Good Day Fans/Relatives

I have recently unearthed I a track that I have no memory of forgetting. I have named it after a dog who had tits.
I have called it "The Dog Who Had Tits"

Christina Aguilera was in the neighbouring studio recording a charity album when she heard my track and decided that it was a better way to spend her time. She recorded a vocal part which is slightly off key.


I would like to congratulate Barack Obama on his recent success in the olympics. I wish him luck in the Zimbabwean elections in November.
He's got my vote!

I would like to apologise to my dearest fans for my lack of activity recently. I have been attempting to switch over to freeview. It hasn't been easy. Or fun.


Good bye.


Goulet.


I would also like to express my deepest regret at hearing of my friend Gary Glitter's recent ordeals in the media. I sincerely believe that he is innocent of a victimless crime.

Dirty paedo.

I am Goulet.

And you are not.

I recently created a new song entitled 'Fluff'.

It is a revolution in music and has thus created an entirely new genre of music that I like to call Bathrobe.

I have recently visited Brighton, and I experienced what I believe to have been a sexual encounter.

I was on the pier when I encountered an ice cream vendor. I then attemped to purchase an ice cream with beans I had acquired in Venezuela whilst in pursuit of Enya.

It began to rain.

I fled the scene out of fear and insecurity.

Best weekend I've ever had.

Your Goulet.

Goulet.

Goulet. Goulet. Goulet.

I have a new sound. With it I plan to conquer the human race.

The new sound will appear to you a bit like this: