I introduced myself and the rest is history. Gotta make a move or you'll miss out. and here's to living in the moment.

Introduction : Okay, so after a few attempts at trying the video blog, Ive decided Im just going to do what I do best and write about this past September 30th: the best day of my life and a life-defining moment for me. From the day I arrived to my college campus in Fall 2005, I dont know how many times I had to pass by my school's Greek Theater on the way to class or starred out the third floor window of my World Politics class that had the view of the theater and had wished and imagined Jimmy Eat World's presence on that out door stage. When I found out about September 30th my heart had raced like it had never raced in my 20 years. I had found myself more privileged than ever before. Two years of picturing it in my head, seven years of excuse after excuse for why I could never go to their shows; I am now a junior in college, and I was finally going to get my wish.

Let me make a few things clear: I hate the word fan, I hate the phrase "favorite band" they are just too generic especially when talking about  them. You know how people have a soul mate, that one being who just gets them in anything and everything, well I'd like to think about Jimmy Eat World as a uhhh "soul" band (thats as close as im going to get to trying to explain them)...they just get me and move me, and the amount of time Ive loved them does not matter; too long to count anyway. Okay well thats as much as Im going to say about my passion for them, because everything else only I will understand and appreciate.

They played at my school this past September 30th. I knew beforehand this day was going to be incredible and special. A suupper early 21st birthday, a supper early christmas present for me; this day I knew was going to be unforgettable. It really felt they were here to perform especially for me. The night before the festival some of my friends, both RA's, and I went to Jack in the Box and they had the 411 on "what was going down" for Fall Fest and they made the big mistake of telling me at what time they were going to arrive. dont worry I didnt do anything, and if i could've, I would've. I would've loved to have had greet them at the break of dawn when they arrived and to have welcomed them and made them feel at home. I dont feel shame in saying that no one would've deserved that privilege more than me, when it comes to them of course. Deal is I was soo unsteady that night I ended up going to sleep close to 4 a.m. wishing I was the one who needed to get up in two hours to go greet them. all i really wanted to say was thank you for being here.

Morning arrives and I wake up to hear the bands warm up  in the Greek Theater, this was about 8 am; I let the fact that they were actually here hit me and I just got a rush of "why am i still in my room I need to go say hi" and jumped out of bed. Ha! dont worry I didnt do anything, deal is, I woke up faster than you can say "Its time to go to class", it was Sunday though, so thank god! 

So how big was this day for this me? even what I wore that day had to be something special, something that would just make me stand out from the rest of the crowd. I had bought a sundress during the summer that just was the most earthy soft dress I had ever seen. It was going to be mine. Anyway, this dress just made me feel beautiful and soft when I tried it on. Decision on what to wear on this day was not hard at all. The day of the festival I had felt so incredibly great, I admit I had a different light, a glow, in myself.

The Dress (not day of show)


The Redlands Show: Opening bands play and Im enjoying the moment and Im am getting pumped. Oh and by the way, I did have front row 0:). I stood Standing there for a good 4 hourse before they came on. When it came their turn to play and they walked on stage I had to pinch myself and all I remember is my hand on my chest trying to hold my heart from popping out. That, and I had the weirdest giggle. When they played 23 it really hit me that I was seeing them and I admit, I did get teary eyed. They moved me just like they always have and just like I had expected them to. so they played for a good hour and fifteen minutes. When they walked off stage my heart dropped. So the show was over and I couldnt walk away. I physically couldnt, something kept me there. they came to my second home, I needed to thank them for that. I knew this couldnt have been it, my gut just kept telling me that. it was funny because my friends were waiting for me to walk out with them and then the security people started making coversation with me, so I just told my friends "dont worry Ill head out after you guys" and they left. even my friend greg left who was peeing just like I was about Jimmy, only, of course, a little less than me haha. well minutes were ticking and people were leaving,  the longer I was there. so eventually I start making peace with myself and begin to walk out. As I kept walking out, i kept looking back, trying to let it sink in, wanting to remember every detail of that show.

