Lesbians never cease to amaze me.  At least most of them, anyway.  I've always been in awe of those who move from one relationship to another in record time.  I've had dyke friends do this and I've watched, much like a tennis match, back and forth... but there's a different person on the other side of the net each time (with the occasional attempt at reconciliation with an ex here and there).

I've also been on the receiving end of this more than once and, as you might imagine, it's not fun.  I'm not perfect by any means (ok, I really am, lol), but the question begs to be asked:  what, in all honesty, do you have to offer someone when you're on the rebound?

The answer?

Nothing.

Well, except some hot sex, maybe.  That part is perfectly fine!  I'm not into one night stands or random hook-ups, but if you're safe, I don't judge those who are.  The flood of endorphins make everything seem all right for a while.  I get that.

What digs at me are those lesbians who ooh and ahh over a new woman less than a month after getting out of a relationship, without taking the appropriate time to reflect on why their previous one didn't work out, but most importantly to get closure.  It's all too easy to blame the other woman, to point your finger and say, "It's not MY fault, it's YOURS", and not take any responsibility just because the idea of the break-up wasn't a mutual one.

How can you go from essentially planning marriage, babies and a white picket fence (if not actually having those things) with someone to diving head first into the shallow end of another relationship?

Again, I ask: 

What, in all honesty, do you have to offer someone when you're on the rebound?

And again, I say:

Nothing.

In my opinion, you're not thinking straight (directional reference, not sexual preference) and you're just covering up and ignoring something that will only come back to bite you in the ass.

Really, I'm not bitter about this... I'm just... confused.

Do you ever have those days where all you wanna do is cry?   
Not really.

Do you often use negativity for attention?   
Um, no.

Would you prefer hardwood flooring or carpet in your future home?
Both, depending on the room.
   
Do you know the song I Know I Know I Know by Tegan & Sara?
Nope.
   
Do you ever pick your nose? Honestly.
Who doesn't at some point?
   
If you could paint the sky any colour, what would it be?
No need to change what nature has already perfected.
   
Is your house new or old?
Old.
   
Do you live on a farm, or in a development?
Uh, how about the city?
   
Do you live in the middle of nowhere?   
Hardly.

When you cross your legs, do you put left or right on top?
It's a mix, but mostly left over right.
   
When you put on a shirt, do you put your head or your arms in first?
Head first.
   
When putting on socks, which foot do you put a sock on first?   
Left.

Have you ever made a sock puppet?
Maybe when I was six years old. :p
   
Do you think that rap music is degrading to women?
Some of it.
   
Do you like old school rap, such as Salt n Pepa?
I do.
   
Direct TV or Dish Network?
Neither, thanks.
   
Why do you think so many people are scared of reptiles?   
Dunno. There's a phobia for just about everything.

Are you scared of reptiles?
Snakes, I guess.
   
Does anyone in your house play a musical instrument?
No.
   
Do you wear a belt? If so, what does it look like?
I have to or my pants fall off.  It's just a black leather belt.
   
Do you bruise easily?   
Yes!

What colour is your bath towel?   
I have more than one. :p

Do you watch Mad TV?   
No.

What about Saturday Night Live?   
Not regularly.

What is your honest opinion of Twilight?
Mediocre, at best, but not horrible.
   
Have you ever made out with the same sex?
It's what I do for a living. ;)
   
If you had the chance, would you move to California?
If someone else paid for it, sure.
   
What about Canada?   
Nah.  Too cold.

Have you ever been on a greyhound bus?
Yep.
   
Do you think PacSun is expensive or overpriced?   
Aren't those the same thing?

Can you sleep without something covering you?   
Yes.

Could you sleep without a pillow?
No.

Describe today in one word?
Pretty good.
   
How long until your next birthday?
Eight months.
   
Do you save the surveys you take?   
Only because they stay on my blog.

Are you listening to any music? If so, what?   
Not at the moment.

Does it bother you when people don't reply to you instantly?   
No.

Would you ever admit to being a slacker?   
Haha, I can be.

How far away do you live from the beach?
Too far.
   
Could you ever see yourself as a school teacher?
Yes.
   
Is success a journey or a destination?   
I would say both.

Have you ever attempted to do pinkie push ups?
I don't even know what thsoe are.
   
What is one thing that made you smile today?   
Certain thoughts.

