I am freezing, always freezing on the bus. It is kept “meat locker” cold in here.  Flannel shirt, scarf and hat are not quite enough to keep the frost off of me. Why? I don’t know, it’s how the headliner rolls. Maybe she’s fighting germs; maybe she’s fighting menopause. Either way, it’s about to snow in here.

We are speeding on our way to Jamestown NY, and looking out the window – it’s green trees as far as the eye can see. I guess we are in Ohio.  Up in the corner is a large flat screen TV telling me about taxes and the Taliban, troops in Afganistan…and my thoughts make a B-Line for my brother. He’s in the reserves now after spending his active duty being a combat rescue pilot for the Airforce. He says it looks like he’s headed to Afganistan this year, and I hate that, purely for selfish reasons.

I grew up the baby of the family, with no shortage of rivalry from my brother. Oh, did he punk on me.  I ran from him in high school, endured him in college, and now he’s pretty much the most important person in my life. He’s ALWAYS there for me with every celebration, with every heart break, he picks up the phone and has seemingly unending time for me.  It always surprises me how right he is about my creativity and my growth. 

He and I were pretty much a Phoenix out of the flames story, so don’t think we are just great friends by the luck of the draw. A few years ago, after a family reunion, we were so mad at each other, he said he needed six months before he was going to talk to me again!  We both made mistakes, but I vowed to myself (and him if he was listening) to be a better sister. It takes a lot of effort. Countless hours driving to whatever Holiday he wants me to show up for, or spending hundreds of dollars to get there and sleeping on a couch for a week in a freezing house.  Sometimes I’ll fill his fridge with groceries, or clean his house or whatever. But it’s no major sacrifice, it’s what helps us to help us build our relationship, and he’s worth it. I’m there for him as much as I can be, and he’s there for me. Family is worth it. He does so much for me and our family, it’s phenomenally giving of him. He does everything from cleaning out the old family house, to doing the taxes for years, dealing with the nursing home and insurance and so much more. The way he takes care of our Dad is above and beyond angelic.

When we were kids at odds with each other, our Dad used to say “someday your siblings will be your best friends.” I thought he was nuts. Now I’d go nuts if I didn’t have my brother.  I’m really proud of him, oh, and did I mention he’s also a Lawyer? Yeah, I pretty much won the lottery in brothers. Thanks God.

Here’s a learning curve for ya-

A few weeks ago, I get a phone call with a bad connection from a well known comic. He asks if I got his previous message. No. Asks if I’m available in a few weeks to be a part of a 5 camera shoot in Myrtle Beach, 15 min set, to be a part of the “new Christian Comics” thing, and to call him back later. It doesn’t pay, but the exposure could be mega worth it. Are you kidding me?  You had me at 5 cameras.

So I cancel some club work I had booked for that weekend. When I call him back, the connection is even worse. He’s in Nebraska he says, and all I can picture is him out on some windswept field with horses and mountains in the distance. Likely I am confusing Nebraska with Montana. Likely he’s in a windy Wallmart parking lot.

A week later I send my flight info’ and haven’t heard from him since…flash forward and now I’m getting dropped off at the airport. A friend asks “who’s picking you up?” I don’t know. “Is someone picking you up?” I think so. “Where are you staying?” I don’t know.  The gig comes with a room…but I don’t know where. “Where is the gig? What’s the name of the venue?” Uh…I’m starting to sound and feel pretty stupid by now. I’m going on faith that this comic from Nebraska has this all ironed out…

And as I’m boarding my second plane of the day, I get a semi-frantic phone call from another comic booked on this gig. He lost his wallet at the airport, just landed in Myrtle Beach, and says “there’s no one here!” He’s tried to call Mr. Nebraska 20 times (but never left a message, don’t ask me why.) “I got nothing! No money! No people! No directions! I got nuthin’! I’m never this stupid!!!”

I’m never this stupid either; I mean I’m pretty “fly by the seat of my pants” but this is really… wait a minute. Yes, I am. There was the time I showed up in Prague at night with nothing but a name and description of a guy, who found a room for my other American friends, 6 months ago. Leon, bald with a brown leather jacket. And sure enough, there he was.

