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Last Updated: 12/7/2009

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Status: Single
City: MINNEAPOLIS
State: MINNESOTA
Country: US
Signup Date: 5/6/2005

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Friday, October 31, 2008 

Current mood:  thirsty
Category: Friends


there have been many farewells. many many farewells.
they have all had different meanings and sometimes they may have confused one clique of fans & freinds.
But they made sense to me.
each one opened up a door to another door, and another.
this farewell is mine.
v.mercy.
no, I'm not going anywhere. not yet anyway.I do have a 1 year ole musical project called MK ( AKA MERCYKILL/MADKAT) and some multimedia aspirations which have taken up my time.
so tonight-
the moon will cook & the memories will weep again
as the last man standing scratches and claws
yes, its devils night, and the spirit must awaken.

   10 years ago, I arrived in Minneapolis. Many months past before i finally moved out of my van and into punk house/ castle chaos. It was hard, but the chill finally defeated me. On Halloween 1998 apox did not have a show, so instead i watched television with tears & fears of the long cold winter ahead. My room was the size of childs bed & a table and one chair. In a sense, the size of a van. But it felt smaller. Anyway, that night, while a party raged beneath me on the lower levels of chaos, I had a visitor.
   A feral mouse that came to visit me frequently during the dark hours, and as our friendship grew, i would offer it food & sanctuary from the cats that stalked the castle & my mouse friend would remind me that freedom is all about trust. Something I had tested and lost. something i was coming to terms with outside & inside.    anyway, my mouse friend would crawl up and look me in the eye when the house was asleep and feast on strategic food crumb placement.. I had some christmas lights strung across the short space that made up the width of the room.
My little friend  would play " walk the tight rope" on. remind me of my connection to the wild things.
A metaphor for my life I suppose.

tonight,  I have more musical material with my new band than my lifes work "Apocalypse Theatre" and although in other lands, apox is alive & well, & will make appearances that are so much different than the apox the twin cities knows. I must say, that in minneapolis too many shadows are dancing on the walls, speaking tongues, and making me very sad. This piled on by expectations  has lead me to realize; that this is the time for me to accept change. and of course it is not with a bang but with a whimper. It will not be spoken, it will not be the theme. No just this whimper. So tonight we celebrate the animal spirits & i ask to myself and here, "where are they hiding now?"   I am happy to know that there are a  few apox survivors who still remain in my circle albeit undertaking new roles & lives. But any moment/excuse to come together is bliss for me. so tonights set consist of our most familiar anthems mixed in with a few songs that bridge the gap bewteen MK & Apox. Songs that were written during the last couple of years in the shadow of my "Harsh Reality". They travel onward with me now in a new direction. They are part of the new album I am performing live  Halloween as MK (mercykill/madkat) @ Memory Lanes.  yes, the lil monster was formed from the fragments of the apocalypse and has features that remind me of its baby momma/daddy. "Yup"

There is chaos in MKs veins and its all because of Apocalypse Theatre.

Like I said there are no real good byes. this is evolution & because of all I have learned & all the good friends ( and enemies) I have made from being a nomad & then staying in this city so long, I know there is still a promising future for the caravans I dream about. maybe one day they will rise up and become the alternative so many of us need/crave, & so many of us fear.  until then, i will always be painting in blood, and i promise to myself with that odd trust in time:i will never pretend to be something i am not. and i prey/pray & fight on for those who have lost the spark & for those who will fire it up on the next page..
rest well my friend "apox"
where the wild things roam
where forever lives.


~mercy



"see ya in arizona or kansas city or st. louis , or seattle, or new orleans, or baltimore or...."

primaltek.net
Thursday, September 06, 2007 

Category: Parties and Nightlife
this is it..the last twin city show until ..hmmm
until spring 2008 or beyond.

