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Allan Brocka



Last Updated: 8/9/2009

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Status: Single
Sign: Virgo

City: West Hollywood
State: California

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April 13, 2008 - Sunday 


More pimpin. This weekend my good friend Casper Andreas' film A FOUR LETTER WORD opened here in LA. I love the title, it involves reading and math at the same time. See it while you can.

A FOUR LETTER WORD stars (and is co-written by) Jesse Archer, who plays the hottie they have a threeway with in BOY CULTURE. By the way, that character's name is actually "hottie" in the script. Jesse LOVED being called "hottie" on the set.

Casper and Jesse came into LA this week to promote the film with a lot of nights at a lot of bars. Even a BINGO night, which I attended with my friend Mark. We won nothing.


With Casper Andreas and Jesse Archer.


Charlie David, another star of the film.


Jesse hasn't aged since puberty.


Mark Christopher and I lost at Bingo, but had a bunch of good talks. Oddly, it turned out Casper had worked for Mark 10 years ago. Casper was Ryan Philippe's stand-in in 54, which Mark directed.


Jesse and Mark.

Here are some pics that ubiquitous photographer Brian Putnam took. Check out his work!


Jesse again.


Micah McCain was hosting the bingo night. A weird connection there too. Micah starred in GAY HOLLYWOOD with me waaay back in the day...


Keeping track of the Bingo numbers was a lot more difficult than it ought to have been. It's strange how such an idiotic game can make you feel so untalented.
1:37 AM 
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April 7, 2008 - Monday 


Every now and then I’ll get a random bit of news from some random part of the globe that sort of makes my day. Today I found out RICK & STEVE has been nominated for a Pulcinella Award!

I had no idea what the fuck that is, so I had to look it up. It’s a prestigious Italian animation award that’s given out in Positano, Italy (right under the Tuscan sun). We’re nominated for "Best TV Series for All Ages" against shows from France, Malaysia, Italy and the US. They’re considering Rick & Steve to be Canadian.

All ages? I’m guessing from other the categories, "All ages" really means "not just for kids."

"Pulcinella" is Italian for "Punch," as in the "Punch and Judy" Punch. Apparently the award is shaped like him. I love creepy awards. And one shaped like a wife beater? Wow!

The winners are announced are next weekend, but there is no free trip involved. Which is a pity, because I’m getting really good at fake-smiling and clapping as someone else wins.
6:56 AM 
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April 2, 2008 - Wednesday 


Last night Phillip, Glenn and I went to the Improv to see Rebekah Kochan do her stand-up comedy routine. You might recognize Rebekah from the EATING OUT movies, where she plays the uber-sexified Tiffani.

I love a good abortion joke and Rebekah had lots of them. Also in the set were Alonzo Bodden, who was quite funny, and Drew Carey! Drew had some great toilet humor that he’d never get away with on "The Price is Right."

The lowlight was the disgusting homophobia of Ralphie May. He spent nearly his entire set screaming "FAGGOT" at the audience and compaining about faggots and homo-acting straight guys. He went on to say he’s not homophobic because he supports gay marriage. But argued that he supported gay marriage because (after another long diatribe against gays) he wanted to see two homos fighting over custody of a hamster in a gay divorce.

I’m all for edgy comedy. I’m even for using the word "faggot" in comedy and I love good gay jokes. I have a career based on them. I’m not for banning words. I think homophobia and racism is not merely the use of the word; it’s the intent, point of view and context. Here, the intent, point of view, and context was pure, uneducated homophobia delivered with such anger and vitriol. He had lot to blame on us.

It made Michael Richards’ racist tirade look tame because it was so completely accepted. The largely straight audience laughed. But Phillip, Glenn and I just sat frozen, wondering what to do.

Had I not been a comped guest of my friend, I would have booed and walked out. I didn’t want to tarnish her reputation with the venue. She needs the work. So I just sat there, staring off into space, trying to mentally document his vile words and ignore them at the same time.

In the end I felt complicit in his hate. I wondered if there were other gays in the audience, perhaps someone struggling with his or her sexuality. I wondered how I would feel if they recognized me and read my silence and approval of the act.

I doubt anyone in the audience wanted to go out and physically harm a gay person. But I wondered if there was a parent laughing in the audience. Perhaps a parent with a child like Brandon McInerney, the 14-year old boy who murdered 15-year old Larry King in his classroom less than two months ago... because he was gay. I wondered if this parent might unintentionally foster atmosphere at home that reflected the hateful sentiments being spewed forth on stage. Then I wondered how that parent’s child would treat a gay-acting classmate.