Maybe my fellow comic will have it all ironed out by the time I get there, and if not, I’m taking the bus to the nearest beach for a sunset dip in Mother Ocean. Flying by the seat of your pants ain’t so bad, if your seat ends up on a sandy beach. After all, what’s life without a little adventure?

Allright Ashville - who wants to crack up their Dad for Father's Day?
I've got a great bonding experience for you and the old geezer - take him to a Chonda show! I'll give you a money back *guarentee if that man doesn't turn red with laughter. I know, I know, a LOT of people think Chonda shows are just for women only - right - and donuts are only for when you are hungry. Not!
Does your Dad snore, got hair popping out of his ears and think he's a silver fox? Yeah, then this show is for the two of you. But honestly, time is short and there will be  time when you wish you could spend time with the ones you love, laughing and enjoying life. Carpe Diem and Carpe a ticket to the Chonda show in Ashville on June 19th.

*not really ;)

www.zancomedy.com
www.chonda.org
www.thejoyfm.com

Dudes.
I know what you are thinking -
Christian Comedy?
Isn't that an oxymoron?
Look, you know me, you know I'm not going to tell you something that isn't true.
Chonda Pierce, the President of the Christian Comedy Association is a creative genius.
You don't believe me? She just had another DVD go Platinum. But don't believe all those people that bought it - believe me when I tell you she's like the Elvis of Clean Comedy with a purpose.
Look - I know the word "Christian" is a loaded word. Everyone makes all kinds of assumptions when you hear that word.
Please do yourself a favor and put down your assumptions for 2 days and just come and learn about the business and creative process of the thing you love - stand-up comedy.
This year's conference has amazing people -
Martha Bolton wrote for BOB HOPE for something like 12 years!
And no, she isn't ancient.
She's actually hot. And totally astute. I'm not - I don't even know how to spell the word. She listened to me over one meal and gave me some great advice that has taken me to a whole new level.
Last thing I asked her was "what would you have done differently?"
She said "I would have written more scripts. I would have produced more work."
But it didn't matter for her because she wrote for TV for her whole career and she always had plenty of work.
So take her advice if you love what you do and DO MORE WORK. PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE YOUR MOUTH IS. GO TO THE CONFERENCE TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO MORE WORK.
OK. I'm done with this for now.
C U There.
one last thing - cough up $75 and play hooky for 2 days if you believe in yourself.
www.christiancomedyassociation.com

Some of the people in the comedy world around me get on stage and talk about how they don’t believe in God. So I got on stage and started doing the opposite. Now I do jokes about how I got Baptized as an adult, in a 2,000 seat all African American Baptist church.  There was me, and about 20 little 5 year olds with their hair in braids…and me. I fit right in. Right – I’ve never fit in, I’m a comic. All comics come from the Island of Misfit Toys.  Anyway, I talk about a few embarrassing moments, and then I end with mentioning how for three days afterwards I was filled with the lightest, brightest, clearest, blissful energy. Call it the Holy Ghost or Spirit or whatever, but it happened.   Didn’t expect it. But there it was. That’s my personal experience, and how can you deny your pwn personal experience? Years later I read that bit in the Bible about how if you ask Jesus into your heart, you'll be filled with the Holy Spirit - and I was like- that happened to me. Wow. That's true.

 I asked a comedian friend yesterday if he had ever even tried to connect with God, on a personal level. He said not really. I venture to guess that’s the case with a lot of people, that they deny the existence of God, without ever having spent some time investigating the personal experience for themselves, not from a book, but from experience.  I’d ask that you give it a shot, before you say something isn’t true. Forget about all the judgments that you might have against the word "Christianity" and just maybe think about that part about God's light being inside of you. God doesn't have to be "way out there" or filled with all the stuff that you didn't like from your childhood. God can be as close to you as you want Him to be. That's my experience. I meditate a lot. That's how I started on my spiritual journey about 10 years ago. And I think there's a lot of truth in "Be still and know that I am God."

It's worth a shot; what do you have to lose?