or are with you. Keep receipts of purchases for evidence of activities. Go through canceled checks, photos, letters and holiday experiences to back-date a journal. Try to reconstruct everything you did and where you were at the time of the allegation. Give a copy of the journal to your investigator and lawyer; it may provide evidence.
DO STRIP-SEARCH THE ACCUSING CHILD'S ROOM, if the child lived in your home. It can provide proof of your child's activities and sexual and social habits. Look for notes, letters, diaries, photos, telephone numbers, drug or sexual paraphernalia. Give copies to your investigator and your lawyer.
DO PAY YOUR ATTORNEY OR INVESTIGATOR. The people you hire for your defense are professionals and will work toward finding a solid defense. It is advisable to ALWAYS ENTER INTO A CONTRACT AGREEMENT FOR FEES. This sets the boundaries of your agreement and protects both you and your defense professional from failure.
DOCUMENT EVERYTHING If possible, tape record or video tape all conversations with anyone involved in your case, as well as any visits you may have with your child. Federal law says that it is legal to make tape recordings as long as one person being taped consents to it. Some states say otherwise; California is one of them. To legally tape record anyone in California (state law) you must advise them that you are going to tape record the conversation and that if they do not wish to be taped then they have the right to remain silent. If you are unable to tape conversations or visits, then document the situation as it is happening or as soon afterwards as possible. Be sure to include as much detail as possible.
START A PAPER TRAIL Every time you talk to Social Services, document what was said and write a letter to that person asking them to confirm or deny the contents of the letter within 10 calendar days. In your letter state that "failure to confirm or deny the contents of the letter will constitute an agreement that the information contained therein is accurate". Send the letter by certified mail or Return Receipt Requested. Faxes can sent as long as you have verification that the fax was sent and received. Make sure that you cc: copies of all these letters to your attorney. Advise your attorney (in writing) to send copies of the letter to County Counsel, other attorney's involved in the case and to the judge IF your attorney feels that it is appropriate and that it might be to your advantage.
ARM YOURSELF - WITH POWER Knowledge is power. Knowing how the system works and what is required of social workers can help you put them on the defensive when you force them to do their job properly!
For California, call the State Department of Social Services at (916) 657-3661 and request a copy of DIVISION 31, CHILD WELFARE SERVICES PROGRAM Manual of Policies and Procedures. Ask to be put on their update list and you will automatically get updates to the manual. Your FREE copy of the manual should arrive about two weeks later. It contains the regulations that CPS is supposed to follow.

Read the manual and document all violations. Give your attorney a copy. In court, your attorney can basically "put CPS on trial", forcing them to defend their actions. This takes the focus off you. If your attorney puts you on the stand, the focus should be on your concern for your child (i.e., regression, poor grades, behavior changes, etc.). This strategy will not guarantee a win, but it can change "the flavor of the court" in your favor.

You can also fax copies of the violations (along with a brief cover letter) to the agencies listed below. This could start an internal investigation into your case.
- Children's Operation Bureau; Attn.: Bill Lamb; Fax (916) 445-2898 or (916) 445-2836
- US Commission of Child & Family Welfare; Attn.: Kevin Costigan; Fax (202) 401-5539
- Call the Administration for Children & Families and ask where to send or fax your letter for their attention in this matter. The phone number is: (202) 401-9200.
LEARN TO TALK THEIR LINGO CPS uses key phrases like: "indicates, seems to think, appears, could be" and others to gain an advantage in court. Learn to use their key words in your everyday language so it becomes natural and then use them to your advantage on the witness stand. Their use of these phrases is no accident. They KNOW how it will look to the judge. The judge won't see their statements as implications and opinions but will accept them as facts instead. Whatever you do, DON'T LIE but DO use their key words to your advantage. You MUST be better prepared than they are!
CHECK YOUR COURT RECORDS Check all court documents for errors. Simple things like names and birth dates are often wrong. List all errors, give your attorney a copy. It establishes a pattern of errors which may be used in your favor (i.e., social worker incompetence).
Find opinions stated as facts, i.e. "The child was not unhappy, indicating he did not wish to return home." This is an opinion. The social worker has no idea how your child acts when he/she is happy, sad, scared, confused, tired or sick. The opinion didn't prove anything but a judge may see it as fact: "The child is happy at the foster home and does not want to go home." The judge will not side with you if this opinion isn't clarified!