I love Rebekah, but I should have left.


Rebekah talks about her vagina.


Rebekah and her vagina between Phillip and I.


They’re probably thinking of abortion jokes.


The set list was loaded with Last Comic Standing folks.
8:57 AM 
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April 1, 2008 - Tuesday 


I went to a charity event called "Tan for a Cause" yesterday. It was held at a giant tanning salon swimming with reality stars. I’m not sure how they made money or what charity they were raising it for. I just went because it was a couple blocks away and I heard HELLGA from AMERICAN GLADIATORS was gonna be there. How could I resist?

I didn’t see HELLGA but Wolf was there. As were tons of other reality wonders: Debbie Gibson, Jeff Timmons, Real Worlders, Amazing Racers, Top Modelers, Big Brother-ers, etc. Jackie Warner from WORK OUT was the host. I didn’t see her do a show or anything, but I did see her nipples through her shirt.

Afterwards, Drew and I went to yet another SHELTER promo party. You gotta promote. This one was at The Standard hotel. They had a fashion show and gift bags with speedos and EATING OUT 2 DVDs in them.

I ran into a lot of friends and waited 30 minutes to pay a $10 for some water. It was very LA.


The tanning salon felt like a warehouse, only with reality stars climbing all over each other.


They spray-tanned a twink at one point, which was interesting.


Drew and art.


I got in a tanning bed for a second. CREEPY. I’m so glad to have naturally ethnic skin.


At the SHELTER pool party I ran into my buddies Dennis Hensley and Mark Cirillo.


And more buddies, Jason, Rex Lee and Michael Serrato.


For the fashion show, models wore N2N swimwear and circled the swimming pool. Notice how everyone else is bundled up. It was fucking freezing.


The audience, largely made up of bitchy queens, commented on the models’ imperfections, attitudes and walks.


Others merely lusted after them.


No one seemed to notice the garments.
12:00 AM 
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March 29, 2008 - Saturday 


Last night was the theatrical premiere for the gay surfer movie SHELTER. It officially opens today. The after-party was at the old standby, ELEVEN. It’s been a while since I’ve been to one of these, so it was nice to see the other indie film queers lining up for free drinks.

One of my cheeks is really dark red because I just got out of a yoga class where we spent like 15 minutes in frog with our faces smashed against the hardwood floor.


The entrance. I feel like I have a million of these pictures, only with a different poster at the door.


With SHELTER star Katie Walder and producer JD Disalvatore.


John Amaechi is TALL, but I got most of his head in there. His friend Jeff Sheng teaches a class at UCSB and said my work has come up a few times in the papers of his students. I hope he gave them A’s.


With Chad Darnell. We’re working on a script together. A crazy one.


Adam Bouska! I keep forgetting the other guy’s name, I’m such an asshole because I’ve met him a dozen times over the past three or four years.


THE LAIR stars Brian Nolan, Dave Moretti, and Dave’s bf. THE LAIR is about gay vampire witches who operate a sex club.
12:02 AM 
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March 27, 2008 - Thursday 





It’s a hot weekend for queer cinema. Queer films by friends of mine are opening on BOTH coasts tomorrow. It is my pleasure to pimp for them. Because it is our tradition. Pimping. It is how we survive.

In New York, Casper Andreas’ A FOUR LETTER WORD opens. Its star and co-writer, Jesse Archer, appears in BOY CULTURE.

Here on the left coast, Jonah Markowitz’s SHELTER opens in Los Angeles. Produced by JD DiSalvatore (EATING OUT 2) and Anne Clements (who I worked with on PORNO VALLEY).

Both films won awards at Outfest last year need good opening weekends to open in smaller cities across the country. If they’re not opening at your local arthouse theatres, drop the theatre an email and ask for it. I’ve heard of films getting booked after a theatre received just one or two requests for them. It definitely makes a difference!

I might as well pimp myself too. The EATING OUT 2 trailer has passed the ONE MILLION VIEWS milestone on YouTube.



Finally, this just makes me laugh. It’s the lame reality show THE HILLS about rich Beverly Hills brats re-enacted word-for-word with senior citizens. It’s called OVER THE HILLS.

..
10:25 PM 
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March 26, 2008 - Wednesday 



Congratulations to EATING OUT star Jim Verraros. Over at gay.com and planetout.com, he’s the front page story. The sites have a new feature called "The Full Package" where they profile a different entertainment figure with each installment. The first person they featured was Anderson Cooper. Jim is the second!