Hosted By:
apocalypse theatre
When: Tuesday Sep 11, 2007
at 9:30 PM
Where: Pi
Minneapolis, MN 55400
United States
Description:
apocalypse theatre

Click Here To View Event
Saturday, January 13, 2007 

Category: Friends
What was to be a 10 show 13 day tour became a 5 show 7 day adventure.
The reason's why it was cut short are not the point of this entry, it was just was meant to end that way...I am here to leave another scratch on this digital domain for my friends and those who will one day be my friends to revisit or discover who we are..Why we struggle on.

Against all odds, we have survived as a dream made flesh, and even as the sound and face of it all changes, the roots of it creation remain, and even though We Are Still Lost in America,it is clear that the phoenix is on the rise again.

So even though this tour was cut short, this  tour was fucking amazing. we returned home from ice blizzards and finacial ruin with a smile because of the new alliances, and the promise of more to come. For all that went wrong much more went right. We may have found a potential new base camp, U-35 is begining to expand, the streets are starting to respond.

We created a new version of Apox that not only rocked, but for those who witnessed our friendship on and off stage understood why the music was only the soundtrack of something bigger.

We now return to lick our wounds, heal, and prepare to once again return to the lost highways. So, to all those who doubt the validity of this thing called Apox, we live on, in the dark corners, secret gardens, and underground domains. We have survived the test of time again and again. To those who wish us ill, we simply state. Your hate is making us stronger. And to those who validate us with support, you are why we are here.

thank you.

I am going to end this post with a paste up ripped fro the blog of Lindsey , one of the Apox singer's.
here is my friend's Lindsey's straight talk...

"Every time I go on a tour with Apox, my graditude and sentimentality will drive me to write a blog about it.  This one will be a bit different. The events to take place have been very special to me that I needed to document for myself  which would explain why this blog is very long.  The strange events of this wacky tour must be recalled.  As anyone would know, when you're on a tour with a group of people, it eventually becomes its own little world.  And the world outside becomes small as you become more surrounded by this inner circle.  It becomes its own entity. For the Apocalypse Theatre Wild, Wild West Recon Tour, the line-up consisted of our regular members V.Mercy, MadKat, Joolie, Calvin, and myself.  We have been very lucky to get Mercury Mad to join us on guitar, who is based in Lawrence, Kansas.  Best known for his work with Vibralux, and now is Mercury Mad and the Plastic Bitches. Who was also the opening act for this tour. We had also managed to hijack Ken Symptom from Chicago, who is currently the drummer for Project 44 and The symptoms. As these 2 members had a tie-in from our last tours, they went ahead and joined us.  We also had DJ Nature, Johanna (violin/bass), and Stacy (roadie/Evil Bunny). Here is an example of the moments shared on the road and definitions of the phrases managed to be repeated constantly throughout this time:
 
KUM N GO- Gas station with funny name founded in the Iowa/Missouri area.
 
GOTH JELLO-  Is a term Merc mangaged to come up with.  As we were stashed in this circle of love seats in the van with the equipment crammed behind us, this brilliant term came to birth. As everyone was sitting upright, eventually everyone managed to fall asleep on eachother, sliding down from our seats.  Which caused us all to meld together till we're all tangled in eachother's limbs...Which caused us to become "Goth Jello".
 
VENTROLOQUIST FARTS- On a road trip, there's always the one that's shamelessly farting.  That would be our drummer Ken.  Who has this incredible talent for "throwing" farts.  As I was walking up the hall towards the social circle of my bandmates, Ken managed to turn a little bit toward my direction, pinching off an echoey fart my way. Rather than make the fart sound like it was coming from his direction, it sounded like it came from behind me and down the hall.  I paused, looked around, and said "It wasn't me".  I almost got the blame until someone figured it out and Ken confessed.
 
THE "KERNEL OF TRUTH"- In a deep conversation with Mercury, I told him that If I didn't talk out of my ass, I'd probably never have anything to say.  In his supportive nature, he replied, " Yeah, well, with all the corn coming out of your ass, there's probably a small kernel of truth hidden somewhere".
 
THE BUTT-FUCKING BRADY BUNCH"- This gas station attendant asked me if we're all dressed up for a costume party.  The results of the question are given.
 
DIGITAL COMMUNICATION CODE 01001100101- This is the language we speak when border police arent around...MUTANTS.
 
