Hi Renee,I was just wondering, was there anything in the book that you were afraid to have out in the open?honestly, there are certainly a few things in there that scare me to death! however, i believe that the hope and encouragement that people might be able to find through these pages will be worth the vulnerability. Hi Renee!
I have a couple of questions if that is ok.
1) What was the inspiration behind the book?
2)how does it make you feel that people find you an inspiration and look upto you?
1. the inspiration behind the book was basically, my life! more in depth i would say that this book was a product of my attempt to recover from the pain in my life through healthier solutions then the previous paths i chose (i.e. cutting, drug abuse, etc) i desperatly long for the outcome of sharing these journals to be one of hope and encouragement.
2. it is one of the most humbling ideas that perhaps someone might be inspired by what god has done through my story. it is the biggest priviledge to have the opportunity to share my heart, and my hope is that people will be able to look past me, and to the one who is truly to be praised for the redemption in my life.
Renee, how nervous are you about the book coming out? I mean, a lot of people know your story but to let them see into your life like they are about to be able to do... that takes a lot of strengh and I think it's pretty amazing.
with any endeavor that involves putting your heart out there (specifically in my case, my journals), there is a risk. i wouldn't say that i am nervous about it's success, or it's contents bieng revealed as i strive to live transparently...
again, i would say the strength and the drive there comes from the heart that i have for people. i want them to know, at whatever the cost, that they are not alone, that perhaps in journying through my pages they may find themselves, and hope for recovery in their own lives...and that, is very exciting!
MY QUESTION!!!
Hello Renee. I have a few questions myself.
1) Two years ago, did you ever imagine you would be in this situation?
2) Did you ever belive that your story would have effected so many people?
3) I struggle with self-ingury and depression. Is there any way to get help to where not a lot of people would get involved? I don't like crowds.
4) How does it feel to be the inspiration for a ton of songs about hope and healing?
hey!
two years ago, i would never of imagined myself sober! that is a blessing and a miracle in and of itself, let alone, to be given such opportunities to share my hope in an outlet as large as this...no, i never saw it coming, i could have only dreamed of such things...and even then i don't think i could've cooked this one up myself!!
through the horror of my using days, the only thing that truly kept me hanging on was the promise of redemption and the belief that god would use my pain to bring healing to others, but i could have never imagined to what extent!!
as far as help for your own personal demons, they can be met and fought out in the quiet and safety of counseling with someone you trust. it's a matter of seeking help in the forums you are comfortable with, for me it has been my counselor and close friends. you don't need a crowd or huge following to uplift and support you, its finding those dear close friends and trusted advisors to sit with you in the dark. there are safe places to heal, just keep looking
oh, as for question number four:
it feels strange, encouraging, humbling...and it is such an honor. (;
Heyy Renee
i frist wanted to let you know you are a huge insprition i love you telling your story and not being ashamed about it
ok so i have a few questions
1 is the book about you life before twloha or after
2 have you ever releasped
and
3 if you go back in time and not do the drugs ad everything knowing it leas to such a great cause would you the book chronicles my journey from addiction and self injury to recovery over a period of about four or five years, so to answer your first question, it is a combination of my life leading up to that point, and then some!
i first starte seeking treatment when i was 18 and relapsed shortly after completing my first 60day rehab program. i continued to cut and then after a period of several months in which i binged and ran as hard as i could i hit a wall, realized i wanted more out of life, enter, twloha and rehab number two!
i have since been sober and on the continuous path of recovery and by the grace of god have not gone back!
i would not change anything that happened in my life, the choices i made or the things i experienced because i have seen the beauty of those things bieng redeemed and they have in turn given me the opportunity to relate to countless of people and that, has made it all worth it. i wouldn't change a thing.
Hi Renee (:
I have a few questions acutally.
-Do you honestly ever think you will go back to where you were?
-Do you still have the urges a lot to SI?
-What is your number 1 inspiration to stay clean and get better?
-Will the book just be availible through TWLOHA or is it sold anywhere else?
Thank you<3
well, the best answer i have for that first question is, god willing, no! i can't predict the future and i don't have all the answers, but i truly blelieve that i am done. i can't worry about the future, what might happen later today, tomorrow, or even a few years from now. all i have is today, and today i am ok. one day at a time. (;
i do experience urges from time to time, but over the past few years they have lessened and through each time i fight through them and find new solutions i get stronger, and their power over me weakens. they don't come as often, but this disease (cutting, addiction, etc is a disease, an addiction) is cunning, baffeling, and powerful, i am always on my toes but i will say that it gets better in time.
i have learned over time that my first priority in my recovery has to be myself, my heart, who god created me to be. i stay sober for myself, so that secondly, i may offer the hope and new life that i have found, to others whenever and wherever i can.
presales are going through twloha today, and there is also another site
www.districtlines.com that will be doing presales as well.
I know that the book is called Purpose for the Pain, but is the pain worth it to have changed so many lives? or would you rather have lived a better life without so much pain and not change lives like this book will?
is the pain worth it to have changed so many lives...YES YES AND YES. that, is what made it all worth it to me. i would not change anything about my life if i could, because it has made me who i am today and allowed me the chance to offer hope to others out there that have experienced some of the same pains as i did.
Hi Renee.
I do have a couple of questions. Hopefully you won't have already answered them a million times already lol.
So when Jamie first talked to you, did you have any idea how big TWLOHA would be? Did you even know what his plan was at the time?