I confess, I did not thoroughly explore Anderson’s package. Though I’ve heard enough about it from pervs who go to Gold’s Gym.

Jim’s package is a fun inteview that covers everything from being gay during the American Idol tour to his mother’s reaction to watching his role in the racy EATING OUT movie. Read it here.

Words do make a difference.

I whole-heartedly agree with Media Dis&Dat’s take on the difference between the phrases "confined to a wheelchair" and "uses a wheelchair" and thank them for pointing out our usage on the rickandsteve.com site. We’ve changed it happily and learned something that seems so obvious in hindsight.

2:21 AM 
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March 24, 2008 - Monday 


Saturday night my BFF Glenn and I went to two birthday parties. The first, Perez Hilton’s 30th. Or as he called it, Quinceanera Part 2. The second, a network exec’s 40th. I wasn’t feeling very shutterbuggy, so the pictures are limited.

Both parties had a LOT of planning. Extravagant shows, activities, press lines out front, and strict guest lists. It felt like My Super Sweet 16, only with gay 30 and 40-year olds. I kept imagining the tantrums the birthday boys might have had earlier. What a great show THAT would be.

While both were fun and very gay, everything about the second one felt 10 years older. There was a distinct generational difference in everything, from the themes, décor, music, atmosphere, even the way they partied. At 35, I’m exactly in between, so it kind of felt like traveling from my past to my future. Only with more celebrities and corporate sponsorship than I’ll ever know. (The top photo came from Perez’s photo both, sponsored by KY Jelly).


At the 30th with Glenn and Gregg.


My favorite celebrity sighting of the night. Another corporate sponsor.


They were serving absinthe at 30th. I had one tiny glass and MAN, that stuff fucks you up. The 40th was all about coke in the bathroom. I did not partake.


The 30th had gift bags which included these souvenir T-shirts. The 40th distributed Compact Discs.


When we first got there, there was a very sweaty guy dancing like mad on the dance floor. It’s actually RuPaul.
8:22 PM 
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March 22, 2008 - Saturday 


EATING OUT 2’s Marco Dapper is on the cover of Spanish version of Men’s Health this month. (Thanks boy culture for scanning this hot cover). Way to go Marco! He did the English Men’s Health in September, only with less lady...



What the hell, here’s one more. Marco’s November cover of the French Mensuel.



Meanwhile, EATING OUT 1 & 2 star Jim Verraros is hosting afterelton.com’s "Idol Chat with Jim & Penny." They give recaps peppered with inside dish about the current season of idol. Jim’s was a top 10 Idol contestant from the first season, so he knows what he’s talking about. I love Idol Gossip and Jim’s got a lot of it. Here’s a clip, I particularly like the reference to David Archuletta as being in the "Princess Diana seat."




Phillip and I are currently writing the script for EATING OUT 3...
9:07 PM 
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March 21, 2008 - Friday 


This video is fucked up on so many levels. Is it really supposed to make John McCain seem "hip" and "with it?" It’s funny how trying to make the gayest song in the world straight, somehow makes it gayer.

Because I’m forcing myself to stay in and write, I just had groceries delivered to my house from Vons. It was awesome! It made me feel like a millionaire recluse.

It only cost $4.95. I got 20 gallons of water and lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. They actually picked out really good, ripe stuff. I saved an hour of shopping, parking, waiting in line, carrying bags and water bottles to and from the car, and wasting gas (one delivery guy hitting a number of homes is much more efficient than a number of cars making round trips). AND you’re not allowed to tip. How affordable is that?

I may never go to a grocery store again.
11:40 PM 
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March 20, 2008 - Thursday 


I’m still writing season 2 of RICK & STEVE. I’m close to the end but I have a major case of senioritis. I keep staring out the window when I should be writing about creative uses for sperm. So I shut the blinds and live in a cave. It’s weird being inside all this time. You’d think a nerd like me would be used to it by now.

An awesome reader sent me the above art. It’s Nintendo Wii avatars of all the RICK & STEVE characters. I thought it was pretty fucktastic. Last time I played a Wii, I got so frustrated creating my little dude that I gave up and went with one of the ugly defaults. So I appreciate the work that went into this.

I play OBLIVION in my spare time, and my character on that took hours scrolling through color choices and face measurements, but I love him. Told ya I was a nerd.

I just got word that RICK & STEVE will be premiering on UK television this fall. At last! Check it out on E4! And if you’re excited about it,E-mail them and let them know, it really helps. Cheerio and all that.