When I exited, there was a volunteer booth for students who wanted to help with clean up. My friend veronica was there to help and I go up to say hi to her and we start making conversation, so the longer I stayed talking to her the more tempted I was to stay and "help" with clean up. So I do. I ended up in the backstage area a few times but I got nothing. So when that was over, I walk back to my dorm with Veronica and Shella. They witnessed  me going back into my room, close the door, i think we even said good night. I walk in my room, I take my shoes off, tell my roommate how amazing the show was and how much fun I had especially when Tom waved back at me during the show, and I tried relaxing...ha, yea right. In  a matter of good 15 minutes something pushed me and I start putting my shoes back on, grab my sweater and wallet, and camera and walk out the door, out of the dorm and back to the Greek Theater. That must have been one of the longest walks I have ever taken. I sneak through the back of  the administration building that lead to Greek Theater and I knew no one would be able to see me there. so I proceed and observe that the security people had left, no one was really checking for anyone anymore. So I keep creeping up until I get to the top steps of the theater and I just sit on the steps and observe people taking down the stage. pretty sad but definitely more memorable than sad. im sitting there and I could tell there was this 'One man" looking towards my direction, or at least I think he was and Im like "damn it! someone is going to throw me out", afterwards I notice students who were there helping with the show taking pictures with this 'one man' and then three other guys walk up to the group of students. I knew it was them. How unfair to have been witnessing this, but yet happy for those kids. so I push myself to the lower steps of the theater and I keep going lower and lower til im in the front: ok, now Im visible to everyone and I could see who this one man was. It was Jim and he was the only one left still talking to the kids. Two girls walk out of there and head over to my direction, as in leaving the venue and I ask them to get me in there that I really needed to meet them. They were so relaxed, they just tell me "Oh, dont worry they're not checking anymore just go in." I didnt want to walk in there though without one of those working staff badges and risk getting kicked out and humiliated in front of him but I suck it up and just start walking: "now or never, now or never, now or never".I walk in and beg to God (silently) that i dont get thrown out.  luckily the girl in charge of my dorm was one of the main directors. I whisper to her to not throw me out and she reasurres me and lets me stay and says: there he is. So I go, look at him in the eye, shake his hand, introduce myself and tell him what an amazing show they put on. I was there for a good 10 minutes with the rest of the kids just talking to him. I really dont remember what was said though or what I asked him, i know i asked him something else, but have no clue what it was. I do, however, remember being teased about what I had done though, and thats ok, because we laughed and he laughed and it was such a relaxed atmosphere. But thats why its been pretty hard to write about this and has taken me forever, because it seemed like a dream, like a blurr, trying to just keep to myself what I remembered most; that if i talked or wrote about it right away, the more id forget. it took a while for it to sink in. I dont even know how I got to sleep that night, the smile was glued to my face. Needless to say, its taken me almost three weeks.

When I went back to the Greek Theater...Glow? Yes, No?...Pretty Real. What a sweet guy he is in person.

Best part, is that it doesnt end there.

The Wiltern Show October 16th: Before the Redlands show, I was predicting seeing Jimmy at Fall Fest was going to be a huge tease, that I was going to be left with seeing more. so I decide to try and look for tickets for another of their shows here in southern california.The Wiltern was my perfect target. I had seen them on my college campus, my second home, how better than to watch them in my hometown.They played October 16th, this past Tuesday, their release day album too btw ;), (which you NEED to go get!). So I found tickets to the show (how I found tickets is a whole other story, in one word: craigslist...eeekkk!!! this was the only exception though). I was headed to the Wiltern! My brother graciously joined me. The tickets were 'down' so once again I had conquered the front stage...ok, ok like two or three people were in front of me. The show was amazing. More importantly I am glad I was there to support them on their big day. Incredible night. They played "For me this is Heaven" (which you can hear on my playlist, i suggest you do) and I teared up yet again. I fell in love with their new song "always be" and "firefight". After the show my brother patiently waited with me at the back of the Wiltern for a chance to meet all four guys this time. We were out of luck though. It was cold and he had to go to work in the morning, on our way to the car, im passing by these other people who were also at the show in redlands and I heard this girl say "hey that girl was at the redlands show. remember? the one with the sundress on" Bamn! I made myself stand out, made someone remember me! thats part of what I wanted and that made me feel good. I said hi to them and wished them luck on seeing the band. I head home and Im sad but at the same time, I still had that memory of meeting Jim and that kept me happy.

