I know I haven't been blogging much lately. Many of my other passion projects have taken me away from blogging, such as writing my next book, directing a few shorts and building a business. Oh, let me not forget, having a life. I've been working on trying to balance the other side of my life, and that' me. Eating healthy and working on a work-out regiment to get me back in shape. More on this later. But from here on out, I'm going to be blogging at least once a week, if not more.

My homegirl, Sofia Quintero reminded me that October was Domestic Violence Awareness Month and suggested I post a section from my yound adult book, THE SISTA HOOD: ON THE MIC [see myspace.com/thesistahood]. Per her suggestion and don't forget to peep her blog entry from PICTURE ME ROLLIN' [myspace.com/sofiaquintero] in support of Domestic Violence too.

The excerpt below deals with Liza, one of my fourteen year old characters in the SISTA HOOD: ON THE MIC who is in an abusive relationship with her boyfriend and her homegirls are trying to support her. My Second Book in the SISTA HOOD series will continue Liza's story and will also deal with Ezekiel who find himself in an abusive relationship with his girlfriend who is the manipulator in that relationship. Let me just say that Ezekial's story line was inspired by a young man in my life that is close to me and is going through a tough time with a girlfriend who just won't leave him alone.


Here it is, please excuse the formatting I can't seem to get that right on MY SPACE.

p. 181

"What happened, Liza?"
Liza looked around to see who was in the room as if she was protecting someone. "I'm only going to talk if the nurse leaves." But the nurse just stood there.
"I think we'll be fine here", Mrs. Matthews told the nurse, giving her a little wink. Once she was given the Matthew step-to-the-curb command, the nurse left us to deal with Liza alone.
"Okay, Liza what happened?" I asked.
Liza started crying, not even tripping over Mrs. Matthews being in the room. "I don't want you to hate me."
"I could never hate you, chica. You're my homegirl," I said.
"Rio and I had gone to Dolores Park to check out this dealer that supplies him with, you know…"

p. 182

"Drugs?"
"Yeah. Rio had gone a full twenty-four hours without getting high, he was bored out of his drug-free mind. So he decided to try the hard stuff."
"And what happened to you?"
"Well, whatever his hookup gave him was laced with some crazy stuff and Rio just flipped out and started dragging me with my face on the cement up Dolores Street."
"What a loser!"
"It wasn't his fault, Mari. He was on something. I really shouldn't have gotten him mad."
"Don't you get that no matter what you did or said you couldn't have stopped his trip?"
Tears just kept streaming down Liza's face and I knew any criticism of Rio at this moment was pointless. It was most important that Liza felt supported. I sat there just holding her and assuring her that everything would be fine.
"The cops wanted me to press charges and admit that he was on something, but I refused. You can't say anything."
Then Mrs. Matthews put in her two cents. "Well, I didn't promise, and that boy is gonna get his. And you, Liza, need to stay away from him. Once an addict, always an addict."
"Liza, we're all here. Whatever you need, we'll get through this together," I said.

p. 183

"I just want to see Rio. To tell him it will all be okay."
What'll be okay, Liza?" I asked.
"That we'll get through this together. All three of us."
It took me a while to realize that Liza was pregnant. That's what had probably set off Rio's frenzy. He can't take care of himself, let alone graduate from high school. How the hell is he going to take care of a child?
"Does the nurse know you're pregnant, Liza?" I asked.
"Yeah, they did a complete examination before you all got here."
Mrs. Matthews hollered for the nurse to come.
"Ms. Rappaport, you can come in now."
"You all promised," cried Liza.
"No Mariposa promised. I, on the other hand, mist make sure that you're cared for. We must contact your mother. Is she at work?"
"Yeah."
"Can you remember her number?"
"No."
"Then where's your cell phone, I'm sure the number is in there. Right?"
"You can't tell my mother!"
"Why, Liza?" I said.
Liza sat there shaking and crying more.
"Liza, why can't we tell your mother?" I demanded that she tell me the truth.
"Because my mother left us this summer. And my brothers are raising me. I'm still underage, is CPS finds out, they'll put me in foster care."
Then Liza just became very still and quiet.
I'm sorry, Mari. I'm really sorry."
Everything was finally crystal clear. This wasn't the first time that Rio had beaten Liza. The way things were going, it wouldn't be the last. That's why Liza would disappear for weeks at a time, missing school and not showing up when she was supposed to be meeting me. Liza was battered by that asshole Rio. It all makes so much sense now-his control over her, his possessiveness about her whereabouts, her depression. He probably knew about her mother and was holding that over her head too.
I started to feel like I let her down instead of the other way around. Here I was, all wrapped up in my Matthews love triangle. My parents' divorce, even my mom's drinking had never impacted me to the extent of what was happening to Liza.
All I could do was hug Liza. "No, Liza, I'm sorry that I wasn't a better friend. I should've known."
"But it's okay, 'cause Rio loves me. When everyone left me, he stayed," said Liza.
"We'll talk about it later, Liza. But Sadie's mother is right. You need to stay away from Rio for a while. He's sick, homie. He's real sick."

