So my dog Sasha and I were talking a couple days ago and she informed me that she feels the time is right to make her mark on the world wide web. Apparently she is no longer content to live her life in obscurity. I never realized she had a desire for fame but then again I never thought to ask her. The subject just never came up.

Anyway, she started talking about marketing, networking, business models, incorporation, and a bunch of other stuff I didn't really understand. Apparently she's given this a lot of thought. That's when I suggested that she begin her web presence with a MySpace profile. I helped her create an account and showed her how to edit her profile. She got it set up how she likes it now, added some pictures, and uploaded a video. She types amazingly well considering she has paws and all. In fact she averages twice the words per minute that I do. It's really amazing.

Unfortunately though, she's been sitting in front of my computer for the last 2 days waiting for people to add her. Every time I ask her if I can get on the computer she snarls and barks at me. That's why I'd like to ask you all a favor. If it wouldn't be too much trouble could you please drop by her profile at myspace.com/grumpylittleprincess and drop her a friend request and maybe leave her a comment. She's really become obsessed with the whole MySpace thing and I'd really like to use my computer again. She says I'm not getting it back until she goes viral.

Anyway, she's kicking me off the computer now so I have to go (she's scaring me.) I'd really appreciate any help you guys could give me. Thanks.

I'm sure you've all seen the note from Tom about Profile 2.0 by now. Tom claims if you don't like it you can switch back the the original profile design. Before you decide to check it out for yourself I should warn you that I was not able to restore my profile back to the original design after converting. It's probably just an early bug, but it did jack up my content a bit and it took me about two hours to get things looking right on the unfamiliar new layout.

If you haven't seen what the Profile 2.0 layout looks like yet check out my profile. Make sure you like it before you convert because, for now at least, there is no going back. With that being said, I'll tell you what I like and dislike about it.

Likes: I like the way they opened up the Interests column and the way they widened the right side column. It's a much more efficient use of space in that regard. I also like the way they combined the contact box with the box that holds your name, age, location, default pic, headline, etc. The Extended Network box is finally gone now too. That thing was always a waste of space. You can drag and drop different sections (Interests, Blurbs, Details, etc.) where you want them now too. The only one you can't move is one with your name, default pic, and contact links- it stays at the top. You also have a lot more control over what sections are visible and exactly what content appears in them without having to hunt down a code from a 3rd party site. The last thing that I really like is that they made the number of friend comments adjustable- don't want 50 comments showing anymore? Now you can adjust that if you want.

Dislikes: Only a couple complaints really. First, you can no longer use HTML tags to alter text withing the different sections, meaning you can no longer justify text or use italics or bold text. You can still add hyperlinks and break tags but that's pretty much it. Hopefully they will fix that soon. The other thing I don't like is that editing your profile now seems a little more complicated. Like I said, it took me two hours to fix everything after I converted. That may not be be a major issue after people become more familiar with the new customizing features, but I've already seen several bulletins from people that were lost.

Anyway, I'm sure this is by no means a complete guide to Profile 2.0 but I thought I'd try to give people some insight before jumping in blindly like I did. I suggest you wait to convert until you have a few hours free to mess with it. Good luck.

If you're new here and like what you see please take a moment and subscribe to my blog and/or recommend it to a friend. Comments are always welcome.

I got the following email from a friend yesterday and thought my response might be worth posting for anyone who might be toying with the idea of quitting smoking (*cough* Rabbit, *cough* Du@ne, *cough* Cory.)

Well, I quit cold turkey but that doesn't work well for everyone. If you think you can handle it, that's the method I recommend. I also didn't use nicotine patches or gum. Using those products will only prolong physical withdrawal which means you'll be prolonging the most difficult period of quitting. I think it's best to get that part over with as fast as possible.

The first day for me was the hardest, and the first 2 weeks weren't very pleasant for me or the people around me. I'd suggest telling your friends and co-workers ahead of time so they aren't in the dark if you suddenly become a mega-bitch. Distance yourself from other smokers- no need compounding temptation- you'll have enough of that without others adding to it. Avoid alcohol like the plague and stay out of bars- it's not a healthy environment for the would-be non-smoker. I'd plan to avoid alcohol completely for at least 2 months but 6 months or more would be even more ideal.

Figure out a positive method for dealing with your nicotine withdrawal before you actually quit. That way you'll know what to do when it happens and you won't have to figure something out on the fly. For me, I decided I'd pick up my guitar every time I had a craving for a cigarette. That was probably one of smartest and most effective things I did to help me quit. Not only did it occupy my mind, it kept both my hands busy so they weren't constantly fidgiting around for cigarettes that didn't exist. Take up an instrument, learn to knit, shuffle cards, etc.