List every opinion that is presented as fact and give your attorney a copy. Ask your attorney to clarify them in court. It might be enough to tip the scales in your direction. If nothing else, CPS will have some explaining to do in court!
WHO'S SAYING WHAT? If you are involved with CPS, you have the legal right to look through your case file (and to have copies of it). Social services may tell you that you must have your attorney request that information in writing. (It's not entirely legal for them to do that, but you don't really have many options here.) If that happens, ask your attorney to request a copy of ALL case notes and any other documentation that CPS has against you. Ask your attorney to give you copies of ALL information that is obtained so that you can list the errors and omissions in the documentation. (By law, CPS is required to list every contact they have had with you, including all phone calls, but they seldom document it unless they can use it against you.) This step may help you in your defense.
MAKE THEM 'PUT IT IN WRITING'! Any time CPS tries to force you to do something that is not in their plan (i.e. Reunification Plan or Family Maintenance Plan) tell them to put it in writing. (Example: CPS tells you that you can not talk to your child about the past or the future.) They will probably tell you, "I don't have to put it in writing. I told you what to do." At that point, simply inform them that you are not legally obligated to do as they requested unless you have a court order. Make sure that you tell them that you do not feel that those actions would be in your child's "best interests". (Some attorney's will tell you to go along with CPS anyway. They want to keep the peace and they don't want you to make the judge angry. There is some justification to this way of thinking.)
GET FRESH BLOOD Most attorneys work within their own county. Keep in mind that your attorney must face the same attorneys and judges day after day. They all know what to expect from each other and what kind of a response to expect from the court for various situations. Judges can prevent attorneys from providing their clients with the full benefit of their strategies and expertise, so get some fresh blood in the court room. Try to hire an attorney that is NOT from your county. If possible, hire an attorney from the capital city. Why?
1. The judge has no idea how your new attorney operates or where your attorney is from. The judge will wonder why you didn't choose someone local and will usually put their "best face" forward. (The judge may think he/she is "being watched" or "evaluated", especially if the judge discovers that your attorney is from the capital city!)
2. The judge will generally allow far more latitude in the trial to your new attorney. (This is definitely an advantage.)
3. Opposing counsel won't know what to expect either and it can shake them up enough so they will make mistakes that make CPS look bad. (It's happened before!)
4. The child's attorney doesn't know which way to go and will probably "straddle the fence" through the entire trial or switch sides in support of the defense. After all, the child's attorney wants to be on the WINNING side. It looks better that way!
STACK THE DECK Right now you probably have at least two attorney's fighting against your one attorney. In most cases the attorney for the child will side with CPS as long as they look like they are on the winning side. Keep in mind that your child's attorney is getting one-sided information. They are not talking to you. They are not asking you what you think is best for your child. Chances are, they aren't doing much talking to your child either. How can that attorney possibly know what is best for your child if he/she only spends an hour or two with your child? They can't. They rely on the information from the therapists (usually paid for and appointed by the county) and the information from the social workers.
You need ALL the help you can get. Two or more attorneys in your corner will certainly increase your chances of success. If there is a step-parent involved in the child's upbringing, have the step-parent declared a "defacto parent" (this entitles them to have an attorney, one may not be appointed for them, but at least the step-parent can get legal representation and this is another "ace up your sleeve"). If there is a grandparent that plays a very significant role in the child's life (i.e. grandma provides day care while parents work), they MAY be granted "defacto" status as well.

