(**I took this off planetfargo)
No one dared call him the "Boy King," for his evident youth was offset by his fearsome prowess in battle. There was no equal when young King Tyrgard took to the field of combat, his elite equipment gleaming in the sun, his heavy cloaks ornamented with bejeweled clasps, his long robes flowing down his back and upon the rear of his stallion like a silken waterfall. His gear glowed with a myriad of enchantments, every piece from his heavy plate boots to his glimmering crown representing hours and hours of painstaking gameplay.
King Tyrgard had accomplished the impossible: his guild was now the largest of his server. Of any server! His own united clans were now bonded by blood oath to the once feuding veteran guilds of the West and the vast memberships of the new guilds to the East. For the first time, they flew under a single banner. His banner. They raided together in his name and shared the lewt upon his decree. King Tyrgard the Mighty! Unmatched in battle, unequaled in lewt! Behold, he speaks now before his assembled lords:
"Blood of my blood!" he boomed, his voice echoing across the great hall. "We stand together as one. Let our voices ring out together, and let all know of our might." A raucous cry from the assembled lords was silenced only by the thunk of King Tyrgard's sword slamming into the oaken table.
"WE SHALL BUILD.... A WEBSITE!" he roared, causing the lords to leap to their feet, their cheers rattling the very stone of Tyrgard's keep.
When the aged Magemaster Garrion lifted his narrow hands aloft, a hush fell over the assembly. They awaited his wise counsel. "I submit to your grace... a field of black!" he said, his voice quavering with power. "And upon this field, the name of our guild. Our guild, in large... golden letters."
King Tyrgard closed his mailed fist and held it on high. "Our font shall be 32 points bigger than any font of any guild before us!"
The cheers of the Lords were cut short by Magemaster Garrion's sudden epiphany. "Upon either side of our guild name I see ... two ... spinning animated skull .gifs!" That brought the men back to their seats, eyes wide with horror. "Men may gaze upon them, their eyes flicked with flames, and know our power."
"So it shall be," murmured King Tyrgard. "So it shall be!" echoed the lords.
"Your Grace," intoned the great Knight Sir Pallagrad, Champion of the West, Shieldbearer to his Lordship's honor guard. "So that we may grow our numbers, I ask that our website say 'Now Recruiting,' possibly in all caps, with multiple exclamation points." Many nodded, their eyes gleaming. Sir Pallagrad was truly wise.
The noble King was about to answer, when he paused to allow Magemaster Garrion to whisper something to his ear. His eyes fluttered, and ultimately he nodded. At last, he spoke. "You shall have your recruitment," he told the Knight. "And moreover, the words 'NOW RECRUITING!!1!' shall follow the user's mouse cursor, bobbing up and down as it moves!"
The hall erupted into rowdy cheers, while flagons of ale pounded onto the great tables.
Magemaster Garrion recaptured the assembly's attention: "And 'lo, beneath the Guild Name, there shall be erected a picture of a castle, and under this castle, using Java, shall be water! That ripples! Then all men may know of our might and ingenuity!"
"Let's have a pic of that O RLY? owl!" cried a young Knight. "That thing never gets old."
"There should totally be a picture of me, like, chopping some guy's head off!" another Knight shouted. "And blood should be coming out! I can totally do that in Paint Shop Pro."
King Tyrgard, ever wise, silenced the assembled lords with an upraised palm. "Nay, beneath our stronghold we shall engrave our Guild motto in flashing blue and white text, that the words may echo in the hearts of men for all time: Duty. Honor. Booyah."
"Duty. Honor. Booyah," chanted the men.
Magemaster Garrion suddenly stumbled and clutched his withered staff for support, so strong was the vision that now appeared before his eyes. "At the bottom of our page ... I see ... fire!"
Gasps. "Is our page burning?" squeaked a young Squire, his adolescent voice breaking.
Garrion's voice grew with a terrible power as he spoke next. "Nay ... they are animated .gif flames, not one or two, but a whole row! A row of animated flames, so real they sear the eyes, such that men may gaze upon them and tremble. 'Gads, have I descended into the seven hells?' they shall ask, 'Nay! 'tis but the homepage of GUILD LASER DINOSAUR!'"
"GUILD LASER DINOSAUR! PEW PEW PEW!!" Cried the assembled lords, their voices as one.
As so their reign of terror began, for it took but ten minutes to create the webpage of Magemaster Garrion's vision. Unfortunately, later that night the guild split up because some Cleric looted a longsword that some other guy wanted, even though the sword he had was better, because he said he really needed it for his alt.