I arrive home and Im feeling like it was not over, just like I did when I arrived to my room back at redlands. So I remember the fact that they were having a signing the day after. But how to stay? I needed to go to class. So I have a huge dilemma and ask for opinions. Everyone who was aware of my deep fond for them, rooted for me to stay. I knew i was going to feel guilty as hell, but hey its what you pay for. and it had to be worth it right? I inform my mom and she wasnt too happy about it but I insisted on how they werent the typical artist band. that they mean something wayy more to me. I end up convincing both of my parents.

The day of the signing, I was pretty nervous. I knew he wasnt going to remember me and that was going to be bum me out some, I mean why would he? I cant even remember a student I met on campus the day after, why would he remember me?  So I arrive and it starts hitting me that I am going to meet the guys together. How amazing. I get to the front of the line and I help take the picture of Krissy and Dane, couple I met the day of, and now its my turn. I walk up and I make eye contact with the band and then Jim, smile and say "Hey guys, how are you?" and then Jim "Hey you were at the show in Redlands! *big smiles from him*". Yeah, I felt my eyes get small and my cheeks warm up, and I had a huge smile from left to right: "Yes I am!" and I highfived him and thanked him for remembering me; remembering my face after all of the faces he's seen. I never thought I was worth remembering and he proved me wrong, out of all people. I mean who knows, maybe he just has a good photographic memory, he's good with faces. But after the number of shows he was in after Redlands, remembering me was the last thing I expected. Anyway if it is that he just has a photographic memory, Id still like think there was something worth remembering about me. I felt so special. I still feel special. I'd like to think that because of it he will always remember my school, the show, the day I was courageous enough to come back just to shake his/their hand, that he'll remember this community and I hope he liked us, by the way he posted a picture of us kids that stayed chatting with him on his band blog dated 9/30, pretty kool feeling when I saw that, I must say..."remember that one girl that highfived me?" hehe.
October 17th

The Best part of going back to the Greek Theater that one night, was seeing how down to earth Jim was, how simple he was, how human he was, how real and friendly he was and I know he speaks for the other guys as well, just as they would speak for him. Knowing that fact made it all just more worth while. Seeing Jim smile and laugh made my night, even if it meant that it was at my expense. I was so privileged being there in that moment--I would do it all over again. You know how some bands have that power of speaking to you through their music and lyrics that it can detail almost every aspect of your life, making you feel like that they have known you forever as you have them? Well when you get the chance of meeting them, even its just one of them in person, it still feels like they have known you forever and you have known them forever, only seeing them in person and embracing their presence (even if its just for 10 minutes) was just delayed a bit and that was the case for me. My defining moment: courage, determination and drive combined together will get you to do things you would never thought you'd ever have the guts to do.

My Lastest Message to the Band:
Oct 17, 2007 9:02 PM
These past two days have been amazing. Thank you for the show yesterday night, I consider myself lucky to have been part of it and thank you for giving me an opportunity to say hello to all four of you this evening. Thank you jim, for remembering me and where from too, it really meant a lot and a lot is an understatement. Keep my school close to you guys and when you leave california and you happen to pass by Redlands, just know that you have left a huge imprint on that campus and when I need to find serenity that stage will always be there for me to go to. Im glad I finally got to meet you boys together. going back to Redlands tomorrow morning is going to be bittersweet. stay amazing. stay cool. and I'll see you when I see you :)

