I've written a couple blogs about sex and sluts and so forth and gotten a lot of comments about how you're doing the right thing if you use a condom.  That's the qualifier to not be disgusting or a slut or...

The truth is, I hate condoms.  They are horrible.  The last time I made a guy use one was back in 1991.  I was married and my husband and I had agreed to not make a baby right away.  I went on birth control but it was hard on my body.  I couldn't eat, got sick all the time and bled like a stuck pig. (It grosses me out too, but I'm telling it for a reason).  So I went off the pill and he started using condoms. 

Condoms are horrible.  When a guy wears a condom it tends to slide at times and stick and pull at other times.  Latex is nothing like skin.  Its unpredictable and hurtful at times.  And worse than that, a penis in a condom has no natural shape.  It's like a tube.  A natural penis has a head that teases and tortures.  The skin is silky smooth and nice to the touch of intimate female parts.  The condomed penis is so not as good as the natural one.  No comparison.

But.....I've got a point to make here. 

Condom use is not the ultimate way to have safe sex....

Here are my points:

1.  I got pregnant with my husband when the condom broke.

2.  Why is not learning about the other persons habits the ultimate way?  If you talk enough and know they don't sleep around and you don't sleep around, why shouldn't you be able to be more secure in that than in a condom that might bust?  If you don't think they are telling the truth, they probably aren't.  If they say they aren't seeing anyone else, then suggest a nightly conversation before you go to sleep.  Point is, pay attention to what they say and how they act and see if they are playing the field or honest.  Don't sleep with them if they aren't trustworthy.

3.  Have a fool proof way to not get pregnant if you don't want to. I know this is hard.  For a guy it means getting a vesectomy and for a woman it's either getting a tubal ligation or at least a shot every three months.  Any of these are reversable if things change, but isn't it worth it to keep from having an accident that turns into a person?  (my accident turned into a person but it was with my husband and we were both ecstatic but that isn't always the case)

4. Avoid stds by being careful and also by getting check ups regularly.  There's no reason that people who have sex once a year won't get a std and no guarantee those who sleep around will.  Just get checked out and take care of yourself.

If you do all that, I say, have sex as much as you want with as many as you want and have fun. We only live once and as long as we're responsible, we shouldn't have to give up fun.

What do you think?

I love this song...metioned it to a freind recently and they didn't understand what I meant by it.

So, I thought I'd just post it here.  I love this song.  The lyrics, the music, the meaning behind it is so poignant with me..I hope it speaks to others also.

We don't always understand what our loved ones are going through, but sometimes it brings us to that place too without any reason other than loving them.

Hope you all enjoy the song.  Do you know where Rob Thomas came from?

This blog is dedicated to a friend of mine that has been down lately.  I hope they come out of it soon.  Whether they do or not, I'll still be there.  Hey, Rob would so why not me? lol

So do you like the song?

So let's say you're a normal single guy. You work, pay your bills, and like to go out on the weekends.  It's Friday night and you go out with your friends and you meet this woman.  She's hot and sexy and you flirt and dance and laugh...enjoy each others company.  Then she says, 'Hey, let's go somewhere private.'  You totally agree and spend the night with her.  The next morning, you think about all the things you need to do so you kiss her, smile, exchange numbers and maybe you'll do it again.

Then you go home and clean house, pay bills, do laundry, eat, play video games...your normal day off stuff...and then your phone rings and it's your Friends With Benefits girl that you haven't slept with in months.  She says she's in the neighborhood and wants to come see you.  You remember how great the sex is, how much you miss her, how long it's been...and you say 'Sure.  Just give me an hour.'

You shower again and scrub thoroughly, brush your teeth and pour a couple glasses of wine.

She shows up and you have a wonderful 'making up for lost time' night.

Does that make you a male slut?  Or just a normal single man?

Now that you've answered that.....let's flip the script.


What if you're a single woman and you have these same experiences...sex with two guys in the same weekend.  Are you a slut then?

I'm really curious about your honest responses.  Thanks in advance. And have a good week regardless. :)

It's often that I hear people (comedians especially) make jokes about the opposite sex.  I am not naming names here, but lots of people, whether on stage or on myspace tend to have fun talking about the ridiculousness or idiocracy of the opposite sex.

Women talking about how retarded men can be.  Men talking about how retarded women can be.

I figured I'd do something different.  I'd talk about how retarded I can be.

I'm titling it Super Loser. 

Hope it's at least a little funny.