"ASS WRATH"- Possibly a reference of spooning till one's ass manages to push another person completely to the other side of the bed, or a really great band name.
 
TILT- An energy drink with the alcohol already combined.  Or getting "Tilted" is saying, "Im going to bar next door to get that energy drink with the booze already in it".
 
TITS- A reference to something that is awesome "Do I look totally tits?" or "That is so tits!"  I had to assure Merc this is how he looked before most performances.
 
WHAMBULANCE- When too much whining from a faggy glam/goth band takes place.  We need "Whambulances". Me especially.
 
NIPPLE STAR AND BALLS- Ken wore a star on his nipple and talked about balls a lot.
 
BRINGIN' SEXY BACK- We have all agreed that Justin Timerlake's new song will end up in a Subway commercial "Bringin' sandwich back". Bringing up this song became a circular trend.
 
"YOU CANT SAY "FUCK" ONSTAGE, ASSHOLE"
Now for the details of the tour and my personal diary (LONG):
The 1st night, we played at Balanca's in Kansas City.  Which is always our 1st stop when doing a U-35 Recon Tour. The 2nd night, we played a town in Arkansas. We had a great crowd that loved to dance. The show was really fun except for the annoyance that we were all poor and had to pay for our own beer.  As I was prepared with my cheapest of all decent beer. I had it set onstage to start a minimal buzz, until Mercury, the person who gave me shit about how gross beer is and how he's allergic.  He takes a swig then hands it to Calvin (Notorious Beer Stealer), then hands it back to Merc to play beer bottle slide metal guitar (Steve Vai shit). Hands me an empty bottle during the song.  Jesus Christ...The hotel was a fancy condo.  Ken breaks into our suite, raids our candy basket and runs out manically.  Merc steals the cute Dorothy (OZ) basket with the black linen.  V. cancels the tour :( Then Waffle House people think we're famous and wants us to sign shit, take pictues and makes us wear hats. We played a freezing night in Amarillo,TX.  Then Bisbee, Then Tuscon @ the Congress Hotel, which is this beautiful historic hotel they set us up in with a great venue.  Not many showed up for that.  But it was OUR show.  WE had fun!  It was our last night to all have fun together before going home.  It was an Apox love fest! (metaphorically speaking). But we did get naked.
 
NEW YEARS/ BISBEE STORY
If I can recall all the events of Bisbee, AZ.  This has been the most memorable experience of my life! If I can describe Bisbee in anyway, Think winter in a misty desert mountain.  It is a beautiful seemingly sleepy mountain town that gave birth to memories of a romance of Rock N Roll and great friendships. The people have been so warm and welcoming and were only strangers for a mere second after meeting them.  We drove 15 hours to get to Bisbee.  As our van was pulling in, the streets were lined with hundreds of people. We couldn't even get through, it was so crowded. We loaded our equipment into El-Change-O, which is an art gallery as well as a music venue.  Mercury went on 1st, then Apox. Just before the ball dropped, we were invited to lead the New Years parade near a 20ft dragon from the gallery.  So we went ahead and led the parade with the Tom drums, pirate flags, and lanterns.  The parade went up the main street and followed up to the tip of a hill which was the city park and ended up on a dome stage.  As the parade settled up there, it was all dancing and celebrating. I've never seen such a display.  It seemed like a festival, only there was nothing organized about it.  After that, Apox went back down the hill to finish our music set. Bisbee has the most bazaar people, I love it!
After that intense night, we were invited to stay at Gretchen's house, who owned the venue.  Only 3 blocks up, she had a house that sat wedged into the mountain hill overlooking the neighborhood.  The next morning they made us a huge breakfast and went out later for bloody mary's.  By then we had a chance to walk around and meet locals, who are so nice!  If not even that, we were invited to play yet even another show.  Rather than do a heavy Apox set, it was a mellow acoustic one.  Mercury pulled off an amazing, energetic set.  I went up up afterwards to play guitar, Merc playing lead for me.  Unfortunately I had been really sick with a cold that night, so I couldn't sing very well and my energy was low.  This night was special as well because the crowd and the solo acoustic sets were more intimate.  We felt closer, The setting was amazing.  After I finished, V went up to do his thing and we finished with an acoustic version of Rouge Anthem.  As the night continued it became even more special talking to all the individuals and learning more about those I didn't know very well.
As that went on, I realized I was getting tired and wasn't quite drunk enough.  So Mercury took me to the next bar to where I could get "Tilted" (see definition above).  Another great moment to where you can hang out with fellow bandmates and locals away from your venue and listen to jukebox music.  We had locals approaching us saying they had a great time at the show the night before.  The Tilt almost gave me a heart attack. Fucking great town! Bisbee is.  I will never forget.  Bisbee will always be a special place in my heart.  Thanks to all of you!!! Especially Gretchen!
 
