I just thought this is funny and wanted to share it with ya guys ;)
If everyone learned about sex through porn (and ONLY porn) they would think that all this is normal while having sex (haha):
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All women wear REALLY high heels in bed.
No men are impotent.
10 seconds is enough when you go down on a woman. No need to do it more than that.
If a woman is "suprised" by a stranger (maybe the pizza guy or the plumber) while mastubating she doesn't scream or get ambarassed. She invites him to take part insted....
Women smile gratefully when men cum in their face. Because every woman LOVES that.
Women enjoy having sex with ugly, harry, old men
Women moan really load when they're giving blowjobs.
Men and women always cum simultaneously.
A woman can get out of a speeding-ticket if she just offers the cop oral (even female cops!)
There's no such thing as fake boobs... they were all just born that way. And no women have small breasts.
Men enjoy "dick-slapping" women in the face. And women love it too.
All men moan "Ohh yeah baby" when they cum..
It makes women smile if they have something in each "hole".
There's no such thing as Asian men.
If a guy surprises a couple going at it in a forrest, the boyfriend won't mind if you go up a put your d*ck in the mouth of his girlfriend while he's doing her from behind. And the girl won't mind at all either!
Nurses always have REALLY big boobs and they give the patients blowjobs all the time.
If you get caught doing your girlfriends best friend, your girlfriend will only get mad for a few minutes and then she'll just join in.
Women never have a headache or their period!
When a woman gives a guy a blowjob it's REALLY important for the guy to keep reminding the woman what to do... like saying "Suck it".
As*holes are ALWAYS clean...
Anal sex is always really enjoyable for the female.
Women always looks pleasantly surprised when they open a guys pants and find a half-hard penis.
Men don't have to beg to get sex (even the fat, ugly, hairy, old ones).
All men have really big penises and they can always control when to cum.
All women are both into men and other women. |
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 | Currently listening:
Blackout
By Britney Spears
Release date: 30 October, 2007 |
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