Blessings and Be Proud with what you have Accompished,
Yvette

University of Redlands, Greek Theater


The Wiltern, 10/16


University of Redlands, 09/30

(for the archives...old bulletin)
Date: Sep 12, 2007 10:57 *Updated today*PM

I woke up this morning not having any idea that by the end of the day i would have a ticket to a Jimmy Eat World show. I am so excited that excited is an understatment. I still cant believe it...those guys speak (sing) a lot of emotions i can't put into words myself so i do hold them close and admire them big time, they are MY band. My school year has not even fully began and they have already made it MY year. How did my school ever know? This year has been set to be a tough one but having them here, it just reminds me that anything is possible and it just makes me feel more determined to kick ass this year. man i was extremely excited earlier, i left a comment on their page and sounded like a valley girl, im soo embarrased, but im more calm now. To the Guyss: I dont know what to say. Im speechless everytime i think of you being here, it feels so surreal it was just meant to be. ever since i got my ticket today, every chance i get, i go to my favorite vids on my youtube and just watch them trying to believe that i am going to be in the audience in two weeks! i thought i would just share a few of the vids i cant stop watching...my fav would have to be well, ALL of them, but check out the second one or the fourth one, if you like me, check them ALL out lol.

[Original Post Date: June 23, 2008]

I Breathe, Eat, Sleep, Live on these songs.
If my Life had a soundtrack it would look something like this...
If you find yourself in love with this list
you could be in love with me without knowing it 0:).
These songs could say little to you about me, but yet say a ton.

1: For Me this Is Heaven by Jimmy Eat World:

I first heard this song back in the seventh grade. This song was the reason why I fell in Love with Jimmy Eat World. This song is magic.

The first star I see may not be a star/You can't do a thing but wait/So let's wait for one more.../And the time's such clumsy time/In deciding if it's time/I'm careful but not sure how it goes/You can loose yourself in your courage/When the time we have now ends/When the big hand goes round again.../Can you still feel the butterflies?/Can you still hear the last goodnight?/And the mindless comfort grows/When I'm alone with my 'great' plans/And this is what you said gets her through it/If I don't let myself be happy now then when?/If not now when/The time we have now ends/And when the big hand goes round again.../Can you still feel the butterflies?/Can you still hear the last goodnight?/I close my eyes and believe/Wherever you are /An Angel/For when the time we have now ends/And when the big hand goes round again/Can you still feel the butterflies?/Can you still hear the last goodnight?

1: Closer, Jimmy Eat World:

To Make Love Count...To make what could have been, be. relationships that never really get a chance to grow are sometimes the strongest ones.

Everyday I get a little closer, dear/Will you love me darling when I get there?/I'll need sunshine, I'll need rest/Pour us whiskey, water-kissed/Remember me,/she said, smiling/Write my name somewhere safe/Touch and taste Fades with space/I'll never be who you'll dream/Everyday I try a little harder, dear/But those things you do.../I don't wanna hear/You'll have yours, I'll have mine/No one guilty/no one right/Remember me,/she said, smiling/Write my name somewhere safe/Touch and taste Fades with space/I'll never be who you'll dream/Everyday I get a little closer, dear/Going to drive fast/all night till I get there/Not much time we can waste/Nothing pretty left to say

1: 41 by Dave Matthews Band:

When you see love creeping to you slowly but speeding all at the same time...that rush. I can listen to this song a hundred times in a row and not get tired of it...go to my main page and listen to it, its on my ILike list. It wont disappoint...promise.

Come see/I swear by now I'm playing time against my troubles oh/I'm coming slow but speeding.../Do you wish for a dance and while I'm in the front/My play on time is won/Oh, but the difficulty is coming here.../I will go in this way/Oh, and I'll find my own way out/I won't tell you what to be/Oh,no, but I'm coming to much more/Me/All at once the ghosts come back/Reeling in you now oh tell me/What if they came down crushing/It used to be/that you and me/play for all of the loneliness/that nobody notices now/I'm begging slow 'cause I'm coming here.../I'm only waiting/I wanted to stay/I wanted to play/I wanted to love you/I'm only this far/And only tomorrow leads the way/I'm coming waltzing back/and moving into your head/Please, I wouldn't pass this by/Oh no, but I wouldn't take more than I need/What sort of man goes by?/Well, I will bring water/Why won't you ever be glad?/It melts into wonder/I came in praying for you/Why won't you run in to rain and pray?/Let all tears splash all over you/The way the rain comes,/The way the rain comes down on you...

