Here's how it works: Someone writes a blog with seven weird/random facts about him/herself. Then, at the end of the blog, he/she tags seven people by listing their names. These people then need to write their own blogs with seven facts about themselves and these rules stated clearly. It is also required that you leave a comment on the new tag-ees pages, telling them they have been tagged and that they should read your blog.

Facts:

1. I once at 12 pieces of Kentucky Fried Chicken, which made me so sick that I could feel chicken grease coming out of my pores for the next year. I didn't eat KFC again for almost 5 years. And worse yet - that was a contest, and I LOST to my friend G who ate 16 pieces.
2. I once appeared in a cameo role in a gay sci fi movie as a crack ho. And I did my own makeup. I know crack ho.
3. I have a tattoo of the Pittsburgh Steelers logo.
4. I always make a Christmas craft project for all my friends. One year that meant that I hand-made 112 candles shaped like tiny cats.
5. I once paid $150 to get a collectors edition Zelda disc on ebay. ISSUES.
6. I collect vintage rings. I'm looking for the ultra rare yellow lindy stone if you know of one.
7. My first name is derived from the french word for "happy." My middle name (Nissa) means friendly elf or fairy. I'm a happy little fairy elf. Yep.

Tagging: Pdg (beause he'll do something awful with this), A-Train (for pretty much the same reason), Deanna (cause fun girl, fun answers, Jeff (cause I want to know more for future ammo), Candy (cause fun girl, fun answers), Leslie (because I'm curious and she seems to have a full life), Ashley (because she probably needs schoolwork distraction)

Because I can't post three hundred places! http://www.ILovePaulJack.com Named for one of my favorite gay boys. Sigh. enjoy.

Thursday, June 02, 2005 Oh Thank Christ. Current mood: so aggitated Oh thank Christ my largest client has discovered the joy of forced employee blogging. I can't tell you how empty my life was before I was forced to spend thirty minutes of my day each day BLOGGING ABOUT WORK. I mean, at least that's billable, but nonetheless. And, on top of that, I'm supposed to be keeping, wait for it, not one but TWO separate blogs for them. YES! Did you know that there is a need for a separate project blog and also a best practices blog? And my project blog is required to have an up-to-date summary of everything I'm handling in the top entry. Do you want my life? Here's a scintillating example with incriminating client crap removed: 1. Hiring of Marketing Tech Manager: Awaiting emails back on phone interview times 2. P4C: Addition of affiliate targets, sample email template, assistance with completion of interface 3. B-List Headline Placement Test: Development of Testing templates, daily tracking over 14-21 day period. 4. Completion of May Acquisition Report 5. Postcard Application: Finalize technological completion and assign PM Doc to Ry and Matt 6. Auto page updating Script: When things quiet down, have script implemented. 7. Corporate Site Redo: After PM Meeting, complete copy and design specs to send out 8. SB Specific Conversion Pages: Awaiting comps from Shannyn 9. New Master Confirmation Page: Awaiting Test from Mike 10. New Card Project : Awaiting content and coded product from Ry/Mike 11. New Info Project: Awaiting content 12. Master report redesign: Awaiting content from RJ Thank GOD I now get to spend 10 minutes EVERY SINGLE DAY making sure that's up to date. Whatever would I do with that valuable 10 minutes otherwise? Oh, wait, I may in fact use that ten minutes to update my OTHER client required blog, which includes such amzingly hard-to-grasp best practices concepts as: * Increasing the spending cap and cost per impression will temporarily reduce your CPA on a contextual campaign, but be prepared for it to skyrocket within days of doing that. * Complex landing pages (like the standard landing page) will fail miserably in a contextual campaign. Stick to the simple message, large headline landing pages. I mean, is this necessary? Said client acounts for a solid 30% of my income right now. Said client is also the client that's making it impossible for me to move back east. If said client doesn't make me stop doing ASS STUPID things like taking up half an hour of my day each day to BLOG FOR CHRISTSAKE, I'll take the finanacial hit and hopskiip my ass back to Pennsylvania. OHMYGOD. You see that this blog will turn into a venting area. Fun times.

Says my client, "Go set yourself up in MySpace like you really wanted to."

Says me, "I can totally research that without having to create an account. One community site is just like another."

Says my client, "Nope."

Advance ten or so hours to 2:30am in the morning when I am going through this nonsense while Jason drinks my beer.

Me: This is absurd. Do I really need to set up a blog? I already have a blog. I have two, actually, the public one and the private one. I mean, really, what will I do with another blog?

Jason: Do you have to, like, do it, do it?

Me: Yes, for, like, a month.

Jason: Make it a theme blog.

Me: Oh, please don't turn me into a theme blogger. My self-esteem is low enough already.

Jason: A workout blog?

Me: Lame.

Jason: A food blog?

Me: Lame.

Jason: A poem blog?

Me: So.Lame.

Jason: A blog in which you talk about nothing but your quest to find a man?

Me: Done that already.

Jason: An angry grrrrrl blog?

Me: Too old to pull that off.

Jason:  I have it!

Me: Yes?

Jason: An insomnia blog. You never sleep anyway.

So that is what we will do here, at least until I don't have to do this anymore. I try to make it a rule to not write in the middle of the night in the abyss of insomnia, but we will do that here. It'll be fun. The completely crazy, neurotic, insane, uncontrollable stuff that runs through my head at night? That's, you know, not that interesting. Enjoy.