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Glenn Gaylord

Last Updated: 10/29/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 47
Sign: Scorpio

City: WEST HOLLYWOOD
State: California
Country: US
Signup Date: 5/13/2005

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Thursday, October 29, 2009

IT'S YOU (The La La Song)

Check out the song IT'S YOU (The La La Song) by Chris Salvatore - written by Chris and I and heard in our film, EATING OUT: ALL YOU CAN EAT. We sure could use your support, .99 cents, and comments on iTUNES!

IT'S YOU on iTUNES

http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?id=336067208&s=143441

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Wednesday, October 07, 2009

EATING OUT: ALL YOU CAN EAT - VILLAGE VOICE REVIEW

It has always been my dream to get a review in the Village Voice. When I was growing up in small town Ohio, my mother used to subscribe to the VV as a way of staying connected to the rest of the world. I would pore over every review of films I knew I'd have no chance of seeing. It was important for me to know what people were making nonetheless. When I moved out to LA, I saw so many films as a way of making up for lost time. To this day, I still go a few times a week, at least. Finally, my own first feature, has been reviewed in the VV! What a great day! Go see my film in SF and NY this weekend at the Roxie and Quad respectively. It opens in LA on Friday, Oct 16th at the Sunset 5. Opening weekend grosses are EVERYTHING to the little films.

http://www.villagevoice.com/2009-10-06/film/eating-out-3-all-you-can-eat/

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Wednesday, September 23, 2009

ARTICLE ON ME IN FRONTIERS IN L.A.

Check it out! - so cool!
http://www.frontierspublishing.com/2811/features/feat.html

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Friday, September 04, 2009

Eating Out: All You Can Eat - Official Trailer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54o3nbB028s

It's here! The official trailer to our little movie that could, EATING OUT: ALL YOU CAN EAT - coming to theatres in October! WARNING: It's NSFW.

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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Eating Out: All You Can Eat - Teaser

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4cUUlznlVX4

Here's the teaser trailer to my new movie! Check it out!

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A VIDEO FOR THE AGES

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Saturday, October 18, 2008

MYSPACE SPONSORED LINKS - WTF???
Current mood:

pissed off

So there I was minding my own business, checking out MYSPACE this morning when I noticed something...er...um..peculiar. And no, it wasn't a crab in my private area.

I clicked on MANAGE BLOG and saw the most horrendous thing EVER! There was a banner ad at the top of the page with the following copy:

GAY MARRIAGE
Keep marriage between a man & a woman. Learn more today.
protectmarriage.com

WTF? It has a little header at the top right that says SPONSORED LINK.

Horrified that someone might see this and think I support this swill, I contacted myspace to ask why it's there and how can I get rid of it stat. I received a form letter back with suggestions on how to manage my blog. Luckily, they offered for me to respond to them in case their form letter didn't fix the problem.

So I wrote back to inform them that it indeed did not and that I was deeply offended that this type of link was posted on my page.

Has this happened to you? Click on your MANAGE BLOG page and see what's there. Write to myspace and let them know how you feel. Tired of assholes thinking they can impinge on my civil rights. Tired of bullies who have no respect for the constitution, separation of church and state, and for human beings who are entitled to a word like "marriage" as much as anyone else. Sick of people claiming that "marriage" is a term that is exclusively owned by their religion, when it most certainly does not. Just stop being assholes and try to behave as a good person and learn THAT from your religious indoctrination. ASSHOLES!!! Now I'm pissed!

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

No on 8 PSA: MARGARET CHO & SELENE LUNA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IypN3c8fBw

I used to work with Selene Luna back in the day at AIDS PROJECT LOS ANGELES. She is a good egg. How awesome is it that she is doing this NO ON PROP 8 video with Margaret Cho. Selene has always been gay friendly, but this kicks it up a notch, doncha think? Californians, don't be dickheads. VOTE NO ON 8!

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Tuesday, October 14, 2008

WATCH THIS BEFORE YOU VOTE ON NOV. 4, CALIFORNIANS!

