chris's MySpace Blog |

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Sunday, August 10, 2008

TWSS two fer...

Location: Moon and Sixpence, Sat night.

Scenario: I was with a big, random group of people that were celebrating Arin's birthday. We had just switched tables to accomodate the large group that we had acquired. Our previous table was one picinic table. The table we moved to were two picinic tables pushed together. I guess the two tables weren't as large as they looked from afar, because someone said, "It's not as big as I thought it would be." I very quickly made eyes with Anglea and said, "That's what she said." She agreed, then within one minute she said, as she was trying to navigate the various two by fours on the picinic table, "There's no way I'm mounting that." We both cracked up and we both said what we were both thinking, which was....... "That's what she said."

Too Much TWSSing,

paulsen

7:09 PM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Recycled TWSS....

Date: Last week. Wednesday.

Where: The red room, Roadside Attraction.

Scenario: I ordered another round for Ellen and I. The previous trip took about fifteen minutes. This trip took about two or three. When I got back to the table Ellen remarked "Already?" That, or she said "That was quick". I know it was either one of those situations, but I don't remember exactly. I know it was a situation that I'd seen before, and commented on. I replied, "That's what she said." I feel confident that it was a justified remark.

TWSSing,

paulsen

8:01 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Saturday, July 26, 2008

plaid bermuda shorts...

My latest purchase, in an ongoing attempt to live my life more functionally, was a pair of plaid bermuda shorts. The same ones all the kids are wearing these days. The same ones that can be found in the young mens department at Mervyn's. I'll admit I kind of feel like an asshole wearing them, but I find them to be so comfortable that any shame I feel wearing them in public is diminished because of the comfort. They also came in really handy at the airport. I was saved the indignity of taking off a belt in the security line because the shorts have a built-in drawstring. Taking off my belt in the security line is fine, it's the putting back on part that's embarrassing for me. When I put my belt on I usually need to pin the bottom of my shirt under my chin to allow for visual access to the belt loops. Doing this alone in my house is fine, but in the security line it's not such a pretty sight. So while I was at the airport recently, wearing my plaid bermuda shorts, I went to buy a magazine for the flight. I was disturbed to find out that I couldn't find a magazine that interested me. I opted for Rolling Stone. It seems like I should have some sort of hobby or interest that's reflected in the magazine world. It got me thinking about my interests in life. I've discovered recently that I like trees. Didn't see any magazines about trees. I also like clay, which is represented in the magazine world but not offered at the airport. I like building shitty structures in my backyard. I guess that's represented by Dwell, but not at the airport. The magazine rack made me feel like I should be interested in biking, my health, music, trucks, celebrities, girl stuff, scinece, politics, and gardening. So I'm going to try and find a hobby that doesn't include clay, building shit, or boring people with tree facts. I think I'll start by taking a bike ride tonight. But first I have to go to Lowes and get some plumbing material for my kitchen.

Friday Night Blogs,

paulsen

2:44 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Saturday, June 07, 2008

TWSS...

Location: At work. Polychrome department.

Scenario: The previous day I recieved a shipment of badass bamboo brushes (BBB). I went to Plaster's polychrome department to stash the brushes because I don't trust the people that work in my neck of the woods. I told Plaster how excited I was to have all these new brushes to play with. Later that day I was ready to start playing with my new brushes, so I walked into the polychrome department to retrieve my stash. Plaster saw what I was up to and simply asked, "Already?". As I scampered back to my area with my stash of BBB I replied, "That's what she said."

Friday Night Blogs,

paulsen

1:32 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Monday, April 28, 2008

APB...

This was stolen from my backyard sometime in the last two months. If anyone has any information as to where this piece is I'd like to know. And I'd prefer to keep it on the down low so I can conduct surveliance on the perp and steal a piece of their property for bartering purposes. That, or conduct surveliance on the people in their lives, then figure out a way to infiltrate that person's life. From that point I'll befriend or become a lover to the associate, only to turn the tables at a later point. I'd prefer this option, so just alert me to the perp and I'll take it from there. Then I'll blog about it. It'll be awesome.

Someone Stole A Ceramic Head From Me,

paulsen

8:15 AM

(Add Comment) |

1 Kudos

Monday, April 28, 2008

Most Recent Censored TWSS....

When: Last friday.

Where: At work.

Scenario: I was heading back to the HR office to turn in my parking permit application. On the way to the HR office I ran into the HR lady. I showed her the application and tried to give it to her. She smiled and said, "you can just stick it in my box, Chris." I smirked and thought to myself, "That's what she said."

I Love TWSS,

paulsen

8:07 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Monday, April 28, 2008

Return of What is This? part two....

I Think I May Have The New Format Figured Out,

paulsen

8:01 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Monday, April 28, 2008

Return of What is This? part one.....

I Might Be Back In Business,

paulsen

6:58 AM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Frustrating....

Myspace is just plain not working for me lately. Everytime I try to post a blog I encounter some sort of bullshit. Just a moment ago I spent twenty minutes drafting a blog bemoaning how ineffective myspace has become. When I clicked the "post blog" button the whole thing disappeared. Earlier I tried posting some photos to no avail. I have a whole arsenal of "what is this" photos, new glasses photos, new shoes photos, and a photo of my favorite tree in Portland. Of course, I wasn't able to upload any of these to my blog because myspace completely sucks balls. Perhaps if myspace were to spend more time fixing shit and less time alerting the world when someone changes their profile song things would run a little smoother around here. Maybe I'll try to put the pictures up later this week or something. In the meantime, in honor of the NBA playoffs tipping off, I'll be making 40 ceramic heads in 40 nights. I'll be doing that, and I'll continue to plot a way to open up a sandwich shop where I can sell sandwiches and ceramic heads.

Myspace Bothers Me (MBM),

paulsen

9:59 PM

(Add Comment) |

0 Kudos