Last night me and Kathy were sitting on the couch watching some TV before bed, and we let Ali crawl around and explore the living room. Ali pulled herself up against the wall and was standing there for a second, just looking at us. She wanted to know what would happen if she slapped the wall with her hand, so she raised up her right hand and smacked the wall with all her might - and nothing happened. She looked at the wall, looked at her hand...then head-butted the wall.

"WAAAAAH!"

She crawled to Kathy in tears, then after she was done cuddling she went back and did the EXACT same thing again! I was thinking to myself, "come on, can't you see that doing that is going to hurt you?!"

As I watched her cry in Kathy's arms again, I was thinking to myself...you know, I bet this is how God feels when He watches me live my life. I'm not sure if God gets frustrated with us or not, but I keep making the same mistakes over and over again. *sigh*

Are you bored of hearing the same lessons, over and over again? I am.

Are you tired of wondering if the person you're speaking with is who they say they are, or an entirely different person on this one day of the week where we gather together under the Christian banner? I am.

Have you wondered if going to church is a necessary exercise or just a boring habit you do because you're supposed to? I have.

Have you wonderered what your life would be like without church; and came to the conclusion that it would be better?

I believe every Christian comes to a place in their life when they start to wonder if the weekly gathering is really a necessary part of their life. Maybe the questions begin because they're bored with the experience. Maybe the weeks pass by without attending a service and you don't notice a change in your life. Maybe you've done something you're ashamed of and decided to not go back. Maybe something terrible has happened to you and you withdrew from God's house and the people that claim to follow Him.

I've been through every situation I listed above, and each time I stopped going to church. I didn't notice a big difference right away, but over time (and in hindsight) I saw what church did to me. It made me a better person. Some people attend church weekly out of habit, and it is nothing more to them than an exercise in puffing themselves up or fooling themselves into thinking that they're ok.

I go to church because I know that the sermon I will hear will contain truth, conviction and good news (if they don't find another church). I go to church because there are a few people there that encourage me in my daily life to be the best person I can be...not the most successful, but the best. I go to church because I need it.

Why do you attend (or not attend) church?

I know my title for this rant isn't innovative, unique or smart - but neither are any of the ideas that this candidate is bringing to the table. The Republican nomination of John McCain may be one of the biggest mistakes that the Republican party has made in the last decade. McCain is a "centrist" candidate who tries to appeal to everyone but doesn't excite anyone.

McCain has changed his positions on a few of the major issues so I'm not sure what to believe; and he hasn't presented any ideas on changing the status quo in the direction I want it to go. He's making it sound like he won't pursue any real change in the way we're doing things, so I guess a vote for McCain is a vote for the way things are now.

I was hoping to vote FOR someone this election, but it looks like I'll just plugging my nose and voting against Obama with my vote. *sigh*

I hesitate to write this blog because I can't stand people trying to manipulate me into changing my viewpoints on politics. In that vein, think of this blog as a collection of my thoughts towards the candidacy of Mr. Obama and not an appeal for you to change your mind in either direction.

To begin, I think Barack is a good man. I've never met him, but he doesn't come off as sleazy or dishonest. That being said, there are a few policy points and other items that have convinced me that I will not be voting for him in November.

Item 1: He supports abortion. This is a deal-breaker for me, I can't support anyone who supports abortion. I know Obama is all for protecting this "right," and McCain was for it but now he's against it (thoughts about McCain in another post).

Item 2: He supports universal health care. The government continues to screw things up, and I don't want them in charge of health care or nationalizing an industry. Also, Barack's plan calls for every American to pay for this system even if you opt to sign up for something else – heck no!

Item 3: His "bitter" comments. He was in a private setting, during a fund-raising meeting with some of his most liberal supporters (the meeting was in San Fran) when he made the remarks about people turning to God and guns out of bitterness. Those remarks left me wondering if he was either speaking his mind in what was supposed to be a closed setting (no reporters present) or if he was pandering to the group he was speaking to. Either way, I don't like it.