1: Your House by Jimmy Eat World

To have someone walk away and not let them know how you feel should be a crime, especially since the one doing the walking is only begging to be stopped just to let you know the mutual feeling.

When you're on/I swear you're on/You rip my heart right out/You rip my heart right out/I think the whole room/Can hear me/Clear my throat/You rip my heart right out/You rip my heart right out/If you still care at all/Don't go, tell me now/If you love me at all/Don't call/Then out of nowhere/Put me right back there/Rip my heart out/You rip my heart right out/And we know/What happens when/We get to your house/Rip my heart out/You'll rip my heart right out/If you still care at all/Don't go, tell me now/If you love me at all/Please don't, tell me now/If you still care at all/Don't go, tell me now/If you love me at all/Don't call/I throw away everything/I've written you/Oh anything/Just keep my mind from thinking/How I've had you once/Oh, I can't forget that/Sometimes I wish/I could lose you again/You're winning me over/With everything you say/You rip my heart right out/You rip my heart right out/When I let you closer/I only want you closer/You rip my heart right out/You rip my heart right out/If you still care at all/Don't go, tell me now/If you love me at all/Please don't, tell me now/Yeah, if you still care at all/Don't go, tell me now/If you love me at all/Don't call/If you love me at all


1: Goodbye Sky Harbor, Jimmy Eat World:

A 16-minute-14-second-song. Remember the first time you learned to say goodbye? Mine was when I was a little girl and the first helium balloon left my hand :(...The color was light pink. P.s. Sky Harbor is an airport in Pheonix, about 20 min from the band's hometown Mesa, AZ.

"Is tomorrow just a day like all the rest."/How could you know just what you did?/like all the rest.. How could you know just what you did?/So full of faith yet full of doubt I ask/Again/I shall ask you this once again./He said:/"I am but one small instrument."/Do you remember that?/time and time again you said don't be afraid/don't be afraid, the only voice i want to hear is yours/Again/I shall ask you this once again./He said:/"I am but one small instrument."/Do you remember that?/so here I am above palm trees so straight and tall/you are smaller getting smaller/but I still see you

2: Back to You by John Mayer:

The Live Version of this song is the best: Live at Birmingham. hhmmm what to say about this one? If a song needs to be dedicated to me by you, its most likely this one. As for me: To the one that keeps coming back to my brain, my breath, my lips. The one name I seem to come back to.

Back to you/It always comes around/Back to you/I tried to forget you/I tried to stay away/But it's too late/Over you/I'm never over/Over you/Something about you/It's just the way you move/The way you move me/Oh, I'm so good at forgetting/And I quit every game I play/But forgive me, love/I can't turn and walk away/This way/Back to you/It always comes around/Back to you/I walk with your shadow/I'm sleeping in my bed/With your silhouette/Oh, should have smiled in that picture/If it's the last that I'll see of you/It's the least that you/Could not do/Leave the light on,/I'll never give up on you,/Leave the light on,/For me too, for me too/Yeah.../Back to me/I know that it comes/Back to me/Doesn't it piss you off /Your will is not as strong/As it used to be

2. Just Watch the Fireworks by Jimmy Eat World:

Ive always wanted to sit with someone who has made my heart beat like no other: shoulder to shoulder and just watch the fireworks with them, no rush, no hurry, no where else to be but there.

Here you can be anything/And I think that scares you/I think that scares you../Here, I've been here before/But only by myself../Myself../I promised I'd see it again/I promised I'd see this with you now../I promised I'd see it again/I promised I'd see this with you now../What giving up gives you/And where giving up takes you../I have and I've been../Here in center frame/Here there's only air../And just enough space to fit../I promised I'd see it again/I promised I'd see this with you now../I promised I'd see it again/I promised I'd see this with you now../I said said said it out loud over and over/Said said said it out loud, but what do I know?/I said said said it out loud over and over again../I said said said it out loud over and over/I said said said it out loud but it did not help../I'll stop now./Just enough so I can hear you,/I stay up as long as it takes..

