Yes, my bluff has been called, so I should probably deliver the fiery manifesto that was promised earlier.  I have had a Yahoo email address for 6+ years.  I have also had a gmail address for a couple years, but it's been so hard to say goodbye, or I've been too lazy to transition away from my lamer and lamer yahoo account.  On Monday, I went to log into my yahoo mail.  My password didn't work.  I got a message about some infinitely vague "security concern" and was told my account would be locked for 24 hours, at which point I could log back in.  The message also told me that failed logins would not reset the 24 hour period.  So I kept trying, to no avail, and I didn't see the security message for awhile.  On Wednesday, I tried again and got the 24 hour message again, so I decided to give it a full interrupted 24 hour rest.  At some point, I found the yahoo email login web help interface and told Bangalore of my problems.  I was sent a response that told me to try the password reset process that already failed me, and that otherwise I should answer their questions via email to verify my account.  Thursday night I tried to login again and still no success.  The response to my email o' answers seemed to indicate that I had not satisfied their needs and told me to fax or mail them a package that included a copy of my driver license and more (some of the same) desired information.  The necessary information included the answer to my Security Question, but I DON'T KNOW THE QUESTION!  I SET IT UP 6 YEARS AGO!  My response told them that.  My last response from yahoo, courtesy of someone named "Proonay," told me that I must follow their procedure and fax them a complete package.  That's when I wished lovely Proonay good luck to the Yahoo enterprise and peace.  I CAN'T ANSWER A QUESTION WHEN I DON'T KNOW THE QUESTION! 

So my Yahoo era is over, probably long after most of you gave up on that lovely eeeeeenterprise.  Oh well.  I wish I had been able to salvage some info before my whole account was ganked, but such is life.  Please inquire within if you would like the particulars to communicate me via God's own email system called GMAIL.  Love,

Funkdastardly

(as originally posted here)

MP3: Clear Up My Mind

This weekend marks the release of Columbus' Green Brothers' second album, Sticky Funk Vol. 1, on Dove Ink Records.  As you may have already guessed by their group name, their album name, their album cover, etc., the Green Brothers are two weed-loving hip-hop fiends and they want you to join in on the party.  In the time since the release of their debut record Everybody's Green in 2006, Chicago MC Hiway 411 (AKA Racecar of Chicago hip-hop group Modill) ended the long-distance relationship with Columbus producer Claude 9 (AKA Eyamme), forcing Eyamme to reevaluate the project's lineup.  He soon found a like mind in Columbus DJ Bern One (AKA DJ Inform), and they united over Bern One's funk records and…some other stuff.  Sticky Funk was originally intended to be an entirely instrumental release, but eventually Eyamme decided he needed to take on the mic in the interest of their live shows.  The finished product is a patchwork display of the duo's talents.

Ten of the album's sixteen tracks are instrumental hip-hop tunes, often based on those gritty funk samples and many featuring Bern One's explosive turntable work.  The sound of these tracks ranges from upbeat grooves, like the snappy featured MP3, to mellow introspection, as on the back-to-back funky slow-burners "Top Down Funk" and "Crooning Guitar."  The vocal tracks are mostly message-based songs, like the inspirational "Call Me Cool" and the defiant "Guilty," or weed party jams, including the entertaining "Girls Gone Weed" and the slick posse cut "Word!," which features Columbus expatriate Bru Lei.  Eyamme is not at the top of the MC ranks yet, but his concise, confident flow helps fill the gap left by Hiway's departure.  The album covers a great deal of ground, both sonically and topically, but somehow the different flavors manage to flow together rather well.  This album is an interesting step forward for the Green Brothers, and it will be interesting to see where the weed takes the group next.

The Green Brothers will celebrate the release of Sticky Funk with a party at Skully's on Saturday, November 1st.  The show is part of Dove Ink's Open Canvas series, a monthly Gallery Hop after party and live art showcase.  Therefore, the supporting lineup is quite eclectic, highlighted by their Cincinnati-based labelmate, rapper Ill Poetic, and Columbus' two-man metal maelstrom Big Nasty.  The show is free and the music and art kick off at 9 PM.

