Why am I even surprised. I realize that I'm no Brad Pitt, nor do I have Trumps money. Loyalty, understanding, humor, friendship, arms to cuddle while watching a movie, kisses to help the tears go away and above all else, love; this is what I have to offer. But in this fucked up world we live in, this circus we call society, its not enough.

Are we all so detached and selfish.

Why do I even try anymore? It would seem that this is all pointless...
(Sorry for the emo rant)

Just a brief little reminder, although I'm probably only talking to myself. The Sara Connor Chronicles has already started, Heros: Session 3 starts tomorrow, and the Office Session 5 starts on Thursday.
If your fans of the shows, I hope you enjoy them as much as I do. And if not, I'd would recommend that you give them a chance and watch them.

  I miss being in love. I miss that skip in the beat of my heart went she calls. I miss wrapping my arms around her, and how we seemed to perfectly fix together in our embrace. I miss spoiling my special someone. I'm an old school hopeless romantic, but alas, unfortunately in this day and age it seems there is little place for a guy like me.

What is this world coming to? Just the other day, I saw a video of a girl that was selling her virginity to the highest bidder, assuming they met a certain criteria. When she was asked why, she came off with the whole "women empowerment" speech, and "this is a capitalist world and I want to capitalize", all just to pay for college. Props for being a creative entrepreneur, but holy crap!!!

Ranting aside, I really miss just having someone to talk to, really talk to, without worry of being judged or ridiculed. I miss looking into eyes that calm me, and set my mind at ease.

One day. I will love again. I think Micheal Scott said it best, "I am a catch, and I refuse to be the one that gets away."

The video:

 

Alright kiddies, lets take a trip back in time and remember the glory day of childhood.

And prepare to feel old.

Cartoons from the 80's

Cartoons from the 90's

And there are many more not in these videos. I poked around youtube and found the intros to classics like Doug, Ren & Stimpy, The Chipmunks, the list goes on. What cartoon do you remember???

 

So, I'm dreaming of weddings and vows and celebration, actually not bad dream at all. I awake up, sit up in my bed, look over at my dog and ask, "What the heck was that about?" I didn't think much of it, and went through my morning routine. It wasn't until I sat down in front of my computer, that I realized what day it was.

If things were different, I would be in Puerto Rico right now, getting ready for a wedding... my wedding. It funny how the subconscious mind works, I had pretty much forgotten about that, or at least thats what I'm claiming, LOL.

I'm glad to say thought, that these things don't seam to phase me anymore. The past doesn't haunt me anymore. Actually today in particular I'm in a pretty good mood. Although sore from all the work I've done this past week, I had been able to spend some time with a girl from work, that have a bit of crush on. LOL, funny thing, I didn't realize how much of a crush I had until I went to lunch with her, I was really nervous for some reason. Hopefully she doesn't think I'm a spaz or something.

 

"To be great is to be misunderstood."

• Ralph Waldo Emerson

This ones for all the pep in PR. If you've watch a movie in Puerto Rico in the last ten tears (holy shit are we that old already) you probably remember some of these classic commercials. Enjoy...

And the "Pièce de résistance", most would say it is the unofficial national anthom for Puerto Rico...

  

"Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you."

-Vipin Sharma

What a great weekend. I hung out with friends, both old and new. Thursday it was Dancing at the Dallas Bull, Friday it was Downtown Disney, movies and Disney Quest. And yet...

My heart still weighs heavy. As much as I district myself from the thought of her, she still haunts my thoughts. A wise friend once told me that it wasn't her I missed, it was what we had. A very true thought, and for the most part true.

I fear that although I'm well on my way, I still have a lot of healing to do. It seams I'll never get the answers I seek when it comes to certain things, but I guess I'll just live with that, I've done it before.

I have many to distractions to ... distract me, LOL. (Did I mention my middle name is "Danger"). When it comes to her, I just try to think of all the good times, all that she has taught me. I would have gone through hell for her, I would have taken a bullet for her, I would let her hold the TV remote. To the good times, may they never be forgotten. :.)

 

"Oh somebody kill me please,
Somebody kill me please,
I'm on my knees,
Pretty pretty please kill me.

I want to die.
Put a bullet in my head."

Adam Sandler

Ugh. I blame myself. I set myself up, and she knocked me down. My own fault. As these tears run down my cheek, I ask myself the same questions, over and over. "What did I do to her to make her hate me so?" "What is so wrong with me that she and apparently no one else wants anything to do with me?" "Why..."

If your wondering, I'll tell you in do time. I haven't the strength to write any more...:(

  

Just finished a nice Mini Movie night. I bought the new Batman Gotham Knight animated movie. It's pretty much done in the same style as the "AniMatrix." Beautifully stylized, and great story telling. And yes, its give a taste of the "Dark Knight" movie coming up.

If your into Batman, go pick this one up.

Since I'm such a loser now, and have a lot of time on my hands, I figure I'd get back into tinkering again, last thing I took apart was a stereo cassette player, back in the ninth grade. And, with me building my own computer, and deal with some minor electronic repairs at work on the survey equipment, I think its a good hobby for me, keep my mind off of the frustrations of life.
Call me ambitious, but I'm going to to take up building and solar powered Stirling engine. Here's an example...



The next set would be to hook-up some kind of generator, to see how much electricity I could get out of it, save on some energy cost, or to charge a battery during the day. Maybe sell my design and make some money. Who knows.

As for other things, not much to report for now, I have a nice rant about women on dating web sites that don't want to date. Yeah, don't ask, I'll write about it, just wanted to cool off before I start dropping F bombs, LOL.

Ah, and sorry for no lyric at the beginning, no song stuck in my head today. I guess that might be a good think, considering the songs that do get stuck.

Laters...