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Skorp



Last Updated: 11/18/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 33
Sign: Scorpio

City: PHOENIX
State: ARIZONA
Country: US
Signup Date: 3/30/2005

Blog Archive
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Wednesday, June 03, 2009 

Category: Blogging
I'm Bringing Skorpy Back!


I've been away and it's all work's fault.

But they fucking fired me today. So like the ol' girl you used to bang but stopped calling because you got too busy, consider this your booty call.

I got nothing else to do.

First off, is there anyone left?

Is there anyone who is even interested in getting "Skorped" anymore?

Let me know in the comments because if you all left then I'm speaking to no one and that's kind of sad and a little pathetic on my part.

But seriously, I have all the time in the world right now and I need some humor.

Let's get back to business. (The business of making funny pictures of you guys!)
9:26 PM 
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Thursday, February 19, 2009 

Category: Blogging

I am not a fan of Myspace anymore.

I constantly get errors when posting blogs, the format is not as user friendly as other sites out there and it's just an all around hassle.

I have been blogging on other sites like Wordpress, Tumblr, Blogger, etc and I just like them so much more than anything Myspace offers.

The only reason I haven't closed up shop here is because of all of you. I want to do some more contests and this still works well enough for that but as far as my regular blogging, you can find me pretty much everywhere else.

In fact, my Tumblr is quickly becoming my favorite new place and it is also a good jumping on point for any of the other social media stuff I do.

So technically, I'm not leaving Myspace but if you get a craving for anything Skorp-related, there are plenty of other places to find me and I'll update those places here soon.



7:06 PM 
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Monday, January 12, 2009 

Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
WOW. Check out this video I made! WOOOO...





Okay, maybe this isn't the kind of video you were expecting from me but I gotta make a living too ya know. I probably should have told you that you didn't actually have to sit through the whole thing either. My bad.

And no, there isn't any sound because legal won't approve the use of "Final Destination" by Europe.

So I was thinking it would be very helpful if everyone/anyone would favorite it and rate the video on YouTube? Perhaps even a comment.

I CAN say that what my job offers is totally professional and actually a big help to many, but then they did hire me so take that into consideration if you're having issues about giving this any kind of high rating.

The sequel should be way better.
8:23 PM 
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Thursday, December 11, 2008 

Category: Life
I promise you guys I'm not using you for my own evil purposes.

A few of you came through for me last time when I asked for some "work help" and I don't forget that.

In fact, if any of you need something similar from me, don't hesitate to ask!

With that said...I need your help again but this time it's as simple as clicking a button.

Here is the link - KillerStartups

All I need ya to do is click the Vote button.

Easy right?

So as to that possible reward mentioned above...

I am dying to get some photoshop time in. I miss doing it and I feel like I need to take a break from all these silly work-related posts and get back to what made Myspace fun. So those of you who have stuck with me during this break are the ones who I really want to have some fun with.

Those of you who bailed...now is your chance to remind me who you are.

So expect some "Skorping" going on very soon.
10:01 AM 
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Tuesday, September 09, 2008 

Category: Romance and Relationships

I couldn't let important information like this go by unnoticed. Stuff about sexually-transmitted diseases and touching no-no parts is something that everyone should be well informed of.

Planned Parenthood is trying to be hip and cool by funny videos which are secretly giving you information and making you laugh at the same time.

The truth is, these videos are so terribly bad that it's the lameness that makes them funny.

My personal favorites are "Horse Penis Virus" and the "Down There Song".

I couldn't post the videos but they are ready to watch at this link:

- TakeCareDownThere.com

Here is a sample of what you can expect...

I feel like this Planned Parenthood is way better than the knowledge I learned from my neighbor, Larry, back when I was a kid.

You really can't impregnate a girl simply by touching her nipples through her shirt.

I hope you learn alot.

 

 

7:04 AM 
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Tuesday, July 29, 2008 

Category: Life
With everything that's been going on in my word lately it's been really easy to see all the little things that I take for granted.

Since everything is going wrong, even the smallest thing can seem like the BEST NEWS EVER!

Like finding out that the vending machines at work are now carrying Jack Links Beef Jerkey.



Or that I didn't waste my money by going to see Step Brothers this weekend after reading the reviews and hearing from my friends how brutally awful it was.



Watching the sneak peak of the new X-men Origins: Wolverine Trailer which you should be able to see HERE!

And of course...it's fucking SHARK WEEK!



What little things are making you happy right now?


10:42 PM 
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Tuesday, July 22, 2008 

Category: Pets and Animals
Here's the situation.

You have a dog that you've had for years, you love like your child and that dog gets sick.

You take it to an emergency clinic and find out that it has Pancreaitis and is going into a diabetic coma.

Over the course of a week the medical fees climb to over $5000.00 and there is still little hope.

Then they send your dog home and it seems even worse than when you left it.

Fur discolored from urine stains, bones showing through skin and an eye that looks like it could fall out at any moment.

The dog is permanently on special (expensive) food for the rest of its life and will also require two shots a day.

She's only six years old.

Does this sound like we didn't get what we paid for?
When is it time to say goodbye?
When would you have given up?
Would you ever get another pet?
4:49 PM 
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Tuesday, July 15, 2008 

Category: Life
First off, I sincerely want to thank everyone for all the kind words they wrote in the blog I wrote called "I Love It When You Call Me Big Poppa".