Do you have a strong or weak stomach?   
I'd say pretty strong, but that's never been tested by seeing gushing blood or something like that.

What's worse - the waiting or the waiting room?
The waiting.
   
Is there anything in your pockets?   
Yes.

What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?
It's too damn early (it was 4am).
   
Do you get frustrated easily?
I can, yes.
   
List three colors you are wearing?
Dark blue, light blue and white.
   
Is your computer dusty?   
No.

Have you ever fallen out of a tree?   
No.

How many questions do you usually prefer on a survey?   
The really short ones are pointless.

Do you give your friends advice?   
If they want it.

Are your feet cold, currently?   
Nope.

Why do they call it a "puppy dog face", anyway?   
Because it's supposed to be sweet like a puppy's, I guess.


How many licks does it really take?
Hmm... I've found every girl is different. ;)
   
What is your favorite writing utencil?   
Gel pen, medium point, preferably blue.

Have you given any thought to who your Valentine is going to be?
Nope.
   
Did you yell at anyone today?   
No, I rarely yell.

Do your feelings get hurt easily?
Nope.  I'm rubber.

Some lyrics to end this survey, hmm?
"Underneath the corset of your mystery
Piece by piece, undress you from your history
I'm sleeping with seclusion in sweet disarray..."

How do you feel about yesterday?
Eh.
   
About today?   
It's a new day and I get a three day weekend, so I'm better.

Discribe your fondest memory:   
I have many, many fond memories... not any one in particular is better than another.

Is there anyone who talks to you on myspace/facebook that is annoying?   
Sort of. :p

Do you have a signifigant other?   
Not anymore.

When was the last time you saw your closest friend?   
Just under a month ago.

What song makes you cry every time you hear it?   
Used to be Congratulations by Blue October, but nothing lately does.

When was the last time you felt afraid?
I don't recall.
   
What time did you go to bed last night?   
Early!  I hardly slept the night before, so I was exhausted.  Happy hour helped, too.
   
How often do you break your promises?   
I try to not make promises I can't keep.

How long do you take in the shower, on average?   
10 minutes unless I'm shaving.

When was the last time you sang aloud?   
I rarely do that (and it's for the better).

Do you like your singing voice?   
Given my previous answer, what do you think?

Describe your mood in one word:   
Balmy.  Guess which meaning I'm referring to. :p

Do you have your myspace/facebook profile set to a friends only setting?
Some portions, yes.
   
Are you listening to music currently?   
Nope.

Do you miss anyone right now?   
Yes.

If so, whom?   
They know who they are.

What's your favorite word?   
Discombobulated is one of several.

Did your last kiss mean anything?   
Yes.

Do you know who Meg White is?   
No.

Do you play any sports? If so, which?   
It's been forever, but I play basketball, tennis and softball.

When was the last time you went to the mall?   
I guess with my sister and her hellions she calls her children in June.

When was the last time you were absolutely happy?   
It's been a little while...

Do you prefer cats or dogs?   
Dogs, but I love cats, too.

When was the last time you went to the doctor?   
Too long ago.

What's one of your pet peaves?   
People who can't spell. :P

Do you like playing board games?   
Yep.

Do you listen to more popular bands or more unknown bands?   
Both.

How hot is it outside?   
In the high 70s right now.

Have you ever been sung to personally?   
Yes.

When was the last time you ate?   
Around 10:30 this morning.

What's one of your flaws?   
I'm impatient.

Have you ever kissed in the rain?   
Yes.

Do you have a crush, currently?   
Ahh, no.

Do you ever think about other people?   
All the time.

Do you think you're brave?
To an extent.

Do you honestly believe that everything happens for a reason?   
Yes.

Do you think you're all that?   
And a bag of chips!

Have you ever deleted someone off your friend list?   
Who hasn't?

What was the last alcohol beverage you drank?   
Diet Coke and vodka.

What are you excited for?
My next vacation.
   
What is one thing that most people know about you?   
That I'm awesome.

If you could be somewhere right now, where would it be?   
Home.

What do people watch porn?   
Do you mean why?  Because they're dirty!

Are you one of those people?   

You're friends with someone who's the total opposite of you, what do you do?   
Relish it.

What's something about your life that most people know about?   
Hmm... that I'm a dyke.

What about most people do NOT know about?   
Nothing. I'm an open book.

Will you be in a relationship two months from now?   
I doubt it.

What was the last thing you laughed at?   
The maintenance guy for my office... we were joking around.

Do you tell people you're offended if they offended you?
Depends.   

What's stopping you from getting what you want right now?
Absolutely nothing. :p
   
Are you still friends with your elementary friends?   
No.

Why do you take surveys?   
Sheer and utter boredom.

What is confusing you right now?
Why some things don't work out.
   
Do dreams really come true?   
I suppose they can if they're meant to be.

What about wishes?   
Same as above.

Would it freak you out if you just won backstage passes to a concert?
Nah. Unless it was Pink!

Which is tackier: chipped balck nail polish, or over-bitten nails?   
I'm not sure I care either way.

Is your sense of humor crude (toilet, crotch) or highbrow (sarcasm, irony)?
95% "highbrow."  I have my crude moments, though.
   
When was the last time you built a sandcastle?   
I can't even remember.

If you HAD to change one physical trait, what would it be?
I'd weigh 20lbs less. :p
   
If you HAD to change one personality trait, what would it be?   
I wouldn't!  I'm perfect as is! :p  Seriously, I'd worry less.

What is the best part of your life?   
Everyday is.  I'm alive, right?

Do you care about Gun Rights laws?
It's not one of the laws at the top of my list, truthfully.
   
Do you like the game Monopoly? I never liked it as a kid...
I did and still do. :)
   
What do you think of skater kids?
They're expressing themselves the way they see fit.  I can't say anything negative as I really like the skater shoes.
   
Do you, yourself, know how to skateboard?
Nope.
   
You must live in a different country for one year. Where do you move?
Italy or Spain.  Lots of eye candy!
   
Do you believe that virginity is sacred?
For some, yeah.
   
What color are your eyes?
Green. :D
   
What is your living situation? (Who do you live with)
I've had the same roommate for just over three years.
   
Would you ever consider getting a facial piercing?
I already have one.
   
Ever pretended to have tourettes so you could scream obscenities in public?
Haha, no.
   
What was the last vegetable you ate?
Broccoli.
   
What time did you get up his morning?   
6am.

Who is your favorite teacher, and why?   
The teacher called Life. :p

Describe your favorite article of jewelery:
I guess my labret.
   
Are you wearing it right now?   
Constantly do.

What kind of smiley face do you type most often?
I type :), ;) and :p equally.
   
Do you add extra letters on the ends of your wordsss, likeee thisss?   
Fuck no.

What kind of MP3 player do you own, if any?   
A Zune.  I'm beginning to not really care for it.

Choose one: red, blue, or black pens?   
Blue. Medium point, gel ink or ball point, please.

Do you prefer pens to pencils? Why?
Nope.
   
How many pictures do you have on your MySpace/Facebook? (Estimate)
Several hundred. :p
   
Do you have a favorite letter of the alphabet?   
Not really.

Are your toe nails longer or very short?
Very short.
   
Do you listen to grunge music?   
Sure do.

Do you listen to 80's metal?
Here and there.
   
What about 90's pop?   
Here and there.

What do you think of today's music? (Popular, top 40, etc.)   
Some of it is really good.  Lots of catchy beats, just overplayed!

First and middle name of your future son and/or daughter:   
Jakeb Aleksander or Kelsey Sage  (I change 'em up).

Do you know how to use a fax machine?   
Lol, yes.

How often to you order pizza?
Not that often.
   
Do you have a favorite pizza chain?
Pizza Hut.
   
Explain one of your scars:   
The one under my chin came from diving into the shallow end of a pool when I was 9 or 10.

Are you happy with your hair?   
Now that the fuzzies on the back of my neck have been buzzed, yes. :)

Have you ever worn leather gloves? Were they fingerless?
No.
   
Do you think sea lions are cute?   
Yes.

Have ou ever touched a chinchilla?
No.
   
Have you ever been drunk?
Um, yeah, I'm 32.

Do you think underage drinking is irresponsible and stupid?
If you're trying to drive or you're unsupervised, yes.
   
As for yourself, would you say that you're a party animal?
Far from it.
   
Do you know the difference between 'their', 'they're', and 'there'?
Yes.  EVERYONE should.
   
Do you plan on graduating anytime soon?   
I did that waaaay back in 1995.  God, I'm old.

What is your favorite online game?
I don't have one right now.
   
Who do you idolize? (famous person, preferably)   
I don't.

