Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 22
Sign: Capricorn
City: BIXBY
State: Oklahoma
Country: US
Signup Date: 6/1/2005
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Monday, May 18, 2009
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I just read the saddest thing I have ever read. Meg's friend Sarah's dad just died. She wrote a note about how great he was. The great memories. And how she doesn't feel like she really got to tell him she loved him. I don't want that to happen. I don't want to lose someone and have them not know how much I love them. You guys mean a lot to me, and I don't want you to forget it. I fuck up a lot. If you know me, you know that. If I do something to really upset or offend you, I want you to know that I am very sorry. I do not ever want to hurt anyone. I just don't know how to react to things a lot of the time. I have never meant anything bad towards anyone. Honestly. I have been upset about things before, and I have thought bad things about people, but I have never wanted to upset or hurt anyone, or have anything bad happen to anyone. I am going to make some notes to some people I love. If you are not on here, I am very sorry. Please do not get offended. If I ever do anything to upset you, I really want you to come read what I have written about you. Because it is how I will always feel, no matter how mad I am at what you have done, or how stupid I am acting.
Meg - You are my world. I will always love you more than anyone. You could never begin to imagine how much I love you. You have stuck with me through my worst times. I have treated you so horribly. I have done and said such terrible things. But you have always been there for me. I have hurt you so much. I am so incredibly sorry for it. I know I was wrong, but I did it all because I love you so much. I wanted you at all times. And I did and said stupid, hurtful things to get that. If I could have one wish it would be to go back to this time last year and fix everything. I know everything in my life would be better if I could. I would have a better job, I would probably be going to school, everything would be so much happier. You always listen to me. You will listen to me talk about things you do not care about at all. You have introduced me to so many things I love so much. As cliche as it is, you have always been my rock. I know I can always talk to you. I know you will always be there. You are so much better than you think you are. You are so much more than you pretend to be. I wish you would realise that. I want you to be who you should be. I want you to be the person you really want to be. Stop thinking you are stupid and ugly and talentless. You are the greatest person I have ever met. I love you. I will always be here for you. Forever.
Nikki - I miss you so much. You were the best friend I ever had. I love the times we had before I became a terrible friend. I want to repair this. I want you back. You were the first person to ever buy me something just because you were thinking of me. You bought me a record player, a Hogwarts bag, books, an amazing wand, Ikea things, so many things. You gave me great advice for my relationship problems, and I am so sorry I didn't take it. I'm sorry to myself, but mostly to you. You tried to help me, because you loved me. And I was so stubborn, I didn't think it was worth it to do any of that. It was rude to you. I have learned so much from you, about everything. I've learned how to be a better nerd, I have learned about being a partner to someone, I have learned how to knit, and just living in general. You have taught me more about how to live than my parents have. You are like my big sister. I love you so much. It's really hard for me to think of exactly what to say about you. You are just so wonderful. You are so much fun, and you are SO smart, and you are the second coolest person I know. Your husband is number one. Only because he's a rock star. I am always here for you if you need anything at all. I will try my best to help you in any way I can, with whatever you need. Whether it be talking, giving you a ride somewhere, helping with money (once I get some myself), keeping you company, giving input on a project, helping with house work... I think you get the point. My phone is always right next to me. The only time it is not is if I am in the bathroom or if I walk to the kitchen. So if I don't answer right away, the longest it would be is about 20 minutes, if I'm in the shower. So call me if there is anything at all I can do to make you happier.
Zack - I think you are finally getting what you deserve. You have always been such a wonderful person. You've always been exactly who you wanted to be. You have always been a proud nerd. You never did anything that would make me lose respect for you. You deserve someone who will treat you like a prince, and I think you've found her. I know it sucked waiting so long, but the wait is over. You've found someone who is just right for you. We have been friends for ten years. Those first few years were so much fun. I miss the matches we made up with our figurines. The ultimate Val Venis vs. Sabu match, tables wrapped in barbed wire, Knex Hell in a Cell. There is no question I would not be who I am today without you. You introduced me to Final Fantasy, which made me see that nerds are freaking cool. Now I don't do anything that's NOT nerdy. You really are like my brother, and I love you.