You guys are always so great and supportive of everything I do but I wrote the blog too soon.

I am very sad to say that we've had some complications and the pregnancy did not continue.

These are hard times for Kelly and I and we're not looking for sympathy, just to move on and hopefully try again soon.

I thank you all for your thoughts in this time and we're pushing forward with what we've been dealt.

I'm sorry for the bummer of a blog but I just think it's the right thing to do because I really don't want another "Congratulations" reminding me of what could have been.

Thank you all and I'll be back when I have some better things to talk about.
5:33 AM 
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Monday, June 23, 2008 

Category: Religion and Philosophy
The Skorp Diet

Call it metabolism, call it luck, call it inhuman physiology but I have been 185lbs for 10+ years without ever following any specific dietary game plan.

So it occurred to me, maybe the stuff that I eat every day is actually a successful diet in itself.

For the past 7 days I have kept track of every piece of food and every drop of liquid I've consumed.

If you're brave enough, try the diet yourself...

Or at least try and survive it!

Monday:

1 32oz. Dr. Pepper
Couple handfuls of pizza-flavored Goldfish

2 Quesadillas w/hot sauce
1 Can of Orange Crush

1 Dozen microwaved Pizza Rolls
1 Bottle of Propel Kiwi Strawberry water

1/2 Bowl of 2 day old spaghetti

Tuesday:

1 32oz. Dr. Pepper
2 Cinnamon Poptarts

1 32oz. Coke
1 Sour Dough Jack -No Tomatoes
1 Medium Curly Fries

10-15 Assorted Jelly Belly jellybeans

1 Bowl of Hamburger Helper - Chili Cheese
1 Can of Mountain Dew

1 Can of Yoohoo Chocolate Drink

Wednesday:

1 32oz. Dr. Pepper
1 6-pack of Chocolate Donut Gems

1 20oz. Pepsi
1 Market Fresh Turkey Ranch Bacon sandwich
1 Medium Curly Fries

1 16oz. Orange Fanta

1 20oz. Dr. Pepper
2 McDonald Cheeseburgers
1 Medium Fries

1 Yoohoo Chocolate Drink

Thursday:

1 Redbull

1 32oz. Dr. Pepper
3 Regular Taco Bell Tacos

3 TGIF's Mozzarella Cheese Sticks
1 Bud Lite Lime

1 Totinos Pepperoni Pizza
1 Bud Lite Lime

1 Bottle of Water

Friday:

1 Redbull

1 32oz Dr. Pepper

1 Mushroom & Bacon Cheddar Burger
1 Basket of Garlic French Fries
1 Chocolate Malt

4 Bud Light Limes

1 Red Baron 3-Cheese Pizza

1 Raspberry Lemonade

Saturday:

1 Redbull
1 Chocolate Eclair Doughnut

1 32oz. Dr. Pepper
1 Footlong Subway Italian BMT

1 Can of Pepsi
4 Loaded Potato Bites

1 Yoohoo Chocolate Drink
2 Cinnamon Rolls

Sunday:

1 Can of Mountain Dew
2 KFC Snackers
1 Taco Bell Chicken Quesadilla

1 32oz. Coke

1 32oz. Root Beer

A Couple Handfuls of Cool Ranch Doritos

2 Bud Lite Limes

1 Plate of Homemade Swedish Meatballs
1 Bottle of Propel Grape water

1 Bowl of Cookies and Cream Ice Cream


WARNING: Skorp will not be held responsible for bloating, vomiting, shakiness, vision loss, heart failure, love handles, man boobs, liver damage, strokes, death, imaginary friends, esophogial implosion, growth of a second stomach, the sound of tubas when you walk, mooing, rectal tearing, sweating gravy, hangovers, harpoonings, cattle calls, fatty lady lumps, thigh hemmorages, turkey waddles, booty call offers from black guys, tsunami damage, and/or the Rapture.

8:06 PM 
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Wednesday, June 18, 2008 

Category: MySpace
I've noticed recently that one of the new features to Myspace is the ability to put your friends in custom categories.

I haven't gotten around to trying it yet but I have been amused to no ends by some of the categories I have been put in.

For some reason I'm in "BLOGGER" categories more than any even though I am hardly a Myspace blogger any more.

But other ones, whether they are serious or not, have really made me laugh lately.

Here are a list of all the categories I am currently in...

R-Teests
Plurk Pals
People Who Want To See Me Naked
People I Want To See Naked
Those I Don't Quite Know
Bands?
Good Time Kids
Met In Person
Want To Meet In Person
Guys Who Are Secretly In The Closet

Here are some Categories I think I should be in...

Guys I Would Sleep With Sober
Folks Who Can Really Pull Off A Sweet Mustache
People Who Probably Have Enormous Weiners
The One Person Super Jabs Won't Have Sex With
People That Are NOT My Boyfriend
Those I Have Stalked
Dudes With Awesome Sideburns
Guys Named Skorp Who Are Sexy, Yet Very Intelligent And Funny

These are just some suggestions in case you ever, like me, get around to making categories.

On Monday I've decided to post the "Skorp Diet". We'll see if you could take the challenge and survive.

Websites I think you should visit...

Manoverse.com

ShootTheStupid.com

Top10Kid.com

Also, my back is feeling a little better and thank you to everyone who sent their thoughts yesterday. I appreciated it.
9:04 PM 
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