Wow, I can’t believe how quickly this year has gone by. It seems like yesterday that I was celebrating New Years and now Christmas is only 2 weeks away.

Speaking of holidays, this past Thanksgiving reminded me of how much I have to be grateful for. I have been blessed with awesome and patient friends, supportive family, good health, all of my basic necessities and then some, and a job that helps me pay bills and provides me with many opportunities to learn about myself.  Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

In addition to being grateful for my blessings, I have also made the following 3 realizations about building friendship with men:

1. If I just meet a guy and start falling for him,  maybe what I’m falling for are the character/physical attributes he has that I would want in a future husband.
2. Upon considering Realization #1, I should make a running list of these attributes.
3. If after Realization # 1 & 2  I still have warm and tingly feelings for this new guy,  then I should be careful not to quickly throw my heart at him. Instead, I could consider allowing the relationship to naturally develop into what it’s meant to become.

The three realizations above seem so simple, yet it’s amazing how many women I meet who never take the time to consider any of them, especially # 2 and #3 - and I have been guilty of this before myself. After applying the three realizations above, I find that I have so much more clarity and my friendships are full of depth while being light and fun.

On that note, I will leave you with the words of one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite Disney movies, “Rodgers And Hammerstein’s Cinderella”. This song was sang by both Cinderella and the Prince while they danced the night away. Enjoy and Happy Holidays.

——————————–

Do I love you because you’re beautiful,
or are you beautiful because I love you?
Am I making believe I see in you
a girl too lovely to be really true?

Do I want you because you’re wonderful,
or are you wonderful because I want you?
Are you the sweet invention of a lover’s dream
or are you really as beautiful as you seem?

Am I making believe I see in you
a man too perfect to be really true?
Do I want you because you’re wonderful,
or are you wonderful because I want you?

Are you the sweet invention of a lover’s dream
or are you really as wonderful as you seem?

——————————–

I realize it's been a while since I posted. Needless to say, I've had a lot going on with work and my mom and life in general. So here I am months since my last thought and boy do I have a bit to share with you. 

Are any of you out there interested in working for yourselves?  Who wouldn't want to walk away from working a 9-5? Unless you're working your dream job, there's a good chance that you've often dreamt of the day when you can work for yourself and not have to take orders from a boss. Imagine earning money online while you sleep...

Well in the pursuit of that dream, I decided to put in my 2 weeks notice at my current job and look for ways to earn money online through multiple streams of income. I know it sounds like a big risk, but no matter what happens, I have no regrets. It's such a liberating feeling to know that no one owns me. I'm willing to go broke rather then stay in a position where I'm so stressed that I'm constantly getting sick and having to go to the doctor's.

So here I was, on a quest for all the guides and tips that I could find to help me get started. That is what lead me to find Google Cash, Rich Jerk and Honest Riches 2 Now if you do a search on Google for any of these books, you'll find plenty of hype, some positive and some negative. You'll also find many claims, some real and some obviously false. But how does one figure out which of the program really works in the midst of all the confusion? This is why I decided to write this post.

Now, I am not going to tell you that this is the ultimate review of these programs, because the honest truth is that you won't know for sure whether something is right for you until you invest in it and try it for yourself. But to make your decision a little easier, here is what I think are the pros and cons of each book. I hope you find this useful.

----------------------------------

Google Cash

Pros:

 
1. Very good guide for beginners and pros may even learn a thing or two.
    
2. Covers what seems like all aspects of Adwords and includes additional ebooks and resources for those who want to know as much as they can about it.
    
3. There are lots of video guides that walk you through some of the basics as well as some of the more advanced techniques for choosing and signing up to affiliate networks, researching keywords, setting up ads, etc.
    
4. Has a step by step guide to preparing and setting up your ads.
    
5. Overall, really good information.

Cons:

   
1. Advanced marketers may find some of the info a bit basic.
    
2. I'm starting to realize more and more that time on the internet and the real world is different. So, if something was published months ago, there's a good possibilty that some of the info contained in it is a bit old. My point is that I found that one of the important resources mentioned in the book, the overture max bid tools, was no longer available and had to dig before I found an alternate (http://keyword.secretstohighprofit.com/). A newbie just starting out may have a tough time with finding alternate resources that are no longer available.
    