If there are any ex-spouses (child's natural parent) in the picture, he/she MAY be willing to have counsel appointed for them (or hire an attorney) with the understanding that all of you are WORKING TOGETHER FOR THE GOOD OF THE CHILD. It doesn't matter if the natural parents hate each other, the child is all that matters and those negative feelings MUST be put aside. CPS uses the strategy of divide and conquer. You must provide a UNITED front in order to defeat their efforts.
Even if just the natural parents involved, you can still stack the deck in your favor. Make certain you have TWO separate attorneys and that they are willing to work together. There is a great advantage to this. Chances are, one attorney has been on the case since close to the very beginning. The second attorney often comes in much later. The first attorney should already know more about your character, your efforts and so forth. What one attorney misses during questioning (including yourself) the other attorney can cover. Together hey can bring out points that one attorney alone might overlook. Double your chances of winning, get an additional attorney!
HELP YOUR ATTORNEY The more you do for your attorney, the better armed your attorney will be, and the easier it will be to win. When parents take an active role in their own defense their chances of winning are greatly increased. Don't just pay your attorney and walk away expecting the attorney to do the rest. Your attorney can not paddle your life boat for you unless you inflate it first. Help your attorney defend you. Do your own research, ask questions, and keep your attorney informed.
Keep a log of everything concerning your case (phone calls, research, etc.). Find cases similar to your own that has been won, make copies of your findings, and give a copy to your attorney. Make it easier for your attorney to defend you by preparing your attorney well.
PROVE YOUR CHARACTER Get Affidavits of Character from friends, co-workers and clergy. You can take them to the Clerk's office and request that they be attached to your file. Once they are attached to your file the judge is mandated BY LAW to read them. The Affidavits of Character can not be "thrown out of court" nor do they have to be entered into court as "evidence". You can take these steps without the assistance of your attorney. Another advantage to this is that it allows your friends and co-workers to "testify" for you without having to be subjected to a cross-examination by the prosecution. It is strictly a one-sided view, in YOUR favor! [See Note 1]
KNOW YOUR CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS The Bill of Rights, part of the United States Constitution, is the law. Unfortunately, we the people, often don't know what our rights are. We have, through our own ignorance, allowed the state courts and "the system" to strip us of those rights and we never raised a voice in protest. How did it happen? It happened one little step at a time, year after year, until the system is as it stands today. We can reverse this trend by demanding our rights. We can challenge the laws of the state, court rulings and "county policies" that have been declared local law. We the people have a duty to change the system when it no longer works. These are not idle words, they are the American dreams and ideals we grew up believing in. We can't rely on others to protect our rights, we must do it ourselves; the cavalry is not going to rush in to save us. Learn your Constitution and keep a list of the rights that were violated in your case. You can later use this information for civil suits if you wish to proceed in that manner.
TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO "BE A BROKEN RECORD" When any government official wants to question your child, he/she can answer each question with something to this effect:
"According to the Privacy Act of 1974, I don't have to answer any questions without my parents being present."
If they proceed to question your child without you being present, they are in direct violation of the law and can be sued for it. The state receives Federal Money and their employees are bound by the Privacy Act of 1974.
CAN I SUE? Yes. Some states are changing laws so that social workers can be sued for violations of civil rights. In California social workers will have the same immunity that police officers have starting on January 1, 1996. Social workers previously had absolute (total) immunity regardless of their actions. Civil law suits are forming all over the country. Some are class action suits, some are single suits. You can find out what suits are forming near you by calling various parents and family rights organizations (VOCAL, MASA, Fathers For Their Children, Protective Parents, Injustices In The Court, and so on). Who can be sued? The state, the county, social workers, police officers, foster parents, and sometimes judges and the federal government. It won't be easy, but your fight will ultimately help the next generation and each generation after that. By making the effort now, you are helping your children avoid the same dangers when they become parents themselves.
FILING AN INTERNATIONAL COMPLAINT You can file a complaint against the United States for violations of the Constitution. This complaint is filed with the U.N. and will remain as part of America's history for as long as the U.N. stands. Complaints can be filed for: false imprisonment, cruel and unusual punishment, torture, acts of terrorism, and so on. For more information, call VOCAL at (800) 745-8778 and request the address for the Florida VOCAL chapter that is compiling this information.
WHEN GOING PUBLIC.... If you go public with your story make your child "bigger than life". Have a picture of your child blown up to poster size. You can use it when giving speeches or protesting. It is a great attention getter, AND, the people you are speaking to are forced to "see" your child. Granted, it's only a picture, but your child is no longer a faceless victim of the system. Your audience will remember the color of your child's hair, the missing tooth, the grin, the glint in your child's eyes, and so forth. Your child will become real to them, rather than just being a statistic.
Do not use your child's name when protesting or giving speeches. Although the Constitution and the Supreme Court upholds your right to free speech, the judge in your case may not. The court may issue a "gag order" against you for "going public" and may claim you are "endangering your child" with your actions. You may be advised that "for your child's protection" these proceedings are confidential. You can also be fined or jailed. Only you can decide if it is worth the risk.