If you’re too continental to be bothered with England, RICK & STEVE will be featured at the Annecy Animation Festival in France this summer. It’s an awesome festival and I’m praying to Santa Claus to send me a ticket.

RICK & STEVE got a shout out over at Media Dis & Dat as one of the Top 10 TV Shows Featuring Disability. Chuck’s got quite a few interesting uses for his wheelchair next season. I can’t wait to film them.

That’s it. Oh, if you didn’t hear Obama’s speech yesterday, do yourself a big favor and watch it in its entirety, no matter whom you support. I watched it yesterday morning and made me feel good all day. Hopeful.

5:35 AM 
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March 3, 2008 - Monday 

Yesterday I was one of thousands who volunteered at my local Barack Obama Phone Bank to call strangers in Texas to get out the vote tomorrow. I went to a house that was hosting a party in my neighborhood. We all brought our cell phones, laptops, and just started dialing away, reading from scripts.

I hate telemarketers. So it I felt somewhat guilty, knowing how annoying it must be to get a call from someone like me in the middle of "Extreme Home Makeover." (Damnit! You made me miss Tyler Pennington's Tennis Ball room for the cancer boy!) But I've decided, as much as I hate telemarketers, I hate telemarketing even more.



Here are 10 observations.

1. Texan men sound HOT. Even when they're angry staunch republicans. Oh, that sexy, gruff twang. "I don't like Hillary or Obama, pardner. I'm votin' Republican. Always have. Always will."

2. There are a lot of BILLYs in Texas.

3. Only about 5% of people who answered were Obama supporters. Another 5% were on the fence. I didn't get one Clinton supporter. Everyone else was Republican or anti-government altogether.

4. When people were really mean, I was tempted to mark them as "deceased."

5. One person on the list was actually deceased. Recently. The old woman who answered was really upset in telling me this. I felt so awful and gave her my condolences. I didn't have the heart to ask her to vote for someone. I just told her I was a volunteer for the Obama campaign and gave her my sympathies and asked if she was okay.

6. People with "old lady" names like Eunice, Myrtle, and Polly, tend to be old ladies. And nice.

7. One guy kept calling me "Ma'am." I just went with it.

8. A lot of people had already voted. But Texas has a fucked up primary system. They can (and should) vote AGAIN at their caucus. The caucuses, which happen immediately after the polls close tomorrow, will appoint about 1/3 of the state's total delegates. I guess it was designed to encourage people to get more involved with the party. But it's gonna be a big old mess that probably won't last for long after this.

9. I was tempted to do different voices and accents, but there were just too many angry people answering the phones. So I stuck to myself, only 10 times more polite.

10. If you live in Texas, Ohio, Rhode Island, or Vermont, GO VOTE TOMORROW! Even it it's not for my candidate.



While I support Barack, I like me some Hillary too. I'm quite happy that she's still in the race. Unlike some of my fellow supporters, I don't want her to pull out early.

I think both of them out there campaigning is a FANTASTIC thing in terms of national discussion of the issues. People are arguing over which Universal Health plan is better, who can fight the recession, who's more against NAFTA, who can better fight global warming, and who will end the war in Iraq more effeciently.

And the press is covering it.

Both of their arguments and proposed solutions are getting a lot of media attention. For the first time in YEARS these issues are being recognized as -- well -- issues!

Once the Democratic nominee is settled, the arguments will revert to whether or not we should even HAVE health care for all... whether or not we're even IN a recession.... just how good NAFTA IS... whether or not global warming even EXISTS... and labeling those opposed to the Iraq war as pro-terror.

So for now, I'm enjoying this. We've finally gotten rid of the Bush-tinted glasses and people are seeing that these problems actually exist. And they're thinking about them. And they're doing something about it.
9:50 PM 
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February 24, 2008 - Sunday 


As some of you know, I write an occasional column in the awesome national LGBT magazine THE ADVOCATE called "Hell in a Handbasket." The newest one is out on shelves now with a cover featuring Heath Ledger (sign of the cross). My column is on the back page (great spot!). It's called "My Fake Boyfriend." It's a true story about the coolest, hottest, funniest, smartest fake guy I ever dated. Check it out!

And if any of you have ever met/talked to this guy, I wanna hear all about it.

If The Advocate isn't available at your local newsstand or bookstore, ask them to carry it. Or you can read it online here.
3:00 AM 
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February 16, 2008 - Saturday 


My fabulous producing partner Lance scored us comp tickets for "Barry Manilow: An Evening of Music and Passion" at the Staples Center on Valentine's Day. I'm not a... whatever the Barry Manilow version of a Clay-mate is... but how could I to pass up the chance to see something for free that thousands of people are willing to spend $225.00 a ticket on?

