Negative thoughts
drop by uninvited
though I kicked them out long ago.
Party's over guys...
time to go.
"You know where we are
when you need us" they say.

Sometimes they make a good case:
"Work sucks - it's boring, mean and they just don't care."
"We're tired of the money game aren't you?"
"Good boy! Always doing what you're told."
"Can't drink it away; what's the point?"
"Waiting for the alien harvest
or the apocalypse? - Might as well wear shades."

They check in on me often,
usually their visits
are short.
Like sales calls:
door to door.
I tell them thanks
but I'm not interested.

I realized yesterday
they had moved back in
It happened without me realizing,
now they're kicking out my friends;
renovating, redecorating and dismantling
everything that is mine.
It feels too late. Fine, It's over. Just let me sleep.

A voice of reason reminds me
I can practice the art of no.
I must no longer entertain them; disengage.
Discontinue recognition of their artificial authority
This new foundation I operate from is solid.
Attention is powerful.
My intention is real.

Words
seem so insignificant,
at times,
yet so powerful
in other cases.
When to say;
what to speak;
how to write.
These thoughts
so fleeting yet so powerful.

Why can't I express
more gracefully
the intensity of being
in my current state
of existence?
Why must I hold back?
Why must I spew forth?
Constant conflict within-
deafening internal dialog.
Stop!
Let me be
free.
Unconcerned with outcome.
Trust. Trusting. Trustworthy.

Allowing the eternal grin
to beam forth
and flow through
is quite possibly
the greatest challenge
with the ultimate reward.
This is my burden.
May I accept
and rise to the challenge.
Forever.

.....*::*:::^:::*::*.....

The warmth of your smile,
so inviting.
It says more than words,
speaking in genuine
yet subtle abstractions
of principles and concepts
I barely dreamt possible.
No longer a wish...
now reality.
A fact.
The present.
Your presence
becomes fuel.
Forty years
and the days peel off quickly.
Time seems more precious
and intent has my attention.
How shall I be
when life has new meaning?
Old ideas and long dead motives
slip away
exposing possibility.
What I thought
had been giving up
was simply
a Cocoon
now shed.

.....*::*:::^:::*::*.....

{...~^~...}

Welcome to the waking world
my lovely artist.
Awaken and prepare;
for today you may bring joy
to all those whom you meet.
Accept your fate
not as a burden
not as a task to be endured
but as the product
and the source
which nourishes
one and all.
This my friend
is the forgotten secret
which must be rediscovered daily.
It is never too late...

Fuckin' -A!

{...~^~...}

It seems that there are quite a lot of folks out there in the world who like to hide behind their phones and their titles and use the customer / service relationship as an opportunity to take out, display and put to use their various cruel, demanding and otherwise crummy traits on folks who are paid to take it (supposedly). The only possible thought processes that could occur to these folks are: A.) This person is here for me to abuse and they have to take it; or B.) NO THOUGHT - these people are simply NOT thinking and are allowing their more base emotions to take over. After careful reflection, I would like to offer this simple suggestion to anyone reading this, for we all have been guilty in one way or another of the crime of assholism: BE KIND! Unless someone, some specific person has done something to intentionally harm you or stand in the way of your freedom or happiness, angry, rude behavior is intolerable and uncalled for. THIS WILL NOT RESULT IN YOUR GETTING WHAT YOU WANT!. As a general rule, no one enjoys or appreciates being treated poorly and the natural human reaction to this is to respond in an unkind fashion. CONSIDER YOURSELVES WARNED. Whether overtly or covertly, unkind and ugly actions beget unkind and ugly responses. Comments such as "I guess you’ve got to be a fairy to get service here" to your waiter or "Well, FINALLY... I’ve been on hold for 15 minutes. I hope your shuttle is more prompt than your phone service" to your reservationist are not the most effective ways to handle customer frustration. These common customer mistakes can often backfire and result in experiences which are far less satisfying that the initial discomfort.

What causes someone to react this way? I think it stems from fear, powerlessness or a sense of entitlement.

Abusive ranting at a clerk, csr, delivery person, installer, cashier, waiter, salesperson, secretary, concierge, etc. should always result in discontinuation of service to that individual, or at the very least an enforced time out. If a child were to behave in this way this is exactly what wold happen, why should we expect any less from adults? We are all responsible for our own actions and should expect reaping the rewards of the results of our behavior. I often wonder what a person is thinking or expecting when they insult, demean or demoralize someone performing a service for them. There is dignity in all work. ALL WORK and as humans we should expect to be treated accordingly. If we choose to engage others in combative and destructive ways, we should be prepared to accept the fact that we will likely be met with actual rudeness, disgust, stonewalling or perhaps we will simply be ignored. Within reason, adults should expect to treat other adults as adults.

These days, what was once simply deemed politeness, respect, common sense and common courtesy could at times be construed as CLASS WAR. I guess that’s what I’m proposing people. Kill ’em with kindness. A modern class war, and this time it’s gonna be pretty.

There was something I desperately wanted to put down here earlier today, but due to work restrictions, couldn’t (shit, I didn’t even have time to write it down). I know, I know, if it’s truly profound or needs posting, I’ll remember it.

I get lost. Time stands still.

Back to the books.

I find myself here, late at night, with an overwhelming compulsion to listen to Yellow Submarine. Though it’s a bit strange, there’s something so profoundly right and life affirming about that, that I’m not even questioning it. I’m just listening and following direction. It’s like that a lot these days....

Is this thing even on?

So, I took this survey, and all I got was this lousy result. It does, however remind me that I kind of want to do something with my hair, and though a pinhead doo is a bit extreme, I am desirous of a change of sorts. Black dye? Layering? I have entertained the idea of a mohawk, but most of these ideas are just fantasy. I'll just chill and the mood will pass. Black and antifreeze green would be bitchin'. This could be followed by red, black and blue after the green faded. That's what I would do today if I could or rather if I had the time, money and lack of concern about the consequences.




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