Check out www.terrornightshaunt.com, to see a new promo short myself and the crew of 3 and 6 put together for a haunted house here in Tyler. After the 30 second animation plays, you can click through and watch the short. It was shot over a weekend last month inside the haunted house itself. I'm really pleased with it and its the start of a new phase of production over here.

Corey and I have started a new company, Happy Baby Productions, and we are swamped with work. It's a good problem to have, as I've had about $3 in my bank account for the last month or so. If you live in North Carolina, Kansas, Washington, Oklahoma, or right here in Texas, you'll be seeing commercials made by us truly.

As you can tell, I don't get on myspace very often anymore. I can tell you that I've never had so much work or worked so hard in my whole life, and its all leading to making some new shorts and hopefully a huge project next year.

I have some serious catch-up to do in the world of 3 and 6. Contest winners still don't have 'prizes', and there is still no hi-res download of 3 or 6 available. I considered putting a yousendit link here, but I think a download from the main site is the way to go and I'm working with my web guys on it. If anyone knows of a new site like stage6 i'd like to hear it.

I do owe an apology to the remaining people who were promised something and haven't gotten it. I pretty much royally screwed up the pricing of the T-shirts and it made it impossible for me to do all the extra shipping I had to do without taking out some sort of loan or robbing a liquor store. I am actively working on making sure you all get your stuff and things. I really appreciate your patience.

Meanwhile, 3 and 6 continue to entertain on youtube. We've apparently had another half a million views since spring. I forget sometimes that at any particular time someone in the world is enjoying them, and it makes it all worth it. We are a hard-working but criminally under-funded production company, and we are still figuring it out. I hope you'll keep an eye out for new stuff from us, and I still read all the fan mail and messages, though I'm not able to reply to most of them (there's a lot, and I have to work). They are much-appreciated and when I finally do the 3 & 6 FAQ vid I keep putting off, I'll get to answer some of those questions.

Thanks again everyone. More to come.

Wow, look at me. Bloggin'.

Some (few) have wondered what I'm up to, and what's coming up. I've been weathering a bit of a financial crisis (lightsabers only pay the bills for one man, and it ain't me) lately as I dig in and attempt to start a new company. I've spent the last month producing commercials for the cable industry, under the guise of Happy Baby Productions (Check out www.happybabyproductions.com). Happy Baby is now an official vendor for the National Cable Television Cooperative (NCTC), which has over 1100 members nationwide. If you are a cable customer with Avenue Broadband, New Wave Communications or Allegiance Communications, you'll be seeing ads produced by us over the coming weeks, and we're looking to hook up with many cable companies over the coming months. I've spent the last 4 weeks producing nearly 20 spots, ranging in subject from the upcoming 2009 digital switch to ads featuring different combinations of of digital phone, internet and cable TV bundles. If you check out the website, you'll see our first two completed ads, with FX work by a certain Emmy-winning effects artist.

It's an exciting time, albeit an extremely stressful one. We've had some exciting opportunities over the last few weeks and it takes a lot of attention and sheer work to live up to and take full advantage of them. But if all goes well, we'll have a company that can not only afford me a living but also fund new projects. I'm overflowing with ideas lately, but I have to stay calm and dig in on these ads, so I can have the financial and therefore creative freedom to do some great work in the back half of the year.

As I said we have many more ads coming up that will go on the official Happy Baby site, and I'll post when they're up so you guys and gals can see what we're up to.

Hope everyone is doing well. I've noticed a lot of activity on the 3 and 6 youtube pages, but I haven't been over to read posts lately. Nice to see people are still enjoying them. I have some much, much cooler stuff lined up. But its gonna take money, a whole lot of precious money to do it right. Wish us luck. Everyone take care, and if anyone here plays online MGS4 I've been sneaking in a little time to murder people, I play under the name MasterCocksman, if you feel like getting shot in the face.

Laters.

So, seriously folks, the future is here.


Absolutely incredible. Almost worth cutting my own arm off. I’d have a machine gun attachment and a back/nut scratching attachment.

So, this is fucking amazing.

..
via videosift.com

Looking forward to these-


via videosift.com

No freaking electricity?!?!?!?! Wow.

