Our label had told us how important a ‘territory’ Mexico is for us (they love using words like that) so we booked a swing through 3 cities after our US jaunt. We felt like real rock stars there. We even got to hold our very first press conference – just like the Beatles! Here’s my view from the firing line (see if you can spot J-Ha again – he pops up a couple of times in this post, along with Stephen, our lovely manager):

We’d been treated to some fine Mexican spirits – Mezcal, Pulque and Passito – beforehand, so apologies to you journalists if our answers were not concise and to the point.

One thing I didn’t get about Mexico, though, was how all the promoters tried to dissuade us from eating Mexican food during the trip: they all seemed to think that somehow we wouldn’t be able to handle it. Now, aside form being food explorers here at Metronomy, we’ve had more stag night vindaloos than you Mexican promoters have had hot tacos, amigos, and we’re doing fine, thanks. In our hosts’ defence, apparently Sigur Ros had to cut their recent Guadalajara set short due to ‘Montezuma’s Revenge’. Guess it’s not just Icelandic banks that have ‘runs’, eh lads?

When we got back to the venue in Puebla, just before it opened, we found a brace of art students hand-drawing Metronomy logos on balloons ready for the party. Great work ladies! They looked amazing.

 

In Mexico City we had a great time meeting up with Ximena Saranina, the Mexican singer. Joseph had remixed one of the tracks from her album, and she joined us onstage during the encore to sing it live. Our first ever guest vocalist – what a blast! Shame Joe couldn’t pronounce her name at any stage during the evening. It came out something like Juan-Meena. She hasn’t returned any of our calls. Here she is. This was during our meal with her before it all went sour.

 

Our last show, in Monterrey, ended with a bang. We ended up inviting what seemed like half the audience into our dressing room for a big party. There was a record deck and a fine selection dance party music from the 90s. Stephen was in his element – it reminded him of his youth I guess. We played tracks like ‘Horny’ by Mousse T and danced the night away.

 

The next morning it was home time. We took three flights over 24 hours and arrived back to an England covered in snow. After travelling over 7,000 miles in one day, Oscar and J-Ha were stranded in London, unable to travel the remaining 50 miles down to the South Coast. Ah beloved Blighty! How we missed you.

Here’s lucky Joseph with the money he won. Me and Oscar, of course, lost heavily. Plus ça change, eh?

Vegas is basically everything everyone’s told you about - I don’t need to go into it here. It was the first stop on a trip up to the heartbreakingly beautiful Pacific North West. You go from the America that puts you off your drink by bragging to you about how many Spring Break titties he’s squeezed, to the America that you want to put your arm around and say, “hey, you were all right all along, weren’t you?” You go from this:

 To this:

Now, call me a pussy fag homo liberal, but I’d like to buy this sign a beer.

Portland Oregon is rad. It’s where our driver, Sean, lives and it’s like a little stab at utopia nestled in Ewok-land style countryside. Vancouver, likewise. Seattle – ditto. Good times and thanks to everyone who came to the shows and made them so special. I think an honourable mention here should go our touring partners, the Mae Shi.

 
Hanging out with them is like going on a stag weekend with the cast of ‘Yo Gabba Gabba!’ It was so nice playing with another novelty band.

LA next – that gets a blog all of its own. Pip pip!

Look at Oscar, ignoring Jørn Utzon's graceful, expressionist Sydney Opera House and the sights of beautiful Sydney Harbour.  He's on the lookout for something, I'm sure of it.

Is it the much-maligned Ibis he seeks - the scavenger bird and scourge of Sydney, cousin in temperament to the familiar seagulls of Oscar's native Brighton? There sure are plenty of them at the Botanical Gardens, where Oscar is roaming. Watch out Oscar - he'll steal the sandwiches from your picnic rucksack quicker than you can say 'Jack Robinson'!

Or is young Oscar in search of some authentic antipodean sustenance - perhaps a sizzling sausage fresh from the outdoor barbies of Bronte beach? We were treated to a bbq by our promoters, Popfrenzy. We swam in the sea, sank a few beers, had a great time. Mmmm -  smells good, doesn't it Oscar? - but no, that's not it.

Maybe it's novelty he's after - something reminiscent of home, but just that little bit different? Maybe he's shunning the chicken sausage in favour of a Whopper meal, this time not from Burger King - but from Hungry Jacks.

I think not - that's just a little bit too weird. I can tell Oscar's in the mood for a real hunk of beef.  Wait - at last! Here he is now!

