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Amy Gifford


Last Updated: 2/5/2010

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Gender: Female
Status: Swinger
Age: 23
Sign: Virgo

City: ROCHESTER
State: New York
Country: US
Signup Date: 3/10/2005

Blog Archive
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[22 Jul 2009 | Wednesday] 
i'mmmmm bored.
so i figured i'd write a blog, even though i have nothing to say, and noone ever reads it!
woo hoo!
=)


rob + nikki's wedding was saturday, it was amazinggggggggg!
i can't believe they're finally married
they're really just too perfect for eachother =)
i remember years ago when rob was discussing asking nikki out...he was so scared!
haha i can't believe there was a point in time when people actually asked ME for romantic advice lmao.

can i just sayyy that weddings + alcohol + exboyfriend = stuff that probably shouldn't have happened?  ::blushes::
ohhhhhhhhhh well,
what can ya do?

i don't plan on being stupid again and falling for him.
i don't know if there's anything he could do to prove to me that he's changed;
and as much as he says he wants to; i don't think he has the motivation to spend much time proving it to me;
so i don't plan on really having anything to worry about in that sense.
but then again, i didn't plan it last time.
and he really is the only person that's ever made me happy, relationship wise.
and i'm not gonna lie, if i could trust him 100%; i'd still probably be with him for the rest of my life.
BUT then again (again), even the idea of falling in love again (especially with him when it took me so damn long to finally get over him) creeps me out and pisses me off, sooo maybe there won't be anything to worry about.
i don't believe in the concept of "forever love" anymore..
i don't think that there are any two people in our generation who are completely perfect for eachother and would never cheat on eachother and could really be the other persons one and only for the rest of their lives.
that's not what society is based on anymore;
people are essentially taught from such a young age that cheating is acceptable,
and who am i to challenge that?
who am i to think that i'm important enough to be enough for someone;
or that anyone else is important enough to be my everything.
i just don't think it's possible.
sooo until someone can change my mind on that;
i think i'm perfectly content with not being in a relationship anytime soon (or ever),
and just kindaaa...swinging.
and don't take that in the way it probably sounds hahaha


...i hope he doesn't read this before our lunch date tomorrow (or thursday?), i'd really like to discuss that with him one-on-one hahahaha
ohh well.
no rest for the wicked, right?
:-P

haha woww
i just started taking this "guilty or innocent" quiz to kill some time...until i realized that i was answering guilty to EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM.  stuff likeee... Ever kissed someone of the same sex, Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on, Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry, etc.  those aren't any fun to take when every answer is the same...!


So i finished watching Doctor Who and Torchwood that i had my brother download for me, and thennn Torchwood had its first episode in like, 15 months.  It was a week long episode and it was fucking awesome; except for the fact that it feels like they've destroyed any chance of another season (which is supposidly still being discussed).  At the end of the last season they killed off Owen and Tosh, and then at the end of this week long gimmick they killed of Ianto!  so now there's only 2 characters left (3, if you count Gwens husband), and I really don't know how much they can do with that.  Unless they go back in time and have the Doctor fix everything...mwahaha.  Speaking of, Doctor Who is set to have a Christmas episode and then return for another season in 2010; BUT they're replacing David Tennant with some new guy!  LAME!

...when did i become such a sci-fi geek?
meh, i guess i always kinda was; being that my favorite tv shows before this were Dark Shadows, Lost in Space, Buffy, + Angel (+ days of our lives, they had an alien storyline, i guess they can be considered sci-fi!)

I have been drinking all night and watching this video. TOTALLY WORTH IT:



my throats all swollen and ouchy =(
i hope its not my thyroid acting up even more.
as of now the doctors are likeee 80% sure i'll have to get it taken out.
that goes along with the 100% chance that i'll have to get gum surgery;
and the 50% chance i'll have to get spine surgery.
FUCKING AWESOME!!!
maybe i'll just get 'em all done at once...do you think they'd do that?


Alright, off to take my puppy for his walk before it starts pouring again and then I'm going to crash on the sofa with Season 1 of "30 Rock." Oh, Tina Fey. The crazy hot sex I would have with you


















[04 Jul 2009 | Saturday] 
I'm still so ridiculously bummed about Michael Jackson.
I was realllllyyyy hoping that I'd get to see him preform live before he died...
and I wished that he'd still be making killer music for decades to come.



