I'm gonna fly to the top to a place where you can't spot me,

Theses are the memoirs of a broken man,
of what he wants and what he can't have,
how destitute he is and how much he ran,
for you and for me,
just so we can get close and be,
something great, not nefarious,
andit keeps daring us to go on.
To live, to love to go strong.
To do this shit the best we can,
how long we stay together,
which might not be forever,
but I'll sure as hell try, but I can't deny
everything good must come to an end,
so why even try?
Dry up your tears and put away your fears,
cause I'll be here for you,
everyday and I'll say the thing that get yer heart,
movin, bumpin, pumpin, swayin.
The things that get you on your knees and start praying.
Dear & Close.

My love is put in these lines,
every ounce of my being put into these
so please don't make a mockery or
even try stoppin me from sayin what I need to,
no disrespect,
this shits comin from my heart,
so what do you expect?
Cuz I'm sure as hell sore and in all the time your gone
the pain grows more.
And I'm pretty sure that the burnin hot desire is dieing
like a coal, a flicker of a flame,
but I guess love's the name of the game.
And everything that I'm sayin,
is like nails on a chalkboard,
you need to be stayin,
close to me, so I can hear,
what you whisper in my ear.
Have no fear because I'm right here.
Dear & Close.

My love is burning like a structure fire,
What else do you want, how can I fill your desire?
What do you need? Is it me? Can I possible be the
one that you want,
the one that you need to see?
Is it?
You gotta let me know, so I can stay close,
to you at least...or is it at most?
Am I see through like a ghost?
Cuz I feel empty like Casper, and
it's your love I want to capture.
The rapture is growing in me,
but very soon you'll see, that one day
some how, some way I'll get you to stay.
Dear & Close.
Like a ghost, you move through me,
and how can I truly see, what's clear and what isn't?
This shit's pointless, givin it up and sayin my all isn't enough.
Tryin to find the light, but it's too small.
Should I have even tried at all?
Dear & Close.

In these lines is my life personified,
what I love and how I could die for
someone like you, a precious girl and a freak too.
Someone with the mind who isn't heartless all the time, but pardon this next line,
I don't give a fuck, so long and good luck,
Dear & Close.
You're near, but not here, can't you see
The things you do that kill me?
Burnin inside like someone lit a match.
HAH! I always knew you were a catch,
but catch this,
something quick.
I love you.
Dear & Close.

(It's not quite finished yet, but I think I got something goin for a rap song.)

A blackbird sings, tell me, are you listening?

You turn to walk away, but I grab your hand.

Don't you know I'm your man?

Can't you see I've given you my all, for all that I am?

Your view is so one-sided, but why must we be divided?

How can you hate love if you haven't tried it?

 

A blackbird sings, but you're not listening.

I can still hear your last words ringing.

I feel my heart tear, it's stinging.

I'm sorry, but I can't help this feeling.

But I'll let you know something true...

 

I love you.

 

I've given you my all, but I guess that wasn't enough.

I've been through love before, but none this rough.

I've given you my love, I've shown you what's pure,

I suppose it's love's pain I'll have to endure.

It's those last words you said, those last four.

 

I'll have to get a clue,

Just to get over you.

Those last words you said,

Constantly run through my head.

 

I don't love you...

...But I do...

 

by Paul Chalker.

There's this girl that I know,

and her eyes sure do glow,

and like the moon they do shine,

and I want her to be mine.

 

When I get that feeling inside,

I know there's nothing I can hide,

if there's one thing that I know,

it's that her eyes they sure do glow.

 

She's a beauty to me.

 

Everyday I wait to see,

if she'll even look at me,

and everytime I look away,

I always say there's another day.

 

When I look deep into her eyes,

I get these butterflies inside,

and when our eyes happen to meet,

I feel my hear skip a beat.

 

She's a beauty to me.

 

There's this girl that I like,

and she keeps me up at night,

'cause I look up to the stars,

to know that she's not very far.

 

And if you were to see her,

you would quicly realize,

just why I can't stop staring in her eyes.

 

She's a beauty to me.

 

by Paul Chalker

This way my friends!
To a land that isn't there and that doesn't begin!
To a land where one is fat and one it thin,
where one is calm and one is livid.
But for eternal bliss. You will never live.
Because this God doesn't forgive.
And just like you. He's flawed too.
So yeah, pop that shit, take a hit. Never forget, that he's just like you.
So back up, get down, get funky, clown around.
Cuz just like your friends. God's fake too.

Every now and then I look at life through an introspective stance; putting thoughts in my head (not suicidal). Thoughts about what my life is like, trying to make my life seem like a sitcom, or really bad movie. Yeah. That's what I do.

Well. The usually I think about stuff. Silly stuff. Nothing in particular. Just random crap, anything that pops into my head at the moment. Unlike most people who blog about life, I don't say its just a rat race; pointless. No. See. I like to think of this world as surreal. Which it really is, I mean, look at the human body; penis in particular. Yeah. Life's like that...or maybe like an orgasm. Short. Sweet. Maybe rough.

There were times in my life where I felt hopeless. Then. I remembered that I have a clone and that I can just live forever by implanting my conciousness into him. He's buff. Can't wait to try him out in about 100 years. It'll be fun.

Sometimes. I sit on my bed and I grab my fifty dollar acoustic guitar I won at a band auction and I dilly dally around on it. I find myself sitting there for about an hour singing and playing, then, I realize that my stuffed animals all left the room.

Yesterday, I had my girlfriend stay the night. My parents were drunk and didn't remember that they said she could stay over, I'm grounded.

I like to go for walks a lot. I think about what my life would be like if I had never moved to this side of town. How different I would be. I like to think that if I never moved that I would be a druggy. Good thing I'm not.

Life is short, yes, I realize this, but I'm not going to do drugs. So stop asking. And no I don't smoke pot. Not my cup-o-tea. To me, marijuana is an expensive past time, and quite frankly, I don't have any money.

Yeah, yeah, I know. This is just random jibber jabber, I don't know why you'd read this. But, I felt the urge to purge thoughts on this.."digital paper". So if you read this, thanks. Doubt many of you will.

What happened to music? I'll tell you what happened. Time happened. I can't stand how people divide themselves from other by what music they listen to, really, I can't. It truly bothers me that someone who wont segregate a school by their race would easily do it, UNCONCIOUSLY I might add, by what music the other person listens to...Fuck cliques.

Why is it we all long to be popular? I don't know, maybe we all want to be loved by everyone...so does that make you gay? I guess. Fuck... how do I tell my girlfriend?

Hmmmm, I meant for this to be a meaningful testament on life, but I guess its a meaningless diatrob of crappy jokes. I'm not trying to be funny. Fuck. I suck. Ok well...

Once. I bit through my tongue.