I think this video just about says it all. People who vote YES on 8 are forever doomed to wear ill-fitting suits and hideously undersized ties. Nuff said.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

CARDIO CHICKEN

I started taking classes again at my gym. A thing I haven't done in almost 10 years. I used to take a Step Class back in the 90s a couple of times a week. It was so fun and daring back then piling a couple of planks together on top of those square bases. Sometimes, when I was feeling nervy, I would build a two-tiered base, to really get a workout! Whoo! Legwarmers! Whoo! Cut-off sweatshirt dangling off the shoulder just so! I looked like a Harvey Edwards photo come to life! Whoo!

When the movie PERFECT came out in 1985, starring John Travolta and Jamie Lee Curtis, I was first in line to aerobicize. They even shot some scenes at my 24 Fitness gym...but back then it was called the Beverly Hills Sports Connection. It's located on Santa Monica Blvd. in the heart of West Hollywood, but back in the 80s, putting West Hollywood on your company name instantly labeled your business as gay...so they didn't wanna do that. Funny, how people are paying top dollar to open their businesses in West Hollywood now. Payback's a bitch, and so are we.

The fitness craze filled those classes up in the 80s and 90s.
Everyone felt like a celebrity in their stretchy spandex doing kick steps to BARBIE GIRL played in quadruple time. You haven't lived until you've thrusted out your crotch one-two-three-four times in a row to En Vogue's MY LOVIN' (YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GET IT).

No effin' way can I do a booty shake in front of these people!

Eff you NAP-TAB!!!

My how times have changed. Classes these days are clearly only meant for SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE contestants. You simply must know advanced hip hop as taught my Napoleon and Tabitha or you're out! I could never learn the choreography in the name of burning calories, so I opted for the simpler life of the Elliptical machine and weights.

I recently started taking exercise and diet more seriously and have had amazing results. I'm bicycling everywhere, working out 5-7 days a week, and eating small portions 6x/dy of a wide variety of foods, making sure I get my fruits, veggies, and protein in consistently. To push my body even further, I decided to take some classes again at my gym. To my astonishment, I saw that they were still offereing STEP and AEROBICS classes...just a couple a week snuck in there between the hordes of KRUMPING and POLE DANCING and BOOT CAMPING nightmares.

So off I went. I first tried out a Step class, since I've been taking steps since I was 1 years old. There were only five of us in the class, and I was easily the youngest there. I was also the only male in a sea of 60-something women with botox and lifts and nips and tucks for as far as my eyes could or wanted to see. I didn't find it easy to pick up again. I didn't know a scissor kick from a helicopter turn to save my life. The instructor wouldn't take the time to help me, which sucked, seeing how I was the only novice in the room, but I persisted and eventually got the hang of it. I would, however, always end up on the wrong side of the platform, or my arms would be facing the wrong direction as everybody else. It didn't matter. I wasn't going to be the first of the group to die, and that's all that mattered.

Thrust that crotch!!!!

Today, I went to my first Aerobics class in...well, let's just say that Terri Nunn was the shit back then...and if you don't know who she is, then fuck you and everybody else with your youthful glow! There were about 20 people in this one, and yet again, I was the only person not draft eligible during the Vietnam War. In fact, I was the only person whose awareness of the Korean War was formed strictly from old M*A*S*H episodes. I loved being the youngest in this class, even though I could see the speckles of grey hair in the mirrors on every side of me. I had a little more bounce in my step compared to the woman with the tennis ball decorated walker to my right. I felt like I was back in my childhood, when I was the youngest of 8 kids. The baby. To quote Irene Cara, "What a feeling!"

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Saturday, August 09, 2008

THE SLOPPIES

Welcome to the FIRST SLOPPY AWARDS. We're coming at you live from my living room to bring you the messiest of the messes. SLOPPIES are given out to sloppy storytellers in TV, Film, and Music.

Selection Criteria: I pick the winners. Period.

Rules and Eligibility: Anybody is eligible for a Sloppy, but they must be recent achievements or I will simply forget them.

FAQs:

Q: What is a SLOPPY?

A: It's an award that looks like this:

It's given out to the Sloppiest Storytellers in TV, Film and Music.

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Q: Are the SLOPPIES televised?

A: Not yet. But we're hoping Andy Cohen will be calling from BRAVO momentarily.

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Q: Can we get to the awards now?

A: Ok asshole. Here we go.

__________________________________________________

The SLOPPY for MOST MANGLED REALITY COMPETITION ENDING goes to.....