I think I should go to bed now, so I will write more on this later.
 | Currently listening: Spirit Trail By Bruce Hornsby Release date: 1998-10-13 |
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Saturday, March 07, 2009
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I think we need to sit down and have a meeting. Things have not been going smoothly, and it's really upsetting me. I just want to go have fun playing the game, but it always ends up in arguments, and nothing ever gets done. Last night, we played for almost five hours and we moved about 80 feet through a cave, fought a few octurtles, and went maybe fifty feet down a river. To me, that is not acceptable.
For one, I think we need to have like an hour before we start playing to just sit around and talk. We can tell each other all the things we have wanted to tell for a week, get some silly things out of the way. Then we can really sit down and play.
Everyone needs to really know their character. Know exactly what your powers do. If your power dazes or blinds the enemy, know exactly what daze and blind does. Write everything down on your power card, so you don't have to go looking around your sheet to figure out how much you add to each attack. Don't write "str plus this and this and this" add up your strength and everything else you will be adding to this attach, and write down that number. Whenever I use my bow I add 5 for my dex, 3 for half-level, and 2 for proficiency. So every one of my cards says "+10 vs. AC" for my attack. It just makes things go so much faster.
I would like everyone to read through the skill section of the player's handbook. Things have changed since past editions. You don't have to know all the exact numbers (unless you are Joey, then it would be a good idea to know those things) but at least know what you can do with your skill and have an idea of what you might need to roll to do it.
If there is a rule we don't like, we need to talk about it and decide as a group to change it. If we don't like how you divide by five to find out how far you can jump and we want to just set a certain DC for that, then we should talk about it and decide as a group to change that.
I think if we really know what we are doing, things will run more smoothly and we will actually get more done.
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Thursday, January 22, 2009
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This is an email my manager sent to everyone a few months ago. Nothing in this has been changed; it is exactly how she sent it.
I,HANNAH,& HOLLY HAVE FINISH THE NEW RACK PLAN IN WOMENS,KIDS &MENS.DO NOT MESS IT UP!!!!!!!! THEIR WILL BE NO MORE YOU FIX IT IF YOU MESS IT UP.THEIR ARE GOING TO BE WRITE UPS! IF YOU DO NOT KNOW THE RACK PLAN IT"S INSIDE THE INFO SOURCE BLINDER OR ASK MYSELF OR ANOTHER ASSOCIATE THAT IS WORKING WITH YOU!!! THEIR WILL KNOW BE ASSIGN ASILES AT NIGHT , SO I CAN KNOW WHO IS DOING WHAT.ALSO ALL CLEARANCE HAVE BEEN BROUGHT DOWN TO THE VERY BOTTOM 3 ROWS IN WOMENS&KIDS.YOU HAVE ALL DONE SHARE LABOR AND SAW WHAT THE OTHER STORES LOOK LIKE , [ LET'S KEEP THIS STORE IN GOOD STANDARD!!!!!!!!!!!
MANAGER!!!!!
That is what I deal with at work. And she doesn't speak any better.
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Sunday, September 28, 2008
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When you really have no one to talk to and not talking is destroying your life?
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Saturday, August 23, 2008
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Lava lamp. It's purple and works perfectly. And I think I have an extra light bulb for it.
Naruto trading cards. I have a ton of these. I don't have a full set, but it's very close. I will give them to you, and you could probably sell them to Vintage Stock.
Alarm clock. Plugs in and can take a 9volt battery. It makes that lovely annoying as fuck sound.
Naruto night light. It has the symbol for the leaf village. I have only used it for like five minutes, when I first got it.
CD tower. It's metal. I think it holds like 60 or 80 CDs.
Coloured pencils. I have two packs. Quite a few pencils there.
Computer. Not very great. 32mb of RAM. 13g hard drive. Windows ME. That's pretty much it.
Desk. It's rather large. I'll get measurements and a picture soon.
Table. I think it's a TV stand. It has two doors and a little space to put a DVD player or VCR. I will get measurements and a picture soon.
Records. I haven't looked through them yet. I will have a list soon.
Live CDs. I have a whooooooole lot of live shows burned to CD. Most of them are Grateful Dead. Also moe., a few Les Claypool, Ratdog, My Morning Jacket, Dave Matthews. I'll get a better list soon.
That's all right now. I will probably have more stuff soon.