3. I'm also learning that there are potentially a lot more ways to make money online other then Adwords. Although the book touches on some of those ways, it focuses mainly on the adwords program.
    
4. Adwords may not be for everyone. Unless you're willing to take a financial risk, it may not work out for you. I do feel like the potential to make money is great, but I also see the potential to spend a lot of money if you're not careful.

Rich Jerk

Pros:

   
1. Despite what others may think, I actually found his frankness a bit refreshing. I find regular sales pages annoying and I kinda like the tone of not being sold to but just being told that it's up to me to decide. But hey, tha's just me.
    
2. He also provided a variety of ways and techniques to make money online, so you pick whichever one suits you.
    
3. I also thought it was neat that a couple of days after I bought the book, I received a phone call from a Rich Jerk representative. At first I thought, "Oh great, now I'm going to get telemarketers from this guys company bugging me", but after I told them that I was ok and planning on taking my time to implement what I was learning, they simply gave me the options to contact them if I needed any assistance with anything and that was that. No more phone calls since that day.

Cons:

   
1. This book is definitely not for newbies. It helped that I read the Google Cash because it set the foundation to many of the techniques he mentioned.
    
2. He does not go into step by step instructions on how to implement the techniques. He mentions then in a way that shows that he expects the reader to already know the basics.
    
3. He also has a section where he teaches you the not to honest way to get around things like getting traffic.

Honest Riches Guide 2

Pros:

   
1. A chock full of great information for getting started in making money online.
    
2. Lots of awesome resources and links.
    
3. A step by step guide on all aspects of web marketing from basics (setting up a blog) to advanced ways to get traffic and such.
    
4. Though I haven't yet utilized the forum yet, I read from others who have that she is very active in helping people who have questions.

Cons:

Not much. The only thing that stood out (and thats because I like convenience) is that the PDF chapter titles in the Table of Content don't have links.

------------------------
  
As I mentioned before this isn't the ultimate list of pros and cons by any means. Just my 2 cents on these books. I hope that helps you to figure out which programs would work best for you.

The Laws of Attraction by
Steve Pavlina - stevepavlina.com

The Law of Attraction simply says that you attract into your life whatever you think about.  Your dominant thoughts will find a way to manifest.  But the Law of Attraction gives rise to some tough questions that don't seem to have good answers.  I would say, however, that these problems aren't caused by the Law of Attraction itself but rather by the Law of Attraction as applied to objective reality.

Here are some of those problematic questions (all are generalizations of ones I received via email):

• What happens when people put out conflicting intentions, like two people intending to get the same promotion when only one position is available?
• Do children, babies, and/or animals put out intentions?
• If a child is abused, does that mean the child intended it in some way?
• If I intend for my relationship to improve, but my spouse doesn't seem to care, what will happen?

These questions seem to weaken the plausibility of the Law of Attraction.  Sometimes people answer them by going pretty far out.  For example, it's been said by LoAers that a young child experiences abuse because s/he intended it or earned it during a past life.  Well, sure… we can explain just about anything if we bring past lives into the equation, but IMO that's a cop-out.  On the other hand, objective reality without the Law of Attraction doesn't provide satisfactory answers either — supposedly some kids are just born unlucky.  That's a cop-out too.

I've never been satisfied by others' answers to these questions, and they're pretty important questions if the Law of Attraction is to be believed.  Some books hint at the solution but never really nail it.  That nail, however, can be found in the concept of subjective reality.

Subjective reality is a belief system in which (1) there is only one consciousness, (2) you are that singular consciousness, and (3) everything and everyone in your reality is a projection of your thoughts.

You may not see it yet, but subjective reality neatly answers all these tricky Law of Attraction questions.  Let me 'splain….

In subjective reality there's only one consciousness, and it's yours.  Consequently, there's only one source of intentions in your universe — YOU.  While you may observe lots of walking, talking bodies in your reality, they all exist inside your consciousness.  You know this is how your dreams work, but you haven't yet realized your waking reality is just another type of dream.  It only seems solid because you believe (intend) it is.

Since none of the other characters you encounter are conscious in a way that's separate from you, nobody else can have intentions.  The only intentions are yours.  You're the only thinker in this universe.

