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Thursday, March 20, 2008
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Category: Blogging
Recent events have brought something disturbing to my attention. The Internet has grown a mad fascination with trying to make Jim Davis’ curiously lasting strip, Garfield, funny. Why would the Internet care about this? I’ve no idea. I have noted three approaches which have varying degrees of success. The varying comes from how your funny bone is hooked together. So in chronological order I present, Project: Garfield’s Funny Now or Three Different ways to put a Dress on a Pig. 1) In 2006, The Internet learned that by taking away Garfield’s speech bubbles, the strip becomes a lesson in surrealist comedy. When Jon Arbuckle, the rather sad and pathetic cartoonist bachelor, comes home to complain about his lousy job and poor social life to his pet, Garfield thinks up witty sarcastic responses in thought balloons. Jon doesn’t hear Garfield, although often he can tell what Garfield is thinking due to body language or he responds to Garfield’s inattentiveness. (And sometimes, the strip strays off concept for a while and Jon seems to understand Garfield as though he were talking.)
In other words, Jon is coming home and holding one-sided conversations with his cat. He isn’t hearing anything. To see what Jon is seeing, you’d have to remove his thought balloons. Countless more live on the Truth and Beauty Bombs forum. 2) Early this year, I found The Internet had birthed this bizarre video mashup treatment called Lasgana Cat. I can only guess these are key moments in Garfield’s long history they chose to mock and destroy. It’s that or the strips that caused The Internet to have the most mental fits of anguish. More of Lasgana Cat’s disdain(admiration?) on their You Tube. 3) Only recently, which by The Internet’s time telling ability is just hitting middle age, it learned* that by taking Garfield completely out of the picture, you get something else entirely. Much more surreal-arity** at Garfield Minus Garfield tumblelog. All of these findings are in the order that I learned about them. I’m wondering why The Internet cares so much about a sub-par, soft and squishy, mainstream comic strip that just won’t die. It’s been said that love and hate are flip sides of the same coin. It’s been my experience that the people who said that have too much time to think and are wholeheartedly correct. Maybe The Internet is actually *in love* with Garfield and the only way it can express that love is through condemnation. A sort of twist on wearing a wife-beater and complaining about burnt eggs scenario. Hmm, maybe *I* have too much time on my hands to think. *Thanks to Coilhouse for spurring this trilogy of bad cat jokes. **surreal-arity = "Surreal Hilarity" It’ll catch on, I promise. Just be sure to quote me as the one who coined it. Groonkable Links:
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Tuesday, February 26, 2008
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It was 7:45, we were all in line 2 greet the teacher Miss Kathleen First was Kevin, then came Lucy, third in line was me All of us were ordinary compared 2 Cynthia Rose She always stood at the back of the line, a smile beneath her nose Her favorite number was 20 and every single day If U asked her what she had 4 breakfast, this is what she'd say
Starfish and coffee, maple syrup and jam Butterscotch clouds and a tangerine, a side order of ham If U set your mind free, baby, maybe U'd understand Starfish and coffee, maple syrup and jam ---Prince, Starfish & Coffee
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Monday, February 25, 2008
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Category: Blogging
FREAKANGELS is a free, weekly ongoing comic written by Warren Ellis and drawn by Paul Duffield. As the interview with Warren Ellis via CBR states: "FreakAngels" takes place in an imaginative future world in which something has gone horribly wrong. In this case, the "something" is the fault of the FreakAngels themselves, a group Ellis described in a "Bad Signal" email blast as "a clan of unrelated young people with purple hair and purple eyes." The trouble, Ellis goes on to say, comes when "a girl called Alice from Manchester turns up with a shotgun and a grievance, having met the lost, prodigal last Freakangel, who had very different ideas about what they should do with themselves and this flooded future England." Aside from the more than consistant, lovely storytelling by Ellis and the wonderful character designs and artwork by Duffield, FREAKANGELS has something else worth noting. It's a completely free comic done by comic professionals. It's out there on the web for all to see and enjoy. Also, the professionals in question are getting paid for their work. The comic is free and the creators are being paid. Avatar Press has gone and made me a happy 21st Century Man. For readers, the benefits of a free web comic from a top-name creator are obvious. But from a publishing standpoint, there are still many questions surrounding web content—particularly free, open access content—that still do not have straight, easy answers. What is the best way to present material online? How will free access affect sales of a printed edition? How does one measure whether the endeavor has been successful? There are genius webcomics out there in Internetland. Yet I have not run across a site yet that features fully established creators putting their work on something that is not a clunky flash reader. Each page is a jpg without any browser enabled image blocking. In theory, a savvy user could download each page and have the entire collection living on their harddrives. What they do with it after that is anyone's guess. I'm sure Avatar Press will release a printed collection as soon as the content allows. But they're taking a lot on faith. They're hoping that people would rather have nicely organized stack of dead trees, than digital shadows lurking about random external drives. In my case, they're half right. I appreciate the convenience of the webcomic yet I'd rather re-experience the story away from the burden of technology. Nothing compares to a quiet night, a book at the ready, and your iPod whispering sweetness in your ears. I hope this experiment is the beginning of something new. I'd like the think that Marvel or DC or even smaller publishers can take full advantage of the internets in a similar fashion and not feel threatened by all the inherit dangers within. I also hope that Paul Duffield doesn't mind me using his works to make a widescreen wallpaper. If there is a problem, just follow the link on the above picture and leave a comment on my Flickr. Below are links to the first two episodes of FREAKANGELS with a link to Avatar's official FREAKANGEL wallpaper set.