What season are we from and who won?

BRAVO for the way it handles the PROJECT RUNWAY MODELS. As Heidi Klum reminds us every season, "Remember, this is a competition for the models as well." Really? Is anyone really all that invested in them? Do we look for their spreads in Elle magazine? Are they OUR muses? You were fooling nobody when you thought we would get to know the models better in that episode where they got to shop for their own fabrics at Mood. What we gleaned from that was the knowledge that they all have lousy taste. I defy anyone to name the winning models from each season. Sloppy, sloppy Bravo!

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The SLOPPY for WAY TO RUDELY OVERLOOK YOUR RUNNER -UP IN A REALITY COMPETITION goes to SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE.

Who do you have to frug around here to get a goddammed clip package?

As each of the Top 4 dancers were eliminated, they were given a wonderfully emotional clip package of their best moves over inspirational bites such as "This has been an amazing journey for me." But Runner-Up, Twitch, was simply given a bouquet, a hug from some random stagehand, and was whisked off the stage. Where was his clip package? Why didn't he get to say anything? And yet 3rd place Katee not only got her montage, she got $50,000. Twitch should be a Bitch right about now. You feel me? 4 REAL! Holla a ya boy!

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The SLOPPY for WORST GRAMMAR EVER BY A REALITY COMPETITION CONTESTENT goes to JESSIE GODDERZ, the dimbulb bodybuilder eliminated on BIG BROTHER 10.

How can I be a douche if I can't even spell it?

Here are some examples of his less than stellar command of the English language - -

"I'm gonna fight with everything from toe to head of me."

He referred to Libra as "the most deviant person in this house".

And my all-time personal favorite, this was Jessie's "Goodbye Video" to ejected houseguest, Angie:

"You have a rationalized mind, and at least you're going to be able to communicate with people who aren't insane, or don't have a really poor judgment of rationale. I could make more similes or analogies if you want, but I think you understand everything I'm trying to portray right now."

SCORE!!

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The SLOPPY for WORST LIP CONTINUITY goes to DARK KNIGHT'S MAKEUP DEPARTMENT.

A closer look

I'm on to you, Peter Robb-King and company. When you're watching Christian Bale on a 4 story tall IMAX screen, there is no mistaking a ginormous set of chapped lips in an early scene, immediately followed by a scene in which said sores are gone. Hmmmm, let's see, you are producing what may become one of the biggest moneymakers in film history and you couldn't spend 5 more seconds applying a little coverup to your star's dried out kissers? Fer chrissakes, a little CGI manipulation in post production would have solved the problem. HOLY OVERSIGHT!

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And THE SLOPPY for MOST BLATANT ATTEMPT TO CASH IN ON AMY WINEHOUSE'S SUCCESS goes to...

Duffy! Sure she's sober, hotter, and has a tad more vocal control than Our Lady Wino. But does her first single "Mercy" have to so obviously be a ripoff of "Rehab", down to the "Yeah, Yeah, Yeah" backing chorus that mimics the "No, No, No" from Amy's hit? Besides, don't we want our pop stars to be fucked up, bruised, slurring messes?

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Well, that about wraps up our First Sloppy Awards. You've been a lovely audience. Don't forget to tip the valet.

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Friday, August 01, 2008

WHAT IS THE WORLD TRYING TO TELL ME?

I've had an obstacle or two thrown in my path over the course of my lifetime so far. Ok, make that thousands upon thousands, but who's counting? Some have been major, other minor annoyances.

The point is, they accumulate and yet can't be lumped together. Haven't you ever wished you could gather all of them together and collectively lash out at them, just so they all could understand what they've put you through? But you can't, and individually, most of them seem rather minor...

- the people who insist on waddling side-by-side on the bike lane at the beach, blocking your right to peddle! And they don't even walk on the side against traffic, so they can't see you dying a slow death behind them.

- their cousins are the ones who cross said bike lane without checking in either direction if there is, oh I don't know, perhaps a bike and a human being whizzing towards them at 25 mph?

- the guy who cancels a date at the last minute two nights in a row via email instead of calling and being a grownup about it.

- the agent who has ignored your calls for years who finally hears of your script and says, "Ooh! What a great idea! I would have been all over that last year, but now all I am looking for are summer tentpole films and high concept horror."