So....I meet a guy.  He seems pretty nice and fairly nice looking and although he has some weird moments like when he gets mad at the waiter for bringing the steak overcooked, I appreciate how he apologizes afterwards and leaves a generous tip and let it go.  Then six months later, I find myself wondering if I should have left him right then when he goes on a ten minute rant when I overcooked the macaroni. 

Yeah, he was off but I really should have known it.  I take notes though.  'Wound a little too tight' is no longer acceptable.

Then I date a guy and he is really great.  He fixes stuff and buys stuff and calls every day...all good.  But when it comes to intimacy, he has olfactory issues and therefore doesn't do oral and won't explain why.  I do know why but when I ask he won't answer.  He's all fine with receiving though.  I dealt with that for three months.  Surprising, I know, but at least I got a lot of repairs done in the meantime.

btw, a friend told me this line 'If it smells like cologne, leave it alone.  If it smells like fish, eat that dish.'  Quite the opposite perspective (and sounds really gross) but much more real.

And then there was the user guy who lived off of me and stole money from me and when I packed up his stuff for him to leave he moved two blocks away and stalked me.  I chased him down the alley late one night barefoot and almost caught him.  I'm not sure why I didn't put on shoes before he showed up.  I knew he was coming. 

That one wasn't very funny.  It still fits the Super Loser idea though.

I suppose the most Super Loser experience I had that I can remember at the moment is when I was really young and inexperienced.  I was having sex with this guy who was a piece of work because he had been burned by his ex.  I didn't recognize any of it at the time.  I just thought he was experienced and a bit weird when he asked me to trim his armpit hairs.  I did it...nothing wrong with a hygenic man I thought.  And then one night during some intimate moment he said , 'do you do 69?'  I had no idea what that was but since I didn't know, I wasn't about to commit to eating his ass out or whatever that might mean so I panicked and said, 'Uh, no.' and got up, got dressed and left. 

The next day I asked my friend what that meant and laughed at my Super Loser status when she told me.  I knew about oral sex but had never heard it called that.  wtf?

Anyway, never heard from that guy again.  Guess he had to find someone else to trim his pit hairs.

I'm sure there are many more.  Maybe I'll come up with a few soon.  Any Super Loser moments in your life?

I believe that I could be a psychiatrist or psychologist.  I think about why all the time.

Like, why do we slow down at the scene of a traffic accident that happened on the other side of the highway?

Why do we share stories of stupid people?

Why do we laugh at stupid people?

Why do we worry about things like our kids getting their teeth brushed properly and yet allow rotten teeth people to work with us and not tell them how their teeth are disgusting?

Why do we do the things we do?

I received an email from MichaelSSEC and I laughed and then I thought about this..

So, here's what I got in the email...

It's time again for the annual 'Stella Awards'! For those unfamiliar with

these awards, they are named after 51-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled

hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico ,

where she purchased coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee

and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think

one could get burned doing that, right? That's right; these are awards for the

most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of

cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy.

Here are the Stellas for the past year:

*SEVENTH PLACE*

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her

peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running

inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised

by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

Start scratching!

* SIXTH PLACE *

Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical

expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.  Truman

apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he

was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

Scratch some more...

* FIFTH PLACE *

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , who was leaving a house he

had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the

automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the

garage door to open. Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door

connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut.

Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT days and survive on a case of

Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance

company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the

insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should

all have this kind of anguish. Keep scratching. There are more...

Double hand scratching after this one...

*FOURTH PLACE*

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella's

 when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on

the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a

chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked

for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the

time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the

yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

Pick a new spot to scratch, you're getting a bald spot..

* THIRD PLACE *

Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a

Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled

soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the

floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier

during an argument. What ever happened to people being responsible for

their own actions?

Only two more so ease up on the scratching....

*SECOND PLACE*

Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in

a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor,

knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to

sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover

charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000....oh, yeah,

plus dental expenses.  Go figure.

Ok. Here we go!!

* FIRST PLACE *

This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was: Mrs. Merv

Grazinski, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased new 32-foot

Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, from an OU football

game, having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at

70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of the

Winnebago to make herself a sandwich.  Not surprisingly, the motor

home left the freeway, crashed and overturned.

Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting

in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat

while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her,

are you sitting down?

$1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their

manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any

relatives who might also buy a motor home.

Are we, as a society, getting more stupid....

or are more members of Congress serving on juries these days?



I have an opinion about why  but I don't want to sway your thoughts so I'm not going to say them.

Why did I, and do you sometimes, enjoy reading things like this?