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Saturday, February 23, 2008
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Step 1:Put your iPod or equivalent on shuffle. Step 2:Post the first line from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing. Step 3:You reply and guess songs... Step 4:I will bold the lyrics when someone guesses it correctly. Step 5:Looking them up on google or any other search engine is CHEATING!
1. If you wanna go, and leave your man. 2. You got me inside and outside, everywhere in between. (Only like four of my friends have even heard this song.) 3. You can shine your shoes and wear a suit. 4. When I grow up I'm gonna be a star, gonna sing my songs and play my guitar. 5. Are you such a dreamer to put the world to rights? 6. I've got a feeling, a feeling deep inside, oh yeah. 7. The breath of the morning, I keep forgetting. 8. Dropped acid, Blue Oyster Cult concert, fourteen years old. 9. Girl, you taught me how to hurt real bad, and cry myself to sleep. 10. When I woke up you were gone, and the sun was on the lawn. 11. It's coming through the air for all of us to hear. 12. First the mic, then a half cigarette. 13. Stone love, she kneels before the grave. 14. There was a little falter at the alter of confession. 15. Powered up the city, hydro-electric juice. 16. On the day that she was buried, her daddy stood out by the cemetery fence. 17. I want a love that's right; right is only half of what's wrong. 18. My heart is empty, your eyes are dull. 19. By the light of the lamp I sit to type my notes on tab at my side. 20. She thinks of John Travolta on the same day as me. 21. Wake up, it's time; we need to find a better place to hide. 22. Once again, I'm in trouble with my only friend. 23. Side of the road I stop and pick up the pieces of your car. 24. When the men take me to the devil tree, I will be free and shining like before. 25. Hello walls, how'd things go for you today?
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Monday, October 08, 2007
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1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Have we ever had sex?
33. Do you miss me?
34. Do you think i miss you?
35. Are you going to put this on your MYSPACE and see what I say about you?
 | Currently listening: No Control By Bad Religion Release date: 11 December, 1989 |
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Monday, July 09, 2007
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First off, I'm going to finish Gilmore Girls again, then hold off on it for a long time. I just keep going back to watch it, and I can't do anything else. But right now, Mallory has all my DVDs except season six, which I am currently watching. So when I finish it, I'll give it to her, and she can keep them all for a while so I CAN'T watch them.
Read other books. I need, and really want, to finish Eldest. It's really really good, but I'm just too focused on Harry Potter right now. I also want to read all of Jane Austen's novels, and all of Shakespears plays, at least the comedies. And the rest of the Oz series, since I've only read the Wizard of Oz.
Get Netflix again and start watching the 180 movies I have on my list. I'd like to have like a movie night once a week with some people, but I don't think anyone would want to.
Build a desk. I should have the money in no time, I just don't really have the time right now. But I need to do it in the next month because Sam will be leaving.
Finish touching up my room. I did the window area and put up new blinds, but I still need to do all the baseboards, both doors, and a few touch ups around the ceiling.
Get a juicer and Magic Bullet. I'm also going to get a few more supplements and stuff so that I can do this three-day juice fast thing. I really need it. And once I get a juicer, I'm going to go to Wild Oats like once a week to get lots of fresh fruit so I'll drink lots of juice.
Risk buying the Sims 2 so I can maybe play it if it works. I borrowed it from Niki once but my computer decided the game was stupid and wouldn't run it. I freaking love the Sims, and I've wanted to play the Sims 2 for a really long time. I played it a little on Joey's computer once, and it's really fun. I already have a huge list of names for a bunch of Sims.
Play WoW again. The main reason I'm not playing now is because none of my friends are playing. Which makes it really boring. But after the party, Nikki is going to start playing again, and hopefully Brad too, so I can finally start playing again.
Start playing tennis. I need people to play with me though.
Make stuff again. Nikki is going to teach me how to knit, so I can start doing that, and crocheting, so I can make lots of stuff for people. Since right now I can only make a hat.
And the main thing I'm going to do is be able to buy just random stuff. I haven't been able to buy certain things I want for a while, because I was going to save money for school, then I had to save money for other stuff, but now I don't have anything I really need money for. So I can buy a new TV, and start saving for a new computer, and a Wii, and an Xbox 360.
