How is it remotely possible that I average ten hits a day on this blog? I don't even have an average of ten friends a day in real life.

If you're reading, lemme know! So I can stare at the screen astonish-ed, wondering how the cryptic shit I had to say a year ago is relevant or interesting to anybody.


k?

there are so many parallels between what I've written and what's been said to me lately. Eerie, inn'it?

I just got some new-slash-used speakers and can finally listen to music again on my 'tron. Unfortunately there isn't any music left to listen to. Big fat chunks of who I am are missing. I'm gonna get whole, though.

The new bed comes today. Aggie and Winnie are rioting in my room so hopefully I can keep them out when the delivery guys get here. As if I weren't paranoid enough already I keep envisioning those early episodes of the kittens between mattress springs, just praying nothing gets poked or pierced. yikes.

shit's weird. there is bliss and there is misery all at once. I know misery sounds heavy but I'm pretty sure that's what it is. I don't really want to go back to school; part of me wants to work full time til I puke and hopefully THEN I'll want nothing more to turn to homework and lecture and loose leaf all the fuck over my apartment again.

I need to go to Chuck E. Cheese or something.

the first three weeks have flown by. I've been distracted by so much and now that it's finally time to feel my feelings, I wish they'd just go away.

a part of me is gone and I accept that it won't ever come back because this was a calculated choice of my own doing and I imagine in some crazy way, in years and years it will all make sense.

It doesn't feel like Christmas, and I imagine that's because for 3 years it was something completely different. Even though last year's was a little messy. I don't feel like I'm even at home. I guess you get used to certain people being your home. Your center when you spin away, right? I've decided to try to be my own home. I hope I get there.

People have called me worse things, I can deal with them not liking me. They weren't exactly what I'd call an "important" part of my life anyway. I still think their support will be way better than anything I can give you.

be amazing.

 

I've been here before. It still feels nauseating, it still feels lonely.

I think it's going to take a while to heal from this one, and I'm open to letting it happen.

November chews you up and spits you out.

shit godDAMN it was a good night.

possible job at Neon in the works. My future is bright and full of new clothes. Finally, I can own every Bench jacket ever made.

It occurred to me today that my "hey how are you guys" polite voice is abrasive, while my low-key, relaxed, possibly lesbianite voice is much more appealing to customers. I shall field test this further tomorrow.

I am not happy about Christmas fast approaching. I am not happy about presents or about family dinner or about coming home. I AM happy about Toronto and having a Chompsmas dinner and maybe making mass money in order to avoid going el broke-o.

GIRL skateboarding company is the stupidest name for any company ever. How are people supposed to know whether you want girl's clothes or GIRL's clothes? they won't. don't brush me up on brands, find a new name you poorly educated fash. designers. Seriously.

The babies are getting bigger and bigger and crazier. I've dropped 3 hund so far on shots and meds and poop samples. Poop samples, I said it. Roundworm is disgusting and expensive.

I dunno what else, but this blog has the general aura of "things nobody cares about". I'm posting it anyway, suckas!

I can safely say that whatever lingering "something" was there, has left the building and is never coming back.

Let's all applaud as I wave goodbye to another annoying tribulation.

eeeeyuck.

who are all these phantom viewers? Entering uninvited and not giving notice of their leave?

Justin Timberlake, if you're reading my blog right now: I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE your new album.

today has been THE assiest day in the history of days. Bombed a test, have to sit down with a teacher for a bloody hour for feedback, Winnie's sick I think, have LOADS of laundry and no money in my chequing account. my landlord tried to cash two rent cheques for this month, leaving me with nsf fees out the anouse. Now I've got to worm my way into getting the bank to credit it back to me because Good Life took out their first payment yesterday.

all seemingly minor annoyances piled on top of eachother to create the Megazord (mighty morphin-style) of all crappy times in the life of Chomps.

at the very least (and I mean least) I'll know exactly when things are going my way because I'll have an unfamiliar smile on my face. Relaxation? qu'est-ce que c'est?

nothing's crystal clear!

muck muck muck

Darjeeling was amazing. How does Natalie Portman have that ass when the rest of her is tiny like a ten-year-old? I wish man, I wish.

S'gonna be a good week.