In loving memory Herbert J. Ondrizek Feb. 27, 1993

 

To everyone please keep in mind that I was really young when I wrote this and for those of you that don't know me that well this is why I get depressed around this time of year and also in the month of February:

 

My Grandpa

 

My Gift of light goes to my grandpa. He has cancer. I think that my entire family didn't like it one little bit. My grandpa is trying to beat the cancer. I was shocked when I heard that my grandpa had cancer. When my grandpa had gotten cancer it affected me if he is going to die or not. I love jy grandpa a lot and I don't want hime to die. I want my grandpa to and I don't want him to die. I want my grandpa to and not die from cancer. There are different kinds of cancer, like colon cander and you could die from all of them if not treated in early stages of cancer. I want to become a doctor and make a cure for cancer. I want to all the people who have cancer. I want cancer to be cured and not be killing people. My grandpa died when I was in 6th grade and I was never the same from then on in my life, I wish he was stilll alive today because I never got to tell him that I loved him and my grandpa cried the night he died, I cried too because I didn't want him to die now, I wanted him to live 'til he was two hundred years old. I really miss him at Thanksgiving and all of the times my and I go up to see my grandma, I think my grandma was the worst affected by my grandpa dying that night three years ago and I got on the honor roll for my grandpa to remember him.

 

I love you and will always remember you.  I will always think of you when I hear November rain by Guns n Roses and Angel's Son by Sevendust.

 

I do believe that you would be happy with the choices that I have made in my life, even though I know you are watching us from up above,  I wish you could have met the friends that I have now and the man that I love.  I MISS YOU!!!!!!

Just so everyone knows this came from an email from my mom and her dream job is to be a wal-mart greeter (its a joke).

 

A very loud, unattractive, mean acting woman walks into Wal-Mart with
her 2 kids in tow. She was screaming obscenities at them all the way
through the entrance.
The Wal-Mart Greeter says, ' Good Morning and wlcome to Wal-Mart. Nice
children you have there--are they twins?'
The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say  'Hell no they ain't,
the oldest one is 9  and the younger one is 7.' Why the Hell would you
think they're twins? Do you really think they look alike?' 'No,' replies
the greeter. I just couldn't believe that someone would have slept with
you twice. You have a nice day now.'

If ya want to see something really funny click on this link.

I couldn't stop laughing.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4Y4keqTV6w

Ok....so I know that it has been a while since my last blog but I have been really busy the past couple of weeks.     So this past weekend was really interesting. Well I went to work and that was all fine and dandy. Well I had gotten two phone calls from a friend of mine that was asking me if I was going to go up to the firehouse on friday. Well I tried to call him back on friday night around 8pm and the line was busy...so I thought to myself he will probably be up there if he asked me twice in two days if I am going up there and sure enough he was there.  So, I started to drink my beers but before that a friend of mine and Jen's just turned 21 and Jen bought her a shot along with me and Jen to celebrate her birthday.  Well then I started drinking beer, ok.  Well later on in the night I was a little drunk and me and a few friends were talking and all of a sudden its down to me and one other person.  So he and I start talking and then we kissed....so now I am no longer single and very happy with him too.  And I know that I have left out along things but I honestly dont rememeber them.

Then last night I had to go into work at 9:30pm because we were having our floors re-waxed. So, yeah I thought that I was gonna be able to go home at 2am which was the time that I was scheduled to leave but nope that wouldnt be my luck. I was there until about 6:15-6:30 this morning. So I missed my first class of the day and didnt go to be bed until about 7am and woke up around 1:30-2pm and had to get ready for my evening class (couldnt miss that class, I had to take a test).

But, all in all the past four days have been really good. I actually havent been in a bad mood at all either which is a really good thing for me...especially when I am at work because that place can get a little nerve racking sometimes with some of my co-workers not doing what they are supposed to do or the money being wrong, but oh well.

So, I think that I am gonna end this now and watch some TV and then go to bed since I havent really slept much in the past day and a half now. So who ever reads this that I dont talk to that much (i.e. like a daily basis) knows that I am alive and kicking and doing very well now.   

 

any one that likes funny messed up humor check this website:

http://www.illwillpress.com/

this squirrel is the funiest thing ever!!!!!

*This room reminds me of solitary. *Wow, what did I eat last night that could cause a smell that bad? *I've just been treated for tapeworms. *I puked on the last person who sat next to me. *Check out this infected canker sore in my mouth! *I just had a proctology exam -- wow, worth every penny! *The voices in my head don't like you and wish you'd go away. *Have you ever thought of how many ways to use petroleum jelly? *If I go unconscious, just stick your finger down my throat -- that'll wake me up. *My butt reeeally itches! *Would you look at the size of this hair just yanked out of my nose! *I know we just met and this might seem a little sudden...but could I borrow two thousand dollars? *I used to have a real bad bedwetting problem...but the last few weeks I've gotten it under control. *Excuse me, can you pull my finger? *I haven't changed my underwear in over two weeks! How about you? *Oh damn, my diaper's wet again! *I think I farted! *Stop...I'm imagining you with personality. *Would you hold this soiled tissue for me? *Have you ever tried cat meat? Got this off of a t-shirt that i just bought at hot topic thought it was sooo funny!!

I see you so little But I talk to you all the time Then the question comes up Why do I care about you so much? There are so many things I want to say But one thing particular I know that you don't feel the same I wish I could see you more Sometimes, I wish I didn't think about you so much We have never fought And everyone says thats "great" or thats "awsome" But to me I want to know what you think I want to know what I think A lot of times I feel as though I have known you all my life There are things that you have done that I didn't know about but i knew them for some reason or another You know when I am upset You try to cheer me up You try to get me to smile And a lot of the times you do There are times when I wish you were here There are times when I wish you weren't I think I might have found "the one" but I don't know if he feels the same as me and I probably never will find out. Cause I am afraid oto say anything to him for fear of him walking away from me. "The heart does things that reason doesn't understand" -The Princess Diaries 2 ~punch 1/7/05

Ok before I get into what I wrote. I just want to say that this was inspired by a past ex-boyfriend and the song from Evanescence "My Immortal". I wrote this a long time ago and I figured that I would post it on my blogs. Why do you still live in my heart? After all these years You still haunt my dreams You still haunt my memories You still haunt my tears After all the pain and heartache I wish you never left I wish I never said good-bye After saying I love you I wish things could have worked out Sometimes I wish I never met you Sometimes I wish I never fell in love with you But you will always have my heart You made all my fears disappear You mad all my worries disappear Whyd do I still see you in my head and my heart? Why can I still hear your voice in the distance? Why can't I let your memory go? Why does it still hurt like it was yesterday? What can I do to let the pain go? When I hear this song I see you standing there infront of me again I picture myself in your arms again Smiling, laughing, talking to each other What do I have to do to feel this way again? When will the pain stop? When will your memory fade? When will I get over you? ~punch 6/6/04 Just let those who read this know. I have found a way to get over him and I have found someone who makes feel that way again.