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Molly Kellett

Last Updated: 12/4/2009

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Gender: Female
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 22
Sign: Aquarius

City: DOYLESTOWN
State: Pennsylvania
Country: US
Signup Date: 6/29/2005

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Wednesday, December 20, 2006

When Kristen and I are EIGHTY!!!
Current mood:

horny
Category: Friends

so when me and kristen are eighty years old.
we will have disolving vagina's.
becuase of all the years of us having sex.
the end.

9:44 PM

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Thursday, November 16, 2006

MAYNARDIAN BIBLE
Current mood:Inspired by Maynard

    Alice ate the bologna while trying the Spanish olives at the Cuban restaurant. She asked the old woman at the bar if the beer was alcoholic and she said no so Alice ordered ten for her and her twenty seven-year-old cousins. Then as she brought the bananas to the table, she saw her favorite TV star, Pickle man. He was known for his certain body part that reminded everyone of a gigantic kosher pickle: his nose. Alice, then, at the sight of him, had an accident. She dropped all of the bananas on Pickle man and ran. From the surprise pickle-banana accident, he had an accident himself because this made him sexually aroused. He dropped his drink! Alice was now running, far, far away. After about a mile, she decided to dress up like a hooker, so she went into a public bathroom and changed. Her sexual energy was so great that it caused all straight men and lesbians to have accidents. These accidents were spilling their drinks all over themselves and looking as if they had peed themselves...and occasionally they did. Some random black guy said...."Damn! You ain't gettin' that. It's like havin' the snap and the crackle but not the POP! It's like having the cherries and the juice with no jar," and then he started to hump Alice. Then he ate the spagetti on the table with no "h!" He was pissed off and horny at the same time.

    Near this string of events Scott The Emo ate at a near by strip club and bar: HOOTERS, the town's family restaurant. He got an order of chicken wings with a side of cocaine. The scary thing is, he wasn't even real.

    Across the street was Sam, or should we say, Samantha, who made up Scott to play a joke on horny fourteen-year-old girls who lived a few miles away. Sam was a depressed soul and wanted to hide his or her (not sure which) exterior. He was a hott then a not-hott guy, who was thought of as a girl. This part of the story is very complicated.

    Meanwhile, on the third floor on top of that building, a Chinese man sat in his apartment groping a young eight-year-old boy's penis. His name is not to be revealed until a later date.

    Michael Jackson was in a nearby room but instead of one boy there was about ten or fifteen of them, and he wasn't just groping!

    After Alice had mad gerbil butt sex with he black guy, people found out and they started a riot for two reasons. One: A black man slept with a white woman, and two: They wanted her! The black guy was later stabbed, choked, beaten, hanged, slapped, and dragged thirty blocks by a fishing pole tied to the back of a Hummer. No one was found guilty since they were all middle class white guys and one Mexican, whose mother was white and rich, so he was fine.
Alice was devastated that her lover was killed, and she disappeared with the Mexican and was never heard from again.

    Scott The Emo left the bar and needed someone to have sex with. After an hour of searching, he found Michael Jackson and the two hit it off quickly.

    Pickle Man was still at the restaurant with his wet pants from the accident that had happened earlier. He was on a date with Brittany Spears, and was pregnant with another child who was not her husband's. They were discussing what the baby's name would be. The temporary couple decided on Pickle Seed, and hoped Brittany's husband wouldn't catch the drift.

    Michael Jackson and Scott The Emo tell the world of their wedding coming up in May, and the child they are having, who Scott. We later find that aliens from the planet Exon implanted Scott's child inside him, and the amazing thing is, thing is that no one ever wondered "how?" before then.

    Sam ends up getting pregnant by one of the Dixie Chicks, or possibly a contortionist in Cirtualla...no one really knows for sure. He is very confused.

    Remember since Scott isn't real, neither is the child because Exon implants children in both the gay and make-believe. So the baby, whose name is going to be Cocolot, is a made-up unborn baby from the planet Exon whose biological parents are (indescribable script) and (indescribable script).

***Oh, by the way, pre-marital sex is allowed, and masterbation is A-OK.***

Currently listening:
Best of Bowie
By David Bowie
Release date: 22 October, 2002