His public funeral was today.
I kept hoping that he'd jump out of the casket and that it'd just all have been a big publicity stunt.
I pretty much sobbed throughout the entire thing;
but this part completely broke me =(


Hes such a huge star and lived his life so publicly, that sometimes it's easy to forget that he had a personal life as well...and three beautiful children who have to live the rest of their lives without their father.

On a more positive note,
the man had the most sweet, infectious laugh i've ever heard


There will never be another man with even half as much talent (no matter how hard Justin Timberlake tries).
RIP MJ
The one, The only, King Of Pop.
[14 Jun 2009 | Sunday] 
What the fuck is Twitter? 
I have one.
I don’t know why. I have no idea what it’s for.
I have no friends on it cause I’m a loser.
And I don’t want to be that person that follows all the celebrities cause then I look like more of  spazz.
I looked  into what was the purpose of it was.
And it’s to say what you’re doing. 
I thought that was what Myspace was made for.
Every time you go on myspace everyone has their “what you’re doing” thing going. Why do we need a whole different site?
So I joined twitter a few days ago.
No friends.
Loser.
And I updated once.
And that’s all I’ll ever do. Cause if I want ppl to know my business I do what a real person does and broadcast my life to myspace. 
All the celebrities have a twitter too.
And then that’s like no…that’s what Perez Hilton’s for.  You’re putting that poor Cuban out of a job. Stop it. You’re not even gonna need a publicist cause you’re doing everything so well yourself with your fucking twitter.

Anyway,
that's really all that I wanted to say.
I'm gonna go watch some Doctor Who and then go to bed.
I think I'll delete my twitter first.
Bastard.
[30 Mar 2009 | Monday] 
easter Pictures, Images and Photos

its almost easterrrr
i can't wait for the peanut butter easter bunnies!

OK, I don't know how that happened. I went to my room to get some moisturizer, because my hands were feeling a bit dry after a shower,
and now I find myself unmoisturized, and I'm drinking a beer. ...How?
How can I not account for my actions once AGAIN? What exactly have I
been doing? I went to work, came home, took a shower, ate some soup, then I sat down on
here, and... next thing i know, i'm drinking a beer. I hate it when this happens, when I do stuff and totally
don't remember how it came to pass. I should totally have another go at
getting that moisturizer (my hands are feeling really really dry now),
but I dread to think what'll happen next. I'll probably come out of my
room wearing a balaclava and a t-shirt badly scrawled with the slogan
"this here bus is going to MEXICO!". I need to sort this out. As an
aside - this beer is very tasty. It's Bud Light Lime, which definitely reminds me of summer.  I needed a reminder that summer is, in fact, right around the corner...despite the fact that it was SNOWING today!  ick.

anywayyy speaking of beer; i'm desperately trying to find a bartending job, but nooooooo place is looking to hire someone who doesn't have experience!  help!!  seriously, can anyone in rochester hook me up with a bartending job?  even if it's only likeee a night a week at a shitty run down bar; at least then i'd be able to put down that i have legit bartending experience on applications!



I had a weird dream last night, it was seriously all action. I
dreamt that I and my friends were so desperate for money because of the
recession that we decided to rob a bank, but things went wrong and we
had the cops on our tail. We were all tearing around greece at high
speed trying to get away from them, and attempted to cross the stutson st bridge (which was closed at the time for repairs), at which point I
lifted myself out of the car through the sunroof, and attempted to
delay the cops in pursuit by throwing a smoke grenade into their path.
Unfortunately for me, the cops had put an armed response unit on both
bridges, and as soon as I climbed onto the roof they hit me with a
hail of gunfire, killing me outright, and leaving my horrifically
Swiss-cheesed body slumped on top of the car. I would say that most
dreams would end here, but this one carried on, where I got to be a
ghost for many years afterwards, not really accepting that I was dead,
following my friends about, trying to talk to them even though they
couldn't see or hear me. It went on like this for ten years, everyone I
know ageing whilst I stayed exactly the same, their lives changing
beyond recognition whilst I was stuck in the same limited routine. One
day I was checking up on a friend as she was about to go out to work,
when she caught sight of me in the reflection of the mirror, though
when she turned around in fright, she couldn't see me. The
acknowledgement of my presence was enough however, and my essence
dissipated into nothingness, and I finally got my rest.

i usually don't like dreams in which i end up dead; but this one was pretty fascinating.