(Hey look, I can still write!  This was originally posted here)

Ancestors - Neptune With Fire

October 7, 2008 – 3:51 pm | by Andrew Patton

MP3: Neptune With Fire (Edit)

Released in August, Neptune With Fire is the debut release for both the Ancestors, a Los Angeles-based metal quintet of varying description, as well as for North Atlantic Sound, a new imprint on Tee Pee Records. The near future of the label (as well as that of the band) will be interesting to follow, as this epic release paints North Atlantic as a label with clear artistic and conceptual standards and, therefore, upcoming releases already have a strong benchmark set for them.

What makes Neptune With Fire different from any other album that I've heard in 2008 is that the album's ample 38:26 running time is composed of only two songs: the 17-minute "Orcus' Avarice" and the nearly 22-minute title track (a seven-minute snippet of this track is posted above to give you a taste). Therefore, though there are attributes of many metal subgenres on display here (psychedelic, doom, sludge, etc.), the most obvious characteristic of this album is the band's desire to jam. Both tracks feature lengthy sections with moments of distortion and noise used as transitions.  Neptune With Fire is presented as a concept album, as a metaphorical character experiences a transforming journey.  Unfortunately, the lack of and oft-unintelligible nature of lyrics on the songs (which are apparently sung by committee) hinders my understanding of the quest at hand.  This is not a major detriment, however, because the moods of the different sections of each song and the transitions between these sections shed some light into the pain and glory expressed therein.

The band handles their various styles ably, as the album's opening psychedelic passage jams pretty hard, and the almost medieval air of a large portion of the title track lends an air of weighty fantasy.  Though J. Christopher Watkin's organ stands out on the title track, the individual instruments usually blend into a cohesive unit as the band focuses on creating airtight sonic portraits.  Many of the songs' sections lumber repetitively as momentum is built very slowly and the groove forms and transforms naturally.  The abundance of these transformations of varying speed keep these long tracks fresh and allow the band plenty of time to construct the appropriate moods and tie up loose ends when necessary.

Neptune With Fire is a strong debut for the Ancestors and is highly recommended to those who have the patience for metal epics.  The album, featuring artwork designed by Arik Roper (who has done the same for many of the Ancestors' psychedelic metal compatriots), is currently available on both vinyl and CD at the Tee Pee shop.

(as originally posted here)

May 20, 2008 – 2:43 pm | Written by Andrew Patton

MP3: Thin Line

Man, Sweden seems like a happening place these days (or, you know, from my distorted American perspective, it's been cool for the last decade or so). I wonder how the live shows are over there, as that would be quite the road trip. Anyway, the swelling American rock 'n roll depot that is Tee Pee Records (Brian Jonestown Massacre, High On Fire, Teeth Of The Hydra) recently issued the self-titled debut from Gothensburg's Graveyard. This quartet claims old-school influences like Cream and Black Sabbath, and does a respectable job of honoring such touchstones.

From the somber opening drums of "Evil Ways," it is obvious that producer Don Ahlstenburg (The International Noise Conspiracy, Soundtrack Of Our Lives, etc.) has helped craft a gritty throwback record. Despite that (or inspired by it?), the band goes on to drop nine tracks worthy of today's rock ears. Lead singer Joakim Nilsson loves to howl on the fierier numbers ("Take Us For Fools," "Lost In Confusion"), but can also turn out a comfortable croon (though he does verge into "Grover"-esque territory at times during the otherwise-smoldering "Blue Soul"). Though the twin guitar attack of Nilsson and Jonathan Ramm does not delve into mind-bending pyrotechnics, there is a subtle (classically-influenced?) virtuosity in the instrumentation that keeps the proceeds light in front of the thunderous yet agile rhythm section of Bikar Edlund (bass) and Axel Sjoberg (drums). The boys possess a tempered sound that, despite surges in volume and tempo, never allows the songs to come off as "happy," so this is not a record to look to for a pick-me-up. However, the somewhat-downtrodden subject matter is rotated enough to avoid a severe onset of depression (especially with the sentiment of well-chosen closer "Satan's Finest").

Though Graveyard is not exactly an original rock 'n roll outfit, their style is varied enough to interest fans of both classic hard rock and more contemporary rock sounds. This effort is sufficiently sturdy to show the potential of a bright future beyond the grave.

