'OLD' IS
>   WHEN...
> 
> Your sweetie says, 'Let's
>   go upstairs and make love,' and
>   you answer, 
>
> 'Pick one; I
>   can't do both!'

Not me yet thank good ness

>
>  'OLD' IS WHEN...
>
> Your friends
>   compliment you on your new
>   alligator shoes and you're
>   barefoot.
>
Cry this one is me
 
> 'OLD' IS
>   WHEN...
>
> A sexy babe catches your
>   fancy and your pacemaker opens the
>   garage door,

 Not me yet whew
 >
> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
>
> Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
>
this one is me


> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
>  
>
> You don't care where your spouse
>   goes, just as long as you don't
>   have to go along.

this one is so me
>
>
'OLD' IS WHEN...
>
> You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor
>   instead of by the police
>

this is me


> 'OLD' IS WHEN..
>  
>
> 'Getting a little action' means you don't need
> to take any
>   fibre today.

Not me yet>


> 'OLD' IS WHEN...
>
> 'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the
> parking lot.
>
Yep this one is me

 
> 'OLD' IS
>   WHEN...
> 
> An 'all nighter' means not
>   getting up to use the
>   bathroom.

>God this is so me, and I've not had an all niter in years
>
 AND
>
>  'OLD' IS WHEN...
>
> You are not sure
>   these are jokes?
>
Okay yep it's official I'm old. LOL

figured I'd share some funnies.

It is sooo HOT…

.....the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

......the trees are whistling for the dogs.

.....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

.....hot water now comes out of both taps.

.....you can make sun tea instantly.

.....you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.

......the temperature drops below 95 F (35 C) and you feel a little chilly.

.....you discover that in August it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.

.....you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.

.....you actually burn your hand opening the car door.

.....you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.

.....your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, 'What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?'

.....you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

.....the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter.

.....the cows are giving evaporated milk.

.....farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

 

 

But on the other hand, if they are

dems, you could get the death

penalty.  What the hell...you are

going to die anyway.

Coqueto did a great blog where he wrote himself a letter 20 years back.

I had a question for that, would the you 20 years ago have listened?
I'm pretty sure 20-30 years ago I knew it all, I didn't need some futuristic me telling me how it was going to be.
I knew where my life was going, I was going to be famous. Famous singer, or actor.
I'm a famous singer to my friends and family, and I act out great funny little plays for my daughter and the dog.
Luckily I can still sing pretty well, although nothing like I could or did 20 years ago.
Then I was going to become a famous chef, Well at least most people like my cooking.
Then a teacher for special education children. not enough money and I'm not cut out for schools that require you to memorize things.
Then a mortician, Again not enough money for school.
Now I'm down to my last possible dream, my books.
There are alot of reasons for me that I want the books to do even a little well.
Of course it would be nice to be famous as say charliane harris, stephen king, anita blake, etc....
But to be able to have the books in print, and to take them to my 6th grade english teacher and tell her, "now what?".
To be able to tell most of the people in my life to go screw themselves that would be so nice.
I've been a caged bird for a long time, I don't want to die in a cage, I'd like to die free.
One of these days I'm going to sit down and write down stuff I've held in for a long time, although when I do this it will be when I've figured out how to let some people see it and others not.
If anyone knows how to do that please msg me.
I don't think I'd listen to the new me, she is too bitter, and tired, to scared, to worried, to panic stricken all the time.
And I'd know that to change one thing in your life changes it all.
So even with all the hell I've been thru and will continue to go thru, I'd not change a thing, I'm me, and I'm okay most days, and the others luckily I don't remember too well.
/hugz to you and yours from me and mine.
Laura

Do you know how when you were little you would fight taking a nap, tooth and nail.
And when you got a little older you wished someone would force you to go take a nap.
Or not wanting to eat your veggies, but as you got older you were happy as heck to eat them, if they were prepared the way you liked em.
Fighting off hugz and kisses from mom, dad, grandma, grandpa. And then you have days you would give a gazillion dollars for just one hug or kiss from them, especially if you live far away or if they are no longer with us.
I'm having a **relatively perfectly boring day** I remember being younger and rolling my eyes and sighing at my mom, telling her how bored I was, and not realizing that when I got older I'd give anything for a relativly boring old day.
Well I got my wish.
So I'd like to know from ya'll what types of things did you want or not want when you were a kid that you wish you had or didn't have now?
Sorry for the typo's etc.. my hands are working this week.
/hugz to you and yours from me and mine.
Laura

The 7th person on my friends list is an old friend of mine Jennifer. she had a baby last week, and so there is a picture of her beautiful baby instead of her pretty little face on there.
**Please send her cong a ratz**
I knew her baby would be pretty, cause her and her hubby are pretty. Although I should have been worried cause my grandma used to say, " pretty people make ugly babies and ugly people make pretty babies."

