Dear Humanity, i dont want to talk to you right now. dont take it personally, cause you have been fair with me and i dont have any ill wishes towards you as a whole. you must understand, though, that one individual is entirely capable of tarnishing your stellar reputation. i have learned this first hand. i might add as a sidenote, that i do appreciate your willingness to lend an ear on my behalf, although im aware also that you have no choice, as i am speaking to nobody. anything that i wish to believe, is true to me, so fuck off, by the way. getting back to the point, im not sure that i have a point. i ramble to myself not expecting anything in return. i examine every choice i have made or not made and at the end of the day, a realization is made that i need to stop complaining, whether it be to you, or to me, and keep moving forward. excuses are for people who cannot complete anything. our whole lives we are told that we need a role model to look up to and try to emulate. i am glad that i figured out that a role model can be the exact opposite. personally, i find it easier and more satisfying to have someone around who messes up everything so i can see everything i dont want to be. plus, i enjoy watching others fail. i feed on your failure, and i enjoy nothing more than watching you deteriorate in the wake of my happiness. this is why i sit in my garage every night and play guitar. cause i radiate such a sunny disposition, that nobody can stand to be near me. now is that the most self centered excuse you ever heard? damn i love making excuses. it makes me feel complete. i love you sweetheart, you help me every second of every day. i want to be a little angel on your shoulder so that i can throw a banana peel in front of you on your first step towards a better life. cause banana peels are slippery as fuck. i see it in cartoons all the damn time. so stop thinking that im some sort of mental terrorist and keep an eye on the fellow with the banana farm.

So , Mr. Walsh, time indeed, does keep ticking into the future. A more calloused outlook and a few more rings in the tree appear to be the only things that remain constant. That"s refreshing though, really. I've learned that i am not a proponent of monochromatism. I think that's the right word. If not than fuck you, i never claimed to be a LOCUTIONIST(23 points). There i go, 61 words, 3 conjunctions, one abbreviation, and one number later, i'm off track as usual. Allow me to digress. I've chosen to not have internet access at my immediate residence now for a few years. I wanted to test the amish theory that outside forms of media give satan and all of his minions direct access to your home. Figuring that the internet would be my choice of vehicle to penetrate the households of the world and sow my Unholy Oats(t.m. kevinfarley2008), if i were he, i decided that i'd give it a shot. It turned out that satan must"ve shimmied in through the cable tv in the form of the boston redsox anyways. oh well. So having no internet removed my capability to type shit that makes me laugh or be pissed or whatever. How can i be expected to control the populous with no forum?!! How can i expect you to drop to your knees and repent your sins at my feet while i piss on your back, when my words fall on deaf ears?!! Well you can just unclench your butt cheeks for a few there buttercup. This ship'll be straighter than my cock at a sorority pube shaving party in no time. Now that my empty reassurance has been put out there for you to dip your bread in and suck on, we can move on to more pressing issues, not that i can even think after typing the words Sorority Pube Shaving Party. Although, the words, in and of themselves, are not distracting really. Sorority. an ok visual but not a reason to slam your weenie in the windowsill. Shaving. no need to release the hounds, i mean, i shaved this morning. my face of course. Party. who doesnt love a party, but not the sort of thing that would deter my thoughts. Now you may have noticed i have skipped over the word Pube. Lets say it together. Pube. and again, Pube. Why is it that we balk at a simple word like that. There are other 4 letter words that i guess i can understand but its just really a shame that we cant more openly describe our feelings toward a newcomer in the form of, and this is a totally hypothetical situation and in no way should the names be confused with people in the actual world, "dude, zoli, those guys who work at guitar center are total pubes and i'll never offer them my business again for that very reason". Perhaps im overreacting. That has actually happened before. me overreacting. yeah i know. Like when my neighbor came over right around christmas and brought me a set of potholders that had a tiny nativity scene on them and the next day i woke up early and broke into his car and shit in his glovebox and wiped my asshole with the potholders and then stuck them to the other neighbor, on the other side, his windshield because he said he was gonna go call the cops. It was really none of his business. i gotta go reflect on the day and remind myself that i cant raise a healthy child from behind steel bars. see ya.