2+ pounds of any good meat, I prefer chicken, turkey, or sometimes shrimp
3 cans Bush's Black Beans, drained (throw the liquid out)
2 big cans Hunt's Crushed Tomatoes
1 medium can tomato paste
2 packages sliced mushrooms
Red, Yellow and Green Bell Peppers, chopped
1 package Collards or Turnip Greens (I can never fit the whole thing in the pot) You can substitute 2 big bunches of parsley if the collards don't look good, or if you want a change of pace.
Lots of garlic
As many onions as will fit in the pan
Sliced Water Chestnuts
Sliced Bamboo Shoots
Other goodies, as you see fit
1/4 cup cooking oil, or more
Spices, especially cumin

Brown the meat in the oil, then put all the rest into the pot until you run out of room. Don't drain the tomatoes! Bring it to a boil and then say a Prayer that lasts at least 5 minutes. Don't forget to stir the whole time!
Serve yourself a modest sized bowl, and determine whether to add more onions or more collards, more peppers, spices. The bowl you just took gives you room to add what's needed.

You can tell, this recipe has wiggle-room! It's delicious over a bed of yellow or white rice, or if you make it thick by adding extra tomato paste or cooking it down awhile it can be the filling for HazMat Burritos, or you can just have it with tortilla chips!

Commercials tell you what you "neeeeeeed", and what you "deserrrrrrrrve", and that if you just sign the dotted line they'll set you up with all those things, and you'll be happy and fulfilled.
Since I can remember, and if what I've been told is true, since literally minutes after I was born, I've been told I'm "different". People have been more and less charitable in how they say it, but the message has consistently been that I'm "different". In Japan I wasn't just "gaijin", I was "hen-na gaijin", the strange foreigner. My Japanese friends and I always laugh about it, and I always take it in good fun. One time I was just jawing with the folks in a local bar, and one guy said "honma jya, henna gaijin jya naa", Okayama dialect for "it's true, you are a strange foreigner", and I was just a wee bit into my cups, so I replied, "seh deh anta goku futsuu na Nihonjin-san na no ka naa?", Okayama dialect for "So you're just an average, run-of-the-mill Honorable Japanese person?" Everybody laughed, they liked that I used the honorific "san" so I wasn't just putting the guy down, but at the same time I invited him to take a good look at just what "normal" is.
That's why I'm writing to you today, Dear Readers. "Normal" is now dictated by commercials that tell you how skinny you should be, how outrageous you should be, how this you should be, how that you should be, and of course the one and only way you could possibly attain that greatness is by buying whatever-the-heck they're selling.
And check out some car commercials: they're gonna give you 5-THOUSAND DOLLARS for some heap of rust you're barely able to shove onto their lot, then they'll just-plain GIVE you a brand-new car at 0% interest. Draw your own conclusions, but don't blame me for calling people who believe that stuff STUPID.
Something else: those commercials work. That means STUPID=NORMAL.
Now do you understand when I'm happy that people tell me I'm "different"?
All my Love,
John

A Flat-screen and a teevo.
X-box.
I-pod.
A Talking Tickle-me-elmo.

Reality-TV.
Does this flat-screen make me look fat??
Reality-fucking-TV.
There, did I say something you could relate to?

I've been working on it.

Insert emoticon.
Nothing better to do.
Relationships? Protest vote.
NOTA? Knew her well back in '82.

I know, I'll play the Lotto.
O God, if You really Love me, let me win really big!
So I can buy a double-wide flat-screen.

Not funny.

Funny, I was thinking,
What if we're just a bunch of super-mini-cam's
Running around,
Recording all we see, say, and do,

Then

Judgment Day is God giving out
Oscars or Emmies or Razzies

Do ya think you'll get a Prize?
Think God will say,
"Oh yeah, I want to see that flaccid, sexy bod,
Sitting there watching Reality TV"?

Oh, it's not your fault.
Not your fault, no-fault.
No-fault insurance, No-fault loans,
No-fault divorce, No-fault Reality TV.

On a flat-screen.

That you bought on credit.
0% interest.

(Offer not valid in some states.)

How many of you ask, "What can I do about it?"
It's OK, God put us here so we could learn and teach. A better palce? You want to make the world a better place? Lots of heavy lifting to do. Lots of looking in the mirror when we point the finger. Yes you, yes I.
That pastor did the naughty and bought ka-ka from a ho-mo. This mama's on welfare. Brother over there killed a man for no better reason than personal pride. We all called this charlatan "leader". That fella nearly died of his own stupidity.
"What can I do about it?"
News-flash for all you conservatives out there: It's not just the liberals' fault. News-flash for liberals: fill in the blank.
"What can I do about it?"
Well, hearken unto yaw computah screen, Chillun O' God, 'cause I have just short of 44 years of experience informing my answer to that very pertinent question:
Everything you can!
Not "get rich", certainly not "get rich quick", that's not even correct English. Getting rich ain't misbehaving, but there's more to it than just amASSing piles of green pieces of paper.
Thing 1 is to take care of your family. If that means you have to work for "the man" for a while, "man-up" and work for the man, but don't waste a second watching the damned Idiot Box, LEARN. Educate yo' se'f!!!
Let me tell you one thing, wealth can be stolen. Bank accounts and stocks and bonds and such things can be defrauded. You want something that's immune, let me say that louder so you can hear it properly- IMMUNE- to theft? Knowledge. Education. "Book-learnin'". Don't believe those who tell you that studying is "too white". (Whoops, did I just step on some racists' tails?) I said knowledge is IMMUNE TO THEFT. For example: I speak Japanese. I read and (though my penmanship is poor) write Japanese. I could, with a few days' notice, make tens of thousands of dollars per year with just that knowledge. Thug could kronk me on the head and take my wallet (couldn't take my watch 'cause I don't have one, it's always TIME), he could even render me incapable of speech, but he could never transfer the fruit of my labor, my study, to his own head. If he wants to speak Japanese, or Farsi, or Swahili, or Spanish (which I also speak but it's a very distant third language), he'll just have to spend some time STUDYING. Acting White. I don't care if it's acting Purple-Polka-Dot-Paisley with a green slash across the middle. Knowledge is insusceptible to theft. It's hard even to give: Think on it: I could really like you, and I could wish you could speak Japanese, and at the same time you could wish you could speak Japanese. You know how much that would amount to? It's what Neal Boortz calls "Firing the Surgeon General"! Squizzle! Nothing more, until you learn and I teach, or somebody else learns and teaches.
So, will you turn off the Idiot Box? Will you sweat? Will you study?
Maybe 1 in 10,000 will. Maybe 1 in 10,000 will dance, sing, sculpt, write, study, BE.