I suggest you avoid using food, even healthy food, as a way to deal with your cravings. You don't want to replace one bad habit with another. Drink lots of water (plain water, not coffee, tea, cola, kool-aid, etc.)- try for a gallon a day. Drinking a gallon of water a day will serve two purposes- first, it will make you feel full without adding calories to your diet and help you to avoid substituting food for cigarettes. Second, it will help you flush the toxins from your body and hopefully help to minimize withdrawal. I bought a handy one-gallon jug that I fill every night and put in the fridge. I make sure I drink it all throughout the day.

I would also highly recommend that you begin an exercise regimen of some sort. Nothing crazy- 30 minutes of continuous fast-paced walking each day should be plenty adequate. Most people gain weight when they quit smoking. A regular exercise routine will keep any weight gain to a minimum.

The only other thing I can say is make sure you really want to quit- there is no substitute for determination. Without real determination, you will never kick the habit. Well, that's all the advice I've got. I hope it helps. Good luck.

Ok, after reading your responses to my last blog I have to admit, I was presented with ideas I hadn't previously considered. Namely that if Obama had been a white man that perhaps he would have won by an even larger margin. After thinking on this for a bit I think I may agree. After all, Republicans really fucked things up over the last 8 years and the base of the party has been on a rapid decline because of it. Couple that with the fact that McCain was essentially a Bush clone and the party really didn't stand a chance.

But the reason I wrote the original article was due to my disgust that race played any part in the outcome of the election- and we all know it did. Whether for better or worse is essentially irrelevant. What bothers me the most is that I've read way too many comments to think that race played only a minor factor in this election. It may not have drastically changed the outcome, but it was still a major factor.

I don't think it will ever happen, but I would like to see the end of partisan politics. Imagine what that would be like. If people were elected on the basis of their individual views and deeds rather than what party they are aligned with. Imagine how much cleaner politics would be. Politicians wouldn't be able to fall back on their parties, which means they'd actually have the incentive to do their jobs to the best of their abilities. Voters would actually have to research candidates prior to voting, meaning truly informed voters showing up to the polls. Those who are too lazy to do their own research wouldn't bother going to the polls. Imagine how much a system like that would benefit our country.

Anyway, thanks for all your comments. It's nice to know some people are driving with their lights on.

I'm curious- how many of you think Obama would have won the election if he were a white man? If he were white, do you think his lack of experience would have cost him the election? If he were a white politician repeating the phrase "change, change, change" like a broken record, do you think the public really would have bought it? After all, politicians have have been feeding us lines like that for hundreds of years, and we all know it's bullshit- yet a black guy says it and suddenly it's the gospel?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter that he won, because I really don't believe McCain would have been a better choice. In fact, I think McCain was the worst possible candidate the GOP could have chosen (assuming they actually wanted to win anyway.) However, I've read way to many blogs and comments from people who freely admit that they voted for Obama simply because he's black to pretend that race didn't play a significant role in this election. I realize that it's a historical event that we have our nations first black president but I can't help but feel ashamed that he probably won because of his race rather than in spite of it. I hope he turns out to be a great President because I predict he'll be the only one we have for the next 8 years. Even if he turned out to be worse than George W. Bush, I have little faith that the people of the US will learn the folly of their ways in only 4 years time.

If you're going to send me hate mail please make it coherent. Also, be sure to subscribe to my blog before you navigate away.

Check out this disturbing little movie Pam found called "The Election."  I'd love to hear what people think of it so make sure you come back and post a comment after you watch it.

So maybe some of you remember my blog about Buddy the skin cancer that I had to have removed back in September. Turns out that Buddy was actually a melanoma, the deadliest form of skin cancer- that son of a bitch! Anyway, as it happens I had to go back to have even more skin removed last week. This time they took a piece about the size of a silver dollar, then squeezed the wound closed and stitched it together. That should be the end of it though.

It was pretty uncomfortable for the first several days, and it's still a little tender but it's getting back to normal. Unfortunately, it's kept me out of the gym for about a week. I'm going back to the gym starting tomorrow, but only for cardio. No weights until my stitches come out- sort of a kink in my fitness plan but such is life. Other than that noise, all is quiet.

On a different note, Clint Eastwood has a new movie coming out in December called Gran Torino. Looks like it might be good. The trailer is on my profile if you want to check it out.

Ok, it's the 14th- 3 months exactly since I started my diet and exercise regimen.  As promised, here are the before and after pictures. I weighed in at about 216 lbs. when the pictures on the left were taken. The pictures on the right were taken tonight and I weighed in at 177 lbs. That's 39 pounds in 3 months.

I still want to drop roughly 10-12 more pounds of body fat before all is said and done. I'll post more pictures when I get where I want to be.

It's been 6 days since my last update. As of today I've lost all 36 pounds that I gained when I stopped smoking. I've been putting in extra effort to be ready for pictures by the 14th and it's going well (4 pounds in 6 days is pretty awesome at this stage of the game.) I've got 12 days left before I post pictures... I'm off to the gym.