CORNY ASS KERNELS OF SENTIMENT
It is sad the tour had to be cut short, but once again that short time made me realize I now have everything I've been looking for.  I have now traveled to some of the most beautiful places, Im playing music almost every night, I have the most wonderful friendships, and met strange, amazing people on my journey. Im in OZ... In my head, it is one beautiful epic love song. Something by The Cure, maybe...Pictures of you...? haha.  Even though Apox is the 2nd band I've ever played with, I know there's something different and very special about it compared to others. There is so much heart, I am grateful for. And when I say this, it also includes other people who have worked closely (Venus, Harsh Reality, Mercury Mad, and Flat Atom).  For now, my life is perfect.  I need to be on the road forever! Because I will get bored again soon ;) "
 
XOXO Lindsey



Sunday, November 05, 2006 

Current mood:  amused
Category: Parties and Nightlife
So some of you have been asking for the 2002 apox party documentary that was the scene of a zombie attack, so here it is... if you like your brains with wasabi let us know , word is a new zombie short is in the works...


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Sunday, November 05, 2006 

Current mood:  contemplative
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural
Something feels different about "me" today. I think I may have finally healed or at least closed the old festering wounds that have plauged me for all these years...Or at the very least, begun to understand the meaning they have for me, and why I had to finally slow down. I was never feeling sorry for myself, it simply hurt too much to let the pain fade. I had to hold on to the root of its cause until I could understand what had happened to me and why. Yes, I accept the blame, for it was my own mistakes that left me torn up. After I finish cleaning up the aftermath, I will stand again. Maybe the future will be full of new defeats, but I am ready to try & fight for what I believe in again, and I am prepared to die with my boots on. Fuck this sitting still nonsense. There is a lot of work to do in this parasite nation, and a lot of promises to keep in the name of love. After that...I will find the new blood, the old alliances and build up a caravan.
Yes...It is almost time to spread my wings again.

They were not made of paper after all.
~Mercy

   
Tuesday, July 05, 2005 

Current mood:  contemplative
We just performed live @ a punk womens rights festival called C.L.I.T. fest in Minneapolis. A lot of punk rawk and then us as the misfits of the misfits headlining if ya wanna call it that. "Playing last is another way of thinking about it" I was suprised considering the PA was primitive and we only had one monitor that we were recieved with open arms metaphorically speaking. I think we might post one of our new raw cuts of a song inspired by our new friend/fanbase.

v.mercy
Wednesday, June 15, 2005 
    This has been a slow start for me.. I usually keep our titanic ship of pirates active and updated on the information highway, but I am slow these daze.
But if you still happen to stumble across us, please dig deeper, we..me, us..yadda yadda yadda are hungry again. We are working on our 3rd
CD and a DVD. A tour is being considered for the fall and some short weekend sprints might happen towards the summers end. We are also looking for performers of all types, and song writers for both lyrics and electronic compositions. Several Apox projects and mutant side projects are in the works, sprouting up from the soil of our souls and they may desire new blood.

I hope to post new video's, group photo's, and music in the near future, right now, this weary captain needs to cruise down to St. Louis Missouri & Tulsa OK to tie up some loose ends. (insert deep evil laugh Mu-hahahahaha)


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