Item 4: His voting record in the Illinois Senate. Obama voted "Present" as opposed to "yea" or "nay" over seven hundred times to avoid having to take a stand. I realize he hasn't done that in the Senate (to my knowledge) but that record shows he didn't have a back-bone, and that worries me.

Those are my issues with Obama. Your thoughts?

Life for the Branning Family took an unexpected turn yesterday – I was informed that my job had been outsourced to Romania! The Chief Technology Officer at Buzznet called me in his office, praised me up one side and down the other for the job I was doing and the gains I was making…and then told me to clean out my desk.

Kathy was absolutely ecstatic when she heard the news, she has longed for the day when I am my own boss again. The plan is for me to start up my own business again; I've been doing work on the side for months now so I have a client base built up and there are some very exciting opportunities in the works for some very big jobs.

Please keep me and my family in your prayers as we make this adjustment.

I didn't expect having a little girl would change my view of the "big girls" but I was wrong. Holding Ali's little body in my arms after a bath and seeing women with no respect for themselves it really puts reality into perspective: these women were once the treasured little girl of a dad like Ali is to me now. I know it sounds really cheesy, but having a little girl has made me look at other women in a different light.

Ali has also really softened me as a person; I can tell that I'm much more patient now. She has a way of breaking my selfish spirit, hearing her seemingly endless cries of pain would take my nerves to the breaking point and I could feel my anger start to creep up, even though it wasn't her fault that she was ruining my night's sleep. I slowly began to have a change of heart; and while I'm nowhere near being a completely understanding man I have much, much more sympathy for her which has given me more patience outside of fatherhood. I was (and still am, if I'm honest with myself) a pretty selfish guy so to have this little butterball interfere with my sleep schedule and my "mommy-daddy" time would infuriate me, but now I can tell that I'm becoming a teensy bit more selfless. It's a process...

Having a little baby (especially an uber cute one) really draws the crowds; and with them the endless barrage of opinions on parenting! I have had to learn to firmly say "No" when people push (and push and push) for me to do parenting their way. It's made me a stronger man and forced me to learn how to deal with potential conflicts in a much more diplomatic manner. An added benefit: Kathy finds me standing up for my family and our beliefs is hot. ;)

UPDATE: We bought a new car! We got a beautiful blue 2003 Dodge Durango from CarMax; and we had a -great- car-buying experience. I highly recommend CarMax to anyone.

THOUGHT: I hate that I like the new Miley Cyrus song, "See you again"

UPDATE: I "upgraded" my phone to an old Blackberry (Blackberry 7250), it's fun. :)

THOUGHT: The movie Baby Mama is HILARIOUS!! "(pump fists on both sides of head) WOO WOOO!" ... LOL

UPDATE: Ali is 8 weeks old today and is the cutest baby ever...I love her more than anything in the world (besides Kathy)

THOUGHT: Great point from Pastor Chris' sermon - "A great way to find out what areas in your own life that you're struggling in is to take account of the faults you consistently point out in others."

UPDATE: My sis is in town and got to meet Ali, very cool to see my sis again

THOUGHT: I highly recommend that all of my friends have babies - they will break your spirit and crush all of your selfish tendencies and you'll be a better person because of it. :)

UPDATE: I'm sort of moving towards managing my own project at work - very very cool

THOUGHT: Whoever said that your dreams stop when you have a kid is an f-ing idiot. My dreams have only gotten bigger

UPDATE: I am embracing/dealing with my inner nerd

THOUGHT: I love spoiling my wife

Me and my friend were talking the other day; and one of his points that really hit home is the reminder that every day we should wake up with the attitude that Christ in indwelling us - and act according to that truth. Act as if Christ has taken over our body and inherited our memories and consequences and live out our day accepting this reality and doing the best we can with the situation we've been given. The magnitude of the change that would take place in my life if that were my daily attitude would be huge (btw I totally tried putting on that mindset this morning and it helped a LOT).

Bearing the previous thought in mind; it is much harder to assume the same for other people; that they have Christ indwelling -them- and that they are living out their life the best they can while dealing with the memories and consequences of their previous actions. I've lost close friends because they couldn't get over my past actions so I have felt the sting of unjust judgement; yet I do the same thing to others.

Just a thought...