Well, believe it or not, some people actually do read my blogs, and many of you have requested that I begin writing more, so here it is, a blog from the legend himself.

Well, what a month September has been.  Crikey, not a crocy?  Although it is a shame that Steve Irwin died, believe me, I love his shows as much as anyone else waiting for a commercial on another channel to end, I am a little surprised at the "shock" of his death.  Did he not make a living handling the world's deadliest animals.  And when he "scaled it back", he was swimming in murky water with a 20 foot alligator.  Really, did he have any other end coming?  I would love to see the statistics of how long ago he should have died.  I think the real shame is that he leaves behind two kids, the oldest of which is only 8 who will probably never get to really know their dad, and the youngest of which will be smeared by the fact that his father held him in one hand and an uncooked chicken in another while trying to feed a gator.  That sucks.

Okay, so Penn State did not look good against Notre Dame (a team I despise).   The worst part is that there were soooooo many chances for them to be in the game in the first half and they blew it everytime.  But then again, they are pretty young, and we get to play Notre Dame at our place in exactly 363 days - that is slightly over 31.3 million seconds away, if you are scoring at home.

Maybe I am getting too old, but what the hell is up with the video Music Awards.  Granted, now that rap has taken over - music is pretty much out the window, but the show sucked.  And I don't just mean sucked as in it was bad.  I mean, mouth wide open, gulping Ron Jeremy type of sucking.  Really, is that the best they can do?  No wonder they have to buy everyone off with gift bags.  I really can only watch it for about one minute at a time, then I have to change it, cringing in embarassment for whoever is on stage.  Although I love these bands that try to make their look so unique that it is not even of this world anymore.  Just dress normally, if you are talented, it will stand on its own.

Well, that is enough venting for now, it is soon time to leave work, so I really do not feel like typing much anymore, I just want to go home and go to bed.

Just when you thought we were in tough times, take a look at this posting.  I am sure there are some skewed facts in there as even I will admit that it is a republican propoganda email, but still, some facts are facts.  Personally, I believe both JFK and Bill Clinton were probably our most overrated presidents of all time, but you can decide for yourself (that's why we live here, you have the freedom to think what you want.)

 

There were 39 combat related killings in Iraq in January.
In the fair city of Detroit there were 35 murders in the
month of January.That's just one American city,
about as deadly as the entire war-torn country of Iraq.



When some claim that President Bush shouldn't
have started this war, state the following:



a. FDR led us into World War II.

b. Germany never attacked us; Japan did.
>From 1941-1945, 450,000 lives were lost ...
an  average of 112,500 per year.



c. Truman finished that war and started one in Korea.
North Korea never attacked us.
>From 1950-1953, 55,000 lives were lost ...
an average of 18,334 per year.

d. John F. Kennedy started the Vietnam conflict in 1962.
Vietnam never attacked us.

e.   Johnson turned Vietnam into a quagmire.
>From 1965-1975, 58,000 lives were lost
an average of 5,800 per year.

f. Clinton went to war in Bosnia without UN or French  consent.
Bosnia never attacked us.
He was offered Osama bin Laden's head on a platter three
times by Sudan and did nothing. Osama has attacked us on
multiple occasions.

g. In the years since terrorists attacked us , President Bush
has liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled
al-Qaida, put nuclear inspectors in Libya, Iran, and North
Korea  without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist who
slaughtered 300,000 of his own people.



The Democrats are complaining
about how long the war is taking.
But  
It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno
to take the Branch Davidian compound.
That was a 51-day operation.



We've been looking for evidence for chemical weapons
in Iraq for less time than it took Hillary Clinton to find
the Rose Law Firm billing records.



It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the
Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard
than it took Ted Kennedy to call the police after his
Oldsmobile sank at Chappaquiddick



It took less time to take Iraq than it took
to count the votes in Florida!!!!

Our Commander-In-Chief is doing a  GREAT JOB!
The Military morale is high!

The biased media hopes we are too ignorant
to realize the facts



But Wait there's more!



JOHN GLENN (ON THE SENATE FLOOR)
Mon, 26 Jan 2004 11:13



Some people still don't understand why military personnel
do what they do for a living. This exchange between
Senators John Glenn and Senator Howard Metzenbaum
is worth reading. Not only is it a pretty impressive
impromptu speech, but it's also a good example of one
man's explanation of why men and women in the armed
services do what they do for a living



This IS a typical, though sad, example of what
some who have never served think of the military.



