hmm... interesting. God is interesting. i was driving home, not really praying ,but kinda... just thinking and asking stuff of God. he's been kinda vague with my lately... or not so much, as when i was remembering ezekiel and the valley of dry bones yesterday and God said to me, "sound familiar?" and showed left me with the feeling that something new was on the way. anyway, driving home from kroger, a song came up on my ipod and i felt like i just needed to listen to it... felt like it was God telling me to, but it wasnt all that clear at first. anyway, it was "last regret" by seventh day slumber. i'd "heard" it before, but never really listened to it. so... havent posted lyrics in forever, but the song can be a little hard to understand. so if you care to, check out my profile song while reading these lyrics.
Lost in the game
Finally, I can say I'm proud of me
No hope at all
A day that I believed would never come
No one to blame
The shadows of my past have been erased
A life that only God Himself could change
I never dreamed that life could feel this way
Don't wake me, please
I've finally found the place where I belong
Only one regret
All those years I lost for nothing at all
Laughing in pain
Searching for a reason to exist
World torn apart
Excuses left me breathless and ashamed
Slipping away
I found a purpose that's worth fighting for
The memories don't haunt me anymore
the last 2 lines just hit me really strongly becasue it was in that moment true for me. i just felt full release. like it was just gone. there are still memories, but no longer the pain. something was restored tonight. if you know me well, you know ive been though hell, so to speak. bit dramatic, but not too much. and no matter what i tried i couldn't shake the past fully from my thoughts. until now. i guess time alone will tell, but as of now it seems that is finally past.
anyway, ezekiel 37...
37:1 The hand of the Lord was upon me, and he brought me out in the Spirit of the Lord and set me down in the middle of the valley; it was full of bones. 2 And he led me around among them, and behold, there were very many on the surface of the valley, and behold, they were very dry. 3 And he said to me, "Son of man, can these bones live?" And I answered, "O Lord God, you know." 4 Then he said to me, "Prophesy over these bones, and say to them, O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord. 5 Thus says the Lord God to these bones: Behold, I will cause breath to enter you, and you shall live. 6 And I will lay sinews upon you, and will cause flesh to come upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath in you, and you shall live, and you shall know that I am the Lord."
7 So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I prophesied, there was a sound, and behold, a rattling, and the bones came together, bone to its bone. 8 And I looked, and behold, there were sinews on them, and flesh had come upon them, and skin had covered them. But there was no breath in them. 9 Then he said to me, "Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to the breath, Thus says the Lord God: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe on these slain, that they may live." 10 So I prophesied as he commanded me, and the breath came into them, and they lived and stood on their feet, an exceedingly great army.
11 Then he said to me, "Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. Behold, they say, 'Our bones are dried up, and our hope is lost; we are indeed cut off.' 12 Therefore prophesy, and say to them, Thus says the Lord God: Behold, I will open your graves and raise you from your graves, O my people. And I will bring you into the land of Israel. 13 And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves, and raise you from your graves, O my people. 14 And I will put my Spirit within you, and you shall live, and I will place you in your own land. Then you shall know that I am the Lord; I have spoken, and I will do it, declares the Lord."
strange, because i remember very vividly seeing that scene unfold in my mind. it sounds odd, and i can't say for sure, but i think i remember dreaming it when i was rather young, right down to watching the bones come together as tendons grew from nowhere and attached themselves to the bones. and i think God was talking to me when he was reminding me of that passage... but i dont think he was speaking just to me. he recalled other visions to my mind and made me think of renewal. renewal has been on my mind a lot lately.
it was interesting to me... just struck me now, really... that it wasn't a one-step deal. first the army was alive... but then they died. and the bones were very dry, which means they had been dead a long time, resembling nothing of their former selves, incapable of being who they once were. then God restored them. but they were still dead, although he had made them look like what they had been. only when God breathed his Spirit into them did they reall live. i think we arent seeing enough of God's spirit... i think if we pary for anything than it must be for more, because i see so many of God's people living a dead life, wandering through it like machines, alive but really dead. we need to be filled once more. and one more thing... it was just so intriguing to me that the dead could do nothing for themselves. they couldnt make themselves more alive. only God could. and i believe He wants up to pray for renwal and new life once more. ^_^
i need to find the time to listen to what i recorded when i was praying at ahop. im not sure i can hear all of it, but im going to try to write it down. gotta find my clothes for work tomorrow now though. be blessed... lata my homies! ;)