It's important to correctly define the YOU in subjective reality.  YOU are not your physical body.  This is not the egoic you at all.  I'm not suggesting you're a conscious body walking around in a world full of unconscious automatons.  That would be a total misunderstanding of subjective reality.  The correct viewpoint is that you're the single consciousness in which this entire reality takes place.

Imagine you're having a dream.  In that dream what exactly are YOU?  Are YOU the physical dream character you identify with?  No, of course not — that's just your dream avatar.  YOU are the dreamer.  The entire dream occurs within your consciousness.  All dream characters are projections of your dream thoughts, including your avatar.  In fact, if you learn lucid dreaming, you can even switch avatars in your dream by possessing another character.  In a lucid dream, you can do anything you believe you can.

Physical reality works the same way.  This is a denser universe than what you experience in your sleeping dreams, so changes occur a bit more gradually here.  But this reality still conforms to your thoughts just like a sleeping dream.  YOU are the dreamer in which all of this is taking place.

The idea that other people have intentions is an illusion because other people are just projections.  Of course, if you strongly believe other people have intentions, then that's the dream you'll create for yourself.  But ultimately it's still an illusion.

Here's how subjective reality answers these challenging Law of Attraction questions:

What happens when people put out conflicting intentions, like two people intending to get the same promotion when only one position is available?

Since you're the only intender, this is entirely an internal conflict — within YOU.  You're holding the thought (the intention) for both people to want the same position.  But you're also thinking (intending) that only one can get it.  So you're intending competition.  This whole situation is your creation.  You believe in competition, so that's what you manifest.  Maybe you have some beliefs (thoughts and intentions) about who will get the promotion, in which case your expectations will manifest.  But you may have a higher order belief that life is random, unfair, uncertain, etc., so in that case you may manifest a surprise because that's what you're intending.

Being the only intender in your reality places a huge responsibility on your shoulders.  You can give up control of your reality by thinking (intending) randomness and uncertainty, but you can never give up responsibility.  You're the sole creator in this universe.  If you think about war, poverty, disease, etc., that's exactly what you'll manifest.  If you think about peace, love, and joy, you'll manifest that too.  Your reality is exactly what you think it is.  Whenever you think about anything, you summon its manifestation.

Do children, babies, and/or animals put out intentions?

No.  Your own body doesn't even put out intentions — only your consciousness does.  You're the only one who has intentions, so what takes precedence is what YOU intend for the children, babies, and animals in your reality.  Every thought is an intention, so however you think about the other beings in your reality is what you'll eventually manifest for them.  Keep in mind that beliefs are hierarchical, so if you have a high order belief that reality is random and unpredictable and out of your control, then that intention will trump other intentions of which you're less certain.  It's your entire collection of thoughts that dictates how your reality manifests.

If a child is abused, does that mean the child intended it in some way?

No.  It means YOU intended it.  You intend child abuse to manifest simply by thinking about it.  The more you think about child abuse (or any other subject), the more you'll see it expand in your reality.  Whatever you think about expands, and not just in the narrow space of your avatar but in all of physical reality.

If I intend for my relationship to improve, but my spouse doesn't seem to care, what will happen?

This is another example of intending conflict.  You're projecting one intention for your avatar and one for your spouse, so the actual unified intention is that of conflict.  Hence the result you experience, subject to the influence of your higher order beliefs, will be to experience conflict with your spouse.  If your thoughts are conflicted, your reality is conflicted.

This is why assuming responsibility for your thoughts is so important.  If you want to see peace in the world, then intend peace for EVERYTHING in your reality.  If you want to see abundance in the world, then intend it for EVERYONE.  If you want to enjoy loving relationships, then intend loving relationships for ALL.  If you intend these only for your own avatar but not for others, then you're intending conflict, division, and separation; consequently, that's what you'll experience.

If you stop thinking about something entirely, does that mean it disappears?  Yes, technically it does.  But in practice it's next to impossible to uncreate what you've already manifested.  You'll continue creating the same problems just by noticing them.  But when you assume 100% responsibility for everything you're experiencing in your reality right now — absolutely everything — then you assume the power to alter your reality by rechanneling your thoughts.