Here’s the only thing that would get me on a motorcycle-



NOt so futuristic, but here’s a guy having WAY too much fun, and I’m jealous.


via videosift.com

And finally, its high time for a muppets clip. But I’ll tell you, this is the most aggressive I’ve ever seen a muppet.


via videosift.com

’Till Next time. Watch out for those Metal Gears!

It can be a slow moving train around here, folks, anyony long-time reader will know what I’m talking about. But we’re FINALLY up on digg, and I encourage everyone here to go "digg it" by going here-

http://digg.com/comedy/Real_Lightsabers

The more diggs we get the more people see it. Sweet.

Shirts are slowly moving out the door. A complicated process falling right down in the middle of more production work then I’ve ever had. Like I hinted at last time, I’m working on a short documentary for Current TV on the resurgence in popularity of the $2 bill. Plus a 10 minute project for the City of Tyler, plus a handful of commercials for cable, plus the RYLA camp vid I did which I hope to have on youtube later in the week, I’m rather proud of it.

All this so I can outfit this crew with the equipment necessary to do some great film work later this year. Corey and I had a lovely chat about what’s in store for Fanboys, et al. Some exciting stuff.

I’m also gonna do a new video next week for to announce where you can get a hi-quality download of the movies now that Stage 6 is kaput. There will be a FAQ element to the video so if anyone has any questions other than "HOW CAN I MAKE THE SABERS LOOK REAL?!?!?!?!" then shoot it along to travis@fanboysproductions.com.

And now for the coolest thing I’ve seen all week.

SO, big doings over here. Two big new projects including a short documentary for cable. Very exciting. I’ll have details and fun stuff to show off in the coming weeks, but first!

MERCH!

After blowing all your money on whiskey and whores, I’ve decided to mail out the merch. The shirts turned out beautifully and the prints are colorful and lovingly autographed. The DVD screeners are freshly-burned and its all going out the door. Lotsa fun.

Like I said, some big projects underway over here, but what’s the next MOVIE project? Lots of ideas flying around, and these new gigs will help pay for the tools to make the really good stuff. New cameras, sound equipment, computers, its all happening.

So if you haven’t picked up a shirt to help the Really Big Cause, now is the time! You’ll get a free DVD copy of 3 and 6 with your order. Check out www.fanboysproductions.com for details and keep your an eye out cause there’s more to come!

And now, I give you:

Jerry the wiener dog.

Have to pass this along to anyone who hasn't seen it:



Solid Gold.

Proofing shirts today, update soon!

A million views. Not bad for a little movie like ours. I'd wax existential about the origins of 3, but I've told those stories a thousand times. So let's just celebrate.


Now let's see 2 million.

On a side note, this is the most amazing thing I've seen all week.



Hope everyone is doing fine. More to come.

Lots of work for me this week, lots underway. However, the merch train rolls along, albeit slowly, but we're almost there. The shirts are printing and should ship next week. I picked up the "mini-posters" today and let me tell you- I'm going to stop calling them that and go ahead and call them prints because they are quite large, and quite lovely. 11'' x 17'' is bigger than I thought. We'll be signing them over the weekend and they'll ship in their own tube, separate from the shirts.

However, big news: We're only producing 50 prints, instead of 100. The official site will update with that info soon but you heard it here first- 50 have been made and we've already sold 10 of them. After that, that's it.

Also, if you're in the USA and you ordered shirts. here's the haps- I'm including a DVD of 3 and 6 FREE with all shirt orders. They're just a DVD-R that I'll sign and include with the shirts. Sortof a sorry-they're-late-and-I've-got-to-make-a-bunch-to-send-to-contest-winners-anyway sorta thing. NOW, If you live outside the US, I'll email you and we'll see what we can do. Maybe you have an all-region DVD player.

So, that's the deal. More to come!

I would like to announce that tonight I got all 120 stars on Mario Galaxy, and unlocked Luigi. As soon as I heard he was playable I set out to crush that game AND I DID BABY. Absolutely one of the most satisfying gaming experiences I've ever had. Some breathtaking moments, especially the molten lava world, and some of the most original and satisfying boss fights I've ever played. Anyone who loves Mario games owes it to themselves to play this one through at least to 60 stars and fight Bowser, one of the best end battles ever and far and away better than the end fight in Mario 64.