Myspace seems to have been invaded by Twitter. Get it away! I'd
like some fully constructed paragraphs and well formed thought
processes on my bulletin page, please! If I want Twitter, I'll go on
Twitter, ok?

i can't think of anything else to write!  this was a pretty pointless blog.  except for the job thing!  someone get me a job!!!


[03 Mar 2009 | Tuesday] 
funny Pictures, Images and Photos

*sigh*
i needed a smile.
today is one of those days where i wish i'd never gotten out of bed.
today i...
- lost my keys (my mom eventually found them)
- forgot to bring my work clothes to work (so i had to buy new clothes on my lunch break -- the first half of my shift was a cleaning shift so i was in scrubs)
- threw up 3 times at work.
- had my parents take my dog to the vet ... and found out that he has swollen anal glands which could very well mean he has a tumor  :(
the vet took some tests + said he'd call me as soon as he got the results.
i'm so scared :(
that's my little boy...i love him more than i think i could ever love anyone.  he's the closest to a child that i'll ever have.
and for christs sake, he's still a baby!
he just turned 2 yesterday!
he's too young to have cancer...
i hope :(
i'm hoping that its just a really bad infection.
the doctor said that his glads were swollen 4x the normal size
i hate watching him squirm around in so much discomfort...i've tried everything i can think of to help him + given him all the pills + creams the vet gave me + i just don't know what else to do.
i feel so helpless
and he looks so sad :(

Underoath lyrics Pictures, Images and Photos
I've really started to hate my job.
It makes me a bitch.
i'm always in such a bad mood there, between tony + asshole customers...and i wind up taking it out on everyone.
blechhh.
i really should find a new job (one that pays more than 7.70/hour!  after being there for nearly 3 years, you'd think i'd be making way more than that)
...but i'm just so damn comfortable there.
oh my life.

photography Pictures, Images and Photos
Why don't the newscasters cry when they read about people who die
At least they could be decent enough to put just a tear in their eyes
Mama said
It's just make believe
You cant believe everything you see
So baby close your eyes to the lullabies
On the news tonight


Is it okay that i think Jack Johnson is a genius?
coz i do.
He has an incredible voice too.

it's getting kind of hard for me to focus..my puppy keeps whining and i have to stop him from licking his bum because if he does then he'll lick the medicine off of it +
by the time i get oreo to settle down i'll have forgotten completely what i was writing about...so sorry if my topics jump around a bit.

White ducks aint got no hops [niggas/niggers] Pictures, Images and Photos
Aside from today, things are going on good, but there are also other things that've been
hurting me quite a bit.
I don't know if it is really my fault, or their
fault, or is it  just a phase that I have to go through at this point
of time.
Sometimes, I rather be alone and do things for my own which
people think can be rather selfish.
But if I care too much about other
people, then who is gonna care for me??
I feel like I don't get what I
deserve from the people who are supposed to show alot more concern.
I
admit I have my own flaws.
And so do they.
They can't just blame me coz
firstly, I think they expect too much.
And trust me, I am not gonna
give in to people who are obviously in the wrong.
I know this very well,
its complex but I'm sticking to it.
I'm sorry if I hurt you, but at
this point of time, I'm gonna go my own way coz I have to decide on my
own happiness.


colorful hair Pictures, Images and Photos
this is completely off any form of topic;
but i'd absolutely love for my hair to look like that!

Arlene had her baby yesterday.
i'm so excited and happy for her and Casey!
they're gonna make such incredible parents.
not to mention...alexis is ridiculously beautiful =)

light graffiti Pictures, Images and Photos
I caught Hard Candy on HBO last night.
i'd already seen it before so i knew what to expect;
but that made watching it again so much better.
it's such a great, psychological thriller, with a ton of creepiness..
i love how it reinforces the importance of never meeting internet people by yourself..you ever know what you'll get yourself into
(so for everyone on here who keeps saying that they'd "loveeeeeeeeeeee to meet up with me!".. go watch this movie and you'll see why i keep telling you no.

Photography Pictures, Images and Photos
it's not the end of the world
it's just the middle of the night


Nature, Landscape, Art Pictures, Images and Photos
Demetri Martin is probably my favorite comedian, and because I like him
so much I have posted some of my favorite jokes/quotes that he has
said.
He's
really great and I think anyone of my myspace friends will "lol"
at at least one of these jokes.