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Monday, April 23, 2007
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I'm just going to start by saying that there is never any reason to be rude to someone who sells you something. It's almost never their fault if something goes wrong with it. People make mistakes, and machines make just as many, if not more. A lot of times when my mom gets food from Taco Bueno, they mess up the order. My mom doesn't go and scream at them because they accidentally didn't put a taco in. Or last week when she got me some burritos and nachos. The nacho cheese spilled out all over the bag. So I didn't get to eat any nachos, and the burrito wrappers were all covered in cheese. We cleaned it up and moved on. Because it's not a big deal. I spent $23 on a Naruto headband, and when I got to my car, I found out that it was really bad quality. I didn't go back inside and yell at the girl who sold it to me (one reason, because she was really really cute). I just took it and moved on. I have, many times in the past, paid a price for something other than what it was marked, and not gotten discounts when I was supposed to. I just let it go. Saving a few dollars doesn't mean anything in the long-run.
I'm pretty sure I'm never going to get married, and I'm just going to be the spinster in town. No girls ever like me more than a friend, and if they do, it never lasts more than a few weeks. I hate having crushes, because they never end up going anywhere. I wish I could just forget about it, and just accept that I'm never getting married.
I really wish they would ship the stuff I bought on Wednesday night. The person was notified to pick it up on Thursday morning, meaning he or she had three days to do that. Still nothing. It's just annoying when you check the status and it's just sitting there.
So I'm starting to think we're never going to actually play Dungeons and Dragons. We're just going to spend all of our time talking about it, because our Dungeon Master won't ever set up a dungeon. Sorry, Niki, it's nothing against you. I'm just saying, since Zakk works all the time now, we only have select days we can actually play, so it would be good to have it all ready so we could play at those times. Last night would have been perfect. I just get kind of sick of waiting around when we've been ready to play for weeks. We just keep buying more and more stuff, and it never gets used.
People need to learn that their opinion isn't law. I'm really glad that you have your own opinion, and you don't just move with the herd. But I have my own opinion too. I have no problem with you voicing your opinion, just stop trying to make me feel like my opinion is completely wrong.
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Friday, April 06, 2007
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This is probably going to be really big and long. But it would make me feel a bit better if you read it.
So I was watching the latest George Carlin special last night, the one Michael, Warren, and I went to see. He was talking about all the stuff people do, to themselves and each other. And I guess I had just never really taken enough time to really think about it. And people are SO fucked up. One thing he said was something like "rats do disgusting things, but they would never fuck a dead rat." No other animal kills for sport.
So Joey and I started talking about capitalism. And it's just not really for me. I feel immoral when I participate in it. Especially at my job. I sell shoes. My objective is to sell as many shoes to as many people as I can. Why? To make money to give to other people. It makes sense to give something to someone who made something for you. But things are just so overpriced, because the whole objective is to make as much profit as you can. And you want to make a lot of profit so that you can buy a bunch of stuff you don't need. I'm not going to pretend like I don't like getting things. It's the fact that this whole country is all about getting as much money as you possibly can, and doing whatever you can to get it. As Eddie said, the American dream is "to get all the money in the world and stick it in your ears." So many people are not happy just living comfortably. They feel that they have to keep getting more money, and no matter how much they have, they still want more. And instead of being good human beings and giving some of that to people who really need it, and can't really do anything about not having it, they keep it all for themselves. Buy new cars, a new house, a big jet.
I really wish I could win a really big lottery. I've figured up that I only need $6,000,000 to live comfortably for the rest of my life. And when you see that a lot of jackpots are 30, 40, 100 million dollars, that would give me at least $20,000,000 that I would give to helping people, such as children's hospitals and disease research. And just think, if I were to give that much money to charity, people would probably be calling me a hero and stuff. But I wouldn't be a hero. I would be a human being helping people who need help. What everyone should do.
Something else to add. At almost any job, you get paid for being there, not for the work you do. For example, at my filing job, I could work 8 hours, and purge 10 boxes one day. Then the next day, I could work 8 hours, and purge three boxes. I'd get paid $48 for each day anyway. It doesn't matter how much work you do in almost ever job. The only jobs that aren't like that are you own businesses. Where you make something, then sell that. Or an artist. In those cases, the money you make is directly connected to how well you do your work.
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