My company, Sister Outsider is looking for transgender writers,if interested see below:

Sister Outsider Entertainment is a multimedia production company that is developing JOTARIA, a multimedia theatre production exploring the diversity of Latina queer life. That said, we are issuing this call for monologues from transgender writers of color. Submissions must fit the following guidelines.


* The writer of the monologue must be a transgender woman of color (F to M and M to F), preferably Latina. You can be of any age and nationality, and you may be located anyplace in the United States. Monologues written in Spanish are welcomed.

* The protagonist of the monologue must be a Latina woman. We prefer that the character be transgender, but we are open.

* Given the concept of our show, the monologue must take place in a nightclub catering to LGBT women of color. If you have already written a monologue that originally takes place in another setting yet can easily be adjusted to occur in a nightclub, we will consider it.

* All submission must be the original work of the author. .You must own the copyright to the monologue as well as be able and willing to grant Sister Outsider Entertainment the right to produce it as part of JOTARIA.

* No experience is necessary, and we strongly encourage writers in other media (e.g. poets and essayists) to submit.

* This call is for writers only. If you are also an actor, please know that we cannot guarantee that you will be cast to perform the piece you have written. If you have any reservations whatsoever about having someone other than yourself perform your monologue, please do not submit.

* If your monologue is chosen for inclusion in JOTARIA, you must be willing to work with our dramaturg to rewrite your monologue to the satisfaction of Sister Outsider Entertainment. We truly believe that diversity can be achieved without sacrificing quality so if you have talent and discipline, we will work with you if you will work with us.

* All monologues must be no more than 4 double-spaced pages in 12 point font.

Please submit your monologue in RTF by October 1, 2007 by emailing it to sofia@sisteroutsider.biz . We will only contact those writers whose monologues we wish to include in JOTARIA.


Please spread this call far and wide!

Check out two of the Juicy Mango writers-- Sofia Quintero and Michelle Herrera Mulligan as they rep for JUUICY MANGOS on NPR.

When? Tuesday, August 14th at 10AM
Tune in to NPR 93.9 FM

Join us on August 15, when Elisha and Michelle will be featured as part of the hot In the Flesh series! Here are the details: From juicy mangos to sex on Fire Island and more, August's In The Flesh takes into the bedroom and beyond with steamy stories from some of New York's naughtiest (plus a visiting guest from Minneapolis).
Featuring John Blesso (Sharehouse Confidential), Perry Brass (Carnal
Sacraments), Catherine Lundoff (Crave), Elisha Miranda (The Sista
Hood), and Michelle Herrera Mulligan (Juicy Mangos). Hosted by erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel (He's on Top, She's on Top, Caught Looking).

Free candy and cupcakes will be served and authors books will be available for sale. IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES. 8 PM., AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC, (B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey,
http://www.happyendinglounge.com) Free admission
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

Anyone 18 and over is invited to the JUICY BOOK RELEASE PARTY on September 13, 2007. There will be staged book readings, goodie bags, great music, drinks and eats. And a surprise which has to deal with SEX TOYS! Make sure to send me a message with your email so you'll get your own personal evite!