Note: Many copy stores charge less than $5 for a poster sized color enlargement.
WHEN YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU RIGHT! Letter writing campaigns can be a wonderful tool. Write to your politicians, as well as to the politicians that represent every member of your extended family (parents, siblings, etc.) and to those of your friends. Chances are you will come up with a long list of Assemblymen, Congressmen, State Senators and U.S. Senators around the country. Keep your letter simple, but be concise; anything over two pages will generally not get read. State the problem (e.g. CPS is trying to force us to lie in order to get our child back.) Include a cc: section on the letter (that can be page three). In your letters to politicians outside your area, send a cover sheet that contains a statement like:
"I know you don't have the jurisdiction to help me but you represent people in my family that are directly affected by the situation described herein."
You may think, 'Well if they can't help then why should I waste my time and money?' The answer is simple: this is how laws get changed. Your politicians may sweep your concerns under the rug but when you send letters to politicians across the country you are holding your own representatives accountable. Your politicians must face their peers and explain what they are doing about YOUR problem! It puts pressure on them to do something! It also keeps you busy and focused on your case. You're doing something positive regardless of the direct results and it proves how hard you fought for your child. Someday your child may read those letters and know how much you cared.

Note: cc: means - (carbon) copies sent to. Be sure to follow the colon with the names of the people that copies of your letter were sent to. (The more names, the better!)
CHECKING FOR PHONE TAPS/PHONE TRAPS If you believe your phone may be tapped, call the phone company's repair center and ask them to check the line for taps/traps. Tell them about any unusual sounds (humming, clicking, etc.) you may be hearing. The phone company may be willing to run a signal that can detect most devices. If they refuse to check your line for you it may be an indication that your phone is tapped or it may just be company policy.
Even if your phone lines are clear, that doesn't mean it's safe to talk freely. It is still possible for someone to listen in at the phone company rather than through the lines near your home.

Watch what you say on cellular phones, cordless phones, and car phones. Those calls can be monitored with a scanner.
PARANOID??? Think again. They really are out to get you. Make copies of EVERYTHING relating to your case. If you have a friend or relative that lives out of state (that CPS is not aware of) send copies of everything to that person for safekeeping. Do NOT rely on the safety of a safety deposit box. The state can get a warrant to open the box and confiscate your "evidence" against them. Ideally, keep one copy at home and one copy close by and keep one copy out of state.
CONTACT YOUR COUNTY GRAND JURY Many Grand Jury investigations of Child Protective Services are being done. The investigations are confidential; the public and CPS may be unaware of ongoing investigations. It is important to notify your county Grand Jury if CPS is violating your rights or not following their regulations. The Grand Jury may require a certain number of complaints before they will take action; your letter could be the one that will make the difference. Contacting the Grand Jury may help you and many others as well.