- the doctor's office that never answers its phone and is completely unable to offer an itemized bill of their services, and yet has the nerve to send a minimialist statement that says your balance is overdue by 60 days despite the fact that you pay everything at the time of service

- the person who texts while driving in front of you who flips you off when you give a friendly little toot on your horn, because they are swerving all over the place while going 2 mph.

And then there are the major issues -

- the monthly health insurance premium the size of a mortgage that virtually guarantees that you will never be a homeowner

- the health issues

- the fear of pushing 50 alone

- seeing countless friends die

- not being anywhere close to the success your peers are

I could go on and on with major and minor things, but I think you get the point. It always, however, inevitably leads to the same question: WHAT IS THE WORLD TRYING TO TELL ME?

Am I doomed? Is "God" trying to teach me a lesson? Am I being punished for my sins? Am I only being given as much as I can handle?

WTF is THE SECRET to all this?

After much soul-searching, I've come to the conclusion that I've been given a privileged front row seat to witness the beautiful randomness of chaos.

Sounds crazy, but try it sometimes. When a car peels out in front of you from a side street without even looking or stopping, think to yourself, "Of course. I expected that. I'd be disappointed if it didn't happen." It's my "EXPECT THE WORST SO YOU WON'T BE DISAPPOINTED WHEN IT HAPPENS" guide to life.

Sure, it's a tad pessimistic, but it seems the "power of positive thinking" is just a catchphrase invented to keep poor people from rioting against the rich. Same with, "God has a plan for us all", "Money can't buy you happiness", and "If it was meant to be, it would have happened". So instead, I EMBRACE the randomness of it all, and BRACE myself for whatever may get in my way.

It's a cousin to the whole "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade" philosophy, except it's more like, "When life shits on you, make funny diarrhea".

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Tuesday, July 29, 2008

AN INTERVIEW WITH MYSELF

GG: What has been the foremost thing on your mind lately?

Do your farts smell as good as mine?

GG: I've really wanted to know how many students on INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO have become super famous.

GG: What's in your CD player right now?

GG: Aimee Mann's new CD, @%&*! Smilers. I can't stop playing FREEWAY and IT'S OVER. Normally I hook up my iPOD, but I'm finding it easier to just leave this CD in the car stereo rather than search through my iPOD and risk leaving it in the glove compartment where it can melt or get stolen.

GG: What's the last thing you downloaded onto your iPOD?

GG: After begging iTUNES to carry all of Elton John's collection as they had promised but didn't deliver, they finally added the three albums I was looking for, 21 AT 33, JUMP UP!, and BREAKING HEARTS. From those albums, I instantly downloaded the following:

- WHITE LADY WHITE POWDER - a jaunty tune about cocaine addiction featuring fun backing vocals from the Eagles.

- BALL AND CHAIN - upbeat country-ish pop song with Pete Townsend of THE WHO on acoustic guitar. Slight, but one of Sir Elton's most underappreciated tunes.

- BREAKING HEARTS AIN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE - This one isn't slight but is also in the category of most underappreciated. Aside from the oddly angelic backing vocals, this is a haunting song that wouldn't be out of place in some Andrew Lloyd Webber atrocity...and I mean that in a good way.

- IN NEON - I like the chorus. It soars.

- BURNING BUILDINGS - I think he ripped off his own SOMEONE SAVED MY LIFE TONIGHT, and I don't know about you, but I could hear 3-4 different variations of that song and be ok with it.

- DID HE SHOOT HER? - this song sounds like one of those flashy Vegas production numbers, you know, where they decide it's time to pick up the pace a bit? But when you listen to it now, it sounds cheesy and sluggish. Worth it just to have that feeling.

GG: What is the last book that you read?

GG: David Sedaris' WHEN YOU ARE ENGULFED IN FLAMES. I'm a big fan of his work, and this one definitely has many laugh-out-loud moments, but his endless diary approach to the extended "suite" where he quits smoking in Japan seemed a little too unfocused. His story on the French expression "d'accord!", however, is classic. The new catchphrase for 2008! Confession time: I actually had David read the book to me on the audio CD. Does that count as reading a book? Discuss.

