Who knew???

So I aksed Tom about the whole Mango thing and he said I was a moron.  Then he told me "we've known each other for years" but I "just don't listen". So I guess he's a genius or something?!!???! and he graduated from high school early and from college early and invented computer monitors or the internet or something like that and then he sold his invention and then he retired and he was still only 20.

He said all the work mad ehim really tired so that's why he just watches TV and plays video games and surfs the internet now.

So that story wasn't nearly as exciteing as I was hoping.  I was hoping there would be something about blackmail or ninjas or something.  But there wasn't and it made me really bored so I stopped listeneing.

Oh, and Tom says his IQ is twice what mine is. Is that bad or good????  I hope good for me.

Word to your momma!!

Kevin "The Professor" DuBrow

Well, guyz, I decided against the Grillz.  Even though I think they're really awesome, it wouldn't be rite for me to wear them... I mean, I'm not a rapper anymore... but if I strat again, I'll definitely get like two or three sets of grillz!!!!

So I jsut got sweet raise at Ultra-Mart where I work!!  I'm getting 10 cents more an hour because I "show up for work"!!!! lol!!!  Pretty soon I'l be makiing over $7 every hour!!!

So I'm thinking about maybee getting a car some time. I could get some really cool spinning rimms.  That'd be awesome.

Or I could starting to pay the rent.  I don't wahy Toms always beothering me about "paying my fiar share".  He's like realy wealthy I think.  I've never seen him work but he always has money.  Myabe like his family is really super rich!!!  Maybe they named the fruit mango after Tom Mango's family!!!!!  Waow!!! that'd be really sweet.  I should aslk him.

Well... I gotta disapear!!! I made a cake for Gretchen out of some Little Debbies covered in frosting.  I'm going to surprise her cuz I forgotg about Valentine's Day a couple days ago and I don't want her to break up with me or stop talking to me again.


PEAcE OUT!!!!!!!

TTYL!!!!


K-DUB 4-EVER!!!!

Yo Yo Yo!!!!1!!!!!!

Hey dudes- quick quesiton-


Shjould I get some sweet grillz???

I'm thikning about it but Gretchen says she wouldn't kiss me anymore and Tom says he wouldn't stofp kicking me in the face.

Thoughts?????

Hey homeflies-

Sorry I hasn''t been updating the ol' b-to the-log lately.  Ever since I wrote that mad awesome rapp for GRetchen she's been wanting to spend every waiking hour with me cuz  "she's finally realized how special I am."  It's driving me a nuts!!!!  And she keeps asking me to write her more raps!!!!  I'm only one man!!!!!

So I'm retiring form rapping just like Jay-Z did.  I'm done with it for ever just like him.  Oh, wait, Tom just said that Jay-Z came out with another album after that.  Hmmm... well, then I'm done just like Tupac is.

This is my retirement notice!!!!1!!
The great K-DuB will rap no more.  (but you guys can still call me K-DuB- it's really fly).

HERE LIES K-DuB's RAPPING CAREER

             (2006-2007)

            RIP

Even tho I'm still really excited and happy about me nad Gretchen being back together, I have a serous thing to say here.

To all the guys out there an especialy to the REAL K-FED if you'er reading this-

If you made you're lady mad at you and she left you or just isn't talking to you anymore, THERE IS ONLy ONE WAY TO GET HER BACK!!!!

That way is a ROMANTICAL RAP!!!!  It worked for me and I thihk it can probably work for you too!!!!

It's a simple law of nature:  GIRLS LUV RAP.

Don't worry- this advice is compeltey free for me to all of you (espcially K-Fed. I know you can win back Britney!!!! Just do what you do BEST- rap!!1!! lol)

KEvin "Relationship Counseller" DuBrow

Guys this is a REALLLY BIG DAY!!!!!

Gretchen was completely won oever by my rap in the my last entry and we'er back together and REALLY HAPPY agaihn!!!!!!!!

I'm so :) !!!!!  (that's a smiley face!!!)

YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH BBBBAAAAAAAABBBBBBBBYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

I think I've got it now!!! For reall!!!!  I know how to win GRetchen back and make her not mad at me anymore!!!

Anuither totally sweet rap but about HER this time!!!

Gretchen's her name and she really fine
She's so hot they won't let her stand in lines
She's got a pretty face and a nice behind
But back off jerks cuz she's all mine!

