Well...its been one year today since I graduated...And so much has happened between now and then. One year ago I finally got to dress in a black sack with a funny hat and get the piece of paper that is sposed to help me get a good job. I was so damn happy that it was finished at last. The last half of my degree I was unhappy with, partly because the subjects sucked, partly coz the science administration was hopeless and kept stuffing me around, and partly because I wasnt enjoying the topics and felt it just wasnt me. I always though more doors would be open to me, but because I didnt super duper specialise in something, it made it harder..

My work at the science centre has made me realise that I want to do a teaching degree for middle school kids but I cant afford it at the moment coz I'm still considered an international...and it looks like the only way I can get a permanent residency is to marry an Australian citizen...which due to my current relationship wouldnt be hard at all. It just sucks that I have to depend on someone else to get myself into a country I've been living in for 10 years, buts thats the way things are nowadays...

Onto other news, I'm so grumpy at Square Enix :( They pushed back AGAIN Final Fantasy 12 to February now!! They've been working on it since 2001 for goodness sake! Come on guys...Japan and the US have it for months now, gimme gimme gimme!

Luke and I have pre-ordered WoW The Burning Crusade today, that should be on in mid January, its gonna be pretty good. But lately in WoW I've just been pvp-ing to try and get the epic pvp gear which is better than most drops in 20 man instances which is what our guild is doing atm. I want the crossbow so badly!  I also need to level my mage up coz we're always short on the AoE and shes pretty cool. My folks bought WoW for my little brother so I gotta help him learn how to play.

I also need to get my bum into gear with another game. A work friend lent my Final Fantasy 9 to play as its nearly impossible to get a copy of it! It would cost me 100 dollars to ship it from interstate and another 100 to buy it! As if! I'm not spending 200 dollars on a ps1 game. So I gotta get into that as well.

Anyways..its 12:20 am and I got a busy day tomorrow...Joseph (my brother) has a bday party at the pool in the early afternoon and then is going to another friends house for a sleepover, big day for my lil Joey, and I gotta run around town with mum. Alice Springs is getting a lot of new changes,  its going through a little commercial boom which would be good for the town...Now all they need to do is ship Alice Springs closer to Adelaide and its all jake :)

Night...

Well, thats it..done and dusted....Today was my very last day at the science centre...Luke was very sweet and asked if he could come watch the last show and he did, and it was nice just showing him a hint of what I used to do. It was one of my best shows, and surprisingly I was calm throughout it all...that is, until I was about to leave. I got a letter from a year 1/2 class thanking me for coming and teaching them about maths, and I started to get really teary eyed...and then as I was walking out the door, I realised I wouldnt be walking through them again, and I had a big cry with Luke giving me a cuddle outside the building..And after I did that I felt a lot better. A chapter of my live is complete.

I have to say...the day I started working there, it started the best year of my life. Not only did I get my dream job, Luke and I moved in together at last, I had money to spend and save, our own lil place and I worked out my relationships with people and figured out which ones were lost and which ones were salvageable. All in all, I gained a lot from this year and from working at the centre. I learned lots of science things that I didnt get back in high school, I learnt how to deal with people better (seeing that most adults behave worse than kids), I learnt that I ultimately want to end up working with kids (around middle school age) and I want to encourage kids to keep going with science even if its hard, coz its worth it in the end and its fun. Its just sad that it had to end on such bitter terms. I feel the people running it havent just let me down, but they let down all SA kids, especially the rural ones who dont get a lot going their way.

But I know that this will open more opportunities for me. As long as I was in that job, I wasnt going to try anywhere else, it was kinda holding me back. When I started, I had meant for it to be a stepping stone..So now I can start looking for better and new things. Things were meant to be I suppose...Its just hurtful.

Anyways, heading to Alice Springs tomorrow morning after dropping the kitten at the airport to be flown there, should make it to Coober Peedy, then on to Alice on Thursday. So I gotta go pack and stuff now :D

...soo...damn...tired.....On my feet for over 7 hours on the go non stop at the video store today..thank god I only work there casually. I really really hate it there...How I hate people...well stoopid people that is..and 95% of the world is stoopid.

Well its probably time to explain my working situation. From November 20 last year, I've been working at a place that is a science educational centre, I can't really say the name atm. Its an educational centre where we "edutain" kids with science by doing shows and getting them involved with hands on activities. We go out to school or they come to us and its really really really a lot of fun. Didnt get paid as much as we should have but we all did it out of the love for the job. To me, this was my ideal job, I was so happy here..it had everything I wanted. Nice people to work with, working with kids, working with science and getting kids to share in my interest and love for science by blowing up stuff and setting things on fire and playing with liquid nitrogen and balloons and stuff. You know..showing kids science isnt all lab coats and boring stuffy peoples. It was a lot of hard work but it was fun.

I was also working at a local video store (since sometime in July) to help make some extra cash coz I was only a casual at the science centre (most people were if they werent creating scripts and shows). And I hate it...more on that later.. I really appreciate the work I'm getting and for my friend who helped me get it, but its so...bleahguhuihngdf.

However, we had been in some strife for a while now apparently. 4-5 years ago we had to move from a prime location in the city to some place in the north, to a place that was 1/10 of the size of where we were. And just recently, we were told that the Centre was to be "winding down its operations by the end of  Term 4". Which means, we're closing go away. It all had to do with the committee and politics and some...well if you want to know, pst me about it. So..the Centre is closing down and I'm soon to be back out into the wide world of worklessness. My very last science show is the 12th of December..from 9 to 12ish...And apparently the newspaper is coming and a photographer...great what I really  needed when I know I'm going to be trying really hard not to cry in front of 30 kids and a camera.

Lukes been a great show of support and inspiration, which really helps me everyday when I go into work and then leave knowing that every day passing  is one day closer to not being there anymore. He knows that I'm struggling internally with whats happening and I love him all the more for being kind.

So..next Tuesday the 12th, I'm out of my ideal/perfect job...and the next day, the 13th I'm driving back home with Luke to Alice Springs for the holidays for about a month. So all you Alice mob, if ya wanna catch up, you just let me know ok?

So..during the Christmas holidays, I gotta rework my resume and throw it out again at people...But I dont know who would want me now...I had finished uni in July last year and  graduated December later that year...and between then, only the science centre gave me the chance to prove myself. Being in Science is really hard because they want you to have your honours and masters and PHDs and what have yous. But the Investigator saw my enthusiasium and my potential and took it and enhanced it, so I am forever thankful to them for helping me out along the way, and for believing in me...

Anyways I'm depressed now so I'm gonna go to bed, so I can wake up and go back to the video store at 9 am until needed..

Well, after discovering that I made this account over a year ago and then forgot about it till recently, I also discovered some messages that I never read as well. Two of them from very close old friends that I havent spoken to for a while. One of them is from the States when I used to live in California and the other from when I was in high school in Australia. So even though I'm still waiting on one friend, I heard from two others and can get back in contact with them as well. Which has inspired me to find more friends on this thing. The net is truely a great thing.

Anyways, went to Carols by the Creek tonight, which is exactly the same as Carols by Candlelight..but by a creek :P. It was cold but the singing was nice and it felt good to belt out Christmas songs and not have to worry about anyone hearing my bad singing over the people with microphones.

I've got some work this week which is nice, more money for Christmas I spose. I just hate working casually at the video store...but its in the morning most days so it'll be quiet..one can hope. I have two days of working at the Investigator Science Centre...more about that later, I'm not in the mood right now to explain it.

Anyways, I'm off to play WoW some more. Its crack for geeks :P I have a level 60 raiding hunter but I wanna level up my mage which is currently level 46. If only they could bottle essence of WoW, then more geeks could leave their homes without having virtual withdrawal symptoms :P

Well..here am I on MySpace..a last resort to finding an old friend, (lets call her S) my first friend in Australia back when I first moved here over 10 years ago. We've been through a lot of good times and the bad and have lots of good memories.

We used to be in contact all the time after she moved away, but as time and distance got longer, we talked less and less..but she was always contactable. Then it stops, all my emails go through unanswered and I am worried for my friend. Then one day I get told that the email accounts no longer existed, and now I have no means of contact.

So through another old friend that I met at the same time (thanks so much, you know who you are) she informed me that S had a MySpace account which has brought me here. So now I've sent out a friend invite, and now I wait. And the only way I can let her know I care and want to talk to her is through a public forum...

Please S, even if you dont want to be my friend anymore, can you please tell me that you're ok? Can you please tell me why you stopped answering my emails and didnt let me know what was going on? Why did you lost contact with me? Your Hotmail and Yahoo accounts both just stopped...

I can see from your account that you're happy and I'm glad for that.