This entire reality is your creation.  Feel good about that.  Feel grateful for the richness of your world.  And then begin creating the reality you truly want by making decisions and holding intentions.  Think about what you desire, and withdraw your thoughts from what you don't want.  The most natural, easiest way to do this is to pay attention to your emotions.  Thinking about your desires feels good, and thinking about what you don't want makes you feel bad.  When you notice yourself feeling bad, you've caught yourself thinking about something you don't want.  Turn your focus back towards what you do want, and your emotional state will improve rapidly.  As you do this repeatedly, you'll begin to see your physical reality shift too, first in subtle ways and then in bigger leaps.

I too am just a manifestation of your consciousness.  I play the role you expect me to play.  If you expect me to be a helpful guide, I will be.  If you expect me to be profound and insightful, I will be.  If you expect me to be confused or deluded, I will be.  But of course there's no distinct ME that is separate from YOU.  I'm just one of your many creations.  I am what you intend me to be.  But deep down you already knew that, didn't you?

I heard this poem read on Def Poetry Jam and felt like I can relate to the author... though I must admit that its a bit crazy and you'll see what i mean soon...

------------------

Emotional Idiot by Maggie Estep

I'm an Emotional Idiot
  so get away from me.
  I mean, COME HERE. 

Wait, no,
  that's too close,
  give me some space
  it's a big country,
  there's plenty of room,
  don't sit so close to me.

Hey, where are you?
  I haven't seen you in days.
  Whadya, having an affair?
  Who is she?
  Come on,
  aren't I enough for you?

God,
  You're so cold.
  I never know what you're thinking.
  You're not very affectionate.

I mean,
  you're clinging to me,
  DON'T TOUCH ME,
  what am I, your f*****g cat?
  Don't rub me like that.

Don't you have anything better to do
  than sit there fawning over me?

Don't you have any interests?
  Hobbies?
  Sailing Fly fishing
  Archeology?

There's an archeology expedition leaving tomorrow
  why don't you go?
  I'll loan you the money,
  my money is your money.
  my life is your life
  my soul is yours
  without you I'm nothing.

Move in with me
  we'll get a studio apartment together, save on rent,
  well, wait, I mean, a one bedroom,
  so we don't get in each other's hair or anything
  or, well,
  maybe a two bedroom
  I'll have my own bedroom,
  it's nothing personal
  I just need to be alone sometimes,
  you do understand,
  don't you?

Hey, why are you acting distant?

Where you goin',
  was it something I said?
  What
  What did I do?

I'm an emotional idiot
  so get away from me
  I mean,
  MARRY ME.

**Updated 9/22/06**

Yeah, it's been a few weeks since I've added any new info, but better later then never right? Well, I've been hard at work and finally have my online portfolio up and running again. Here's the URL:

http://portfolio.natashasworld.com/

**Updated 12/19/06**

Hi all. If all goes as planned, I'll be posting Issue 3 of ASpiRE! Magazine by tomorrow. Since I just started a new job, Issue 3 will be the last issue I design for ASpiRe! Modeling Agency in SL. But the good news is the very talented Digit Darkes will be taking over my position. If you would like to continue to download future issues of ASpiRE! magazine, be sure to visit aspiresl.com.

**Updated 12/4/06**

Here's Issue 2 of ASpiRE! Magazine:
ASpiRE! Magazine Issue 2 (6.72 MB) (added on 12/4/06)

I'm actually going to start working on Issue 3 soon, and will post it here when it's done. Let me know what you think. Till next time. :)

**Updated 11/11/06**

Hey all, I updated the video on my page and removed the long sound check at the beginning of the movie. If you haven't checked it out yet, be sure to do so. Till next time. :)

**Updated 10/13/06**

Hello again, I think I'm gonna end up having a blog outside of myspace. That way I'll have more control over the design and such. I'll post the link here when I do.

Anyhow, many of you probably don't know that I'm a citizen of a 3D environment called Second Life or SL for short. The best way to describe it is like SIMS Online Amplified. I wouldn't dare say its a game, because you create your experience as you go. There are no levels, and you can choose to be anything you've ever wanted to be in real life. Yeah, it's that serious.