So, Gretchen, please don't be mad at me anymore please.  I don't like it and neither does Tom cuz I complain to him all the time and he's "sick of listening to me talk".  You're really pretty and good at sewing the button's bakc on my shirts.

Let's start the new year together again please!!!!!

YOU can be my Xtina, okay????

K-DuB

This entry is a response to the last one.  It's writen cuz Tom said he'd kick me out of the apratment if I didn't and think he really mean's this time.

1- I meant QUANDRY in the last one.  Not QUARRY.

2- Tom sa;ys that K-Fed is not and never was fly.  I still dn't believe him but his opinion is his own and valid.

3- I'm sorry for steeling Tom's Hungry Man dinners all the time.  He's a hungrier man than me.

4- There's no such thing as a depresso-sack.

5- Staind's lyrics are NOT insightful.

6- Tom never told me to shut my "pie hole".  He told me to shut my "ugly face".

7- One of these days I really will get a dictionary and start spelli-checking thihgs.  But I just can't afford one right now.

There, Tom.  I hope you're happy.  Making a man down on his luck go even further in the hole.....

Kevin "Lowerdown" DuB

Sos I was talknig to TOM AGAIN about how I'm so sad and Gretchen needs to come back to me and how K-Fed would have never let this happen but then Tom surprised me and said that "I should shut my stupid pie hole" and that "Britney dumped Kevin Federline a couple months ago!"

I was shocked.  Just shocked.  I couldn't believe it.

If a fly guy like K-Fed lost his lady, how am I suposed to get mine back????

I am in a definite quarry.  Definte QUARRY.

Without Gretchen, I guess I have to steal another one of Tom's Hungry Man dinners again tonight.

I'm sad. Gretchen used to steal those Hungry Man dinners for me.

I'm ben listening to a lot of Staind lately. Their lyrics are areally inciteful and it speaks to me a lot.

I'm sadder than a depresso-sack!

What's guy to do?????/??

Kevin "Lowdown" DuBrow

Yo, hombres- the world is still not looking good for K-Dub.....

Gretchen's still not talking to me and it's got me really down.  I meann I really like her and maybe I should=n't have said I want to marry Xtina.  Gretchen's really hot too.  I mean really she is.  She should be a model or something.  Sometimes I just sit and stare at her while sh'es doing little things like folding my laundry or meaking me a big chickin dinner. You know what, I don't even care that she's not famous.  I mean she'll bprobably win the next American Idol or something anyway.

So I'm trying to think of a good way to win her back.. I can't stand this lonliness anymore.  It's been almost two weeks!

Tom's a cool guys adn eevry thing but the just doesn't cut it, yuo know?

So if you have any suggestions, just leave a comment and let me know.

Kevin "King of Pain" DuBrow

Well, homedogs, life has taken a definit downturn since my last entry.  My girlfriend Gretchen read the part where I talked about getting myself a famous hot lady like Christina and now she's made at me for some reason.  I don't really understand why, I mean, I'm not dating Christina now or anything.  That's for later.

But anyway- to all the dudes out there- don't let your girlfriend find out that you want to date a really hot famous chick more than you want to date her cuz she'll be so MAD!!!

Girls are so confusing-

Kevin "The Apologiser" DuBrow

Did you dudes know that Kevin Federline (or K-Fed as the coolc kids call him) is married to Britney Spears!!  She's really hot!!!!  Man, K-Fed is LUCKY!  He gets to be married to Britney and he's really good at rapping too!!  I bet that's how she fell for him. lol. Cuz of his rappying.

Well, I'm gonna be a rapper too and win myself a famouse hot lady too. lol. Like Christina, maybe. lol.

So start calling me K-DuB, first of all (I have the right first name for this job!). and now read my new rap.

I'm the best rapper you ever did see
From up in the sky to down in the sea
I think up hot rhymes like one, two, three
Full of melo-die and harmon-ees

K-DuB's the name and keep it straight
I'm always on time, won't never be late
If you wanna be a rapper, let me demonstrate
You can eat my words with a fork on a plate

If I was food I'd be a steak
Not a chewy one, don't make no mistake
Doesn't even matter how much money I make
I got ladies like a baker's got cake

So what do you gyus think, huh?  Pretty dope, right!!

Tom says it sucks but he doesn't know what he's talking about.  He doesn't understnad music.

Peace out, bros and sises!!  TTYL!@!

K-DuB