I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so.

For years Mario 64 has been my favorite Mario game. I remember seeing a demo playing for the first time in Target and it absolutely blew me away, and I've gotten all 120 stars twice since it came out. But... no Luigi. Broke my heart. But, with the great boss fights and the revolutionary layout and physics engine, I think Mario Galaxy edges it out. However, here's a quick list of things I miss from Mario 64:

1: The spinning in Galaxy is wonderful, but a part of me does miss Mario's Solid Snake-like punch/kick combo, and the YA! WA! HOOOO!

2: How come when Mario falls asleep when you set the controller down, he doesn't dream of spaghetti and ravioli? In fact, Charles Martinet's whole performance in Galaxy is noticeably less... Italian in this one. When you beat Galaxy, Mario chimes in with "Thank you so much for playing my game!" instead of 64's "Thank you so much for to playin'-a my game!!!" Did the Italian anti-defamation league make Nintendo an offer they couldn't refuse? I wonder.

3: Koopa Shell Surfing. While I do indeed dig the underwater shell-riding, i miss zipping around levels surfing on a shell like a little red and blue badass.

However, one thing Galaxy really beats 64 on is the suits Mario wears. Bee Mario is wonderful, Ice Mario's ice-skating and graceful pirouettes are glorious,and the triumphant return of the Fire Flower is much appreciated. And, the free-flight hat is absolutely magnificent, and makes spending all that time in the Observatory a lot more fun in the back half of the game.

Toads popping up everywhere in the game is something that should never leave further Mario games, as is Bowser Jr. (I love how he puts on his little bib with gnarly teeth on it over his mouth to look as scary as his dad). The Toads voices are hysterical, and the bees are hilarious (I lost my shit when one bee told me "this slide is pretty much the most fun thing ever!"). And, last but not least, and unless I'm mistaken, this is the first score in a Mario game performed by a whole orchestra, and its fabulous. Just some beautiful, beautiful stuff.

But where to go from here? I mean, you've done the whole damned galaxy, what do they do in 6-8 years for the next game? Well since I'm sure everyone at Nintendo reads my blog, here's a suggestion guys- Super Mario Bros. 4. Let me play as Toad, Princess, Luigi and Mario from the start. You can set it in the "dream world" like Mario 2 but frankly I'd rather see a game that let's us travel the Mushroom Kingdom- The haunted house, the frost mountains, underground lava caverns, the castle, Bowser's stronghold, give Mario a GTA-esque overhaul.

Till then, I'll be running around as my man Luigi. Until Smash Bros. comes out in march. Any of you who are still reading this and haven't gone to gametrailers.com and looked at the gameplay video, you're really missing out. The opening cinema gives me chills a little bit, and seeing Samus and Pikachu tear ass down a spaceship hallway with ultimate purpose is true geek bliss. And the return of Pitt! Solid Snake!! Freaking Sonic the Hedgehog!!! Bring it on.

I was skeptical of this new age of Nintendo, even well after I bought a Wii. I was the only one who wasn't wild about Metroid Prime 3, and the new Zelda couldn't hold my interest. (I don't want to learn to fish and turn into a damned werewolf, guys, I wanna dungeon crawl and shoot Moblins and Octorocks and put bees into mason jars. Jeepers.) But Galaxy won me back, and Smash Bros. can't come soon enough. Easily in my top five games I've ever played. Let's see if I can't put a list together, in no particular order:

1. Tetris
2. Metal Gear Solid 3
3. Final Fantasy VII
4. Spider-man for the Genesis
5. Mario Galaxy

Pretty good list, I think. runners-up include Super Metroid, Rock Band (PS3), Mega Man 2, and Marvel Super Heroes (Capcom, PS1). Oh, and Silent Hill 2. And Resident Evil 1 & 2. And Shadow Of The Colossus. And TMNT (original arcade, NOT ANY Turtles game EVER released on the NES). Honorable mentions go to Mario Paint (PUT IT ON THE VIRTUAL CONSOLE) and Pokemon Snap (the only Pokemon game worth playing, IMO).

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Good times. Whats your top 5?