- "The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades"

- “I like video games, but they’re really violent. I’d like to play a
video game where you help the people who were shot in all the other
games. It’d be called ‘Really Busy Hospital.’”


- Graffiti… I don’t like graffiti, unless it teaches me something, you
know? Like “Oh, that’s how Alex feels about Maria. I wouldn’t have
known if I had not walked by there, thank you.” Graffiti’s the most
passionate literature there is, you know? It’s always like “Bush
sucks!”, “U2 Rocks!”. I want to make indifferent graffiti. “Toy Story 2
was okay!” “I like Sheryl as a friend, but I’m not sure about taking
things further”, “This is a bridge!”, “That guy’s right!”


- “When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws. Only catapults.”

- “I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that’s 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says ‘go outside.’”

- "I like to use 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' on my toast in the
morning, because sometimes when I eat breakfast, I like to be
incredulous. How was breakfast? Unbelievable"

- “I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I’m good at everything.”

- "I
like the beach. I like to get there really early before everyone else
shows up and take like thirty bottles with notes in them and throw them
into the water. Then I wait for everyone to come to the beach and when
someone goes to pick up one of the bottles, I go up behind them because
when they open it there’s a note saying ‘I’m standing right behind
you.’”


oohhhh man, good times.
holy shit i'm bored.
but i guess thats what happens when i'm sick + i have a sicker puppy to attend to<3

winter Pictures, Images and Photos
winter winter go away
come again...
...well...
never.
never would be nice.

Amy Gifford [adjective] --
Sexually stunning

well, that was accurate.
;)

underwater Pictures, Images and Photos

oh, hahah i don't know why i didn't think to write this earlier, but, i woke up in the
weirdest way ever this morning. I woke up at 6, because i was cold. i
couldn't figure out why. I opened my eyes + saw that i had somehow
kicked off all 5 blankets, along with my PANTS somehow in my sleep! i
was so weirded out by that.

oh and i leared the weirdest thing today!   didyou know that the cigarette lighter was invented BEFORE the match was?!
how insaneeee is that?!

sunsets Pictures, Images and Photos
if someone would like to buy me something
(don't lie, i'm sure you all do!)
i really want this
http://www.fredericks.com/product.asp?catalog_name=Holiday2002&category_name=Clothing-Short+Sleeve&product_id=70828&cookie_test=1
like really, i think i've fallen in love with it.

so people everywhere have randomly been bringing up politics lately;
and there are a few things i need to get off of my chest...
To those who think Obama is going to fuck over the country because he's a "socialist":

Yeah,
I guess I'm a socialist too because I actually care about education
funds, health care, welfare and social security. MY BAD. Because you
know no one cares about the impoverished black mother living in the
slums who works two jobs to support her family yet can't even afford
groceries sometimes, because she's just lazy

Obviously
I'm the devil because I refuse to let someone tell me what can and can
not come out of my vagina, what my children will and will not learn in
school and who I can and can not marry.
OBVIOUSLY.
i've been getting criticized left + right for having voted for obama (like i'm the only one, and i single handedly voted him in office myself) because he hasn't done anything huge that solved all of americas problems yet. 
its' really fucking irritating me.
go to hell.

shadow Pictures, Images and Photos

Once on a yellow piece of paper with green lines
       he wrote a poem
And he called it "Chops"
       because that was the name of his dog
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
        and a gold star
And his mother hung it on the kitchen door
        and read it to his aunts
That was the year Father Tracy
       took all the kids to the zoo
And he let them sing on the bus
And his little sister was born
      with tiny toenails and no hair
And his mother and father kissed a lot
And the girl around the corner sent him a
      Valentine signed with a row of X's
      and he had to ask his father what the X's meant
And his father always tucked him in bed at night
And was always there to do it

Once on a piece of white paper with blue lines
         he wrote a poem
And he called it "Autumn"
         because that was the name of the season
And that's what it was all about
And his teacher gave him an A
         and asked him to write more clearly
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
         because of its new paint
And the kids told him
        that Father Tracy smoked cigars
And left butts on the pews
And sometimes they would burn holes
That was the year his sister got glasses
       with thick lenses and black frames
And the girl around the corner laughed
       when he asked her to go see Santa Claus
And the kids told him why
        his mother and father kissed a lot
And his father never tucked him in bed at night
And his father got mad
        when he cried for him to do it