2: 1000 Things by Jason Mraz:

This song is new to my list. Im in love with the live version from Eagles Ballroom. Ever had someone who could just stop you, freeze you whenever you bump into them, think about them, or try to talk about them but cant seem to get the words out straight? My stomach had never felt such tingling ever before. I would describe it as that happy kid feeling of meeting someone and the wonder of how on earth it took til last minute for them to enter your life...that innocent kid feeling you get with the tingling in the stomach and that annoying but ever so refreshing giggle 0:)...

And I'm overjoyed and I'm over loved and feeling lucky/like a little boy who's just, who's hiding under covers/and looking to discover every way to play the part inside his darkened cave /the meaning of life it starts at the nightlight /close your eyes and hope you see mine /And I've, well I've seen a thousand things in one place/but I stopped my counting when I saw your face/erasing memory well I feel as though I've never seen a face before/until I saw your eyes, and they're smiling back at me through my tears /I've been counting all these years, oh/Now suddenly the thousand things I've seen were/nothing more than dreams of/of you and me/you and me quietly at a standstill /fortunately you will,/well you'll kiss me and I will kiss you back/and the fact of the matter of is/and I don't know what the latter is, oh no way/you see I always wanted to kiss you but/I always wanted to run from you/Because I always wanted to miss you/And I, always wanted to comfort you/See I love to comfort you/See but, first thing I'd say to you is baby/"How do you do?"

2: Say Goodbye, Dave Matthews Band:

One night, where only those two people matter. Tomorrow will come too soon just to remain the same.

So here we are tonight/You and me together/And the storm outside/And the fire's bright/Oh, and in your eyes/I see what's on my mind/You've got me wild/Turned around inside/Oh and then desire, see/Is creeping up heavy/Oh inside here/And the way I feel/The same way as I do now/Let's make this an evening/Lovers for a night, lovers for tonight/Why n' stay here with me/Love, tonight/Just for an evening/And when we will make it/Our passionate pictures/You and me twist up as secret creatures/And we'll stay here/Tomorrow go back to being friends/Yeah,Oh, go back to being friends/But tonight let's be lovers,/We kiss and sweat/We'll turn this better thing to the best/Of all it can offer/Oh, this rogue kiss/Tangled tongues and lips/See me this way/I'm turning and turning for you/Ah girl, ah just tonight run away/Yeah, with me for an evening/Ah, just wait and see/But then tomorrow go back to your man/I'm back to my world/And we're back to being friends/Oh wait and see me/Ah tonight let's do this thing/All we are is wasting hours/'til the sun comes/It's all ours/On our way here, yeah cause/tomorrow go back to being friends/Yeah, oh go back to being friends/Tonight let's be lovers, oh please/Tonight let's be lovers, say you will/Tonight let's be lovers, oh yeah/Tonight let's be lovers/And hear me call,/Oh soft-spoken whispering now/Well, a thing or two I have to say here/Tonight let's go all the way then/Oh lover I can see you/Just for an evening/Oh, let's strip down/Trip out at this/One evening's hour starts with a kiss/And away yeah,then/And tomorrow back to being friends yeah/And now lovers, love you, yeah,/Just for tonight, one night, love you,/And tomorrow say goodbye/Tomorrow say goodbye...

2: The Idea of You, Dave Matthews Band:

When your feelings for someone overpower you so much, you know you have to runaway from it. Listen to the Live Version it's so much more amazing: Live Trax, Vol. 6.

