I was one windy mofo:
http://writingshift.com/3/denissheehan

Cheers,
denis

Happiness is drinking in a darkened, maybe windowless, pub emerging several hours later to the welcoming sun and feeling its warmth on your now fuzzy head.
  It is Friday. 

The Pity Whores are a pop punk band out of Foxboro , MA . Dave Blais, who has reviewed a few CDs for Askew Reviews, plays in The Pity Whores. What’s the point, you ask? Well, The Pity Whores are playing The Jerry Springer Show on May 20 so be sure to tune in for some white knucklin' fun. Yes, The Jerry Springer Show. Here's a lil' piece about it in The Boston Globe (one of the world's worst newspapers). I can think of no great honor, honestly. Playing the Springer Show I mean, not being mentioned in The Boston Globe....I really liked The Wrestler...It just seems right and ok when an ugly person cheats on an ugly person with another ugly person...One of my favorite bands, Even in Blackouts, has called it quits, but also released a new CD. I've ordered mine and eagerly await its arrival...There's nothing more tragic than a listless kitchen floor...Imagine if humans never stopped growing and the only we we died was when we reached the earth's atmosphere and burned our heads off...I've decided to spend more time on coming up with a new letter or two for the English alphabet...Sometimes it's easy to know when to personally pull the plug on a television show, other times it's not so easy...I don't think many people would tuck in their bed sheets if the bottom of mattresses were made out of razor blades.
   It is now time for you to go do whatever it is you do that puts a smile on that forked up face of yours: drink, read, music, writing, masturbating in the mirror while screaming your mother's name, eating, cutting your arm to allow today's pain to freely flow, purge, or going here to buy my book. For it is Friday.

Even though they are allowing me in, all the cool people will be in Jamaica Plain, ..MA.. ..tomorrow at 4 to see Chanticlear / Jonee Earthquake Band / The McGunks / Kermit’s Finger / The Paraplegics at The Midway. $5/all ages. You'll be out by 8 and well primed for the rest of your debauchery filled night... I just finished watching the fine HBO series Deadwood and really think Richardson deserves his own mini series, if not exclusive show...Many of the bits in this season's Family Guy episodes are running way too long, so I think, anyway...I recently received a pornographic move to review titled, "Cougars 2." The female cast are aged in their early thirties with one being thirty-nine. God...There is nothing funnier than a person flippin' the bird to something nonhuman... Instead of "an apple a day keeps the doctor away," it would be better if "a cheeseburger a day keeps the doctor away" was the rule...It has arrived and the time is now. Forget it all and live. The weekend is a nonjudgmental beast. It is our duty to rape it and leave it for dead. Along with its rebirth in seven days, it will forgive and forget.

Deadline for Askew Reviews 14 is May 15, 2009.
Please do not submit material previously published anywhere, print or online.
Feel free to query first: denis@askewreviews.com
Columns- can be about anything. 2000 or so word count max. Will appear in print only.
<250 Flash- fiction or nonfiction, but not more than 250 words. Will appear in print only.
Book Reviews- we love small press books, but will consider anything (email for guidelines).
DVD Reviews- independent, grindhouse, and b-movie fare are best.  (email for guidelines).
CD Reviews- music must fall within the punk genre. No major labels (email for guidelines).
Pay = $0, but you will receive a comp copy of 14.
Note: Due to the insane amount of email received, please be sure to put “Submission” in your email’s subject line.
I Love You,
Denis

Askew writer Mighty Ben Hunter was once in a band, The Medveds. Their last release was almost 9 years ago. They broke up shortly after. Now, they have a website as they prepare to release another CD: www.themedveds.com

 Askew Reviews  is looking for a few new faces to review DVDs. Please look over our site to see what type of crap we cover.
  If yer looking to review Tom Cruise’s latest or the upcoming Transformers movie, you’ll be disappointed. Instead, you’ll get old fare grindhouse erotica, horror, and other low budget/independent releases.
  There is no pay.
  If interested, please send a very brief bio and samples/links to samples of reviews you’ve written.
  Cheers,
  Denis
  denis@askewreviews.com

Ok then, I'll type it again since you did not get it the first time around:
Piss off already, it's Friday.