Once on a paper torn from his notebook
        he wrote a poem
And he called it "Innocence: A Question"
        because that was the question about his girl
And that's what it was all about
And his professor gave him an A
        and a strange steady look
And his mother never hung it on the kitchen door
        because he never showed her
That was the year that Father T racy died
And he forgot how the end
        of the Apostle's Creed went
And he caught his sister
        making out on the back porch
And his mother and father never
kissed
        or even talked
And the girl around the corner
       wore too much makeup
That made him cough when he kissed her
       but he kissed her anyway
       because that was the thing to do
And at three A.M. he tucked himself into bed
       his father snoring
soundly

That's why on the back of a brown paper bag
       he tried another poem
And he called it "Absolutely Nothing"
Because that's what it was really all about
And he gave himself an A
and a slash on each damned wrist
And he hung it on the bathroom door
          because this time he didn't think
          he could reach the kitchen



rain Pictures, Images and Photos
i don't know what else to talk abouttttttttttt...

LAST:
:x: movie you rented = it's been awhile.. i think it was Sweeney Todd; + Hedwig And The Angry Inch for me + megans Double Musical Movie night.
:x: movie you bought = The Alias first season box set <3
:x: song you listened to = john mayer - your body is a wonderland
:x: song that was stuck in your head = brand new - okay i believe you but my tommy gun dont
:x: cd you bought = ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i don't know, i don't really buy cds anymore :(
:x: cd you listened to = prolly a mix cd.
:x: person you've called = jasmine
:x: tv show you've watched = recess on disney ... <3 gotta love recess
:x: person you were thinking of = jasmine, coz she was mentioned a few questions ago lol

DO...
:x: you think about suicide = i think almost everyone thinks about at one point or another
:x: you believe in online dating = i like to 'keep it real' thanks.
:x: you want more piercings = i want lots + lots of piercings...i'm just too scared to get them haha
:x: you drink = yes'm
:x: you do drugs = nah
:x: you smoke = nope.

FOR OR AGAINST...
:x: long distance relationships = noo, it practically never works out.
:x: using someone = nah. lame-oh. unless they deserve it. hah.
:x: killing people = oh definately for! lets all go around killing people! whheeee!
:x: teenage smoking = *shrug* whatever creams yer twinkie.
:x: premarital sex = eh, use protection. hah
:x: driving drunk = hypocritial of me to say this, but definately against.

:x: gay/lesbian relationships = derrrrr.  i <3 my gays.

HAVE YOU...
:x: ever cried over a guy/girl = who hasnt?

:x: ever lied to someone = of course.
:x: ever been arrested = I'm a good kid. O:-)

NUMBER...
:x: of times you have been in love? = once.

:x: of times you have had your heart broken? = 5302532 times by the same guy.
:x: of hearts you have broken? = enough.  oops.
:x: of drugs taken illegally? = *shrug*
:x: of people you would classify as true friends, that you could

trust with your life =
not sure.  i'm guessing i could probably count them on one hand, though.
:x: of people you consider your enemies? = i duno, i think i'm over the whole "enemy" thing.
:x: of things in your past that you regret? = many many things...

FAVORITE...
:x: scent = VS so in love; which they don't make anymore!  gggrrrr.
:x: word = cunt.  because its the only word that still gets shock value when used.  and euphoria. its so pretty.
:x: eye color = blue eyes.
:x: flower = orange + white roses.

:x: piercing = i love lip rings.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...
:x: pretty = pretty ugly
:x: funny = i can make myself chuckle maybe a few times here and there. + usually those are moments when no one else laughs.
:x: hot = hot shit pshhh biatch pleeazzeee. or not.
:x: friendly = if i like ya.
:x: amusing = i am easily amused, therefore, i am amusing.
:x: loveable = i hope?
:x: pessimistic = yeah from time to time.
:x: optimistic = see above. i guess i could go halfway. my glass is not half empty or half full. it is half. yes.
:x: caring = i try
:x: sweet = i try
:x: dorky = hah yes.

:x: Spell your first name back wards: i am going to spell my whole name
backwards, coz my first name is short :o( droffig naej yma. yes. It
sounds like nasal spray.ew.
:x: The story behind your user name: xpaczbaybe = screen name.
:x: 4 words that sum you up: I'm Amy Jean Gifford.

DESCRIBE YOUR FAVORITE...
:x: Wallet = full of coupons, mainly for dog food.
:x: Toothbrush = white electric. yeah oral b.
:x: Jewelry worn daily = my chad bracelet...