Do you like acoustic or electric guitar better?   
Both.

When was the last time you laid out, under the stars?
Actually laid out under them?  Long time.
   
What are you doing tomorrow?
Working, unfortunately.
   
Current favorite song?
I have several.

How many keys are on your keychain??
Five, I think.

If you were given a canvas and watercolors, what would you paint?
A sunset.

What do you regard as the most repulsive form of music?
Death/Speed/Screamo/whatever it's called Metal.

Whose mind, besides your own, would you like to control?
Hmm, it's tempting thought, but I wouldn't actually do that.

What is the most dangerous occupation?
Um, no clue.

What is the first thing you do when you get out of bed?
Pee, then shower.

What do you consider the greatest threat to mankind?
Probably religion because in most cases it isn't practiced wisely.

If you could project yourself into the past, where would you go?
There are a few points I'd choose to live again - no sense in describing them, though. :p

What are you thankful you are not doing right now?
I'm thankful I'm not still at work.

What is your favorite kind of candy?
Probably Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.

What is your favorite thing about the beach?
Just about everything!

If you were invisible, where would you go?
The Oval Office when Obama's there.

What is one object in your home that you are embarrassed to own?
Nothing.

Fill in the blank; When I dance, I look like: You'd have to ask those who see me dance, honestly.

Who is one person you wish you would have never met?
I've learned something valuable from nearly everyone I've met.

What is your favorite fruit?
Fresh cherries, probably.

What is your favorite kind of cookie?
I have many.

If you were an evil dictator, where would you rule?
I could never be evil. :p

What do you need to get right now at the drug store?
Atkins Bars.

What song do you keep hearing over and over again?
I have Story of Your Bones by Jennifer Nettles and Save You by Kelly Clarkson on repeat lately.

What was the happiest age of your life?
I've had many at different points in my life.  Yeah, that's vague, but true. 

What is your favorite piece of clothing that you own?
My Gap 1969 jeans.

What two words describe your lifestyle?
Easy going.

Which ocean creature fascinates you most?
Dolphins.

On a scale of 1-10; how religious are you?
0.  I'm spiritual, not religious.

What historical figure would you most like to have a discussion with?
It's a tie between Ghandi and Martin Luther King, Jr.

What color looks best on you?
Dark blues and purples, I think.

What is your favorite thing about being sick?
Um, nothing.

Why are you here right now?
'Cause I was born?

What commercial do you find most annoying?
None at the moment.

What was your favorite meal growing up?
My father's homemade bread and pizza, oh, and saltine crackers in cold milk.

If you had to spend the rest of your life in one place, where would it be?
On a beach.

Fill in the blank; I am so much smarter than: I realize sometimes.

What one person or thing reminds you of the 80s?
Can't think of anything at the moment.

Where is the most beautiful place you have ever been?
There are so many places I know are beautiful, but haven't been able to experience.  One that comes to mind quickly is seeing DC from the top of the Washington Monument.

What body part aches you the most right now?
My back. :(

When is the angriest you have ever been?
When I got in a physical fight with my ex and tried to choke her. :p

What do you waste your time doing?
Being online too much.

On a scale of 1-10; how much do you trust people?
Depends.  By default, usually a 6 or 7, unless you're one of my best friends.

If you were forced to choose your own death, how would you die?
I don't know. Just make it really quick, please.

On a scale of 1-10; how photogenic are you?
LOL.  In *my* mind?  9! (I won't be completely egotistical.)

What aspect of your personality could use a little work?
I get too easily frustrated at times, so I guess that aspect.

What is your greatest addiction?
Breathing.  Followed closely by coffee.

What issue are you sick of hearing about?
Swine flu!

If you were a professional wrestler, what would your ring name be?
The Dyke.

What language would you like to master?
French and Spanish.

What is your favorite dish at a Chinese restaurant?
Crab rangoon, but that's not a "dish" per se, so I suppose sweet and sour chicken.

Who would you least likely expect a phone call from?
My father or my mother.

What is the longest you have ever gone without a shower?
Five days. Never again.

What is the saddest movie you have ever seen?
What Dreams May Come.

What time do you usually fall asleep?
It varies each night.

Where is the worst place to be stuck waiting?
In line for the restroom when you REALLY gotta pee!  This is why I use the men's restroom in most cases.

What is the cutest animal on Earth?
Pretty much all baby animals.