(originally posted here)

MP3: Cadillac Rap feat. Blueprint

The stock of Columbus hip-hop collective Bottom Brick has been on the rise as of late. Since the release of The Framework EP in late 2006, they have stayed in the spotlight with energetic live shows, side project EPs, and individual members showcasing their talents (like producer Seance's involvement in a recent production showcase at So What Wednesdays). This weekend sees the release of the group's first full-length album, The Groundbreaking, a self-released effort.

The Groundbreaking is 16 tracks long, boasting plenty "old-fashioned" boom-bap rap. Which is not to say that the material sounds particularly dated, but just that Bottom Brick will satisfy most fans of classic '90s hip-hop. The beats (mostly handled by the group's Seance and Mattinee) are solid backdrops for the MCs, highlighted by the horn-laced banger "Cadillac Rap" and the chilled out vibes of the aptly-titled "Cool Out." The group's MCs (Adjust, H.I.M Illaflo, and Seance) do the beats justice most of the time, ably handling varied subject matter and moods. There are a few questionable moments on the mic (the hook on "As It Is" comes to mind), but most of the time, the lyrics and beats mesh well. The album also includes vocal appearances by Columbus all-stars Blueprint (on the aforementioned "Cadillac Rap"), Illogic (whose unhinged verse contributes well to the ethereal "Anthropology") and Grmm Diabolic. For a group's first full-length record, it is not surprising that the album's pace bogs down a bit in the middle, mostly due to a string of songs about life's struggles. "Cool Out" gets the proceedings back on track, however, and paves the way for a more upbeat ending including the good-natured drinkin' and partyin' anthem "More the Merrier," the lone carryover here from The Framework.

Despite a few missteps, The Groundbreaking shows a group of hip-hop artists getting more familiar with each other and their roles. No matter the mood, there are tracks here that will complement it well.

Bottom Brick will celebrate its album release with a show (including a featured guest appearance by Blueprint) at the High Five on Saturday, May 3rd. Also on the bill is a tag team performance from Illogic & Ill Poetic, sets from Grmm Diabolic and Ol' Scandalous, and party jams from DJs Detox, Lefto, and Product. It is rare that all of a hip-hop album's vocal contributors are present for the release party, so the show should be a fine display of what the album is all about.

(As originally posted here)

MP3: The Lesser Stars

Two years after releasing their first full-length album (Birds & Butterflies) on Columbus Discount, Columbus' Proper Nouns have returned with A Million Hurtful Things, their first release on upstart local label All Hail Records. Though the boys at CDR recorded most of the album and the relationship between the label/studio and the band appears to be intact, the shift in headquarters seems to make sense stylistically. The Nouns' precise pop doesn't mesh very well with the rougher textures of bands like Necropolis and El Jesus De Magico (however unfair the pigeonholing may be), and as they are a bit unique in the Columbus "scene," the association with a more varied label like All Hail (Paper Airplane, Electric Grandmother, etc.) likely ensures a less biased perception of their tunes.

After the two-year break, A Million Hurtful Things builds well on the foundation laid on their previous release. The band's lineup has changed, with Justin Riley (Terribly Empty Pockets, Super Desserts, etc.) replacing the departed Dave Gibson on Wurlitzer, other keyboards, and background vocals. Though the keyboards have always been an integral part of the Nouns' sound, Riley seems to be more assertive in his contributions, especially on the Animals-esque "Conditions Are Worse" and the jaunty "The Lesser Stars." Lead singer/guitarist and primary songwriter Matt Ogborn has concocted another batch of roughly delicate pop songs. His wit and enunciation are as sharp as ever, lending humor to "Long-Time Correspondent" and the "sneering" "My First Death Ray." The rhythm section of Travis Kokas (bass, background vocals) and Phil Francis (drums) continues to provide a steady backbone for the band, and Francis' rumbling fills add excitement.

Though the sound presented here is very similar to that of their previous effort, the main difference (and in my opinion, improvement) is that the songs on A Million Hurtful Things are much more drawn out and relaxed, with a perceptible swagger that was often lacking in their previous material. These longer tunes seem to allow the band to get more comfortable with the task at hand, to pleasing effect. The addition of handclaps is nice too.