Phew! Quite the head turner, eh ladies? Quite the windswept go-getter! I'll admit it - it wasn't just Oscar; all of us in Metronomy got in a little bit of a tiz over Douglas Lance Gibson, Promoter's Rep: Our Duggie. A man's man from rural New South Wales, rugged and golden, but with an encyclopedic knowledge of all kinds of obscure indie bands with lots of 'V's in their names. Pretty much the perfect guide to Oz. Duggie accompanied us on our three date tour of Australia - Sydney, Brisbane and Melbourne. With him on board, how could anything have gone wrong? We had a ball. Thanks to everyone who came to the shows - hopefully we'll see you later in the year, Down Under.

PS - Sorry ladies: Our Duggie's taken!

Gabriel Metronomy's Tour Blog

Hey hey folks! Welcome to Auckland's knobbliest knees competition - we are officially the southern hemisphere's whitest, pastiest poms! Can you guess who's who?

I can see you're wondering why there are four sets of pale legs here - Metronomy are Joseph, Gabriel, Oscar and... who? Have we got a 'touring drummer'? Nah! Too much chatback. Have we employed a comely merch girl to attract that extra tour lucre? No chance, we're not that smart. Instead, we've brought along Stephen, our manager.

Stephen has been doing a great job of managing us from his private hotel rooms so far this tour, while we all share. Honestly, our career would probably collapse if he wasn't here to help us drink all the free beer. He'll be playing a bit-part role in these blogs over the coming weeks, I'm sure.

The shows in New Zealand were super-fun. Thankyou, people of Auckland and Wellington! We played both shows with our old friends The Teenagers, who were finishing up their year long world tour. It was an honour to play with them. Here they are with loads of hot girls on stage. They're good at making that happen. What are we doing wrong?

After the first show me and Joe DJed at a club and everyone had a chance to let their hair down. Song of the night? I would say Return of the Mack by Mark Morrison. Still underrated.

We were lucky enough to have a couple of days off after the show, so we could explore. We had lunch in a fancy winery cafe on Waiheke Island. It's basically an otherworldy paradise. Jealous yet?

If that's not enough, it even had an olive grove with its own herd of Alpacas standing guard. Oscar thought he'd died and gone to heaven. If you ever get a chance, go and see the Alpacas roaming free over the South Downs near Glynde in Sussex. It's in Oscar's personal 1000 Things To Do Before You Die, along with 'updating your myspace'. See you again soon! This time in Oz!

Gabriel Metronomy’s Tour Blog

I’ll give you one guess where we are:

No, silly!  It’s not the set of Blade Runner!  We’re in Tokyo, Japan.  It’s the start of our five-week world tour.  Exciting!  We stayed on the eighth floor of a hotel that overlooks the famous 5-way pedestrian crossing that you sometimes see on videos of the city.  Usually the people walking across are sped up and it looks really exciting and futuristic.  When we saw them they were at regular speed. It wasn’t too disappointing, it still looked cool.

Now, for first-timers like us, arriving in Japan is a total mind-fuck, but the people are so friendly and polite, and try to alleviate your addled brain with nice thoughts like this:

 

This was waiting for me in my hotel room. It contained two individually wrapped bananas, a delicious clementine, and an apple and a kiwi fruit that I can only describe as being of nightmare proportions.  Huge.  You’ll notice that they jumped the gun slightly when thanking me for the ‘hard work and fantastic performance’.  Seeing how scrambled my brain was at that point, I could have just taken the fruit and bolted.

Despite the looming, neon-covered skyscrapers, multi-level highways, constant, blaring advertising and so on, it’s the little differences that get you.  For instance, cleanliness really is taken very, very seriously.  Oscar is thinking he might name his emo band after this sign.

 

In Japan we’re lucky to be hooked up with some pretty next-level industry talent, who have managed to get our album out and about, and raised lots of interest in it.  We’re with one of the biggest live promoters around.  They look after huge stadium acts but still found time to look after lil’ ol’ Metronomy real well.  The following night they had Ne-Yo coming through town – amazing!  We took the once in a lifetime opportunity to send him a personal message.

Ne-Yo, if you’re reading this (which I know you are), we hope you enjoyed the CD!  Write us back!  You’re welcome anytime for tea and nightmarish apples!

It’s not just the major labels and huge promoters who are important to us in Japan.  In fact, our best Japanese buddy is an amazing woman called Haruka, who has a record shop and café in Harajuku named Escalator Records.  If you’re English and you like music you should drop by for a coffee and a delicious Japanese curry sometime – she’ll make you feel right at home!

 

And so to the shows.  Everything they say about visiting Japan as a band is true.  There are fans waiting outside with presents (thanks, Ayumi!), the venues are super-clean, and the fans are super-attentive.  Our two shows were with Late of the Pier and they were great fun.

 

There’s only one place I know that makes Faley look like that.  JAPAN.  See you again soon!