When? Thursday, September 13, 2007 from 7-11PM

Where? Lavagina
116 Ave C (betw. 7th & 8th Sts) - New York NY 10009
212-477-9319

There will also be books for sale. And of course, the authors will be available to sign them!

Gente,

Check out the article below or online about Chica Luna in COLORLINES Magazine. It's wonderful! Chica Luna is also featured in the summe edition of Ms. Magazine in an article called From Harlem to Hollywood. Pick up your copy at bookstores today!

---------------------
COLORLINES: July/August 2007
online link to print article can be found at Check out the article at http://colorlines.com/article.php?ID=234

Mujeres Making Movies

By LaVon Rice

Two stray dogs in Vieques, Puerto Rico were responsible for the naming of Chica Luna Productions. There alone working on a documentary about the U.S. military occupation of Vieques, cofounder Elisha Miranda befriended and adopted the canine pair, which were named Chica and Luna. "Chica luna," or "girl moon," also sounded like a good name for the women of color artists' collective that she was launching with friends Sonia Gonzalez and Sofía Quintero. "I thought that would be a really interesting name," Miranda recalls. "We're women that howl at the moon." And how apt for "artivists" who use their voices to challenge stereotypical images of women of color.

But before Chica Luna Productions became a reality, it was a longing. Miranda was studying screenwriting and directing at Columbia University and feeling alone in her commitment to using popular media to advance social justice. "I found myself really alienated in film school and especially politically," remembers Miranda, a San Francisco native. "I was informed that film was a business, and I needed to make money—who cares about a queer Latina girl in the Mission?" But one evening she heard Quintero read from her screenplay, Interstates, and Miranda knew that she had found a kindred spirit. After the reading, Miranda went up to hug Quintero, and the next day they were on the phone for four hours, setting the stage for what would become Chica Luna. Both of them had extensive activist backgrounds, and thanks to what Miranda calls a "creative recovery in our late 20s," they sought to integrate their passion for social change with their identities as multimedia artists. They found yet another compañera in film editor, writer, and director Sonia Gonzalez, who is also the founder of Latinos for Positive Images, advocates for fair media representations of Latinos.

Chica Luna's signature program has become the F-Word, a multimedia justice project in New York City for 16-25-year-olds across the racial, sexual, economic, and linguistic spectrum. For five months, the young women learn about screenwriting, directing, producing, cinematography, editing, and working with actors, as well as media activism, including challenging one-dimensional depictions of their communities. They also write, direct, and edit their own short films, some of which are showcased at Chica Luna's annual short film festival.

The "f-word," of course, is feminism. Miranda, a 38-year-old Puerto Rican, recounts being told by a student: "I ain't a feminist—feminists are white women." Part of the F-Word's purpose is to re-imagine feminism by boosting media literacy skills and sisterhood among the participants. For example, instructors point out the internalized sexism dramatized when women compete for a man in a film. They also urge students to pay attention to who gets the most camera time and why, and to watch for caricatures like "the hot tamale Latina" and "the angry Black woman."

Another major program is Jotaria, which means "queerness" in Spanish. "We call it a hip-hop cabaret," says Miranda, "where we flip the script on a lot of stereotypes and misinformation about queer people." Sparked by the slaying of transgender teen Gwen Araujo in 2002, Jotaria is a multimedia theatre lab employing hip-hop, film, music, and the Internet to create interactive, community-building experiences. After opening in New York in October, the program will reach out to audiences across the country.

Visual art exhibits, artistic workshops, and an upcoming anthology are part of Chica Luna's endeavors, as well. The anthology came about, Miranda reports, because of a young woman who said that she didn't see a lot of writing that mirrored her experience as a Bronx-born Boricua . So a gathering of voices was convened in print to address such gaps in reflection and representation.

"It is still a bit of a challenge to complicate [some people's] thinking about what social change work can look like, especially in the area of media," Quintero notes. She says that such productions are extensions of her policy work. Before she became a full-time artist, Quintero, 37, was a policy analyst and advocate. Defending multicultural education and fighting police brutality were among the Dominicana- Puertoriqueña's varied crusades, which included grassroots activism in her leisure time. "Part of my policy work gave me some of the stories that I wanted to tell," she notes. "There had to be a way to use popular culture to get the everyday person to rethink what they take for granted."