:x: Pillow cover = i've got about 30 pillows and they all have different colors.
:x: Blanket = i have a million blankets.
:x: Coffee cup = i don't make my own coffee. I purchase some.
:x: Sunglasses = uhm, my purple ones that i never wear. i had pink ones. they broke. :-(
:x: Shoes = hm. lots? most worn: pink converses. red sketchers.

:x: Handbag = my black one from charlotte russe! ((kennedy: "amy, i
thought you didn't use real leather!" me: "dude, it was 10 bucks"
kennedy: "WOAH! DO THEY SELL LEATHER COATS THERE TOO?!! I COULD AFFORD
ONE THEN!" ahahah, gotta love pleather.))
:x: Favorite shirt = my black sleeveless one w/the white sparkley skull + crossbones + the pink bow!
:x: Listening to right now = Thrice - "In Your Hands"
:x: What you are wearing now = pjs!  soft purple pants, pink tank + my WilliamControl hoodie :)
:x: Hair = down + blah.
:x: Make-up = none @ the moment. i look like a train wreck :-)

WHO or WHAT (was/is/are) ...
:x: In my mouth = my tongue.
:x: In my head = a brain. maybe.
:x: Wishing = i hope i become rich + famous. like, now. thanks.
:x: After this = sleeping.
:x: Talking to = texting mike + jessie
:x: Person you wish you were with = davey havok.

:x: Something you're looking forward to = my doggie being better??
:x: Something that you are deathly afraid of? = spiders + bees. + heights. + airplanes. +...i'll stop.
:x: Do you like the taste of blood = um no thanks. ill pass.
:x: Do you believe in love = i (dont) believe in a thing called love
:x: Do you believe in soul mates =  nah.  i mean, what if there were soulmates...and you dont meet them?

:x: Do you believe in love at first sight = depends. if you mean by
looks no. but if you're walking by and this guy smiles at you with a
dorky grin and uses a really cheesy pickup line ((like "hey baby i lost
my number can i have yours?")) just to be a dork and get a laugh. hah
maybe.
:x: Do you believe in God = i'll believe it when i see it.
:x: What do you want done with your body when you die = creamated + donate the organs + crap.
:x: Who is your worst enemy? = idk.  i guess there are plenty of people i'd kick in the cunt
:x: If you could have any animal for a pet = a koala!! + a white tiger w/blue eyes!
:x: Ever been to Belgium? = not in this life.
:x: What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to? = NYC, Orlando, Hollywood, Honalulu, Miami
:x: What's something you wish you could understand better? = everything.

ok thats it, bye.
cloud Pictures, Images and Photos


[29 Jan 2009 | Thursday] 

So...
i ventured out to Wegmans today to get some food for my puppy.
On the way there, this bitch runs a stop sign, almost t-bones another car, and made
ME have to stop in the middle of everything, and watch these two pull
their heads out of their asses and move the fuck on.

Well the
bitch that ran the stop sign... you'll never guess what SHE was
preoccupied with... yep, talking on her fucking phone. Never fails...

Oh wait, did I mention she had her BLUETOOTH EARPIECE IN!!???   Oh yeah...  both hands free as fuck.

As
a matter of fact, it was GOOD she had both hands free, because with one
hand still on the wheel, (surprisingly) she was able to use her FREE
hand to cover her stupid mouth, in the universal sign for "oops, I
fucked up."

So see, handsfree IS the way to go! So now when
terrible drivers almost kill someone because they're on the phone, they
have a free hand to give the "oops" sign, or smack themselves in the
forehead, or whatever it is stupid people do.

Way to go guys... this law's DEFINITELY working.



[05 Dec 2008 | Friday] 
Before the end of 2008, you and I should ________ !

:)



[26 Sep 2008 | Friday] 
i've been spending some time thinking about what i want.

so, in wonderful sing-along lyrics everyone can enjoy;
here they are:

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 
I picked you out of a crowd and talked to you
I said I liked your shoes
You said, "Thanks, can I follow you?"
So it's up the stairs and out of view
No prying eyes
I poured some wine
I asked your name, you asked the time

Now it's two o'clock
The club is closed
We're up the block
Your hands on me; Pressing hard against your jeans
Your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out
You didn't care to know who else may have been you before

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck

Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I thought he said to meet him here but I'm not sure
I've got the money if you've got the time
You said it feels good
I said, "I'll give it a try."