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Saturday, February 23, 2008
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Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
While watching DINOSAURS RETURN TO LIFE on The Discovery Channel I heard the following: "Late one night, Harris is studying feathers in a strain of mutant chickens" --Narrator, Dinosaurs Come to Life My love of that line is beyond all sense. The absurdity of it. The practicality of it. The mashup of the two is divine. Let me say, Discovery Channel, you make it damn near impossible to find a damn thing on that digital confusion you call a website. You know who your audience is, why not try to live up to their standards a bit harder? I never found a main site for this wonderful show you aired. It's as if you don't want people to know it exists. You air love and deny any chance of finding it again. I'm kinda pissed off at you for that. Yet I'll continue to watch you cause I'm science's bitch. Your treatment of me, it is confusing.
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Wednesday, February 20, 2008
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Tuesday, February 19, 2008
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Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
Completely improvised, Free Radio offers a fresh alternative to the typical sitcom, showing just how far real A-List celebrities will go to tolerate a complete moron. In season one, Hollywood luminaries from "24's" Kiefer Sutherland to "Heroes'" Jack Coleman and comedy legend Ray Romano are subjected to the idiot storm that is Lance and "Moron in the Morning." I would not have believed it possible. FREE RADIO is a improvised comedy series on VH1. Yes, VH1 has comedy. No, they don't play videoes anymore. We're long past that stage of questioning. The celebrity camoes are A-Listers. I'm unsure how they managed that but I am sure it makes all the difference. Watching Lance make random asshat comments is half the fun. Seeing which of those A-List folk have the chops for improv is the other half. The Skinny in newly fashionable list form:
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Monday, February 18, 2008
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Current mood:  shocked
Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
The new Knight Rider. I'll be damned if I wasn't ok with it. A straightforward, simple adventure with a supercar that talks. I'll admit to geeking out a little. at the beginning inside the inventor's workshop. Seeing bits of old KITT lying about and the Foundation's old logo overloaded my nostalgia. The 11 year old me couldn't help but to smile. Back in the 80s, I only sent out two fan letters. KNIGHT RIDER was one of them. Getting a print out of KITT's specs through the mail made my month. Lame, yes. You couldn't tell Kid Groonk that. Not back then, in the me-some 80s. There were sequences that can only be described as Car Porn. Long, lingering shots of KITT's shiny Shelby form in high speed. Sultry glances of KITT's metamorphing into random mustangs. Definite Car Porn. But, yeah, the new Knight Rider was not a boatload of fail. It was, in fact, a case full of adequate.** Although, Val Kilmer as KITT I couldn't reconcile with that. His voice sounded incredibly forced. My ears were set to hear Gob* and through random corporate asshattery, they switch it out for the lame Batman. Burn. *If you watch the promo video on Shadowy Flight, you can hear how much awesome Will Arnett managed to cram into the few KITT-isms you hear in 29 seconds. **Anyone who thought this Knight Rider was crap did not see Team Knight Rider, Knight Rider 2010, or the 80s show direct sequel Knight Rider 2000. If you did not see them, count yourself lucky.
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Sunday, February 17, 2008
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Current mood:  complacent
Category: Music
Last night was fairly uneventful. Running into Ben Trussell and his band Leaving Madison at Philby's turned out to be most pleasant.
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Wednesday, May 30, 2007
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Current mood:  aggravated
if you are a bot or human comment posters, be aware that i will nuke your ass if your image breaks my design.
seriously.
break the format and fully cognisant nuclear fusion missles will be fired upon your exact location and they will decimate your ability to do anything more useful than clutching a fork firmly in one hand.
you were warned.
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Tuesday, January 23, 2007
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Current mood:  awake
Category: Blogging

XKCD still amusing after all this time.
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Saturday, December 23, 2006
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Current mood:  cheerful
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Wednesday, November 29, 2006
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Happy belated Thanksgiving. That's one of the finer bits of comedy from the 80s. Damn thing still makes me laugh.
 | Currently listening: Rie Fu By Rie Fu Release date: 27 January, 2005 |
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Thursday, November 16, 2006
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Current mood:  chipper
you can be cool like me and join as well: http://www.myspace.com/jgredhator watch others with the sickness at the James Gunn Blogthat is all.
 | Currently listening: Soldier Girl By The Polyphonic Spree Release date: 24 February, 2004 |
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Monday, October 30, 2006
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Current mood:  cheerful
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Monday, October 23, 2006
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Current mood:  awake
Category: Pets and Animals
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