Gonzalez, Quintero, and Miranda have done just that. The Puertoriqueña Gonzalez directed the comedy Debutante and has many film editing credits. Under nom de plume Black Artemis, Quintero has published Explicit Content, Picture Me Rollin', and Burn, a pioneering series of feminist hip-hop novels. In addition to the aforementioned Interstates, other screenplays of Quintero's include "M.L.B." (the "B" doesn't stand for "baseball"), which tells the story of an unruly woman who integrates the New York Yankees. And under the name of E-Fierce, Miranda has released The Sistahood: On the Mic, a novel about an all-female, multiracial hip-hop crew.

All three women have garnered distinctions for their work, but they are clear that the vision behind Chica Luna Productions is bigger than their individual projects and accomplishments. "We [wanted to] create this space for other women of color so that we're not the only women of color or the only queer women of color on the set," Miranda explains.

Confronting the marginalization of women of color in mainstream and independent media is also part of the purpose of Chica Luna's media justice curriculum. It's intended to help women of color in deconstructing images and implementing specific advocacy strategies within their own communities. One such workshop was a "Hustle and Flow Remix" in which the film was edited so that all of the scenes of each couple were shown consecutively. "What becomes very obvious when you see the film remixed that way is how much Hustle and Flow is basically Cinderella in blackface," reflects Quintero. "Women don't have dreams, and women don't have to have dreams as long as they attach themselves to men that have dreams."

For all of the emphasis on improving social conditions through art, how does one avoid being merely polemical?

"My first drafts of everything are always very didactic," laughs Quintero. But she challenges the widely held belief that a creative work "can't be about something and also be tight." Quintero continues, "We believe that you can make a film that is aesthetically pleasing, professionally crafted, socially viable, and commercially successful." She adds, "One way to know that you can work on your craft and not lose your message is by staying engaged in the struggle." Establishing a community-based studio in El Barrio, New York underlines Chica Luna's mission to stay engaged and remain relevant. "We had a choice to go to midtown for free, and we're like, 'no, our commitment is to being in the community,'" says Miranda. "A lot of times artists become so far removed from their community—you get a little access, you move away." And staying in the community makes accountability more likely. "We get checked, too," she adds.

In terms of building a community of collaboration, the founders—now board members—practice what they preach. Together, Miranda, Quintero, and Gonzalez created an award-winning short, Corporate Dawgs. Miranda and Quintero started Sister Outsider Entertainment in the spirit of solidarity and mentorship, as well. The urban media company was established "because we realized that we created Chica Luna, but then what do these young women plug into? It's hard to find jobs." Quintero says that their initiatives defy conventional wisdom about "keepin' it real and if what is 'real' has to be that way." She explains, "It requires some new thinking about how to do business. They want women like us to compete with each other. So when Elisha gets her film made, I can forget about getting my film made because 'we have our Latina project for the year.'" But as Quintero tells the F-Word participants, "You'll have [a better] chance…to get all your films made if you have each other's back rather than competing with each other for the little bit of resources they throw your way as women of color."

These sister visionaries say that they are compelled to keep howling at the moon, for the sake of past and coming generations. "We don't want to be the last ones doing it…there are people before us who did it, we're doing it now, and we want to swell the ranks. The movement needs a serious recruitment drive, because the same 50 people are doing all of the work, and it's not working for us," Quintero maintains.

Miranda adds, "With the BETs out there and our folks engaging in very corporate media, perpetuating certain visions and silencing other voices, we have no choice. We have to seize the power of popular media if we're going to start effecting social change. We definitely believe that this is democracy-building work."

LaVon Rice is a freelance writer in New Mexico.

Juicy Mangos in Guanabee!

Check out this article that appeared today in Guanabee, a cool new Latino humor blog!

http://guanabee.com/2007/08/guanabee-so-michelle-juicy-man-1.phpmore


Michelle Herrera Mulligan Talks To Us About Her Juicy Mangos

We often take jabs at Latino fiction, but when we heard there was a collection of Latina erotica due out this month, we had to make an exception. After all, it's not everyday we get to read about tetas and palos. Well, okay, it is everyday, but not necessarily for work. To get the lowdown on this landmark publication, we tracked down Michelle Herrera Mulligan, a one time drinking buddy of ours and the woman brazen enough to edit Juicy Mangos, the world's first "English-language Latina erotic fiction," to ask her a few questions.