--> pstop -->

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:40 AM

Post-Trauma DOs and DON’Ts
Category: Blogging

..> ..>

Post-Trauma DOs and DON'Ts

..>..>

People who have experienced a traumatic event often demonstrate changes in behavior. These suggestions may reduce the probability of long-term stress reactions. If you are working closely with those who have experienced traumatic events, these suggestions may also be useful in helping you retain your emotional balance and perspective.

DOs

get enough rest
maintain a good diet and exercise program
find time and talk to supportive peers and family about incident
take time for leisure activities
follow a familiar routine
spend time with family and friends
discuss this traumatic event with a professional in a group or individually, if you chose to
create a serene scene to escape either visually or literally
take one thing at a time
expect the experience to bother you
seek professional help if your symptoms persist
seek medical assistance if your physical symptoms concern you

DONTs

drink alcohol excessively
use drugs or alcohol to numb consequences
withdraw from significant others
reduce leisure activities
increase caffeine intake
have unrealistic expectations for recovery
look for easy answers
take on new major projects
pretend everything is ok
make major changes if you don't need to

This information is not intended to serve as medical advice. If you experience physical symptoms which cause you concern, please consult your physician.

Call Your EAP

If you want to speak with someone about your experience, or if you would like a stress management consultation, contact your Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Federal or federalized employees can call 1-800-222-0364 (TTY 1-888-262-7848). The FOH EAP is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

..> ..>

A component of the U.S. Public Health Service

Department of Health and Human Services

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:37 AM

The Department of Health Strategy User Group
Category: Blogging

The Department of Health Strategy User Group -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->OR Nothing About Us Without Us

All services should include people with learning difficulties properly in everything they do. This is not just one person as a token but several people who can support each other.

This includes:

-->mstheme--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> ..> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> ..>
-->mstheme-->Government -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Health -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Employment -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Social services -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Housing -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Housing Associations -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Service purchasers -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Service providers -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->Inspection -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
-->mstheme-->And anyone else! -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->

All these people should sign up to say they are including people with learning difficulties properly and that they have proper support, they must agree with the belief that there is

Nothing About Us Without Us.' -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->Strategy follow up -->mstheme-->

A national learning difficulty advisory group should be set up with representatives from all over the country.

The user group contributions to the strategy should be looked at. How that was done and what affect it had. Making this better will help in the future.

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:36 AM

’Valuing People: A New Strategy for Learning Disability for the 21st Century
Category: Blogging

..> ..>

Other information -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->'Valuing People: A New Strategy for Learning Disability for the 21st Century.' -->mstheme-->

The Full White Paper.

Accessible version. Ref. 23587

Audio version on tape. Ref. 23592

Audio/digital C.D. Ref. 23594

-->mstheme-->'Nothing About Us Without Us'. -->mstheme-->

The Service Users Advisory Group report to the Government.

Accessible version. Ref. 23588

'Family Matters, Counting Us In' by Cally Ward.

-->mstheme-->Family Carers Report to the Government. -->mstheme-->

Full version. Ref. 23589

Accessible version. Ref. 23590

-->mstheme-->'Learning Difficulties and Ethnicity' by Waqar Ahmad. -->mstheme-->

Full version. Ref. 23593

Accessible version. Ref. 23591

-->mstheme-->www.doh.gov.uk/learningdisabilities -->mstheme-->

If you want more FREE copies of any of the above reports, please write to:

DoH publications

PO Box 777

London

SE1 6HX

Or Fax 01623 724 524

Or Email doh@prologistics.co.uk

Picture and Drawing credits.

Thanks must go to:

Change 0207 490 2668

and

People First 0207 713 6400

For permission to use their illustrations in this report.

-->mstheme-->

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Monday, November 12, 2007 2:34 AM

General issues
Category: Blogging

..> ..>

General issues -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->a) Labels -->mstheme-->

1) People don't like the old labels. They prefer learning difficulties if anything.

-->mstheme-->b) Information -->mstheme-->

1) People need better information about everything. Who does what. What people are entitled to? Who will do this?