Senator Metzenbaum (speaking to Senator Glenn):
"How can you run for Senate
when you've never held a real job?"



Senator Glenn (D-Ohio):
"I served 23 years in the United States Marine Corps.
I served through two wars. I flew 149 missions.
My plane was hit by anti-aircraft fire on 12 different
occasions. I was in the space program.  It wasn't my
checkbook, Howard; it was my life on the line. It was
not a nine-to-five job, where I took time off to take the
daily cash receipts to the bank."



"I ask you to go with! me ... as I went the other day...
to a veteran's hospital and look those men ..
with their mangled bodies in the eye, and tell THEM
they didn't hold a job!



You go with me to the Space Program at NASA
and go, as I have gone, to the widows and Orphans
of Ed White, Gus Grissom and Roger Chaffee...
and you look those kids in the eye and tell them
that their DADS didn't hold a job.  


You go with me on Memorial Day and you stand in
Arlington National Cemetery, where I have more friends
buried than I'd like to remember, and you watch
those waving flags.



You stand there, and you think about this nation,
and you tell ME that those people didn't have a job?

What about you?"


For those who don't remember
During WWII, Howard Metzenbaum was an attorney
representing the Communist Party in the USA.

Now he's a Senator!



If you can read this, thank a teacher.
If you are reading it in English thank a Veteran.

 

It might not be a bad idea to keep this circulating.  

 

In God we Trust

What the fuck is going on?  I think I am definitely living in a bizarro world right now.  I don't even swear a lot, so that shows you I am thoroughly confused.  My raection to most things I see is a shake of the head and an "I don't get it."

If you are a blog subscriber of mine - I passed my stone last Wednesday and feel way much better now.  Thanks for your outpour of love.  Ha ha.

Oh well, I guess it's time for bed.  Another great day to look forward to tomorrow?

Ouch,

Another kidney stone, I cannot believe it.  I had one (actually two) early in January and this one hits me now, I cannot believe it.  I developed it last Monday which basically ruined the busiest week of the year for me.  Luckily, I was able to keep a date on Monday night, but had to cancel out of Billy Joel and the Flyers.  Why does it always seem to work like that?  There have been weeks (probably months) in my life when I had nothing big going on and could have easily accomodated something like this, but instead it has to be on the busiest fucking week of my year, great!

The worst part is that it is not moving either.  So, my options are to wait it out and keep taking pain killers (which make me sick beyond belief), or I can have them break it up inside of me.  Which I was informed would require the doctors to snake a camera up inside me (and you get one guess as to how that would go in!)  to find the stone, locate it and hit it with the "rays" that break it up.  Sounds like fun fun fun!

I drink tons of water every day and still I get one of these things, it just goes to show that life is unfair and just when you think you are getting the raw end, just remember, fairness is never guaranteed.  That is why you have to stick up for yourself and do not be afraid to take more than what is yours!

I realize that no one ever reads my blogs, we I appreciate on a level because it gives me a chance to spout - unedited by my conscious.

To all the recently divorced mother of toddlers - please, by all means, STOP HITTING ON ME!  I am not Insta-Dad.  You don't just add me and water, mix and have a family once again.  Instead of having a baby just for the sake of having a child, think things through, select someone you are compatible with and plan from there.  Aye aye aye!

Sorry for being slightly selfish here, but when I talk on the phone, I do not want to have to compete with someone screaming in the background.  It is annoying and not fair to me.  Never mind getting to see you every other weekend because that is when you don't have your child.

Believe me, I understand that having children is the biggest sacrifice anyone will ever have to make, but really, you cannot get pissed when I do not adapt to your routine right off the bat. 

I think that is enough.  Oh and by the way - Seahawks fans, my heart goes out to you - you were robbed, plain and simple.  You never had a chance to win yesterday and that is all it comes down to.  Steeler fans who do not repent this alleged Super Bowl victory shall be smote down and sentenced to an eternity of agony in Hell.

Okay, so 2006 has been completely odd for celebrity sightings.  Considering I live in West Chester, PA - which is a suburb of Philadelphia, probably half an hour from the city.

I have seen two quasi-"celebrities" so far this calendar year.

