J.Baxter 16/04/09
Inbox 404- Lessons in Love
 
Text message,
Text message,
Text message,
No response.
Evil text message,
Angry response.
 
Nothing for days.
 
Text message,
Text message,
Sympathy text message,
Compassionate response,
No response.
 
Later that night.
 
Confused about our love text message.
 
Can't sleep again,
Sheer frustration building up.
Next morning.
 
Upset and and angry about rejection text message,
Text message,
Text message,
Gonna top myself text message.
 
On and on and on forever text, maybe kiss and make up before naughty picture text.
 
...love, marriage and break ups on any network at any time,
even mine. I HATE IT.

Internal Storms And Norms (J. Baxter 09/06/07)

Anger! Anger! Anger!

Kinda builds up.

Why can't i speak? Why wont nobody listen?

Because they don't care, get over it. 

But why?

Your not important.

But i am human, i have feelings!!!

I would say kill yourself but your already dead.

I have rights! People do love me!

You have nothing, people only care because of accepted social norms within a culture or society as a whole, a kind of forced emotion, to be polite only.

But my life? I can do what i want, i am not controlled!

Your life is written, fit in or get out! What your eyes see is only the darkness, open them wide, we follow, our god is called 'Normality'.

Well i think your not normal!

I think.

Your crazy, you need locking up, you need a docter!

We are already locked up, 'Money', another god binds us. My docter does not care.

Stop! Stop! your messing my mind, your sick! Sick!

From day one you are controlled, your mind is already messed, you need to unscramble it. I know i am sick, sick with every single thing i see. Now you go have a nice day, summer is here JS X

On This Lonely Road(J. Baxter 28/05/07)

Broken shadows in despair (on the lonely road)

Whiskey drinking anywhere (on the lonely road)

Making friends with Mother Earth (on the lonely road)

Aint got me no cares, No aint got me no cares

Fixing me another life (on the lonely road)

Beer drinking through this strife (on the lonely road)

Forget all these awful sights (on the lonely road)

Need myself a (good) wife, yeh need myself a wife

Moving fast, now up a gear (on the lonely road)

Wine always takes away my fear (on the lonely road)

Crashing waves, away i steer (on the lonely road)

New lands are always here

Oh its on this lonely road

My life is never owned

Killing anything in  sight (lonely)

Drugged and loaded, full of fright (lonely)

Can't tell if its day or night (lonely)

Life destroys us all, life destroys us all.............

Regular Joe (J.Baxter 05/05/07)

I'm a regular joe, and i walk alone

Always feeling undone, and i can't let go

Oh so frozen in time, now my mind is dry

With my head on the chopping board, thinking lies

I'm a regular guy, no i can't deny

My problems, all wrapped up in my lonely time

One day i'll be gone, jus like everyone

And forgotten, just like this sorrowed song

(Regular joe, oh where do you go?)

(Now you let your baby go)

(No turning back for a drunken man)

(Just looking for a home)

I'm a regular drunk, and all head shrunk

Always falling home, sometimes they hang on

The job always done, my heart stolen

And i remember who i am

Yeh, I'm that regular joe, my heart all made of stone

Selfish as the day is long, as short, and now i don't belong

One day i'll maybe find someone, and fall out of love again

I know now that i am damned, to be all lonesome

Dangers Door (J. Baxter 09/04/07)

Im the song when your all alone

Incomplete and lonely, oh

And i promise you will never go down again

I'm the man who saw it all

Kept a knocking on the danger door

And i know, i would do it all again

(When the world turns upside down)

(When our feet cannot touch the ground)

(When our hearts are being drowned)

I'm the illness that will not go

Keep the pain inside your soul

And God still hates us all, my friend

I'm the child, know i'm always free

Wanting youth to stay within me

And adults, they always upset my world 

To some i am the heart and soul of the party, to others i am a hyperactive pain in the bum. The older i get the more this boggles me. People grow up and do grown up things, hang in clique's throughout and generally forget anything they ever believed in. I often wonder if the world is wrong or me, and why i am such a loner! It is strange because although i know many people and i am sociable and friendly to be around, i dont allow many close to me. I play the clown but i observe reaction and normality scare's me. People think i'm crazy but i see crazy people all the time, on the bus, in the streets. They do their thing waiting to explode, it scares me. I find guys dont understand me and girls use me, (poor me but why aint they any real girls who want a boyfriend?) nice guys loose and opinion on anything more than bands and fashion don't fit the rock scene no more. Chav-core i reckon, nasty personalities within a music of world changing politics, fuck back off to your trackies pricks!!! Everybody uses one another to gain something but i get the impression they dont know what they want to gain. Guess everybody is lonely, thats why Myspace is SO popular. suppose people are as scared as me but not willing to do anything about it. The world aint designed for freedom and fun, just lyers and cheats. Wish more of you could see that simple is easier, being nice is easier, and life can end quickly. People say i am miserable?, an alcoholic? and a druggy?, people judge don't they? before they think. Why are you unhappy? Did you think that far? Maybe you should, a bit more love makes this ride just a little more bearable. X :) peace out..........