2) Information needs to be accessible.

3) Self-advocacy groups can help publish this information. Groups can be contracted to do this.

4) This includes the strategy information; people with learning difficulties will need to be told about the strategy properly.

-->mstheme-->c) Charges -->mstheme-->

1) Charges are unfair and needs sorting out. Some people are charged lots when others are not charged at all.

2) People cannot be left below Income Support levels this is not a reasonable charge. Some social services are ignoring the guidance.

-->mstheme-->d) Money -->mstheme-->

1) People with learning difficulties need access to their own money. If other people are looking after it for them there needs to be clear rules as to how it is spent and who it is for.

-->mstheme-->e) Access -->mstheme-->

1) Access to all services and support for minority ethnic communities must be made equal.

-->mstheme-->f) Complaints -->mstheme-->

1) Complaints by people with learning difficulties must be taken seriously by anyone involved including all health and social services workers.

2) Complaints advocates should be available and listened to.

3) Information about complaints must be made available and accessible.

4) We saw that even having strong advocates does not mean valid complaints will be listened to. The complaints we heard about were not properly listened to until the issues were raised with the department and they asked for more information.

The social services department now have to review their procedures, but we do not know if the new ones will be any more successful. This information should go into the review of complaints.

-->mstheme-->g) Consent -->mstheme-->

1) Consent to any action needs to always be obtained if at all possible after it has been explained in every possible way.

2) National rules need to be drawn up if someone can't give their consent. The suggestions in Who Decides are not necessarily the best, they may take away decision making from some people and not show how people with learning difficulties can consent to contracts etc that are in their best interests e.g. to their own tenancies.

3) Who Decides does not provide enough safeguards for instance as to how money is spent or who has control. The proposals need to be looked at again.

-->mstheme-->h) Rights -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme--> ..> ..>

-->mstheme-->

1) The right to basics must be ensured. This includes:

-->mstheme--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> ..> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist-->..>

	-->mstheme-->Being able to go to self-advocacy groups. -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
	-->mstheme-->Being able to live in your own home if wished. -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->
	-->mstheme-->Being able to have support to go out when you wish, this includes everything from going to the disco to a funeral. -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->

-->mstheme--> -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->

-->mstheme--> -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> ..> -->msthemelist-->..>

-->mstheme-->Not to be bullied. Crimes are often committed against people with learning difficulties. These need to be recognised as such and not minimised as something else. -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->

-->mstheme--> -->mstheme-->

-->mstheme-->

-->mstheme--> -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist--> -->msthemelist--> ..> -->msthemelist-->..>

-->mstheme-->Crimes such as abuse need to get into court, people need proper legal protection, which is not always there at the moment. They also need to be properly supported in court, such as in the pilot project we heard about. -->mstheme--> -->msthemelist-->

-->mstheme-->

2) The Disability Rights Commission (DRC) and what it can do for people with learning difficulties needs to be properly advertised and explained.

3) New Human Rights legislation also needs to be properly advertised and explained to people with learning difficulties as a very important new law.

-->mstheme-->

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Tuesday, November 06, 2007 7:03 PM

Responding to Complaints When Admitting Fault
Category: MySpace

Responding to Complaints When Admitting Fault

Guidelines and Alternate Phrases

Focus immediately on any positive action you have taken to solve the problem.

We agree. You are totally correct, and we will pay for the damages to your garage shelves caused by our service personnel. Please forward the repair bills to my attention.

We have discussed your position with Sarah Rateson, the local manager, and she will be glad to replace the lamp if you will return it to the Willowbrook store.

We have now corrected the situation you mentioned in your July 7 letter.

Your letter arrived May 2, and we immediately went to work to correct the missing-authorization situation you detailed.

By the time you receive this response to your concern about the Fuhtii matter, you should have received our replacement shipment of tubing.