GG: Ok then, you miserable cheater, what is the last thing you actually sat down and read?

GG: A recap of THE MOLE on realitynewsonline.com

GG: Who is THE MOLE?

So not the MOLE!

GG: Fuck if I know. I guessed Victoria because they showed her getting a chocolate massage in South America in the 3rd episode. And we all know that chocolate is used in mole sauce. Get it, MOLE? I was all kinds of wrong about that, so don't make me guess. There are three left and I would still get it wrong.

GG: What is your favorite Jenny Craig food item?

GG: Hands down, the Turkey Burger. Mixed with onions and peppers on a potato roll with bbq sauce, this 280 calorie honey has helped me lose 20 pounds in the past 5 weeks. I like to add lettuce, pickles and tomato to mine in order to "make it my own"! Move over Valerie Bertinelli. There's a new Skinny Bitch in town! Have you called Jenny yet?

GG: What is the last film you saw?

GG: THE DARK KNIGHT. But I think that film has been talked out, don't you think? So let's rewind back to the one before it. I went to a screening of Allan Ball's feature directorial debut, TOWELHEAD. Despite some bad buzz, I actually liked it a lot. Think AMERICAN BEAUTY meets a Benneton ad that's been sexually abused by Harvey Dent, et voila!....quirky, indie oddballs on parade! The film's a bit of a mess, but gets bonus points for daringly having a sexually expressive 13-year-old character as its protagonist. NAMGLA [North American Man Girl Love Association ???] members all over will rejoice.

GG: Who was the last famous person you saw out in public lately, and why?

GG: Does Jackie Warner of WORKOUT fame count? If so, she was at The Abbey on Sunday having drinks with friends. Less famous, also from Bravo, and drinking at The Abbey as well, was James Getzlaff, the main guy on BOY MEETS BOY. So I suppose that answers the time-honored question, "Where do gay reality stars go to be seen by pathetic self-interviewers on Sundays?" As to the "Why" part of the question, because gay reality stars need to drink away their pain expensively.

GG: When was the last time you masturbated?

GG: Figuratively speaking, when I sat down with you for this interview.

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Monday, July 21, 2008

REALITY GUY CANDY ROUNDUP - JULY 2008

BIG BROTHER SEASON 10 -

The back-to-basics approach is a welcome reboot to a series that has gotten increasingly gimmicky over time. Enough with the lame secret relationships already! Just put a house full of opposites together and let the bitchery begin.

BUT... while there seems to be the usual assortment of guy candy this season, it all breaks down as follows...

JESSIE

...an immature, power hungry, narcissistic, self-involved tool. And he doesn't even have the good graces to be gay with those traits! WTF?

STEVEN

...the token gay who thinks his idea of good game play is to separate himself from everybody and whine about it. Good going! [also loses points for calling Libra, "that colored girl", on the feeds - -it's last season's token gay all over again!]

OLLIE

...nice arms and a kinda cute personality until he opens his mouth and uses his religion to justify saying things like "token gay is going to burn in hell". Burn in hell, Ollie!

MEMPHIS

...kinda like a cuter, slightly pudgier version of Spencer Pratt...and that's where the shower nozzle masturbation fantasies about this "Mixologist" go flying out the window.

JERRY

...if 75 is indeed the new 74, then this has got to be the hottest Senior Citizen EVER! [not counting Cher of course]. But he needs to stop playing Yoda, start listening instead of imparting words of wisdom, and let them vote him out before he gets another goiter.

BRIAN

...this Dr. Will 2.0 took his shirt off way too early in the season. Dude, a week on slop would have taken care of that not-tv-friendly body of yours. Why would you go on Big Brother if you're not even ripped anyhow? The horror! I'm convinced this is why he was eliminated and not the fact that he overplayed his hand the minute the game started.

DAN

...what can I say? I kinda saved the best for last. He's kinda cute, and he seems pretty accepting of the gays. Although is it just me, or does he have nipples that seem to have been played with a lot, especially for a Catholic School Teacher?

PROJECT RUNWAY 5 -

One episode in and those Magical Elves did a nice job of giving us the distinct personalities of this group, but methinks they overdid it with the casting of too many Lisa Loeb lookalikes. Now PR has never been known for having oodles of guy candy. It's all about thimbles and Tresomme walls and shit, but this season has a couple...although I have my trepidations...

