How does one battle loneliness?

How do you let go of emptiness?

You can't throw an angry fist,

When there's nobody there to witness it.

Smoke through a pack,

In a single night,

Inhalation distracts,

Sadness holding tight,

Sit and stare,

At the screen for hours,

Let the music blare,

Turn up the volume full power,

Go for a walk,

Through the neighborhood,

Close your eyes, breathe, and stop,

Try to focus on the good,

Talk to a buddy,

Miles away,

And once you hang up,

Your heart decays...

Into loneliness, the strongest of all of foes,

The bringer and bearer of the saddest of woes,

It claws into my heart making my chest feel tense,

It would all go away with any one person's presence.

   Skydiving is amazing.
   I jumped from 13,000 feet. I was so nervous right before the door was opened. A small part of me wanted to back out, but a bigger part wanted to go through with it.
When they did open the door, everybody was out quickly. You pretty much have 5-10 seconds to back out, but you're right there. Able to experience this wonder.
   We waddled to the door, Sebree, my cute, foreign tandem, attached at my back. I tilted my head back, as directed, with my goggles on, and closed my eyes as we slowly fell forward, out of the plane.
   I grasped my shoulder straps as tight as I could, and screamed, not even able to hear the sound of it over the rushing wind as we plummeted down through the atmosphere.
When I opened my eyes, my adrenaline was rushing full force. My breaths were frantic and deep. We were warned that we might feel as though we couldn't breathe, but it usually meant you were holding your breath unintentionally.
   So, I breathed. I breathed as I never have before. These were not soft or slow, they were quick, deep, and filled with raw, sober emotion.
   First with fear. Then a pleasant, and once again, overwhelming excitement, and then acceptance and pure appreciation for the experience.
   It took forever for Sebree to open the parachute, or so it felt. Though I could have free-fallen forever if I had no physical barriers approaching at 120 mph.
   When the parachute opened, it wasn't nearly as abrupt as I had expected. It was a soft jerk upwards, and as it leveled out and we started to descend gracefully, Sebree and I shared a pleasant conversation.
   The landing was smooth. He gave me a hug, and I thanked him over and over again. I wanted to give him a gift so bad for sharing the experience with me, and for being an excellent teacher.
   I will always have such an incredible appreciation for him. He helped and guided me through the most exhilarating and dangerous experience of my life.

   Sky diving is amazing. I will never forget how I felt, and I will be doing it again as soon as I come up with the money. And it taught me that I am human, and I can do incredible things. What's next? Bungee jumping? Hang gliding? Hot air balloons?

We'll just have to see.

Bobbi rolled out of bed one night. She hopped on her brother's computer, and decided to give her buddies, and future past-reflecting self, an idea of what's going on in her life. Here it is.

Sorry for kind of disappearing off of the planet. My Redding friends know what I'm talking about. But, I didn't have time to call everyone and fill them in. My apologies! I'll be back in Redding this weekend.

I've been working [me? working? omfgapocolypse!] to save up for traveling! And guess what - I've saved up enough to actually move. And get out of here. But, not yet. I'm going to work on saving up a bit more, so I can travel a little more comfortably.

Actually.. I'm super proud of myself right now. It's about time I have a drive to DO something with my life, and huzzah for stepping up and saying "No Babs, don't spend this paycheck." And I'm thankful for awesome, amazing people who have greatly impacted my life, and totally changed the course of life for Bobbi Ashworth forever! If you keep positive, positive things seem to come and find you if you're patient enough. I've been very patient with myself and my lack of motivation, and very fortunate.

So, where should I travel next year? Any suggestions?

A place with a totally different culture. Outside of the USA. Where people come in abundance, and a smile on their faces. =)

Oh yes, please, please, please.