Anyways, the reason I bring it up is because my SL character, Princess Pierterson, is in a modeling agency there and I have just finished designing a magazine for that agency. I've created a PDF version of the Magazine and am posting it here so ya'll can check it out:

ASpiRE! Magazine Issue 1 (9 MB)

It was definitely a challenge, because I ended up having to design it all in Photoshop, which is not a magazine layout software.... yeah *sigh*. As a result, here are some requirements for best viewing. You'll need the latest Adobe Reader or Acrobat. I've found that it doesn't display well in the OS X Preview.app and the OS X version of Firefox PDF Viewer. Hopefully that won't be the case with the next issue.

Be sure to let me know what you think. Till next time.:)

It's funny how one of the first things people like to write about themselves is how laid back and easy going they are.. but those who know them best are probably saying, "yeah right..." Well, I'll spare you all that and be straight up ... I can be a real Queen B. at times.

But overall, I think people who know me best will say that my heart is in the right place. I may not always be smiling or in the mood to entertain people, but if someone is in need and there's someway I can help, I'm there.

**Updated 8/28/06**

Ok, I'm in the typing mood and decided that I want to update this section. I'll be doing that occasionally with 1 or 2 facts at a time, so If you're really bored and want to learn something new about me, check back on this section. I'll also start adding to my blog page soon, so stay tuned.

Here's something about me that those who don't know me personally may not be aware of: I was born in Jersey, but my parents are Haitians. I've never been to Haiti, but can speak and read creole pretty well. I'm also not too shabby when it comes to cooking up some Haitian food.

Well that's it for now. I'll add more at a later time. If there's something you want to know, ask. I can't guarantee that I'll give you an answer, but I can assure you that I'll be very polite about it. ;)

Just a couple of weeks ago, there was a guy not too far from my area, going around breaking into people's homes and raping women in the middle of the night. It was a scarey time for many. I even decided enough is enough and sent for my application kit to get a licence to carry a concealed weapon. I've done some Kung Fu, but am not niave enough to believe that martial arts could protect me if a gun were pointed to my head.

So in the midst of my planning how to better protect myself, I stumbled upon the following post that made me rethink everything. Though I still believe all people, especially women,  should learn how to handle themselves in a sticky situation, I also believe that we have to take responsibility for our actions and hold each other accountable.

Check out the following post, and let me know what you think:

Only Rapists Can Prevent Rape

A lot has been said about how to prevent rape. Women should learn self-defense. Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark. Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts. Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. Hell, they shouldn't dare to get drunk at all. Instead of that bull****, how about:

If a woman is drunk, don't rape her.

If a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her.

If a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her.

If a woman is jogging in a park at 5 am, don't rape her.

If a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her.

If a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her.

If a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her.

If a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her.

If a woman is in a coma, don't rape her.

If a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her.

If a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her.

If a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her.

If your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her.

If your step-daughter is watching TV, don't rape her.

If you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her.

If your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend.

If your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.

If your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and tell the guy he's a rapist.

Tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, sons of friends it's not okay to rape someone.

Don't tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.

Don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x.

Don't imply that it's in any way her fault.

Don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl.

Don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions.

You can, too, help yourself.

If you agree, re-post it. It's that important.

Note: This goes for any gendered rape, male on female or female on male or female on female or FTM on MTF or non gendered to dual gendered and so on and so forth....

-author unknown

I know I said that I would start a seperate blog, but this girl here is feelin a lil' lazy and don't want to design a new blog site yet. I guess I'm feeling burned out from working hard on design stuff and seeing myself not moving forward-- feeling stuck.

Being a designer is hard, because we don't truly get compensated for our time and hard work. The truth is, we never really stop working, even after we "clock out." Or at lease I know I never do. I'm constantly in my mind going over little details that no one else may ever notice, but that make a big difference. And sadly, it's a thanksless job, because non-designers tend to treat us like our work is easy and try to tack on more work by being indecisive about what they want.

The last project I worked on was a magazine. Throughout the whole process, I posted the layouts online for the client to see. Then, right before the magazine is to be published, they realized that they needed to do more editing on the content and I had to go back and replace the text on every article spread. So yeah, I love the designing, but I'm not sure I have the patience or desire to deal with all the crap that comes along with this line of work. :/