A few weeks ago, I saw Phil Margera (father of Bam Margera (Viva La Bam!) and contestant on Celebrity Fit Club 2).  He still looked a little overweight, and it was weird because I recognized him, but I could not figure out from where.  Bizarre.

Today, our office group was eating at the same Italian place we eat at every Friday and sitting at the table aside of us was the placekicker for the 1972 Miami Dolphins - Garo Yepremian.  Garo is probably best known for attempting a pass from a botched field goal attempt.  His pass was intercepted and run back for the Redskins only score in the Super Bowl which capped off the Dolphins perfect season.  Very very bizarre.

So my guess is who's next?  My personal inside hope is for the girl who played "Jerry", Blair's cousin who was inflicted with Cerebral Palsy and let young Americans everywhere know that CP was only a physical handciap, and the only part of it that hurt was when people would make fun.

Just wanted to say that I went to see the U2 concert on Sunday night.  It was incredible.  I can definitely scratch that off the list of things I wanted to do before I die (not that I plan on kicking it anytime soon, just one of those things - you gotta set goals people).  Next, can anyone get me Jessica Simpson's home phone?  (Ha just kidding!)

U2 put on a super show, the lights, images, sound, everything was top notch, I would have gone Monday night too, but that show sold out in twenty minutes as well, and going to see someone two nights in a row is a sin, you are taking the seat of someone else who might not ever get the chance to see them.

I admire Bono and U2 for using their forum in a positive way.  Especially when you put them aside of greedy athletes like Terrell Owens who just use media attention to complain about not getting money.  U2 uses media attention to help make the world a better place, and there isn't anything wrong with that.

Alright, off the soap box with me.  I was glad to see the show, it got my mind off of the brutal loss suffered by my alma mater, Penn State.  Heartbreaker guys, heartbraeker.

Okay, so here it is.  Now I like to watch football as much as any White Male aged 18-45 who spends a lot of money, but I think we have gone well beyond the saturation point of what one person could possibly be expected to bear.  College football has games on Thursday night and Friday night.  Then on Saturday, there are no less than 12 college games on the various stations featured with tripleheaders (tripleheaders of ANYTHING are one header too much).  Then on Sunday, there is a two-hour pre-game show, then one o'clock games, and four o'clock games, and the Sunday Night Game.  Of course, do not forget about Monday night Football.  Now I know what you are saying, why would someone sit in front of the TV for all of that - well I don't, it's just that because the networks feel the need to nationally broadcast everything, there is waaaay too much crap that passes as "intriguing matchups".  Yesterday, the featured game here in Philly was the Redskins-Bears which ended in a 9-7 Washington win.  Now, this may be a calculated move to get everyone to buy NFL Sunday Ticket, but I for one am not biting.

Those are my thoughts, and I am sticking to them.

Friday is my birthday.  So to all my fans who want to get me gifts, trips, etc.  Please, we are asking that you just send the cash in the amount of the gift you planned on getting, and I will make sure it goes to the right recipient.

If you can guess my age without looking at my profile, congratulations - cheater!!  No one ever guesses my age correctly.

And to my neighbor whose bitchy girlfriend continues to park in my spot despite the fact that they already take up two spots.  Don't walk your dog in the grass anymore, I may or may not have spilled some rat posion over there, and I may or may not be sure if I cleaned it up very well  .  You spineless piece of feces, I swear I would pay money out of my own pocket to meet you in the Octagon.  Ha!

I promise I am not a psycho, just stay on my good side .

So my home city just hosted LIVE 8 and did a nice job doing it turning out nearly a million strong.  For the most ass backwards city in America, I would have to say they pulled it off rather well.

As for MTV/VH-1, I have one thing to say.  Shut the Fuck up, and let me listen and see the performers.  I do not need some post-pubescent snot nose telling me about the world's problems.  I can read, I know how backwards Africa is.  You only have to tell me once.  I swear when they cut into Pink Floyd to tell us for the 500th time that there is a lot of AIDS in Africa, I actually started cheering the fact.  Here it is: I have sex with women, I do not have AIDS - what a fucking miracle right?  No.  Either wear a condom or stay home and jack off, I really don't care.  Only dopes have AIDS.  I think we should basically ship every rubber made for the rest of the calendar year there.  That would cut down on the AIDS, and the number of mouths to feed.  Alright, next world problem please - I think I can solve them all.