From the moment I first saw you, standing there that way, I knew I had to have you. I'd found my love that day.

And then you smiled and spoke to me. I thought that I might die. That southern charm in your voice, that twinkle in your eye.

I never believed that stuff before about love at first sight, but as you stood there smiling at me, I knew it must be right.

Now all of these years later, a grandchild on the way, I love you now even more, then I did on that first day.

My head!  It's pounding!  Whats wrong with me?  It's hurting so bad, I can't even see! 
It's starting to scare me,  this pain in my head. This must be a migraine.  I wish I was dead. 
I'm sick at my stomach now too,  ain't that great?  Get me to the doctor!  Now!  I can't wait!
The doctor that saw me said "You will be fine" ,  but I didn't believe her.  I just felt like crying.
She gave me a shot in the ass then she said " Just give it a minute to get to your head".
A few minutes later,  I felt kinda funny.  This drug that she gave me was right on the money!
My head now pain free,  and my stomach felt fine,  but now I was thirsty.  I wanted some wine.
So when I got home I had a glass or three.  The pain in my head now a distant memory.

As I walk along the beach, leaving footprints in the sand, I wish you were beside me, holding me by the hand.

When I sing songs in the shower, as I always do, I'm singing favorite love songs, thinking always of you.


And always as I lay in bed, trying to fall asleep, I think how much I loved you, and I begin to weep.


But I know that you can't be here, with me evey day, because you are in Heaven, and that is were you'll stay.

My interview with Jeremy Shipp
May 7th, 2007

Q: Where did you grow up? (Assuming you actually did)
A: I was born in North Dakota, but due to my fear of snowmen, my family decided to move to Southern California. I was raised here, most of my years in the same house, and I remain in the same town.

Q: When did you first realize you wanted to be a writer?
A: According to my parents, I used to try to play with pens and pencils when I was a baby. Then, in 4th grade, I wrote a very long short story, and found the whole experience to be quite satisfying. I think then, I knew. Then when I was 13, I started my first novel.

Q: Who are you favorite writers?
A: Arundhati Roy, Daniel Quinn, Piers Anthony, Kurt Vonnegut, Brett Easton Ellis, Amy Hempel, among many others.

Q: If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
A: I really cherish living close to my family, but assuming that my entire familial tribe would be magically transported with me, I'd probably enjoy living somewhere like the Galapagos Island. I've always loved the Galapagos Islands (despite the fact that I've never been there) and whenever I had to choose a place to write a report about in school, I would always choose the Islands. I like nature.

Q: Do you prefer dogs, cats, or hedgehogs?
A: I prefer cat-dogs with spines.

Q: Do you yahoo?
A: No, but I wish I could yodel.

Q: Do you have any ideas for future books floating around in that crazy head of yours?
A: I'm in the middle of writing so many books right now it's not even funny (well, sort of funny.) My problem is that when I'm writing, I tend to get too many ideas for new books, so I have to write those down, so that I don't lose them. It's a vicious cycle, but luckily I end up finishing most of what I start.

Q: What are your thoughts on Jon Bon Jovi?
A: His name is fun to say.

Q: When you first started writing "Vacation" did you know where you were going with it?
A: I didn't have an extensive outline on paper or in my mind. I did have some general ideas, but I didn't know everything.

Q: What was your favorite vacation and why?
A: I'll split this into two answers. My favorite childhood vacation was a cross-country drive across America with my family. I loved seeing so much with the people I care about. As an adult, my favorite vacation has been a trip to Disneyland with my life partner, Lisa. I'd been to Disneyland many times before, but it was very special going there with her for the first time.

Q: Do you dream in color?
A: Yep, and Technicolor.

Q: creative writing aside, what other talents do you possess?
A: I play the piano and guitar. I write songs. I've animated some flash cartoons. I'm pretty good at painting (houses), and I can move plastic straws with the power of my mind.

Q: What other talents do you wish you had?
A: I wish I could move slightly larger plastic straws with the power of my mind.

Q: Are you single? If so, would you consider dating my daughter?
A: I'm very much in a wonderful relationship.

Q: Boxers or briefs?
A: Boxers who are briefly violent, and then move on to saving the whales.

Q: Do you believe in God?
A: I believe in many things spiritual, but it would probably take a book or two to really get into the specifics.

Q: how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
A: 24.

Q: Do you believe Humpty really fell, or do you believe he was pushed?
A: He was pushed, but he paid someone to do it. You see, he blamed the fall on the King of the neighboring kingdom, so that he could justify a rotten egg attack the next day.

Q: Have you saved a bunch of money on your car insurance by switching to Geico?
A: I haven't, but I have saved money on everything ever since I found a Gecko that lays golden eggs.

 

what does it mean when you say your my friend? would you be with me until the end?

what does it mean when you say that you care? if I need you, will you be there?

what does it mean when you say "keep it real"? is that supposed to show how you feel?

what does it mean when you say that you love me? doesn't that mean that you just want to do me?

and what does it mean when you say shit like "good luck"? am I supposed to think that you give a fuck!