Here is my new video, for my semi-final round in the Pole SuperStar contest in NYC, which by the way, i guess i failed to mention, because of myspace being so slow and all, that i was chosen with only 9 others to go to the semi finals :)
We only had 2 mins to show more of our talents and creativity, hope everyone likes this, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE vote for me AUGUST 15th to SEPTEMBER 15th on the website:
www.polesuperstar.com
Hope you like it!!

check it out! I hope i make it! They only pick 6 to go to NYC, but I've wanted to compete so badly, i've worked so hard on training and endurance these past few weeks, I know there are many more tricks I can do, but i felt this performance, was more than just cool tricks or sexy moves, it was dancing and emotion, and I am happy with it, although i know i can offer more to the table if i get picked to go to NYC.
They wanted props,costume , makeup etc, so that is what the set-up was for, I always thought pole dancing make you feel like you were between two worlds, so I went for a haunting ghostly theme, also with the idea of the former self haunting you, i should know about that lol
Let me know what you think :)

check the new profile playlist song

Happiness
More or less
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
Oh, my, my
Happiness
Coming and going
I watch you look at me
Watch my fever growing
I know just where I am

But how many corners do I have to turn?
How many times do I have to learn
All the love I have is in my mind?

Well, I'm a lucky man
With fire in my hands

Happiness
Something in my own place
I'm standing naked
Smiling, I feel no disgrace
With who I am

Happiness
Coming and going
I watch you look at me
Watch my fever growing
I know just who I am

But how many corners do I have to turn?
How many times do I have to learn
All the love I have is in my mind?

I hope you understand
I hope you understand

Gotta love that'll never die

Happiness
More or less
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
Happiness
Coming and going
I watch you look at me
Watch my fever growing
I know
Oh, my, my
Oh, my, my
Oh, my, my
Oh, my, my

Gotta love that'll never die
Gotta love that'll never die
No, no
I'm a lucky man

It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
Oh, my, my
Oh, my, my
It's just a change in me
Something in my liberty
Oh, my, my
Oh, my, my

Being alone alot gives' you lots of time to think. About people, about the past and about what you want for the future.
And just when you think you have it all figured out in your nice little package with a bow you open it and it gives you nothing. And you start all over again, 'cause feeling something- even regret, pain, sorrow, anger is better than nothing.
But then , the older you get, you'll slowly begin to realize the nothing, isn't nothing at all, but a series of events, moments and images scattered into your brain, all arranged the way that only you view them, because life is all perception of only one person, the self.
And when you finally decide to make a change because things don't work out as planned, the plans are nothing but bullshit, and mindless reasoning, because nothing changes that moment you actually act and actually don't become a bullshitter and you are  your own thought process.
So hats' off to the bullshitters and hats' off to the people who have found happiness...
all of you are on my mind :)

Yesterday I had the greatest day with my sister, we had alot of fun and got to spend great quality time together hehehhe....
This morning i woke up to the sugar ants trying to carry me away again, so i dealt with them, cleaned up and dusted my fire place mantel that had all my lovely Asian memorabilia.
I was looking online for one of my favorite quotes from the book 'memoirs of a geisha' which, btw, i hate when someone see's my tattoos and is like "oh i watched memoirs of a geisha, i know all about them, weren't they prostitutes?"

They were not!
Not saying that none of them ever did slept with a man who was paying for everything that they ate, and wore, but that's also every arranged marriage, or married person in general right?
lol
ok, so I found my quote and cleaned, and i have been so putting off starting this painting that i have a base for, so I think i will start that tomorrow, but painting for is a very meticulous process for me.
So then luis told me if i painted this piece off of his bike I could get some money to go out this weekend, and every since sake on Saturday night, I've been dieing for some more, cause if anyone knows....
I use to work with a wonderful sushi chef and it was part of my job description to down large quantities of sake with fun people!
So i went outside and was attacked by love bugs, and had paint in my face and nails so i can have my sake memories.... lol
Here is a favorite song of mine from the movie 'memoirs of a geisha' :

listen to it! it sounds nothing like traditional Japanese geisha music, but... Its pretty and puts me in a happy mood
And fuels the fire that is my inner geisha; an artisan, poet, dancer, and entertainer of the heart

Here is the new pole video I've been working on, I am very excited about it, the YouTube community has been great and supportive. I'm really anxious to see the comments and views i get on it

xoxo

Anyone ever at any givin point in life are just in this funk of a mood where they feel like breaking stuff? I guess that is me in my state of whateverness. Maybe its just plain life that is boring me right now. Maybe i just miss performing, I got on the pole at my house last night while helping my friend out that I am teaching and had so much fun, I guess i just miss being the little cocky bastard that I am. But that's how shit goes I guess, you cant really learn anything if you stay in the same funk your whole life.
Good news is i'm going to start instructing students again, and that will be exciting, guess I'll just start out of the house and pro-mo on the weekends with some business cards.
Everything happens for a reason.
Even something that you thought was wrong,
Because sometimes it ends up being right.

<3
steph

I've been travelin on this road too long ,too long
Just tryin to find my way back home
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,
I've been travelin on this road too long
Just tryin to find my way back home
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,

No more stray now I'm straight,
Now I get it now I take time to think before I make mistakes just for my family sake,
That part of me left yesterday
The heart of me is strong today,
No regrets I'm blessed to say the old me dead and gone away,

I turn my head to the east, I don't see nobody by my side,
I turn my head to the west, still nobody in sight,
So I turn my head to the north, swallow that pill that they call pride,
That old me's dead and gone, but the new me will be alright,
I turn my head to the east, I don't see nobody by my side,
I turn my head to the west, still nobody in sight,
So I turn my head to the north, swallow that pill that they call pride,
That old me's dead and gone, but the new me will be alright, cause



I've been travelin on this road too long
Just tryin to find my way back home
But the old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,

I've been travelin on this road too long
Just tryin to find my way back home
The old me's dead and gone,
Dead and Gone,

I'll be packing up the computer probaly today, so i've come to say farewell! Good bye to those who I knew in Georgia, It's been a roller coster ride, and i'm glad I got off the cart.
To those of you who were there for me and mine, helped me and supported me I thank you, It it a very few people who I can think of in that group, but there are some.
To Sara, who has been a wonderful friend to me, seen me though all my endevors and supported me all the way. I thank you from the bottom of my heart  May God , the Goddess and Jesus protect you and your beautiful family. I will always keep you in my thoughts and prayers...
There are some string's i wouldnt mind tieing up, but I'll let what be... be so to speak. The wheel of life turns for us all. And I trust in the Goddess to sooth my and Luis' souls for the hardships we experienced while here.
We are still together.
We are still in love.
And we can still beat the odds.
So with that in mind I say....
Farewell Georgia....
I shall miss you- not so much

This is a wonderful move I love; it is great to watch with someone you love. This movie also adheres' to a few pagan beliefs' such as the ability to reincarnate, the Summerland, ones' visage in the after life, building of your personal 'heaven' in the afterlife by thought, and the basic idea (which not all pagan's adhere to , but some do) of what happens to suicides, and dark souls.(Although we do not believe in hell per say)


It's a great movie to have someone watch if they are curious about pagan belief's in what happens to one's soul in the afterlife and how heaven connects into all of this.
(Which not all will agree about that) But when dealing with Christian friends, family etc. I find visual learning is a lot easier than text and words sometimes...



Enjoy and Blessed Be to you.... :)









PART ONE





PART TWO





PART THREE






PART FOUR




PART FIVE





PART SIX





PART SEVEN






PART EIGHT





PART NINE





PART TEN




PART ELEVEN