Then my mind went dark
We both forgot where your car was parked
Let's just take the train
I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits
Some sad singers they just play tragic
And the phone's ringing and the van's leaving
Let's just keep touching; let's just keep... keep singing...

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk

Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I've got a hunger and I can't seem to get full
I need some meaning I can memorize
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind

But you, but you...

You write such pretty words
But life's no storybook
Love's an excuse to get hurt
And to hurt.
Do you like to hurt?
I do, I do

Then hurt me...
((Bright Eyes))
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I dont care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When Im not around
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special

((radiohead))

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You know me,
Oh you think you do you, you just dont seem to see
I've been waiting all this time to be
Something I can't define so let's
Cause a scene
Clap our hands and stomp our feet or something
Yeah something
I've just got to get myself over me
And I hate what I've become...

((the format))

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Help me...)
You tear down my reason
(Help me...)
It's your sex I can smell
(Help me...)
You make me perfect
Help me become somebody else

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

((nine inch nails))
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wont cry, no i won't cry
No i won't shed a tear
Just as long as you fuckin stand by me

So darlin, darlin stand by me
Won't you stand by me?
Won't you stand, won't you stand by me?
((Pennywise))


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

show me
show me
show me
how you do that trick
the one that makes me scream
she said
the one that makes me laugh
she said
and threw her arms around my neck

show me how you do it
and i promise you
i promise that i'll run away with you
i'll run away with you

spinning on that dizzy edge
i kissed her face and kissed her head
and dreamed of all the different ways i had
to make her glow
why are you so far away?
she said
why won't you ever know that i'm in love with you?
that i'm in love with you?
((the cure))

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Not so long ago
On his way home from work
He'd stop by the side of the road
Step out of that old beat up Ford
That he drove
And he'd walk around
Searchin' the ground
For a handful of wildflower blooms
Thinkin' of where he'd be soon
There with her
She called them redneck roses
'Cause that's what they were
A simple gift of love
From a country boy to his girl
((tracy byrd))


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Tell me I'm the only one
Tell me there's no other one
Jesus was the only son, yeah.
Tell me I'm the chosen one
Jesus was the only son for you
((smashing pumpkins))


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rollin down the street, smokin indo, sippin on gin and juice
Laid back [with my mind on my money and my money on my mind]
((Snoop Dogg))


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Money, get back.
Im all right jack keep your hands off of my stack.
Money, its a hit.
Dont give me that do goody good bullshit.
Im in the high-fidelity first class traveling set
And I think I need a lear jet.
((pink floyd))

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the city we tripped,
On the urge to feel alive,
But now I'm struggling to survive,
The days you were wearing,
That velvet dress,
You're the priestess,
must confess,
Those little red panties,
They pass the test,
Slide up around the belly,
Face down on the mattress
((Third Eye Blind))
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I alone am the one you dont know you need take heed feed your ego
Make me blind when your eyes close
sink when you get close
tie me to the bedpost
I alone am the one you dont know you need you dont know you need me
make me blind when your eyes close
tie me to the bedpost
((Eve 6))
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i swear to god i won't stop until your shakin
-trust me baby you know i want you to-
and let me slide into you please baby
-and if you're screamin, then i'm screamin too-
if you want it let me bring it, let me sneak into your house tonight
((Breathe Carolina))







any questions?






[22 Aug 2008 | Friday] 
this blog is probably going to skip around from thought to thought quite a bit.
my brain has been rather ADD the past few days;
i can't help it.
just a warning.


this past week has been one of the longest, and hardest, that i've ever been through.

Chad's funeral was this past Tuesday.
it was one of the saddest, yet most beautiful, things i have ever seen.
The church was PACKED.
literally.
standing room only, it was incredible.
he had so many people who loved him.
he touched more peoples lives than he ever could have imagined.
One of the first things that I noticed upon arriving was that all the drama that'd been going on was gone.
Things were back to normal;
just as Chad had been fighting for.
All the fighting among friends had stopped...for everyone learned that life is far too short.

seeing chad's body was so difficult for me.
it looked nothing like him.
chad was so full of life
moreso than just about anyone i've ever met...
seeing his body laying there seemed so surreal.
it's when it finally hit me that he was really gone.
i broke.

why do all the best people have to die young?
chad had such a good heart.
he cared SO MUCH about his family and his friends.
he was SUCH a good person;
and his life was cut so short;
and it's just not fair.
it's not fair he'll ever be able to get married
or have kids
and grandkids;
he wanted that so bad.