WESLEY

...at first I thought he was cute in that "I'm from Massachusetts and have a giant stick up my ass" sort of way, but then he left the New Gotham apartment in shorts that I can best describe as 1960s Country Club Housewife and my man crush was crushed.

SUEDE

...we are not going to talk about Suede, because Suede talks about Suede better than any of us can. But, I will say, that I hate Suede's fauxhawk, I hate Suede's Indigo Girls flannel, and I hate designers with one name that you are 100% sure they were not born with! I like to think of Suede as just plain old Brad Wardrop from the block.

We're just gonna skip over...

...girlicious,

...talented, cute, but a little dull...

...Miss "I think saying 'Make It Work' is so funny" like so many Santinos ago...

...this First Voted Off Fodder whose outfit was American Psycho Meets The Scary Slasher Dwarf in DON'T LOOK NOW...

...and the TSG [that's gay lingo for Token Straight Guy]...

AND WE WILL FOCUS SOLEY ON...

...I haven't found any flaws yet, except he is one of those "straight acting" gays who calls everyone "BUDDY", has straight looking ink, walks and talks like a pussy eater from way back, and committed the cardinal sin of making a dress out of a table cloth in the first innovation challenge!!! Ok, maybe HOT is the new SKANK.

SHEAR GENIUS 2 -

Sorry - there's just no Guy Candy on this show, but doesn't she look amazing?

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Sunday, July 13, 2008

WHO RAISED YOU?

I find myself asking "WHO RAISED YOU?" more and more these days.

Not in the, "I care to know more about your parents" sense.

More like in the "I'm sure you were born a nice person, but somewhere along the way, all the nice got sucked out of you" sense.

Now, before you mistake me for one of those regional haranguers, I don't think this level of douchitude is limited to Los Angeles. I hear way too many people say that this city is a particular breeding ground for assholes...and it sure can be...but I think assholism has become a worldwide problem. SOMEBODY had to kidnap Ingrid Betancourt, and it probably wasn't an Angeleno. I don't think anyone from Los Angeles is threatening to behead gay people in The Gambia. George Bush wasn't raised here either. Nuff said.

There just seems to be a plethora of bad behavior everywhere I look these days...

- It's the old man at my gym who insists on walking from the showers back to his locker dripping wet and without a towel.

- It's the guy walking down the street not watching where he's going and banging into me while I'm carrying three bags of groceries...and he didn't apologize, he didn't say anything, he just kept on walking.

- It's the woman who honked her horn and tried to drive me off the rode while I was being all green and shit and riding my bicycle. And I was in the bike lane! AND then she cut me off so she could make a right turn. Driver's Ed 101! Allow the cyclists in bike lanes to pass BEFORE moving your 2 tons of steel into said lane to make a turn!

- It's the unsmiling guy who walks his shit-tsu by my house every day, and even though I have said "hello" to him countless times, he never bothers to say anything back. In fact, he doesn't even make eye contact.

- It's the next door neighbor who talks to his dog using this annoying high-pitched squeal and says things like, "Yes! Who's the pretty girl? Is it you?"....AT THREE IN THE MORNING...ON A WEEK NIGHT...WITH HIS WINDOWS WIDE OPEN!

- It's the person in front of me who gave me the finger because I tapped a friendly toot on my horn as she sat at the green light for ten seconds texting her friend.

- It's the customer waiting next to me at the Apple Genius Bar who drew me into her drama by asking me if I saw the problem on her iMAC screen that she was seeing. When I politely told her I didn't, she said, "Well, you're obviously not an expert."

- It's the guy at the Soup Plantation who thinks that just because there's a Sneeze Guard covering the salads 'n fixins [you like that? salads 'n fixins?], it's ok for him not to cover his mouth when he sneezes.

- It's the guy in the back of the line at the Post Office who was incensed that I, who was waiting patiently at the front of the line, was waited on first when one of the workers opened up a new window calling for pickups only. He actually said, "Come on now!" When the worker told him that I was obviously ahead of him, he compounded his douchewadholism by mewling, "But I was closer to your counter when you called it!"

SO AGAIN, I ASK, "WHO RAISED YOU?!!!!"

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