As soon as I got off the phone with you, I located Mr. Hytacci to investigate the situation you mentioned. As a result, we have already been able to verify the information you gave us and have corrected the misunderstanding about our clean-up schedule.

We have forwarded your letter about the performance of our spot remover to the distributor who sold you the product. As you may know, we have no control over how various merchants advertise the product, but we are definitely concerned about misleading our customers. I'll be in touch with you again after I've spoken to the distributor about ....

Your claim for expenses has been forwarded to me for handling; we have, therefore, enclosed our check for $478 to cover the cost of the damaged windows.

Acknowledge the complaint even if the corrective action must be delayed and turned over to another person for handling and follow-up.

We have spoken to our distributor in your area about the urgency of your situation, and he has assured us he will ship the new order by May 6.

Thank you for notifying us about the difficulty you have had with your storage space. We understand from Mr. Hank Ray you now have the correct combination to the lock and have immediate access to your stored items.

Indicate an approximate time for resolution if there will be a delay to your corrective response.

We will schedule the repair service as soon as we receive confirmation of the warranty. We have enclosed an envelope for your convenience.

Mark Hayes will call you on Monday to schedule a convenient delivery time.

Give a brief explanation of how the mistake happened or the situation occurred. An explanation adds credibility to your resolution; at least, the reader knows you have made the effort to investigate the problem. That in itself gives confidence about a resolution. And don't hesitate to give an honest admission of error when that's the case. Such honesty often diffuses the customer's anger more than excuses and vague platitudes about customer service. Similarly, if you have no reason for the problem, a frank admission to that effect usually disarms the reader.

I am indeed sorry that I missed the regional meeting. The honest-to-goodness truth is I had a spur-of-the-moment opportunity to go fishing off the Florida coast, and I hopped on a plane in that direction instead of yours. Will you allow me to make amends?

Unfortunately, I cannot blame even my excessive travel schedule for my delay in getting the questionnaire back to you. I sincerely apologize for my negligence and will phone next week to see if I can help you in any other way.

The information I gave you was understandably misleading. I should have been more clear about how the amount was actually calculated.

One of our secretaries inadvertently mislaid the forms in another customer's open file. We regret that error.

We simply did not follow through as we should have with repeated phone calls to make you aware of the possibility of severe weather conditions and possible delays.

Our investigators have completed their research and simply were unable to locate the items you reported missing. We're at a loss as to what could have happened to them. Nevertheless, we ....

Our team leader had an emergency personal situation develop late Thursday and rushed out of the office without remembering to tell anyone of the pending authorization. I'm sorry for the confusion.

We made a mistake, and we ask for your understanding.

You are correct; we did make an error in your last billing. The correct amount should have been $1489. We can either credit your account or send a refund check. Phone us at 344-9999 to let us know which you prefer.

Unfortunately, in our efforts to get the funds to you faster, we failed to take the time to verify the address against your latest payment coupon mailed to our Shreveport office.

Empathize with the reader about the difficulty or frustration of the situation. Avoid vague generalities; instead, add one or two statements that show the reader that you really understand the specific inconveniences involved.

I do know you have had to make four long-distance calls to our headquarters to get the matter corrected. May we reimburse you for these?

Certainly, you must have been disappointed in the delay and the missed deadline for your report.

You probably have been frustrated to no end, trying to find the appropriate person to address this concern!

Of course, this mistake has probably caused you several hours of rework, and I'm sure that increased your distress.

Can we in some way alleviate the burdensome chore of reviewing the employment paperwork that our error caused?

The malfunctioning doors must have created a major traffic jam during your peak customer hours.

I'm sure the two delays created frustration around your office for several days.

I regret your final report had to be delayed while we collected the correct data for you.

Be sure your tone and comments underscore to your reader that you value his or her goodwill.

In the event you have a recurrence of the problem, please feel free to phone me collect.

Thank you for your patience in dealing with this matter.

Please write me directly in the self-addressed, stamped envelope if I can do anything at all to alleviate the situation.