Chad was funny, and amazing...he lit up every room he walked into.
he always put others before himself
and the last time i saw him...minutes before he died;
i thought i was going to laugh until i cried from him making fun of the facial expressions KT + i were making while singing MmmBop.

I know i shouldn't;
but i can't help but feel guilt for having lived when he didn't.
everyone tells me that it's common...
"survivor's guilt" or something like that.
i know he wouldn't want me to feel this way...
he always said he'd protect me with his life...i just never thought it would actually come down to it.
i wish more than anything that it hadn't.

this week has been such a whilwind of emotions.
sometimes i feel like i'm going to be okay;
other times i'm completely paralyzed by sadness.
we spent a lot of time together the past few months...i'm so glad i got that chance.
he was the sweetest man
and it's so hard to imagine that someday i'll be okay...idk how i'm supposed to heal from this.

Everytime i see his picture, it's so hard to believe that i'll never see him again.
just sitting here now, thinking about him...i can practically hear his voice.
hear his laugh.
remember what he smelled like,
and how his eyes really did sparkle when he was happy.
those are things that i hope to god i never forget.


i don't know what else to say.


[14 Aug 2008 | Thursday] 
Webster woman charged with murder, driving into crowd, killing Greece man | democratandchronicle.com

Rochester police officers have charged a Webster woman with second-degree murder today after she drove into a crowd of people, killing one person and injuring four others.
    Sandra Arena, 48, was also charged with four counts first-degree assault, a felony, said Sgt. Mark Beaudrault of the Rochester Police Department.
    The second-degree murder charge means Arena is accused of acting under circumstances that displayed "a depraved indifference to human life," according to New York state penal law. That's considered a slaying that is so devoid of concern for human life that it rises to the level of intentional murder.
    If convicted, Arena would face a mandatory prison term of at least 15 years to life and no more than 25 years to life.
    She is slated to be arraigned in City Court at 9:30 a.m. tomorrow.
    Officers were initially called to the corner of Alexander Street and Broadway to break up a fight about 1:50 a.m., and while on the way, learned that a pedestrian was struck by a vehicle in the same area., said Lt. Wayne Harris of the Rochester Police Department.
    When officers arrived they found Chad Coleman, 22, of Greece pinned under the vehicle in a parking lot near the intersection, he said. Coleman was deceased.
Arena is also accused of striking four other people, who were all taken to Strong Memorial Hospital with injuries that were not considered life-threatening, he said.
    Arena was involved in an argument in Nasty D's Bar & Grill, 140 Alexander St., which then continued outside in a parking lot at 563 Broadway, Beaudrault said. It was not clear what the dispute was about or who Arena was arguing with.
Coleman was not involved in the dispute, but was in the wrong place at the wrong time, he said.
It was also not clear who Arena was aiming for when she drove into the crowd, Beaudrault said. Alcohol was not a factor in the incident, he added.
This morning, several people came to the scene, and to remember their friend, who graduated from Greece Olympia High School in 2003.
"We're hoping and praying for the families," said Crystal Henshaw, 28, of Penfield. "It hasn't hit a lot of us yet."
Henshaw said the man, her friend, was in his early 20s, and was a well-liked, generous and helpful man. He was also known for his love of music. He had auditioned for American Idol several times, and was "a phenomenal singer and dancer," Henshaw said.
"He was a sweet guy and everybody loved him" said Sabrina Wilbanks, 24, of Greece. "He will be sorely missed by anyone who knew him."
The women said that a candlelight vigil in their friend's memory will be held about 8:30 p.m. tonight in the parking lot where Coleman died.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

the vigil is at 8:30 tonight, in the Nasty D's parking lot, on the corner of Alexander and Broadway.

if you knew him, please come and show your love.



For all of those who sent me messages;
thank you.

i'll be okay.

i was released from the hospital around noon,
where i was then sent to the police station to fill out a deposition and have them take pictures of my injuries for her trial.

i have a concussion, a bruised kidney, a twisted knee, and a million cuts, bruises, and tire marks.

so in other words;
nothing that won't heal.

i was so lucky that for some reason;
the only thing i could think to do was cover my head.

the doctor said that's what saved my life.


so,
thank you to everyone who was concerned.

and i'll see you all tonight at the vigil.

<3

Photobucket
i love you chad.