Guanabee: So Michelle, is erotic fiction just a fancy term for porn?
Michelle: You could call it a "thinking girl's" porn. These stories are character-driven, you actually get to know the protagonists really well. By the end, you're really invested in what happens to them.

Guanabee: Hmmm…that's so different from how we usually experience sex. So, why do you think the editors thought of you to edit a collection of, "thinking girl's porn?"
Michelle: I edited an anthology on coming of age in America as a Latina, and I pushed the writers to take a raw, uncensored look at their experiences. Some of the stories ended up being really sexual. I guess they liked what they saw.

Guanabee: We see. So you're kind of a known suelta.

m_6d1e07ba7227fb68e32127595b79447d.jpg

Michelle: I think there's definitely a secret suelta somewhere inside, but I'm a taken woman. For now, I relegate all my sluttiness to the written word.

Guanabee: Your story in the collection, "Juan and Adela," is based on your own mom's marriage to a much younger man. How did that go over with the family?
Michelle: Let's just say I'm glad that, like many immigrants, they haven't quite mastered the internet thing.

Guanabee: We know what you mean. You should try hiding an entire blog! Anyway, without giving anything away about your story, did your mom's real-life story end the same way?
Michelle: My story was based on the concept of an older woman who finds a connection with a younger man, any similarities between that and my mom's story end there. (There's no way I'd be able to write a sex scene picturing my mom and my stepdad together, I'm not that twisted!)

Guanabee: Oh, come on, Michelle, we've had dinner with you.
Michelle: Really. My mother and my stepdad had a happy ending. They've been married over 10 years, even though he's still young enough to be my brother.

Guanabee: Go Michelle's mom. So what about you? Have you ever been involved with a much younger man? If not, would you like to be? (Our associate editor, Carlos, wrote that question.)
Michelle: I haven't yet.

Guanabee: Did you know Carlos bears a striking resemblance to Mario Lopez?
Michelle: Well, if my boyfriend broke up with me, I would definitely consider it. We all deserve a Demi Moore moment!

Guanabee: Word. Or an Ellen Degeneres one. Like how Juicy Mangos starts off right away—bang. Lesbian affair with the sister-in-law. You're not fucking around. Or you are fucking around. Which shows you aren't fucking around. As an editor, is there any rhyme or reason to how you ordered the stories?
Michelle: Yeah. We chose to open the book with Mayra Montero's story, "Diamondback," because she draws you in from the first word.

Guanabee: There's no doubt about it: lesbians sell. By the way, since each of the stories takes place during a holiday, we were wondering which holiday you think makes people the most randy.
Michelle: I think most people like Halloween because they get to disguise themselves or take on another persona. Personally, I love Christmas. There's something about twinkling lights and cold weather that really turns me on.

Guanabee: So you get turned on by defiling the birthday of Baby Jesus. Do you think most Latinas are kinkier than other people?
Michelle: I think we're more uninhibited and passionate than most. We just don't talk about it!!

Guanabee: Until now, Miss Wordy Pants. Speaking of modesty, have you had a chance to see the Noelia sex tape? Would her story have made it into your anthology?
Michelle: My boyfriend told me about it, and I just watched it right now. From what I've seen, I'm not sure her story would have made it in. It seems a little staged to me.

Guanabee: You think? So, speaking of bogus sex stories, Carlos writes to Penthouse Forum all the time, but no word on a publishing date. Any advice for him?
Michelle: Keep at it! Your day will come.

Guanabee: And finally, to save our readers some time, what do you think is the nastiest thing in the book? And on what page will we find it?
Michelle: I have to say one of the best, and nastiest, moments comes in Elisha Miranda's, "A Kiss For Lares", pages 208 to 211. Let's just say the concept of a juicy mango is taken to new heights.