The Proper Nouns will celebrate the release of A Million Hurtful Things with a show at Cafe Bourbon Street on Friday, May 2. Joining in the festivities will be RTFO Bandwagon and Heavy Mole.

(as originally posted here)

January 8, 2008 – 6:37 pm | by Andrew Patton

MP3: Trouble by Linda Dachtyl

For Hep Cats is the second album by Columbus' Linda Dachtyl. She has had a successful career so far in the local and national jazz scenes, playing organ, keyboards, and drums in a variety of projects. Her own group, LDB3, is a jazz organ combo that is steeped in the traditions of '60s soul jazz stars like Jimmy Smith and Jimmy McGriff and Columbus organ heroes like Hank Marr and Tony Monaco. Her first album, Blue Bop (recorded under the LDB3 & Friends moniker), was one of my favorite Columbus releases of 2006.

For Hep Cats builds on the success of her debut by sticking with that album's strengths (fresh renditions of organ classics and jazz standards) while also adding some bluesy vocal numbers and two Dachtyl original instrumentals. The album's opening track, "Trouble," features Columbus tenor sax legend Gene Walker in an update of the soul jazz classic popularized by the tenor sax/organ tandem of Stanley Turrentine and Shirley Scott. This version features plenty of gospel feel and climaxes with a double-time sprint to church before a stately return to the original melody. The group's take on Thelonious Monk's "Straight, No Chaser" features the nimble guitar work of Robert Kraut (of the Tony Monaco Trio) and Dachtyl's emotive soloing. The vocals add some sultry soul to the proceedings, especially Jazzmary's triumphant take on Nina Simone's "Do I Move You?" and Larry Smith's smoky "Little Red Rooster." The program wraps up with "Frame For The Blues," a gentle yet solid finale with substantial solos from Walker, Kraut, and Dachtyl.

Tuesday, January 8th, marks the national release of For Hep Cats on Summit Records, via Monaco's Chicken Coup Records imprint. Visit the "Releases" page at Linda Dachtyl's website for ordering information and album samples.

(as originally posted here)

October 25, 2007 – 9:03 am | Written by Andrew Patton

MP3: Go To Your Room by Sound of Urchin

For the uninitiated, the sound of Brooklyn's Sound of Urchin is a bit hard to describe and always prone to evolution. Through their 2002 debut (major label) full-length You Are The Best and onto its 2005 (not major label) follow-up The Diamond, lead singer/drummer Tomato and his merry band of miscreants have seemingly fought to mash their influences and desires into something that rocks hard but finding cohesion has sometimes been difficult.

Their new release, Rejoice, builds on the progress they made on the second album, resulting in their most accomplished statement to date. While the proceeds never reach monotony, the quartet has honed a solid base of anthemic hard rock that is colored by some extended jams, some thrash-outs, and even some good ol' fashioned cowbell. Tomato's lyrics are just as whimsical as ever and rather idealistic for a dude that hates hippies, but you know, life is complicated. Some highlights include the pleading 808 jam "The Last From Me," the gentle wake-up anthem "The Rooster Says Good Morning," and the pleading "Don't Walk Me Down That Road," anchored by Doo Doo's sturdy bass. "Disappointment Has Come Upon Me" features some twin guitar shredding courtesy of co-lead guitarists Reverend B-Ill and Seahag ala Thin Lizzy (their myspace page describes their sounds as a combination of Thin Lizzy and the Bee Gees, which I can't argue with much). A few of the songs are a tad overdone, and I could really do without the last track, but the complaints are few and far between here.

Sound of Urchin is in the last week of their album launch tour and will be touching down Thursday night (today) at the Ravari Room. Your paid admission includes a copy of Rejoice, which is quite a benefit. The album doesn't officially drop until 2008, so the boys want the jams in the hands of the fans pronto. Opening are their Columbus pals The Brown Notes and Dobbs, a new Columbus trio featuring ex-Salthorse drummer Chris Cox. If you need any more convincing, here's a vintage SOU show review from yours truly.

Peep here and let me know what you think.  See you Saturday.