Name one celebrity that has no right being a celebrity.
I don't particular care one way or the other.

What hobby have you always wanted to pick up?

Knitting. :p

Some Randoms

What day is it today?   
Thursday.

Where did you go on your last vacation?   
Mississippi.

What were you doing yesterday at 7pm?   
I was at home, relaxing and watching Bones.

Have you rode in a car with anyone today?   
Nope.

Is it raining?   
Kinda.

Does your first name start with a 'T'?   
No. :(

'E'?   
No! :(

'A'?   
YES! :D

What will you be doing in 2 hours?   
I will be on my way home.

Have you ever been to Chicago?   
Yes, years ago.

What is the nearest blue object to you?   
My blue Tul ink pen.
   
Have you ever taken a French class?   
Yes, that's all I took in high school and college.  Too bad I barely remember any of it.

Do you work at a fast food restaurant?   
I don't now, but I have.

What was your first kiss like?   
With a boy?  Icky.  With a girl?  Terrifying.

Are you the middle child?
Nope, I'm the oldest.
   
What would you do if you woke up and were the opposite sex?
I'd play with my thingy!
   
What jewelry are you currently wearing?   
My labret and the ring on my right index finger.

What would your name be if you used your mom's maiden name?   
I already have my mother's maiden name.


Have You Ever

Recieved a drunken phone call:   
Who hasn't?

Called in sick to work when you weren't:   
Again, who hasn't?

Worked at Wendy's:   
Yes.

Worked at Subway:   
No.

Worked at Walmart:   
No.

Worked at a gas station:   
Yes.

Kissed someone who's name began with 'C':   
Yep.

Hugged someone named 'Aaron':   
Yes.

Dated someone named 'Holly':   
No.

Introduced yourself by a name other than your own:   
Online, yes.

Given someone a fake phone number so they couldn't call you:   
Haha, yes.

Owned a gerbil:   
No.

Kept a New Year's Resolution:   
Yes.

Lived with a boyfriend/girlfriend:   
Yes.

Broke off an engagement:
No.
   
Held a friend's hair back when they were throwing up:   
Yes.

Had a 'paranormal' experience:   
Not really.

Been in a cemetary at midnight:   
No.

Found a four leaf clover:   
Yes.

Been hit on at work:   
Yes.

Been 'just friends' and then let it go too far:   
Yep.

Written a letter to a celebrity:   
Yes.

Been to Europe:   
No.

Knew someone was using you, but let them do it anyway:   
Yes.

Been a witch for Halloween:   
No.

Dyed your hair an unnatural color:   
Yes, I think black looked unnatural on me.

Done something just because you were 'of age' to:
Sure.
   
Gotten a speeding ticket:   
Yes.

Found a hair in your food:   
Yes.

Wished at 11:11 and had your wish come true:   
No.

Had a pair of lucky socks:   
No.

Had a secret admirer:   
They never revealed themselves, if so.

Fainted from nervousness during a public speech:   
No, but I do kinda break out in hives when talking to a group of people. :/

Been in volleyball:   
Yes.

Basketball:   
Yes.

Football:   
No.

Done something you always told yourself you would never do:
Who hasn't?
   
Dated someone in the military:   
Yes.

Been in a wedding party:   
Yes.

Cried for no reason:   
There's always a reason.

Been sick on your birthday:   
Not that I recall.

Been on a motorcycle:   
No.

Been skiing:   
No.

Been skinny dipping:   
No.

Accidentally flashed someone:   
Sure.

Used a fake i.d.:   
If using Tabitha's Universal Studios pass to get in the park free counts, then yes.

Broken an arm:   
No.

Wished on a shooting star:   
Yes.

Called in a song on the radio and dedicated it to yourself:
Ha, no.

An elementary school teacher gave her first graders a coloring assignment. The sheet of paper contained an outline of different objects like a house, trees, sky e.t..c and the children were asked to color each of the objects with the appropriate color. Patty worked really hard on her assignment but when she got it back, she was surprised to see a big black “X” on it. When she asked the teacher for an explanation, the teacher said “I gave you an “X” because you didn’t follow the instructions. Grass is green not grey. The sky should be blue and not yellow as you have drawn it. Why didn’t you use the normal colors Patty?”

Patty answered, “Because that’s how it looks to me when I get up early to watch the sunrise.”

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine

-Pablo Neruda

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