Anyone who's been around me over the last couple of weeks knows I've been going through a bit of a Mario phase lately. Been playing a lot of the original Super Mario Bros, a very relaxing game until you get to World 5 and then it becomes "Mario's Death Run", and they just make it as hard as humanly fucking possible.

I remember once I actually got the 99 life trick to work. Jumping on the shell by the stairs in World 5 I believe it was. I even had friends over. And my parents wanted to take me somewhere but I said "NO!! I have 99 lives on Mario Bros. and I AM NOT LEAVING."

And I STILL couldn't beat that game. 99 freaking lives. Over and over and over and over. You can imagine my friends' disappointment. I actually don't remember their reactions or even much of the experience of dying so many times. It's kind of like having been shot or being hit by a car, or what I assume that must be like- you just plain don't remember much of it afterwards. This marks my saddest Nintendo story, in front of the fact that I only ACTUALLY COMPLETED the Legend of Zelda in about winter 2002. In Kansas City, MO, in my Aunt's basement, on a TV older than I am.

Which leads me to the weirdest, craziest, most uncanny and wild video I've seen all day, besides this one:



Seems the Lawrence Welk staff heard the word "jesus" in the lyrics and ran with it. A modern spiritual, indeed. Makes me wanna watch Fear & Loathing.

Anyway, here's a video to go insane to. I really recommend watching the entire thing. I, personally, was transfixed.



"In this stupendous YouTube, Japanese hackers merge an old (pre-EyeToy) hand-recognition system with Super Mario Brothers, and screengrab several rounds of bonkers Mario, nudged along by a ghostly, giant hand."

God, I love youtube.

I'd like to say I think those are the best and worst versions of the mario theme song. The first one is a little bit wonderful, and a little bit KILL ME. And the second one is the laziest, saddest, most half-assed version of it I've ever heard. Also, I would play the shit out of this. A big handful of mario's- scoop em up and pitch em at the goombas. I'd be there all day.

I also need to share this, which I actually saw last night, 3 minutes of solid gold.



I mean, seriously, how much does that fucking rock?!?! I want to be as good at what I do as he is at that.

Now I have to find something to do with Mario 3 or I won't feel right.

One sec.







OK, sweet.



Wow, a $1.99 happy meal.

The only one of those toys I didn't have was the goomba. I had like three of those Luigi's. I was always a huge Luigi fan, but then I always root for the second banana. Big supporter of The Sidekick in whatever form he/she takes.

Anyway, I realize I'm writing these faster than you all can probly read them. I'll be taking the weekend off from the 'space to go to Austin to see THERE WILL BE MOTHERFUCKIN BLOOD. But I'll be checking around. It's a pleasure to be able to write something that people read, and thanks to everyone who's readin' and commentin' and sendin' me messages. I read all of them, even though I may not get back to every one. It's officially reached that point now that 6 has sunk in a bit where I get more mail then I can rightly answer. The only things I don't read are fans' ideas for 9. I'm really not interested, thanks all the same.

Tonight was good. The wheels are turning. I wrote dialogue for 9 on the back of an envelope tonight while eating pepperoni rolls. Couldn't find anything else. I got fired up because I finished No Country For Old Men (the novel) last night, and then I.......... acquired the movie, and I've watched it twice today. Anyone let down or frustrated by the ending, well, i won't call you a fool. I'll just tell you to look closer. And read the book.
*spoilers*
I've been thinking about it, and you can't really blame Moss- he'd seen combat, he's not afraid of some trouble. And Chigur wasn't even the one to finish him. But he ran afoul of the evil moving through the world, the very evil the sheriff can't fathom and can't stop. No one really can. And there is no hope in that story- evil will always walk the earth, and you'd just better stay clear. The book is beautiful- The sheriff is trying to know himself and know the world, and what he finds scares the living hell out of him. And you can see the fright on Tommy Lee's face. It's fucking gorgeous.

Bell's uncle breaks my heart in the book & the film. One line in particular- "All the time you spend tryin' to get back what's took from you, there's more goin' out the door. After a while you just try to get a tourniquet on it."

I may not have been shot and paralyzed, but I think I know exactly what he's talking about.

Movies, baby. Livin'.

Till next time, your moment of zen: