JANUARY 8 2009
WIG OUT! GET YOUR GLAM ON!
With Performances by
SOUNDS OF ASTEROTH
Jean Natalia
Ian MacKinnon and Angelita of Discount Cruise to Hell
Aaron and Atom
Michael Lucid
H.R.
Muff N' Stuff
Creekbird
Auntie Biotic
Glam Booth by Toy Surprise
AND MORE TBA!!!
DJ MY LITTLE PONY AND DJ SPINNY WILL WIG YOU RIGHT ROUND!

Sounds of ASTEROTH would like to formally invite all of our friends and fans to our upcoming show at the fabulous El Cid this Friday the 16^th  at 10pm. We are honored to be playing with the amazing Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players (a band that we think you will really enjoy), and we are also very thrilled to be intruding some new blood to the brood (you'll have to come to find out who). This show is also exceptionally marked in that Sprinkle, our former vocal sprite, will be returning for a one night only performance. If you only catch one Sounds of ASTEROTH performance, let this be the one!

 

 

XOXO

Sounds of ASTEORTH:

Martin Von Sexy

Gabriel Von Lead

Rich Von Rythme

Sir Von Top

Cotton Candy

Cherry Nova

Kimberly Drummin'

Crème Fillin'

Blow Pop

Puddin'

Sprinkle

And more!

 

Sounds of Asteroth: Avant garde cabaret-style group with a show that connects via skilled musicianship and theatrical flair.


The Players: Martin Von Sexy, vocal stylings, tambourine; Gabriel Von Lead, lead guitar; Rich Von Rythme, rhythm guitar; Sir Von Top, bass guitar; Just-In-Time, drums, beat master; Cherry Nova, backup singer; Cotton Candy, backup vocals.

Material: Dark and brooding at times, funky and flashy at others, Sounds of Asteroth run the musical gamut. Using an avant garde caba-ret approach to both songwriting and performance this group ties together disparate musical genres to create a unified sound. Despite the reliance on performance, the compositions are strong enough to exist as strictly aural works. However, to fully appreciate what this group of mavericks has to offer, one must engage in the complete experience.


Musicianship: There is a high level of musicianship in this band. The focal point is Martin Von Sexy, whose surprisingly deep vocals and charismatic stage presence command attention despite the myriad of musical, and non-musical, activity taking place across the stage. The backup vocals of Cherry Nova and Cotton Candy add an intriguing subtlety, as well as contrast, to Von Sexy's lead. The two-pronged guitar attack of Von Lead and Von Rythme is balanced by the drumming by Just-In-Time and the bass grooves of Sir Von Top, who especially shine on the funkier numbers.


Performance: At first impression, Sounds of Asteroth was a chaotic mess of sights and sounds. But, it quickly became evident that this group is in fact a well-orchestrated cabaret show. Ultimately, it was impossible to separate the performance from the music.


Summary: Quintessentially a live act, Sounds of Asteroth exists at the intersection of music and performance art. This is an eye-opening and talented group of musicians and performers.


––Ben Nachman

Elevator Down

It happened at the St. Martin Hotel

The lights when out in my elevator cell

And the lady started to cry

She saw her life flash right before her eyes

We're going down...down...down...

We're going down to the place where nobody lives

We're going down

We're going down to the ground floor of anonymity

We're going down

We're gonna find it gets hot in this tiny space

We're going down!

We're gonna gonna find who's underneath your face

WE'RE GOING DOWN

It happened at the St. Martin Hotel

We fell so deep we tumbled into hell

And the wire started to fray

And the lady fell down to her knees to pray...

We're going down...down...down...

We're going going to the place where nobody lives (nobody lives)

We're going down

We're going down down in a state of anonymity

We're going down

We're gonna find it gets hot in this tiny space

We're going down

We're gonna find who's underneath yur face

WE'RE GOING DOWN

(bridge)

If this is the end than let us pretend that we are the oldest and dearest of friends

If we're gonna die on this terrible ride than tell me the secret behind those eyes

If this is the end than let us pretend that we are the oldest and dearest of friends

It happened at the St. Martin hotel...St. Martin Hotel

The Inventor

When I'm alone I have a secret that I never talk about

I have a secret room that none of my friends they are privy to

I have a plastic melting gun that helps to glue the shiny parts

And underneath the wooden floor a metal key for a silver door

I'm working on a new machine that keeps my eyes and windows clean

I'm working on a telephone that tells the ex to leave me alone

I'm working on a tiny car that parks itself no matter where you are

I'm working on a big balloon that keeps the air fresh in every room

I tinker with the tiny parts from the 20 toys that I took apart

I tape a wire up to my chest and I attempt to start my my heart

I take a million Christmas lights and tie them to my bicycle

I'm inventing a time machine just like the one on the TV screen

I'm working on a trampoline that helps me bounce back from tragedy

I'm programing an ATM that knows sometimes it is okay to lend

I'm inventing a clock that tells me when it is time to stop

I'm inventing a rhyme that doesn't sound like every other rhyme

Keep my eyes and windows clean so I can see so I can see, so I can see

EYES!

Martin Von Sexy: Hi GQ, how are you?

Gangsta Queen: I'm good...a lil' tired from partying this weekend. I'm at TGI Friday's right now, havin some deep fried zucchini and a big ol' diet coke. I'm kinda a health nut.

MVS: Of course, You always look so healthy!

GQ: Thank You. How you doin?

MVS: I'm great, I'm in Las Vegas right now getting inspiration at The Liberace Museum.

GQ: Oh my goodness, my hometown!! You been to Circus Circus yet? That place WAS the bomb, until they fired me. I used to work there as a clown, but apparently I wear too much makeup. You ever heard of such a thing?

MVS: Those Nazis! I love a woman with a heavy face of make-up! I grew up in Vegas. Did you know that they tore down the Stardust?

GQ: I'm cool with the Stardust being torn down as long as they still gots all those buffets ..if it wasn't for my caffeine pill addiction I woulda been a big ol' heffa while I lived there. Anyway, how's life in the S of A?

MVS: Funny you should ask, I was just thinking about my band. It's great, we have new songs, new members, and in the immortal words of the Pointer Sisters...A NEW ATTITUDE!. We are also very excited to be sharing the stage with royalty!

GQ: OMG..I'm so excited...it's gon' be fantastic!! It's this Saturday, right?

MVS: YES!!! You're not gonna pull a no call no show like you did at The Baskin Robbins are you?

GQ: Hell no! 'cause it's all about me now! I make the rules and I'm certainly not gon' fire myself...i'll be there. Are all your fabulous dancers gon' be there? Is puddin' gon' be there? That's my sista.

MVS: Oh yeah, puddin' will be there, nappy hair and all. I actually put her on the flyer! She went out and got those long green finger nails just so she would match the song! Now that's devotion to duty i tell ya! The dancers have become such an integral part of the show. Did you know that almost all of them are bisexual?

GQ: Uh oh! I hope none of yo female dancers try to get up on all this cause I am strictly dickly...unless it's for a movie role and integral to the plot...

MVS: You're like the Charlize Theron of rap!

GQ: 'Cept not lookin like a monster!!!..

MVS: LOL, of course not! You always look to the 9's! My dancers are always marveling at your gorgeousness!

GQ: That's so nice...hmm..Martin, have you ever been with one of your dancers? Physically, I mean.

MVS: Wow, you don't hold back do you?

GQ: Life is too damn short, okay.

MVS: Yes, way too short, like Danny Devito.

GQ: Lol....So. what's your answer?

MVS: Hold your horses Gangsta Queen...The cocktail waitress is flirting with me! Which brings me to your question...I don't believe in mixing business with pleasure. But if I was to hook up with one of them it would have to be...hmm...Terre Misu. I think she would set me straight...cough, cough...

GQ: Oooh la la, you're like the pied piper of pussy, huh? I guess that happens when you're a sexy ass rock star....or rap star...

MVS: I think I'm sexy in a campy way. Like Menudo meets Bel-Ami with a dash of Aladdin. It's weird, cuz when boys and girls hit on me after the show it's the fantasy that they're hitting on, not me.

GQ: I know all about that...

MVS: I'm sure you do!

GQ: Oooh, Bel Ami, i love that place..

MVS: Actually it's a not a place it's a...

GQ: I went there for spring break..it was off the chain.. i ain't never seen so many neon bikinis,,

MVS: No, Bel Ami is actually a...

GQ: I'm STILL tired from that vacation..but not too tired too put on a kick ass show on Saturday...where is it again?

MVS: Oh Jeez, Gangsta Queen you would lose your head if it wasn't attached...

GQ: that's actually true, because I lose my hair when it's not attached....

MVS: We are playing at The Stone. It's a cute little club on Hollywood Blvd in between Western and Vermont. It's a Thai club, and it's great because the bartenders don't speak a lick of English. You can order a Rum and Coke and get a Mai-tai. It's always an adventure!

GQ: As long as they understand Thai Iced Tea...I want one of those right now...like i said i'm a health nut.

MVS: Yeah, Thai Iced Teas are really good for you. I read that in Men's Health. There's like a lot of water in them or something. I'm getting free screwdrivers here at the fabulous Sahara!

GQ: Screwdrivers, huh? Those get me fucked up...are you fucked up right now?

MVS: Oh no, I just take tiny sips and then walk away. I don't really like to drink because I end up doing naughty things if you know what I mean?

GQ: Oh yes, honey, i know all about naughty things...but I can't imagine walking away from a drink..that's alcohol abuse, child..

MVS: Yes, I hear you know how to put 'em away. I guess my big dark secret is that I'm a dorky homebody that's never done coke.

GQ: Good!!! You shouldn't do coke...it'll ruin your life...i was fucked up for years...I was more like a court jester than a queen in those days. But I'm a survivor..Music saved my life.

MVS: So it's just diet coke these days, huh? BTW I loooooooooooove The Beat is in my ASS! How did you come up with that?

GQ: The Beat is in My Ass?...i leave that one open...so many people think different things about that song...I say, "Let Them Eat Cake."..

MVS: I agree, I feel the same way about my paintings. I won't explain them...it pisses people off a little bit. When I heard The Beat Is My Ass i thought it was about getting an ass poundin' while listening to Susan Vega's Tom's Diner.

GQ: Oh my goodness gracious...well, if that what's you think it's about then that's what it's about.....oh snap..my cousin Aquafina keeps calling me...i'm supposed to meet her at Ross...she needs some serious fashion tips...I gotta go, but It was lovely to chat wit ya.

MVS: Yes, I should also jet...The air conditioning is making me wheeze. See you on Saturday AT THE STONE!!! Write it on your hand 5221 Hollywood Blvd. THE STONE!!! It's like the word stoner without the er at the end.

GQ: Got it. I'll see you on Saturday at the Store..Peace.

I thought you were special but honey you weren't special

You're typical like a TV show

You were sweet at first but by the end of the book your plot turned to a donut-twist

You borrowed my CD's and 17 DVD's

They came back scratched and abused

You ate the last cookie in the cookie jar

When you knew that it wasn't for you.

Baby, honey, darling I don't mean to sound like a square

But the way you treated me was more than just a little bit unfair

Baby, honey, darling I don't mean to sound like a square

But the way you treated me was more than just a little bit unfair

They say that love it blindfolds the mind

The smell of love made me partially blind

I must be a fool to think that such a fool

Could understand a man such as me

You decrypted the code

On my secret phone

You Nancy Drewed through my drawers

But the irony is that you were the one

The one that pulled a fast one on me

Baby, honey, darling I don't mean to sound like a square

But the way you treated me was more than just a little bit unfair

Baby, honey, darling I don't mean to sound like a square

But the way you treated me was more than just a little bit unfair

You lost me forgot me

You used me abused me

You wronged me you strung me

Deceived me disowned me

You stripped me unzipped me

You tore me you ripped me

Unloved me returned you

You crushed me you burned me

You broke me erased me

Released me avoid me

Delete me you blocked me

You need me you drowned me

You faked it you phoned it

Pretend it you loaned it

You bitter you're shameless

You're phony you're aimless

A couple hours ago we landed on our home planet of Glimmer and we are quite happy to be home, but we are already missing Earth terribly! Our November Residency at Kiss or Kill was a most wonderful experience indeed! We went through all our gold glitter, 15 wigs, my favorite pair of sunglasses, a gallon of fog juice, 500 bobby pins, and alota make-up. We wanna thank Cooper, and Matt of Bang Sugar Bang, and Johnny 99 of Silver Needle for giving us the chance to sparkle at Kiss or Kill. They, and their bands, fuckin' rock the kasbah! Also, If you enjoy our new pix it's all the handy work of Mr. Jed Johnson. Whom we met at our Kiss or Kill residency. Jed is a fearless artist who will stop at nothing to capture the perfect image (check out his pic of Dawn taken thru a star tambourine while it's being used on stage)! He's by far the most talented photographer we've had the joy to encounter. Thank you for everything Jed, you and your talent rule! There was also a pre residency show at Kiss or Kill in which two of our members couldn't play and we had the luck of getting two gems. Mike Satin of Chromosome Tea on bass, and April Brown (Cotton Candy) on vox. Thank you guys for doing a spectacular job. You guys blended in so well my mom didn't even notice the difference (of course she doesn't speak a word of English and is partially blind but still she can hear)! We also played with a plethora of bands that all rocked and we are honored to have shared the stage with. Including but not limited to: Bang Sugar Bang, Silver Needle, Soda and his Million Piece Band, Pussy Cow, The Makeout Bandits, The Underwater City People, Nu-Tra, She's Your Sister, The New Fidelity, and Porterville. We would love to join forces with all of you again. Last but not least, a special thank you goes out to a very sweet girl by the name of Liz. Who attended every single show and was kind enough to bring Uncle Eddie's Vegan cookies. We hope you are surviving your hang over Liz. I have to say that the coolest thing about playin' at Kiss or Kill (besides the cake) was the energy in the room. All the people that show up are super supportive and ready to have a ball. The hipsters are notably absent and the starlets are no shows for this party. Kiss or Kill is about having fun and listening to music and we're pleased that we are a part of it. From Planet Glimmer, Martin