It was a memorable night! The place was packed but I was the youngest one there. And I'm not even close to young. It was largely middle-aged straight couples. Some felt like reluctant Valentine gifts from husbands, but for most part the men were equally (sometimes more) excited, rockin' out with their glowsticks.

The rest of the crowd was gays... and they were all in my section. I even ran into a number of people I knew.

I didn't recognize most of the songs, but the ones I did know made me smile. And Barry has a pretty awesome voice, he belted out big time. I definitely recommend checking him out if you ever get the opportunity. I really enjoyed watching this massive crowd of fiftysomethings throw down to adult contemporary in a giant arena, like it was Britney or Kanye.

We went to the backstage VIP after party and the food was good. But we left before Barry got there. It had been a long day.

For vjayvjay day itself, I actually had a date with a very nice (and cute) gentleman. It was a lunch date because he had to work in the evening. For the first time in years, the holiday didn't suck. I hope the same was true all of you!



Concert or enormous PTA meeting? It's all the baby boomers.


Glow sticks. Or Mani-glow sticks.


Baby boomers with glow sticks.


Okay, there was at least one person younger than me. She was adorable and worked those glowsticks all night.


His piano was on a platform that went up and down sometimes.


He sang the theme to "American Bandstand" to Dick Clark, who was in the audience.


"Can't Smile Without You" got the crowd singing. It was strange, during this song I suddenly got the feeling YES WE CAN get Obama elected.


He performed "Mandy" as a duet with his 32-year younger self on a video screen behind him.


Don'tcha want a sparkly blue blazer now? Clear pictures of his face were REALLY hard to get because he was so overlit with the spotlight. I think this was on purpose. I snapped this and the top picture at moments when he accidentally stepped out of it.


Her name was Lola. She was a showgirl or something.


"Copacabana" got the wildest reaction from the crowd.



Some of his movements were almost Pee Wee Herman-like, in a good way. Like he's really genuinely excited to be performing. How could you not love it?


The big finale of streamers and a confetti storm, just like Mika.








With my buddies Jason and Del at the after party. Wait, let me say their whole names Jason Dottley and Del Shores (there, did you get your Google alerts, guys?)

12:59 AM 
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February 13, 2008 - Wednesday 



Last night Drew and I went to see Mika perform at the Wiltern. I missed his show last year, so I'm glad he brought the tour back through LA. And boy, can that boy put on a show. With that voice and those theatrics, it was like Queen but with a lot of bubblegum. And I love bubblegum.

I'm not the only one who loved it. The place was full of little girls. I'm not talking teenage high school girls. Not even tweens. LITTLE girls, like 7-11 year olds. Mixed in with gay men in their 30s. Looking at the crowd, you'd think it was Miley Cyrus performing with the Pet Shop Boys.



Drew and I towered above the fans around us. He is 6'4". Here we are ducking down for a picture.


As they prepared for the show, keeping us entertained was a screen full of ads. You could send text messages to it and it'd display your text at the bottom. There were a lot of pro-Obama and pro-Hillary texts. Obama seemed to get more of a reaction from the crowd. I love that the political process is exciting people in this country. Some of my favorite texts were: "Everyone over 30 should leave!" "MIKA/OBAMA 08" and "I told my parents I was going to the library." I sent a text reading: "Scream if you thought the opening act was boring." Everyone screamed. They were. I guess that's kind of evil.




During "Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)" a giant inflatable "big girl" popped up behind him.


Then some "big girl" back up dancers came out and they WERE beautiful.


The most awesome big girl did back flips and I tried to get a picture of her doing a head spin, but it came out a bit blurry.




He's kind of adorable.






He did a lot of jumping around. Here's a midair shot.






Some shirtless jumping. I swear, my voice was sore and my body ached just from standing there watching and screaming. I can't imagine doing his performance every night.


"Love Today" drum solo on garbage cans.




I have to say it was the best encore I have ever seen in a concert. He came back and did "Lollipop." And it left you feeling very very very satisfied.








An energetic screaming crowd in Los Angeles! I wonder if Mika knows how rare that is.


Confetti fell for the last half of the song, then was topped off by an obscene avalanche of streamers. It was impossible not to have a big goofy smile.




Here's one of the fans to give you an idea of the age range. Seriously. I love that little girls are singing along to "Billy Brown" and "Big Girl You Are Beautiful." How great to grow up with songs like that out there.
2:06 AM 
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