Why I Wrote a Song Called "Pennies are Dollars"

     I was hanging with my friend Acker.  It was the time when the economy was going to hell and everyone was still trying to figure out what to do about it.  So we hit on this idea--what if pennies were declared to be worth a dollar?  Nickels are still nickels, dimes are dimes, dollars are still dollars--but a penny is a dollar.   

     I wondered how many pennies were in circulation.  Turns out, about 140 billion.  Now, compared with the money they’re throwing around to the banks--800 billion, 900 billion, a trillion—a hundred forty billion dollars did not seem like a lot to be added to the economy. 

     Unlike the other stimulus packages, where they give the banks a ton of dough, hoping they’ll start lending us some dough, this would immediately jolt the economy.  Everyone would go out and buy a washing machine, or a couch, or a fridge, or a watch, or treat the extended family to some roast duck.

     Even the poorest have a few pennies.  People who never before had any economic stake would suddenly afford a radio, or a pair of shoes.  Those useless pennies would buy a new computer, or some shelving, or some paint.  Grandma’s penny jar would pack a real punch.  A foreign holder of 86 million dollars would still have their 86 million, or whatever, in the bank.  But Americans, with actual pennies, would have a little extra spending power.  We’d be the talk of the world.   And wouldn’t the Canadians be jealous!

     There didn’t seem to be any serious flaws.  “Counterfeiting!” said one.  But let’s say they counterfeited 40 billion pennies.  Which is a lot.  But say they did.  So you have $180 billion and not $140 billion.  So what!  It still ain’t a trillion.  Plus, you’ve just privatized the making of pennies, which was a losing proposition anyway.  As part of the plan, the government would stop making pennies--did I mention that?

     I asked a professor friend to fly it past his economics pals.  He ran it down to the Italians, who apparently are more open to wild notions.  They liked it but assumed it was unworkable.  But they’re Italians!  I was not discouraged.

     The best way for the plan to actually be carried out was for the president to simply declare it, with no discussion or warning.  You’d like to guard against hoarding, if possible.

     I was not in our president’s circle of friends so I decided to write to his top economic advisors, outlining the plan, in detail.  I checked my own email every day for a reply.  Nothing.

     Then it dawned on me, maybe the penny idea wasn’t going to happen from the top down.  Maybe it had to come from the bottom up.  Small and lowly, like the penny itself.

     Something was needed to popularize the idea.  Thirty million people have seen MIA sing “Paper Planes.”  That’s how you start a movement.  A song!  A video!

     I corralled my friend Prestopino and we made up “Pennies are Dollars,” a catchy little 3-minute song, and I got some more friends, and we shot some footage. 

     It’s on youtube, just type in:

          “dan bern economic”,

     or

     http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7u1viu3XFAM

     And now some people are like, “It’s not as good as your old stuff!”  Or,  “Stick to romantic ballads!”

     But whatever.

     Some people never like a good idea.

     Or maybe they already threw away all their pennies.