You know, we have a lot of really cool friends on this little website.

Both guys and gals of all ages and backgrounds.
While we're at it, I'll be the first to admit that MySpace has a lot of fine young ladies who post beautiful pics of themselves on their pages.
And really, God bless them for doing so. There are some righteous, babe-a-licious, little hot cakes out there and they need to work what the good Lord gave 'em.

BUT (You knew this was coming).

My problem is with a certain type of MySpace lady. The kind that qualifies their pics.

"If you think I'm a slut because of my pics, then you are too ignorant to be my friend...just because I am bent over my fireplace in fishnets showing you my thong and looking back ay the camera longingly does not mean that I am sexual in nature or even know how to do sex. So there."

Puh-leaze, you really can't expect to post pics 16 pictures of your ass in various positions of allure and not expect 3,000 dudes saying shit like:

"Dam, girl u thick...how you getz it so sexy?"

The classy gent that spoke these magical seductive words just happened to be a 12 year old white farm kid from Glenwood.

Don't take this the wrong way, my kittens. Jeesh, already....

This drives us up the freaking wall...

The word "cute" cannot be used to describe certain things when we know damn well that what you mean to say is something totally different.

Belly button rings are not "cute"...they are sexy. If you say that a belly button ring looks "cute" it is because you do not want to admit that you want to look sexy...and you do.

Tattoos are not "cute" either...if you have one on the small of your back, your breasts, or close to your other nether regions, it is not "cute"...it is sexy. Unless it is of a baby unicorn dancing in a rainbow. And then it is just stupid.

Panties, bras, garters and other under garments are never "cute"...they are extremely sexy. You say "cute" but you mean "hot".

Revealing clothing of any kind is not "cute"...it is damn sexy, especially if it looks good on you. If it doesn't look good on you, it is still not cute...it is embarrasing.

I was watching Dr. 90210 and this 17 year old girl was getting a boob job...post -operation, they were doing the follow-up and interviewed this young lady who was obviously thrilled about her new look. The first thing she said was "I'm really happy with the results...my new boobs are really cute".

NO, THEY ARE NOT CUTE! They are something for boys to play with...they are sexual objects that aid in attracting men to you and also play a small role in the feeding of your babies.

Babies are cute. Kittens are cute. Elementary school plays are cute. The things listed above are sexy...it's okay to say it. No one will think that you are a slut because you want to look sexy.

Please start being honest with yourselves and others, including your fellow females.

And quit bastardizing the word "cute"...it's a cool word that doesn't have anything to do with your fake boobs.

BTW, real boobs are always better, regardless of size.

Thanks,

the smileys

Running through these pages, I see a lot of pics of dudes with their shirts pulled half-way up showing their abs.

Other than the obvious reason, for the life of me I cannot understand why these dudes would do this...I have abs, too. But they are covered by a small layer of fat. But even if I did have a "six-pack" I highly doubt that I would ever post a pic of them...especially with my shirt pulled half-way up. I believe that this is a desperate cry for help. It's like saying "I have nothing else to offer but my sweet abs...please comment on them because I work very hard to get this definition you see here".

The guys in the band are going to do a shirtless shot soon...we will post it ASAP, ladies...don't get all uptight.

I know this now...

Please check back from time to time as various members of the band pontificate over the day's events.

Thanks and God Bless...

the smileys (a.k.a. the "freakin'" smileys)