This service–or lack of it–is certainly not typical of our organization, and I sincerely hope you will give us a future opportunity to show you the true meaning of hospitality.

We will make every effort to ensure your next transaction with us is handled efficiently and courteously.

We want to assure you the next time you do business with us, we'll be eager to show you how much your business means to us.

We promise to make your next visit to our store an enjoyable one.

We are concerned that the poster insert created controversy. It was not our aim nor intent to offend any individual's moral viewpoint or sensitivities. Evidently, we unknowingly did so, and we apologize.

Avoid "fight" phrases (such as "you must assume" or "evidently, you were unaware" or "I'm sure you'll have to agree"). Readers don't like to be told what they know, feel, and must do. "Fight" words will tend to further alienate the reader already caught in a disappointing situation.

We have received your letter of concern (not complaint) about...

Apparently, I was unclear in (not you misconstrued) my response to you.

Mention any precautions you plan to take against a recurrence of the situation.

I plan to keep your number in my tickler file and will check with you periodically for the next few months to see how things are moving along.

I've made a calendar note to follow up with our sales rep again next week about your situation.

Please keep my direct number at hand should you have any further problems.

I've instructed my staff to clear all such procedures with me directly before they report to your site.

We have completely discarded the misleading set of procedures and have supplied our service people with the new set of instructions.

Be sincere. Don't use vague generalizations such as "We apologize for any inconvenience this has caused you." The reader wants assurance that you know exactly the kind of inconvenience the problem caused.

We greatly regret you were offended by the opening remarks; I can certainly understand your embarrassment in front of your former customers.

We know what an inconvenience the malfunctioning elevators must have been–particularly during the peak traffic hours.

We regret you had to make three long-distance calls to correct the situation. May we reimburse you for these?

Don't remind the reader again at the end of your letter or memo about the problem or disappointment. Instead, suggest that the matter has been corrected and that goodwill has been restored.

Assure the reader that you will guard against future mistakes. (Avoid guaranteeing that something will never happen again. Murphy's Law will make you a liar, and then the reader will be doubly disappointed.)

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Tuesday, November 06, 2007 7:01 PM

Requesting Referrals
Category: Blogging

Requesting Referrals

Guidelines and Alternate Phrases

Recall your past association with the reader, if necessary, such as a mutual friend or attendance at a convention.

Gerald Hines mentioned to me last week you might know of ...

After leaving Snyder's summer employment program more than two years ago, I've found plenty of opportunity to use the skills learned as an apprentice there. You were kind enough to let me observe you in your job for two weeks, and, as a result, I've carved out a sales position of my own here at Ibco.

I enjoyed our short airplane chat last week on the way to Los Angeles.

Outline briefly your services or products and the target customer or client.

Thank the reader for any referral he or she may have occasion to give and include any mutual benefit that you foresee.

If you have occasion to mention our company, we will greatly appreciate it.

Thank you in advance for any referrals that you might send our way.

We will appreciate your passing on this information to anyone you think could benefit.

If you have an opportunity to refer us to someone, we will very much appreciate your taking the time to do so.

If any of your acquaintances express an interest in our products or services, be sure to let them know of us. We will thank you.

Should any of your friends, family, or business associates mention interest along these lines, please let us know, and we will appreciate the opportunity to follow up with them.

Do you ever run across anyone in need of placement services? If so, I'll appreciate your giving them my name.

As I see it, you and I sell complementary products to the same customer. Seems to me that whichever of us gets to the customer first should suggest the next logical step in the set-up process. Can you envision a way we could construct a mutually beneficial referral arrangement?

Thank you for passing on any of my information to interested colleagues.

Do you think it would be to our mutual benefit to set up a formal arrangement for commission referrals?

I'll appreciate it if you can pass my name along to anyone who might be interested in this service, and I'll do the same for you.

I'd like to work out a mutually beneficial arrangement for referrals. Do you have suggestions?

I'll appreciate your referring to me anyone who needs such services.

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