The original point to this blog was to ask why we get entertained by people who are idiots like this...but no one really went with that idea.  Everyone just talked about the stories, being false, being like real life, etc.  Fair enough.


But I'm going to add a true story that I know happened.  And then I'm going to ask you to tell me, if you can, why we enjoy reading this kind of stuff? 


There's an ambulance chaser.....A lawyer that gets on tv and says 'have you been hurt in an accident?  Call 1 800 Help Me and I will get you a ton of money for your pain and suffering'.


I'm sure you've seen ads on tv like this.  1 800 SueTheirAssesOff or something like that, right?

Well there's this guy who's always advertising just like that around here.  To the point that little kids can quote the tv ad.  Well, he was in an accident recently.  He didn't yield the right of way to the ambulance and his mercedez was totaled and he ended up in the hospital with serious injuries.

Back on tv afterward, visibly slimmer, he said 'I was in an accident recently and I took care of myself and I can take care of you too'.


I honestly don't know if he sued or if he won or lost the suit, if he just paid or what.  All I know is, he's one of the reasons we shake our head at the stupidity of this country.  Oh, and sidenote, the last wreck I was in was back in 04.  It was my fault.  I pulled out and a car was in a dip and I didn't see it so it hit me.  The passengers walked away and I called my insurance company, took responsibility and they offered them a sum to cover the repairs of the car.  They went home and called the popular ambulance chaser.  In the end, they all settled for the same amount my insurance company offered in the first place, the amubulance chaser got his cut and my insurance company dropped me.

Point of the story....dont' call 1-800 Ambulance Chaser.


So why do we find stories like this, accidents on the side of the road, idiots in life entertaining?  Any idea?

I have no idea what category this should be in. Myspace? But some who do this are not even on myspace. 

Friends?  I wouldn't consider them friends....

Life?  Is it a part of natural life to have people stalk you?

I'm thinking that I should sell a book very soon. That will make it easier to deal with the people who creep me out.

At least I will be getting paid for it. Even if it's 95 cents a book.

Because right now, I'm kinda freaked out at the things weirdo stalkers are doing and it's all for free.

So, in an effort to justify the weirdo stalkers that are freaking me out, I'm going to post a bit of a story next. If they love/hate me at least they should have a good reason, right?

I'm posting a bit of a story, completely rough..no editing...no endiing or middle... just something to enjoy...like all my blogs....Enjoy them...please. If you don't then move on..

This beginning is called Beth..mostly because I haven't finished the story yet...

Beth took her suitcases out of the hall closet and threw them on the bed. She opened drawers, one after the other and grabbed the contents out of each one and stuffed it all into the suitcases, not caring whether they were folded or sorted or anything else that she was supposed to care about.

When all four suitcases were full, she closed them one by one, letting her anger out on the zippers. Then she looked around haphazardly to see if there was anything obvious that she would miss.

Her purse lay on the top of the dresser. She grabbed it and one of the suitcases and took them to the garage and flung them in the car. Back she went for more until all of them were in the back seat in no particular order. She went back inside, remembering the closet of clothes she had paid no attention to. So many things hanging there, she didn’t feel like getting them all. One armful and she was out of there.

Picking up her keys, Beth slammed the door behind her and started the car. She was leaving and she wasn’t looking back. Enough was enough and she had taken way too much already. If he was surprised to come home and find her gone, that would be his just desserts. If not, oh well. She really didn’t care what he thought at this point, or any point in the future for that matter. She was rid of him, and it was permanent.

As she drove she fumed inside. She had given him ten years of her life, ten long years. She had taken his crap every time things weren’t perfect and dealt with his fits when she didn’t comply to his every whim with a smile on her face. She just could not take one more day of it. She had driven a whole five minutes when her cell phone rang. With one hand on the wheel, she fumbled in her purse with the other. Feeling the phone in her fingers, she pulled it out and without even looking to see who was calling she flung it out the window. She watched it hit the pavement and bounce a few times.

Beth cracked a smile. It was the first time she had smiled in days, but it didn’t last long. She looked down at her hand and saw the wedding ring that was still burning her finger. Using her teeth, she extracted her finger from the rings’ binding grasp, took it in her hand and flung it out the window too, a bit harder than she had thrown the phone. She couldn’t see where it landed.What a shame. It would have been nice to see it break into small bits along the hot highway.

This is a small bit of my writing and complete fiction but it's the reason I even have a blog here.  I don't come here to compete or argue or have drama.  There's enough of that in real life.  I come here to have fun, laugh, think, talk, discuss and share my writing. That's all. So, do you like my story?