It's been a couple weeks so I thought I'd post another update on the diet situation. As of yesterday I've lost a total of 32 pounds- just 4 pounds away from where I was when I quit smoking.

Pam said my stomach looks smaller than before I quit smoking. That kinda makes sense because I've probably put on at least a few pounds of muscle which would mean I now have a lower percentage of body fat than I did then.

I'm definitely happy with the progress I've made but I still have work to do. I'm going to make a major effort to get myself into shape for pictures by October 14th- exactly 3 months from the time I started my diet and exercise regimen. The race is on now. Wish me luck!

So I have this spot on my arm- let's call him "Buddy." Anyway, Buddy has been there for years- we've been through a lot together in that time. Anyway, my mother has been harping on me for years to go to a dermatologist to get Buddy checked out. I finally gave in and scheduled an appointment.

I met with the dermatologist yesterday and he took one look at Buddy and said Buddy has to go. He said there is a chance Buddy is a melanoma but he won't know for sure until after he separates us. So after all this time, our relationship is nearing its end. At 7:30 AM on September 18th Buddy and I will part company forever. I will cherish the memories of the times we've had and reflect on them with fondness.

Buddy has decided to spend his remaining days after the separation traveling the globe in pursuit of bold new adventures. I wish him the best of luck and safety in his travels. I would like to dedicate the following video to Buddy...

Back when I started my diet and exercise regimen, I had Pam take 3 pictures of me with my shirt off- a front view, a side view, and a rear view. I didn't look at them at all until 2 days ago. I can't believe how fucking fat I'd really gotten. I mean, I knew I'd gotten fat, but I had no idea I was really that fat. Reality is a harsh mother-fucker.

I know I said I'd post before and after pics but I didn't realize just how ashamed I was going to be of the 'before' pics. Don't worry, I'm not backing out of the deal I made with you- just know that when I do finally post them, I will be swollowing a lot more pride than I ever imagined I would. I intended to post them the other day, along with some new ones, to show the progress I've made so far, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It's going to have to wait until I feel proud enough of my new body to offset the shame I feel of the old one. Maybe in another month or two... Anyway, that's my update for now.

I logged into MySpace and saw this little bullshit advertisement promoting Avril Lavigne. It said:

"Avril Lavigne rocks harder than any band out there, even when she's toning it down with her power ballad "When You're Gone.""

There are so many things wrong with that sentence that I almost don't know where to start... almost. Ok, let's start with this- anyone that can actually say that sentence with a straight face has 0% credibility since they are obviously fucking crazy. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that Slayer probably rocks slightly harder than Avril. Actually, even Metallica rocks harder than Avril. Hell, I'll even go so far as to say that Huey (I Wanna New Drug) Lewis rocks harder than Avril.

But there is something else that bothers me about Avril- or at least the so-called "punks" that listen to her. I've heard more than a few people refer to Avril's music as punk. Let's get this straight right now- Avril is to punk, what Yanni is to heavy metal- not even remotely fucking related.

Now, just to clarify- Avril singing a ballad with a piano = pop. Wendy O. Williams cutting a piano into pieces with a chainsaw = punk. For those of you who don't know who Wendy O. Williams is, she was a hot chick who really did play punk. She was the real deal. She lived like a punk and she died like a punk and she performed all her own stunts in between. I'm sure some of you have seen this before but for those who haven't...

THE DAMNED - Wendy O. Williams and the Plasmatics

Ok, time for an update. Two years ago, I quit smoking. I gradually picked up 36 pounds over the last two years until I got fed up about six weeks ago and joined a gym, started working out almost everyday, and changed my diet.

So far I've lost about 24 pounds and I'm starting to see a lot more muscle definition. I still have 12 pounds to go to get back to where I was before I stopped smoking but I'm not stopping there. After all this work I'm not content to just simply not be fat- I want to look better than I ever have- and I'm convinced I can do it.

I'm actually surprised at how fast my body has already begun to change. I still have a long way to go but I think the worst is behind me and I feel so much better. Anyway, I just thought I'd share that with you all. If anyone wants the number of my personal trainer just let me know- he's helped me immensely and I'm sure he can help you too. 

Ok, I said I'd try to update my blog more often so here it is. My personal life has been kinda fucked for a while now but I'm trying to get that corrected. That's a two-way street though so we'll have to see how that goes.

On another note, I finally got sick of looking at my fat ass in the mirror. I joined a gym, and got a personal trainer. I've made some pretty radical changes in my diet and I'm exercising nearly everyday. I've been at it for 3 weeks now and I'm already down 16 pounds. I can actually see the difference already so that's pretty encouraging.

Maybe I'll post some before and after pics when I reach my goal- that should be good for a laugh. Anyway, that's all I got for now. I'll try to post again soon. I haven't talked to many of you lately. How are you all doing?