Alright I need to vent so I am giving fair warning if you don’t want to hear me bitch and moan then I would close this now.

Here goes. I think that I am a fairly good person I don’t go fuck anything in sight I don’t do drugs (anymore) I stay home and take care of my mother at the expense of my failing attempt at a social life. I think I sacrifice a lot for my family, but I think that they went too far this time. So let me tell you that my sister is getting sealed to her family in the LDS temple and I am very proud of her for turning her life around and achieving this goal, but I don’t think that I should be punished because I am not the church going temple worthy goodie-goodie my parents expect me to be. Today my family went to the temple to do some weird shit I don’t understand and they are going to get sealed tomorrow, and everything about the church is a huge deal for my family so we are having a big shindig for both, and it just so happens that I am lucky enough to have them at my house, RIGHT LUCKY. So my family decided that I will be the babysitter for guess how many kids I dare you guess… nope try again… 10 kids yes that’s not a typo I said 10 all by myself aren’t I the lucky one. Children are the spawn of Satan all they do is eat, shit, complain (he’s touching me she’s calling me names), and worst of all cry and OH GOD DO THEY CRY. There was one kid that cried for 4 hours out of the five I was watching them. Can you imagine crying for 4 hours let alone dealing with a kid that does. That’s enough to put a bullet in my head right there not including the fact that I had to take care of 9 others plus make a feast for the rest of my 6 brothers and sisters and their spouses.

I try not to smoke in front of my family which makes it even harder because therefore I cannot smoke in front of the kids and trying to keep 10 kids in the house for 7 minutes while I take a break is impossible. You smokers out there know how hard it is when your under stress to not smoke yeah I hate kids I told my family today that I don’t care I’m never having kids I might as well get fixed right now. That is the best birth control ever, babysitting 10 kids yeah I’m going to think twice before anyone gets near me. So anyway they all told me they would be gone for 2-2 1/2 hours so 5 hours later when they return they all come in tired, and hungry, and so all of my brothers and sisters are eating. And guess what they have the audacity to say to me “if I were a RICHEOUS person that I wouldn’t have to stay here and be punished by watching the kids” what the hell they can go screw themselves they are punishing me for not being religious isn’t that against the law didn’t we come here for freedom to choose ourselves and not what others told us was right. I am so pissed at that I don’t know if I’m going to be there tomorrow why should I stay there suffering to try and support my sister if she won’t support me, if I am an outcaste in my own family and home.

Anyway then someone makes a mess about a pound of salt gets spilled on the carpet and if that gets in too deep the carpet will get ruined and that would suck so I get my exhausted ass up and get the little dust buster hand vacuum which sucks it up and spills it out as fast as I can pick it up and everyone is putting their 2 cents in. which is not what I needed so I get the real vacuum and I get so frustrated at everyone making comments about it that I throw everything down and hop in the car to go smoke. I am seriously gong to have a break down. When I get back everyone is still there and I don’t want to smell like smoke so what do I do. the nice thing, I clean the basement, that was hit by a tornado, and slowly they trickle out and leave. Thank god for that and you know what. there is no way I’m going to get stuck watching them ever again, never will I ever do that. The way I see it is they can kiss my ass, I’ve been helping them forever, what have they done for me nothing I can think of, besides my one sister. Okay well I think I’m done for now and if you didn’t like listening to me bitch well that’s your own damn fault I warned you in the beginning.