Guanabee: Ah yes, they really get that mango up there. Well, thanks so much for answering our questions, Michelle. Anything you'd like to leave our readers with before you go?
Michelle: A word of advice: don't read the book in public. My male friends have told me this can have embarrassing consequences.

There you have it, folks. Buy a book, hide your woody. Advice to live by.

Juicy Mangos release events this and next week

Hello friends and supporters,

The moment is finally here--we will be celebrating the release of Juicy Mangos, erotica collection at two fun, ABSOLUTELY FREE events this week!

Please join award-winning authors Sofia Quintero, Elisha Miranda, and Michelle Herrera Mulligan at Hue-Man Books, hueman.booksense.com, on Wednesday, August 8th, for our book launch for Juicy Mangos, the first literary Latina erotica collection EVER to be published in the United States. The event begins at 6 p.m.

The Details: The bookstore is located on 2319 Frederick Douglas Boulevard, between 124 and 125, at 6 p.m., Directions: Take the A,B,C,D,2,3 train(s) to the 125th Street Stop., or take the Westside Highway (9A) - 125th Street Exit. Hue-Man Bookstore is next to Magic Johnson Theatre.

OR

You can join us at Barnes and Noble-The Bronx, 290 Baychester Avenue, at 7 p.m. on Thursday night---

Directions:From Manhattan, public transport: Take the 6 to Pelham Bay Par, then leave the station and transfer to the Number 12 bus to Bay Plaza--the store is located in the Bay Plaza Shopping Center in Co-Op City
Driving: From Manhattan: Take the Bruckner Expressway or Cross Bronx Expressway, East to 1-95 North, take exit 11—Bartow Avenue, continue to Bay Plaza
For more details call the store at 718-862-3945

OR, in case you can't make it this week...

Join us on August 15, when Elisha and Michelle will be featured as part of the hot In the Flesh series! Here are the details: From juicy mangos to sex on Fire Island and more, August's In The Flesh takes into the bedroom and beyond with steamy stories from some of New York's naughtiest (plus a visiting guest from Minneapolis).
Featuring John Blesso (Sharehouse Confidential), Perry Brass (Carnal
Sacraments), Catherine Lundoff (Crave), Elisha Miranda (The Sista
Hood), and Michelle Herrera Mulligan (Juicy Mangos). Hosted by erotic writer and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel (He's on Top, She's on Top, Caught Looking).

Free candy and cupcakes will be served and authors books will be available for sale. IN THE FLESH EROTIC READING SERIES. 8 PM., AT HAPPY ENDING LOUNGE, 302 BROOME STREET, NYC, (B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey,
http://www.happyendinglounge.com) Free admission
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676
http://inthefleshreadingseries.blogspot.com

Or on

August 16 Juicy Mangos selected for Las Comadres Book Club! Join us at Borders books at 10 Columbus Circle for a discussion on the themes raised in Juicy Mangos diverse, complex stories. Starts at 6:30 p.m. Take the A, B, C, D to Columbus Circle.

Juicy Mangos in the Daily News Viva section this past Wednesday!!!!

BY HALLEY BONDY

Tuesday, July 10th 2007, 11:14 PM

Seven female authors are steaming up the bookshelves with "Juicy Mangos," the first erotica compilation written by Latinas in English.

While bombshells Paulina Rubio and Shakira shake their resounding rumps in public, these real women are working behind the scenes to change the face of Latina sexuality. And for them, rear ends are just child's play.

"Latinas are always on display sexually, but we never see any ownership of that sexuality," says editor and contributor Michelle Herrera Mulligan. "This is sex written in our own style."

The collection has something for everyone: girl on girl, maid on stockbroker, naughty librarians, and more. Each story is written by a different writer, including Puerto Rican prof. Mayra Santos-Febres, Cuban-Puerto Rican author Mayra Montero, and Elisha Miranda, the author of "Sista Hood: On the Mic."

But "Juicy Mangos" (Atria Books, $15) is more than just graphic sex and dirty words — although there is no shortage of these.

Mulligan, also editor of "Border-Line Personalities: A New Generation of Latinas Dish on Sex, Sass, and Cultural Shifting," says her intention was to connect to a Latina readership that grew up confused as to how to deal with their sexuality.

