i met a girl last week. a wonderful girl. its now one week since we met and i am very strangely taken witht his one i stopped looking at other girls entirely like a few days ago. shes super pretty and sweet. and just the coolest girl i have ever met. i am seeing her more and more and i am having some trouble trying to figure out how to really share how i feel about her. i dont wanna freak her out cause i am kinda freaked out too but in a good way. so anyone with more competancy in these matters, pretty please with sugar and a cherry on top help me.

i am now 21. many people thought that i would never live long enough to see this day. tohers thought i would die this day. well it is now the day after, and i am still here. it was pretty rough but has only provided more backing to the theory of me dying by means of bear attack at age fifty.

my gaming binge is finally over.  with thirty hours of gameplay plus more than a few hours of fmv  mgs 3 has proven to be highly worthwhile these past two days.  powered by four pizzas some sodas (many sodas)  i have made it in one piece.  i highly recommend the experience.the end of the game is particularly awesomelast three hours or so.

kannagisai1: now is the time time for the rhyme these lyrics i be blastin aint just trends a passin these crowds amassin are here to see what it is to be on a audible oddyssey that all people oughta see not one not two but three times to know to know fo sure and all these places that we will go youll never skip this insane show insane is the pain that sends yer mind right down the drain when ya knew not to ride train but did it anyhow and now yer not sane but who is to blame when yer not the same noone but yerself brings yer name to shame so on the shelf up goes yer game ya just too lame. so never lose sight of whatcha choose might just give the illest of skills just like the mind killa thrilla bone chilla skills so ill ya say godzilla was here but here i stand with what an open hand so come along now is the time by me i made this my rhyme

tired but not so tired. its one of those nights. one of those nights where that fammiliar fear of the unknown is all to real. i know i am not going to sleep good tonight. there is too much on my mind. its been a while since i slept normal. like so long i cant remember two consecutive days. what to do what to do. i found a cool website with videos of some funny shit (see below). but i watched it all. for serious all that shit about school and real life and growing up. it all kinda blows. we need to relax, but we need time to relax, time is money, money doesnt make time it takes time, so what are we supposed to do. work of course thats it. and for the other time. get a worthwhile hobby. or be like everyone else and watch tv (gag fucking gag). so what do we do, what do we do. its why people dont like being alone, why they go to bars when they are old enough. two birds with one stone. drink to forget and to have recess with others that are also pretending their not alone. but i do it too. so i guess that makes me a douche. when i wake up, i am not going to be a douche any more. (thankyou jeff for the proper spelling of douche) im gonna do one thing and only thing out of the ordinary, i am gonna take on a student in life a padowan as it were. i am going to teach her to set others free from fear, some fear anyway. she will be the beginning. she will save the world.

so today my boy pavel says bored ya should write something creative and i told i was more in the mood to go blow shit up or shoot something.  well i did that, and having done it, i am still bored.  ya like the punctuation matt? ya fuck. jk.

but anywho here goes.  this guy he goes for a walk, gotta clear his head.  the walk goes on for a few hours, hes that flustered.  then outta nowhere a dog starts barking across the street.  a car alarm goes off a block away.  the strret light twenty feet away blows out without explanation.  why, why is all this shit happening, he thinks to himself.  then the cops pull onto the street, sirens wailing lights blaring.  run he thinks and run he does. why? why not? he runs until he cant hear the sirens anymore. until his heart pounds like a hammer on the inside of his chest, till his veins run with acid.  then he runs some more.  after who knows how long hes tired and its dark, barely light enough to see.  hes in a park now, deep within, far from the familiar glow of his thick urban home.  so tired now.  its gotta be safe, he thinks.  so a rest will do, just a nap.  a flash of light.  awake but where, sharp noises pierce his skull and eyes.  a bright artificial light fights with him to keep his eyelids shut.  the blur begins to fade as does the sharpness of the sound and it all starts to make sense.  " you were lucky that girl who brought you in wasnt some asshole, otherwise you woulda just got shit on.  hehehe."  says the deep southern bell voice of god knows who behind him.  " a jogger found you in the park, thought ya were jumped."  the voice now has a face.  long tied back red hair set atop a perfectly proportioned face with full red lips, too bad shes a little too big to pull it off otherwise shed be good to go.  he tries to move.  its as if he made of glass and all he does is break."take it easy, take it easy you coulda died.  when you were found you couldnt be awakened, your blood sugar was so low you went into shock, much longer and you woulda died.  what were ya doin anyway?"  hands on her hips and curious look with a tilt on her face damanded explanation that didn't exist. all he had to say was "there was a dog and.... to be continued.

well fuckin a so ends another day.  another one clicks by to the eternal tune of aimless potential.  superboredom has definately taken good hold.  its like some sort of shadow dwelling creature whos embrace merely acts to sap motivation from the deepest pit of my being.  but its ok it gives me time to think, something i need to do.  theres so much to be done.  mostly been kinda thinkin about texas alot, my buddies there.  its strange,  not like any of them were particularly good friends  or like i had sooo fuckin many to begin with.  ya just miss what ya knew,  same goes for everything i suppose.  i mean it was kinda like being in gradeschool again back there.  ya knew what you were doin the next day, you were getting ass raped air force style, but ya knew it was coming.  i mean i know whats coming now,  but like i can change it and i will but to what,  some big fuckin choices everyday shit.  now dont get me wrong, its way better than ass raping.  i think i just need some respectable advice,  i think its called guidance, to ease the whole where to next factor.  heheh any input on that would be SUPER!!

the next thing is well i been thinkin uncontrollably about makin a change like its a little thing in side of me that aint so little anymore.  its that conscience thing i guess.  that inner urge to do right by the world.  its real strong like in a really idealistic way.  as in revolution.  like fuck the election fuck all that shit just be good, just do right, help someone and theyll help someone else. shit help alotta people.  just with everyday shit.  itll perpetuate itself, change the whole world.  if it worked.  if it worked noo one care about issues cause there would be none and no one would make drama cause theyd for once be busy thinkin about how to help.  then when they went to bed theyd sleep well because instead of the few people who do in the world right now, everyone,  would dream.  the world would grow again.  cause right now we go forward, at a lurch, but forward.  but if everyone dreamed, holy fuckin shit. who knows, id stake my life on the world being a better place for it though. 

 

so now the big question,

where to start?

what to say?

what to do?

to make everyone say,  why not.

yeah just chillin here. waitin for my homeboy hollowdarkness to get off work so we can hang. got off work. where i love working. straight up teaching little kids is the best stuff ever. their all so fun, and its reassuring to think that hey maybe because of something i taught them they are nto gonna grow up to be a dueschebag. cause, hehe, we know theres way too many as it is. still movin in gonna try and get the bed in the basement and maybe some posters maybe get the armory started up. and hopefully get some pics up on this biatch new computer need pic upload eerrrrrggghhhh!!! make the penguin stop pecking my damn brain with menial shit. aight well im out peeps cyaas later. p.s. donatello is the best hero in half shell

yoyoyo hows it goin internet this my first day on this shiznit so yeah peeps treat me nice and we can talk and be homies and all that crap aight

 

jk im really pretty normal some of my profile is just to be goofy or is an inside joke but yeah write me please i like havin penpals on this stuff