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In Loving Memory of Robby Garvin [♥]

Robby Garvin


Last Updated: 4/18/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 28
Sign: Leo

City: Beaufort
State: South Carolina
Country: US
Signup Date: 6/7/2007

Blog Archive
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Wednesday, June 11, 2008 

Current mood:Lost without him
Category: Life

  Today marks two years since Robby crossed over, one I now call his Angel Day. I still have no clue where the days, weeks, and months have gone. The pain and loss is still the same. Today I lived the episodes of that devastating day all over again in my heart and mind only wishing I could have done something differently.

   They say time heals, well it helped when I lost my father and some very close family members and friends. But, this is different, he was my son, a part of me and for that I will always be lost without him. I am grateful for the time, laughter and memories that he left behind. Those are what I have left to bring a smile on my face then reality sets in and I know I will never see that handsome face again or hear his voice on the other end of the phone.

    If I could just tell him one thing it would be, I love you son and not a day goes by that I do not cry or think of you in some way. I would have taken your place had God given me the chance.

   I guess there will always be a special day that makes the hurt that much harder to get through, like birthdays, christmas and so many others. As much as I try to enjoy these family events it does not go unnoticed that there is an empty space where he should be.

   Robby,

     Today I added a few little things to your memorial garden in the front yard. I hope you can see it and know just how much you are loved and missed. Time has no balance since you left and I often think I am on auto-pilot. My life is consumed to help warn others of the dangers that you were never told. Methadone is still killing so many innocent lives so I know I am not alone in my loss. For now I can only visit you in my dreams.

I love you, Mom

Monday, August 13, 2007 

Current mood:  sad
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

Today we all gathered to celebrate my birthday. As we gathered at the     restuarant and sat at the long extended table their was a seat that wasn't  filled. Another special day in our lives and another moment you should be here, but your not. Grandma wanted to make it extra special for me because it was the big "50". Bet your getting a kick out of your moma being 50 years old. I know if you had been here you would have made me go out to karaoke somewhere and I would have proudly listened to your beautiful voice. You would have made this time in my life so extra special just because of who you are, my loving son.

Grandma just had her 78th birthday in July, another time when a chair was empty. A day does not go by for her that she does not think about you too.  Today after we all sat down to eat she placed a picture of you at the head   of the table and when the cake was brought to the table she had placed on it, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NANCY & ROBBY". She said, " I hope you don't mind that I did that", I replied, "I wouldn't have had it any other way, I love you    Mom". You know that's the last words that came from your precious lips, " I Love You Mom". I am thankful today that I can still say to grandma (my         mom) I love you, in person. Now, I can only say it to you when I am alone   as I speak out loud or as you are in my thoughts.

My birthday will never be the same ever again. We were only three days apart, both leo's. Today, as much as it was nice, it was another reminder of you not being here. On Wednesday, August 15th you would be 26 years old. I know you are still celebrating in the spiritual world. We are sending some balloons to you on your birthday, be looking for them. They are sent with more love then I can put into words.

My pain does not get easier, for everyday my heart longs for your smile and voice, never to be heard and only seen in photo's. One day we will be together again.  Until then, I will see you in my dreams.

With all my love, forever          Mom

 

Monday, June 18, 2007 

Current mood:Taking No Crap !!!!
Category: Life

  When my daughter and myself decided to pay tribute to Robby, as the one year mark approached since his death, I wasn't ready for what would come. Since MySpace is so popular and I have worked all year to spread the word about Methadone, we decided to build a page for Robby. Since I am not so familiar with all the graphic designs needed, Robby's sister Cachet took over. I was so proud of how well she set up what she thought and knew would describe her brother.

   We then set out to let everyone know about his page and observed the adds and comments everyday with comfort that we had done the right thing, or did we? After only a couple of weeks I started receiving a couple of messages full of anger and jealousy. As I tried to respond in a reasonable manner I only received another nasty reply. It all started by this person being offended by their placement on the friends list. Me, being new to MySpace had no clue that placement meant anything. I was just pleased that people joined and honored my son. Knowing Robby as well as both Cachet and I do, we know he would be proud of this site..Why was something that meant to do good was becoming a horrible ordeal? It was very clear this person's mind had been brain-washed to believe some very, very untrue issues. This person was taking advantage of being very cruel showing no remorse or compassion for anyone but themself. They even went as far to say "this site is stupid and whatever, because he's DEAD". By know you have not only disrespected me, my daughter, but DO NOT DISRESPECT my dead son, ever.

   I had made several attempts to smooth this troubled, rude person but I knew after the last comment "he's DEAD" enough was enough.Even after that I still tried to make this person understand that this site was made for ROBBY, and to spread the word how deadly Methadone is. With a hope that maybe someone would read it and stop before they take that deadly pill that could cost them their life. This was not a race on popularity or how important anyone is or was to Robby. That occurred during his life not after his death. It amazes me how people come forth and express their closeness to someone after they have passed away. I have seen this so many times over the years with other families, now it was happening to mine. Along with coldness and a lack of respect for another person's feelings. The pure evilness came through in just a few words and I began to wonder how far was this going to go.

    Thank God this person deleted themself from Robby's site. Because of who I am, I was still going to allow them to be a part of this page even though my first desire was to remove them. I thought O.K. this is over, I really do not need this bizarre behavior to upset me as it had been doing. Then, several messages with  very mean remarks were left on Cachet's message board. We then blocked this person from contacting us and set Robby's site to private. I then sat back and asked my daughter to reset this site back to public veiwing. I was not going to let a very deranged person destroy what I was trying to do. That was to tell Robby's story and warn other's of how dangerous and lethal METHADONE is.

    Today I went by my church and lite a candle and prayed for the negative ways that engulf this person. Maybe it is guilt that has turned into lashing out at someone and passing the blame, I don't know. But what I do know is we made this site for Robby, victims of Methadone and to reduce future victims. If you get offended by where you are located on the friends list, I apologize. There is no ranking here. Just to join, shows how much you thought of him and the cause we are trying to get across to others. Your love and kindness has meant so much to us. I should not let one person who obviuosly has issues affect me the way they did. You are all number one on the friends list and I thank you with all of my heart.

   By the way, this was supposed to be a so-called family member, very sad.

                                                               Love to all,   Nancy

 

    

   

Friday, June 08, 2007 

Current mood:  sad
Category: Blogging

On  June 11, 2006 , you were taken away from us, soon it will be a year, where did a year go? How can someone so loving and caring die from a doctor's negligence and a drug called METHADONE? How does a doctor who is a pain management specialist on Hilton Head, South Carolina prescribe a dose of Methadone that is lethal, and nothing happens to him?    There is not a day that goes by that I am not thinking of you. My life forever changed that day, never to be the same. I miss your love, your smile, your support, your voice and your touch. I miss the way you made us laugh and your ability to accomplish what ever you set your mind to do. I miss the you, the baby I gave birth to, the son I will forever love. Now, I can only look at pictures or hold something that used to belong to you in my arms and at special times I see you in my dreams.  Love, Mom