I've had my babies, and because of my age, health issues and the fact that I was fixed, I won't have anymore babies. But that still doesn't stop the ohh I want another one everytime I see a new one.

I wonder if I'm the only lady who gets this way or if it's an instinct thing, has nature designed us to want babies evertime we see one?
Only you ladies can answer this one.

I also wanna know what it is that makes men turn to complete mush the second they get a baby?
I've seen some of the biggest, butchest men in the world, scary type dudes turn to complete blubberying babies once they get one of thier own.
 
Also I'd like to dispell a myth here, I'd always heard that girl children bonded with dads and boy children bonded with mom's.
I'm here to tell everyone my daughter is a total momma's girl, don't get me wrong she loves her father and her dad's but I'm the one she clings too.

Also is it just me or have baby clothes gotten cuter but more expensive over the past ten years? I know everything is more expensive now, but really why should baby shoes that are so tiny and use so little material be 20+ dollars a pair, it ain't like they are going to be in them that long. lol.
so that is the end of my baby blog so fess up with your stuffs that you know.
/hugz to you from me and mine
Laura

Yep, you heard me No Blog today, I know sorry to disappoint you.
 No blog about how misserable I am,
or how upset someone has made me.
No lines about how my kid is the smartest, sweetest, most wonderful child that was ever created.
No telling you how this or that is the best thing ever.
Nope today ya'll get to blog.
I know you have it in you.
I'm tired of logging on here and finding nothing to read,
So the spotlight is turned on you, I wanna see your blogs.
Surprise me, amaze me, I'm waiting.
/hugz to you and you from me and mine.

As many of ya'll know I've been on facebook almost 4 years now.

I have got to have many great friendships on here that I treasure as much as if I knew ya'll in real life.
We have laughed together, cried together, shared joys, children, puppies, kittens, divorce, marriage. etc..
When I have felt like the world is at it's darkest point, tada, ya'll are there to lift me up and tell me it's all going to get better, or to hang in there.
Well I go over to facebook, because a long lost family member happened to invite me.
And what do I find, my mom (birth mother) and my sister ( who I asked santa clause for)
Over there. I see their lives, I see pictures and barely recognize them, why?
Because I've only seen them 1 time in over 6 years.
Hell I"m pretty sure I've talked to my sister maybe 20 times in that time.
And no matter how many friends I accumulate or how many fans of the books it still hurts like hell.

Because it makes you start to doubt yourself, it makes you wonder if I'm not good enough for them, then how can I be good enough for anyone else.
If they can't except me for me, then how can anyone else in the world.
I've never asked them for anything.
**Mostly because I know the answer would be no***

But I sit and look at the lives they have led and wonder why it was that there was never room for me in them.
I have always tried to be the one who tells them go for it, do whatever makes you happy.

But as I get older it seems to hurt more then it did in years past. I think because I do realize how short our time on earth is.
And it feels like even if they had  a date of our demise that they would rather spend it somewhere else then with me.
I believe more and more that you get your birth family and then God says, " ohh here I forgot these people" and you meet them along the way, friends that are as close as family. People who care about you even more then your own flesh and blood.
So I try and console myself with the fact that I am sourounded by people who at the drop of a hat would figure out a way to find me if I was in real trouble, or would offer up body parts if I needed them.

I try very hard no matter how I'm feeling to call my mom at least once a week, and I try to only tell her the good news because I don't want her to worry, being a mom I now know the worry that we get to have over our children.

Or worse I always worry that if I tell my mom the bad stuff she will blame me for it and tell me if I'd only done this or that I'd not be in the pickle I'm in now or some such stuff.

I've spent my life making mistakes and trying very hard to learn from them and not make them again.
I thought I'd come to a point that my family couldn't hurt me anymore.
I guess I was wrong on that point too.

/hugz to you and yours from me and mine
Laura

Lately since I"ve been having to get my daughter off to school, I've been getting up pretty early in the morning.

I did not do that this summer, most my time was spent on the computer or playing with my kiddo.

But now I get to see the sunrise **hiss hiss** and enjoy the sounds of the birds **puts in earplugs**

My mom used to wake us up with, " the sun is shining the birds are singing" I would tell her to get me my shades and a shotgun. lol

But as I get older despite aches and pains I still charish every morning I get to spend with my family and friends.

I would like to let everyone know who still reads me and comments that starting this week the process of getting the books published, edited, and printed is going into overdrive.
Way to many Vampire related things out there that aren't even close to ours. So figured what the hell jump on the bankwagon.

So if you have trouble finding the books on here just let me know and I'll figure out a way to get ya to where you can read them or I'll just reprint them here for you.

A word of caution tho they have very very graphic sexual and violence themes in them, so be prepared.

/hugz to you and yours from me and mine
Laura