I saw you walk/You know you say/Like a ghost you know to me babe/Combat boots make you look silly/Oh now I see you walking home from school/You got so lost on your way/You got me feeling like a kid /But this man is no kid you know/So I'm not gonna pull your hair/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/That's why with you can't say what I mean/Wanna stay but I think I'm gettin outta here/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/Aw there you go again/I know you're shy /And I see you walk past with your friends/And I saw you laugh and whisper/And I'll talk, I want you here/But you turn back and smile at me/Aw you got me feeling okay with that/So I'm not gonna pull your hair/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/That's why with you can't say what I mean/Wanna stay but I think God get me outta here/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/Bus stop dreamer/The late night/You with me/There's something moving/You cant stop, saying that you love me/You love me, you love me/Enough, enough you make me shy/But baby, I wake up/I saw you/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/That's why with you I can't say what I mean/Wanna stay but I think I'm gettin outta here/I fall so hard inside the idea of you/Oh it's so, go on baby say it

3: Cautioners, Jimmy Eat World:

Heartbreak. Parting yourself from someone whom you know will eventually hurt you by parting from you.

The time I would spend,/with pictures I would not send./I watched you go from left to right,/I followed you all night./Across my blinds./You'll change your mind come Monday,/and turn your back on me./You'll take your steps away with hesitance,/Take your steps away from me./I'm making my peace,/making it with distance./Maybe that's a big mistake,/you know I'm thinking of you./I miss you./You'll change your mind come Monday,/and turn your back on me./You'll take your steps away with hesitance,/You'll take your steps away from me./You'll change your mind come Monday,/and turn your back on me./You'll take your steps away with hesitance,/You'll take your steps away from me.

3: 23 by Jimmy Eat World:

Is Dearly Special. This song is so real whether or not im stuck in the moment of what the song says. The emotion in the voice and in the beat is one of kind, the type to send a chill and give you goosebumps thats its so powerful.When Jimmy came to play at our school, it took this song to make me really really really believe I was finally seeing them with my own two eyes, I admit to a few tears when this song was played that day 0:)...but *ssshhhhh*

I felt for sure last night/That once we said goodbye/No one else will know these lonely dreams/No one else will know that part of me/Im still driving away/And I'm sorry every day/I wont always love these selfish things/I wont always live/not stopping/It was my turn to decide/I knew this was our time/No one else will have me like you do/No one else will have me, only you/You'll sit alone forever/If you wait for the right time/What are you hoping for?/I'm here and now I'm ready/Holding on tight/Dont give away the end/The one thing that stays mine/Amazing still it seems/I'll be 23/I wont always love what I'll never have/I wont always live in my regrets/Youll sit alone forever/If you wait for the right time/What are you hoping for?/I'm here and now I'm ready/Holding on tight/Dont give away the end/The one thing that stays mine/You'll sit alone forever/If you wait for the right time/What are you hoping for?/I'm here and now I'm ready/Holding on tight/Dont give away the end/The one thing that stays mine...

Overall, I think im kinda glad with how things took place. I started my summer in el paso and ended it in el paso seeing my baby...everything in between: the part of not working sucked, but on the otherhand, im glad about the time i got to spend with my parents and especially my annoying brother hehe...aww you know i love youuu, cacheton! haha. I got involved in the kitchen most of the time. I found a camp thingy i only got to go to for like a week..ok like 3 days, so that wasnt too bad either (babe, im just remembering that i didnt get to mention that to ya, i sowiee). I tried taking the written test for driving two more times outta my three...missed 8 questions EVERY TIME totally sucked! (babe, i didnt' get to mention that to ya either...i was too disappointed. besides I failed the third time only bc i went back on the same day after the second try, only to fail yet again). I got to see my Mel and Amy...I missed Lulu :( but it was still awesome.The time between the end of july and time prior going to el paso, were possibly the worse and overwhelming, but ive been well recooperating, this time really doesnt deserve to be mentioned but it will only bc it was a hard time for me and tj, as well, and im happy to report im moving forward with him by my side ( i thank my lucky stars i was able to see him one more time before summer ended).  Ahhh and finally to the sweet times i got to spend in the clouds daydreaming, that kept me smiling and feeling good inside and most of the time keeping me sane, i wont forget youu and what it did to me. .

My Summer Song: 41, Dave Matthews.