"[Latinas] are capable of shaking their asses to the latest merengue one night and are casually considering re-virgination surgery the next," she notes in the introduction. "Juicy Mangos" is not for typical smut enthusiasts. The sexy scenes are intertwined with tales of broken pasts or supernaturalism. In "Don't Be Mad At Me," by freelance editor Adriana López, a book publicist haunted by her mother's suicide finds solace in offbeat sexual activities with a client.

"We push the line with the sex scenes," says López, a Colombian-American living in the East Village and editor of the recently released "Fifteen Candles," a collection of quinceañera stories. "But it's different than pure erotica. "

Despite its hodgepodge nature, "Juicy Mangos" marks a milestone. Eroticism has always been ingrained in Latina literature, but this is the first such compilation to earn a place on the erotica shelves in the label-friendly United States.

And the stories are certainly racier than the authors' typical fare. Mulligan, a Mexican-American living in Brooklyn, said it was difficult to negotiate her upbringing with her contribution to "Juicy Mangos."

"We Latinas all have these Catholic schoolgirl moments, like 'what if my mother reads this?'" says Mulligan. "We had to process that feeling and overcome it." If the writers are so prudent, how will the Latina public feel about "Juicy Mangos"?

"I think a lot of women will be very excited about it," says Mulligan, "even though they won't say it out loud."

The older one becomes, the more you realize how important it is to to heal from past wounds in order to push forward. Key word here is, HEAL. Sometimes we don't forgive, but we find a way in our hearts to let go or move on that feels healthy. Often, as children we are the one's that have anger towards our parents. I'm the first one to say, I'e had my issues with both my parents. But, my constant source of steady love has always come from my mother. Despite our differences at moments throughout my life, my mom is always willing to listen, admit she's wrong sometimes and grow with me. Sometimes that growth is not agreement, but it's finding that way to accept each us as we are, individuals that should never be compartamentailzed. Rather, we should be allowed to grow. Today, I stand next to my mother, us both very different people. If I could only tell what my mother has dealth with in her life, many would understand why she has become my hero. She's not perfect, but neither am I. We're both real, we make mistakes and we work on our relationship. My mother is my hero in that her love for her family is always more important than being right. A lesson that has taken me a long time to learn. She's so humble and it is seldom I hear a mean word about ANYONE uttered from her lips. Now, she is stubborn, but given what she has seen in her life it has meant her survival. I must say that I also inherited this attribute.

I was blessed having both my mother and stepdad with me during the holidays. How beautiful to see my mother find her soulmate in her 50's after many failed marriages. Every time I see her act goofy with Chuck or look in each other's eyes I'm sooo happy for her. We also got to share the difficulties of not having a stable father in our lives growing up. Often my mother has felt bad that my sperm donor, father such an awful parent. But, what I didn't tell my mother was that in the end her love made up for not having a present dad in the end. I can't fully express the healing that occured for me with this realization.

My mom and I shared something special this holiday. We went to my grandfather's grave, my mother's father for the first time. My grandmother, whom I must say has always been an incredible grandmother to me. But, as a mother she was far from perfect. She kept my mother and her four other children from having a realastionship with my grandfather. When my abuelo died, he died on Halloweens Eve from a heart attack after four Puerto Rican children came trick or treating at his door. The cute kids reminded him of his own children whom my grandmother kept from seeing. He ran several blocks to the projects where his sister lived on the lower east side in New York and died in her arms.

When my grandparents divorced not only did my abuela have him fixed, she stopped speaking Spanish to her children so they wouldn't be able to communicate with their father. When he died, his children we're not able to mourn his death or say their good-bye's. He was buried in Long Island Cemetary since he was a merchant marine, that was how he left Puerto Rico. I visited his grave for the first time with my mother the day after Christmas. Many of the tombstones said, BELOVED father or survived by blank blank children. My abuelo, Franciso Miranda had nothing but that he was a gun men on a ship during WW II. This was the first time any of his children had ever visited him, for many years we didn't even know where he was buried. It touched my heart in so many ways to share this moment with my mother who always carried so much anger toward her father. My mother was able to let go, and in many ways I feel she healed wounds for generations to come.

R.I.P. Abuelito