And I know I'm battling with a few problems as are many of the people on here. Do you have any words of encouragement or insight for us? Maybe helpful tips on how to get through our lower points?
Thanks so much and I can't wait for your book! Oh and I love your hair style! I wish I could get mine to look like that =]
when i first spoke with jamie, i had no idea the impact or coverage it would have. my heart in sharing was with the desire that perhaps one person would hear my story and find hope...this meager dream has been far exceeded and i would never have seen it coming!!
all i knew was that he was writing an article for a magazine called relevant, which i had never heard of!! hahaha, i'm glad it surpassed that and grew to reach countless more!
as far as the low points, i would say to fight to find new solutions to your problems. the old habits die hard, and they need a new outlet, healthy alternatives to our old destructive ways. support groups like alcoholics anonymous, or other anonymouos programs are a GREAT help, as well as counseling, developing close and open friendships with people older and wiser who can pour into your life in those dark times. and. for me personally, god has been the biggest resource i have relied on to pull me through when i didn't have the strength. whatever your higher power may be, i would tell you to rely on that with all you have.
...yyyyeah, my hair...prrrretty awesome stuff, eh?! hahahahha thank you!!
renee,
first of all, i just wanna say you are truly amazing,
and an inspiration
so, my question is:
what do you see yourself doing in the near future, will you continue writing?
or will this be the only book?
thanks so much!
well, i have many plans for the future. i dream of infiltrating every aspect of the media with the message of hope and new life!! muahahha!!...seriously.
another book may be in the future, but for now my focus is getting this one out there and persuing some speaking gigs.
stay tuned!
Hi Renee!
I've read your story and everything about TWLOHA, and though not labeled a "Christian" or "faith-based" organization, there are a lot of statements made by the staff and you yourself that are causing me to wonder...
When you refer to redemption are you referring to redemption through Jesus Christ? Is that part of your journey that you wrote about in your book? And what would you say your biggest dream and goal for this book is?
while twloha doesn't lable themselves a "christian organization" we do share some common beliefs about themes like faith and hope and love... when i speak of redemption i do mean, pertaining to my own life, redemption through christ. i believe there is nothing he can not redeem and i am not ashamed to say so, however i am not going to cram "religion" down anyone's throat. i believe that our actions and the way we live our lives should say enough.
it is most certainly part of my journey and my relationship with god is something i wrestled with through my addiction and road to recovery.
my biggest dream for this book is to encourage, inspire, give hope and empart the idea that freedom from addiction and self destruction is indeed, possible. i want to clearly depict the struggle, the fight for this new life as it defies everything inside of us, but also the beauty in it. if it helps but one person in any way, i am completley satisfied.
Renee,
I won't bombard you with questions, but:
How much does this book mean to you?
I know of so many times where i almost slipped, but I managed to stay strong by merely watching you tell your story on youtube. and I know it means a lot to me and countless more that you were able to stay strong and, in result, help so many people. so thank you. (:
oh, it means the world to me. it is a tangible way that i get to see some of my dreams realized. it is not only a healing process for me to put these things out there, but it also encourages me to know that perhaps someone out there, much like yourself, might be encouraged to keep fighting even when it gets hard. thank you for asking!
let me first start off by saying you have an incredible story, that has definitely changed lifes; i look at things at a higher positivity level now =]
my only question regarding the book is what you'd like to get out of it?
i.e. are you trying to help people see that life gets better, or stuff along those lines?
my dream for this book is to see it give others hope through my story, that they may be encouraged to fight for healing, redemption, and change in their own lives. i hope to let others see that they are not alone, and that it is possible. i would also hope that for those that have not suffered this journey, that they may have an inside look at someone who has that they may learn to love and fight for the people suffering in their lives.
is there a scar on your arm that says fuck up like the story and if so how do you feel when you look at itfortunately the scars from those words did not remain there. there are other s to remind me of where i was, and they are one in the same, really. when i look at my forearms i used to shudder in disbelief. now, i look at them and see a story of healing and beauty growing out of the pain. it reminds me of where i was and how far i come and i am growing to love them.
This isn't so much about the book, just curiousity, but what do you want to do with your life career-wise?
i would love to travel and speak, and invest specificallly into other people's counseling. i want to establish practical ways to reach addicts in recovery and provide new revenues for them to life their lives. i want to invest in dreams. i want to reach the darkest parts of the world. i want to get muddy and love people the best that i can. i'd love to spend some time in thialand working with women rescued from prostitution and many other things... there's a lot i would love to accomplish with my life!!
Hey there Renee.
First off, thanks ever so for taking the time to answer our questions regarding your book.
I was just wondering, did you find it a struggle to persevere with the compilation of your journals/writing this book? I can understand it was probably quite an internal struggle going back thru all of those thoughts & memories, did you ever at one point or another feel like it was too much?
& if so, what spurred you to carry on?
no problem, it means the world to me!
it was a struggle at times to continue putting these journals together, but i knew in my heart that it was for something far greater than i...and so i persisted and saw it through to the end.
there were points that i read over that i had completely forgotten about, a lot of aweful memories brought back to my mind that i essentially had to relive, but that is part of the process. i had locked a lot of those traumas away, and now, i am choosing to face them, fight them, and heal. so, the prospect of finding true healing is what drove me to keep going, and my genuine love for others that have faced these same trials. i just long for people to know that there is a better way and that it does get better..